shoefreak:

That's my point. To her, stop naggin!!! Or he will go wia dey don't nag

To him, stop being a grumpy old man, or she will she will start visiting the Diesel' store more often than she should and it ain't cos she wanna buy a pair of jean.

It's not the cheater that's to fix it alone, the cheatee to should also search him/herself.

Cheating won't fix the problem just like crying your shoe is hurting won't do a thing.

LordReed:

Cheating won't fix the problem just like crying your shoe is hurting won't do a thing.

I hear you. You just don't get it!

HFOG:
shoefreak: Two wrongs don't make a right. I'm wondering if you'll be able to say this if [b]you've been the perfect wife and he cheats on you. [/b]Talking is cheap I dare say. But if indeed this is your persuasion then pls don't bother getting married. I just hope you're not cheating or planning to and simply trying to justify yourself. There is never a good reason to do a bad thing.

I will find out why. That's why I said it may be the person out there and then I get all up in her face and buz. Sniff out what's making him cheat and nip it in the bud. I'm not gonna cry to friends that blablabla. They'll just tell me 'eeeyyyaaa. Okunrin o ma lorun ooo.' load of crap when in actual fact he may even be cheating on me with one of them.

I'm faithful to d faithful. Simple. Marriage is overrated, but it can be worked on anyway. But it's the general supposedly acceptable ideology of it that makes me wanna puke when I think of some marriages. Like WTF!

KelvinGraphics:

@Madam Shoefreak iam watching U too o

in what D? hi sonny.

shoefreak:

That's my point. To her, stop naggin!!! Or he will go wia dey don't nag

To him, stop being a grumpy old man, or she will she will start visiting the Diesel' store more often than she should and it ain't cos she wanna buy a pair of jean.

It's not the cheater that's to fix it alone, the cheatee to should also search him/herself.

lol...we can only fix if I knw ur problem b4 u cheat but after cheating, there is nothing to fix. WE ARE DONE

So in summary, it is ok for one to cheat if his wife nags or if her husband isn't affectionate? Ok...

@adaeze003: in summary, don't allow him/her to cheat. You are with him/her for a reason and he/she chose you for a reason. Him cheating is a defect that you need to find and eliminate instead of whinning and fretting over it. What we easily forget is that no one just cheats. So yes, if it takes the wife to stop the nagging and adopt the 'snatcher's attitude, then so be it. No husband starts as an unaffectionate boyfriend, you shouldn't be married to him if it can't be endured. So, you ave to find out what the cause of the loss of affection is and make remedies.


**sighs**
Men!!! Am I the only one that thinks like this?! And yet we wonder why there are a Lot of threads on 'leaving my boyfriend/husband/partner' and we are quick to get all fussy instead of asking what he/she did. It's easy to say he/she doesn't deserve you, blablabla. If he cheats, you should have known him to have wandering eyes even before marrying him and yet, you did. That's the mistake most ladies make and when he doesn't get his wandering eye in check after marriage, all hell breaks loose. YOU KNEW HE HAD THE WANDERING EYES!!! Duh!!!!

I wouldn't want to be cheated on. That's why it's good to keep everything in place. Not just at home, but make sure you mark your territories outside the home. Adopt strategies that may cause your faithful wife/husband/partner/boyfriend to remain faithful. Who is that person his eyes lingers on at the office, watch her! Who is the guy whose name seems to spring up in your wife's conversation too often? Watch him!!

Chai! Omo, loonnng thing oo.

This idea that women cheat solely for emotions is wrong, wrong, wrong.
All women cheat for plain old sex urges. Nothing fancy. They just claim it's emotions, in the typical feminine manipulative attempt to shift blame and seem mysterious.

I simply don't understand you. Been reading your post buh I think you have some "idea" of cheating that I consider flawed. Your topic offered guys a chance to be all over saying things like "tell them oh" and all that but they didn't. Instead, some read n exited. Why? Probably coz cheating is not solely based on a nagging wife but selfishness and the stupid claim of being polygamous in nature. Some men get a kick just knowing they can cheat and get away with it. As 4 women? They're probably bored and in need of excitement which is also a stupid reason to cheat btw.
"There is no good reason to do a bad thing" saw it somewhere on NL n I agree 100%.

I guess we don't reason alike afterall coz u see cheating as a cry for help and I see it as the ultimate betrayal of trust.

You've never been cheated on b4? Yet you know why people cheat? Hmm! Ever wondered why marriage counsellors are married? Coz unless you have 1st hand experience, you can't offer advise on certain issues.

The "wondering eyes" part of your post makes sense tho(I'll give you that) but every other tn is just...

^^ **I laugh in Chinese** chai...

Marriage counselors 'remain' married because they see beyond the supposed perfection of fairy tale kind of marriage. This kind doesn't just happen, both parties work on it. Like I said, it's my opinion. Comment or not, I don say my own. I ave had it with all these 'my husband/boyfriend is cheating on me' thread that's all over the place. A wandering eye will remain so unless you turn yourself from being perfect to being a center of attention and that goes beyond being a prim and proper woman of the house, a touch of bitchy won't hurt anyone!

And yes, I have been cheated on before. The way we react to cheating partners differ. I found out who she was and What 'he' saw in her and it wasn't all that. And yes its selfish to remain unchanged when you know you van find out what's making him/her cheat and nip it.

Just the first three paragraphs i read i understood where the op is coming from. I won't talk too much anyway,it is well.

I get ur point shoefreak...ur advice helps those whoze unfaithful partners actually acted based on the points u raised...but then, there are some others who r just cheats for the sake of it....They just cant stick to one person..even tho they claim to really luv their spouse.

Personally, i always advocate for discussions. Whatever irks u about ur spouse, thrash it out..cheating can sometimes be avoided when ppl agree to take corrections for the better. It hurts alot when someone u luv betrays u like dat...


#murder.

Reminds me of the guy who put up a post about his girlfriend not making the effort to look good in the house anymore after sleeping with her.

Ofcourse most people started ranting about how he only fell in love with her pretty face didn't love "the whole of her" *this one got me laughing hard* and how he should love her regardless (BS if you ask me)

i don't subscribe to cheating but most people don't just get the fact that you continuously have to keep your partner interested in you. That's where the bulk of the work lies