You must be completely outta ya 4ckin mind to even post a thread like dis, wat r u trying to do? Encourage ppl psychologically to practice adultery?.. Other men who r faithful n loyal to their spouse nor be fellow men like ur bag of shit u call husband?... You beta run away frm dat boundage u call marriage if ur bag of shit refuse to change his bad habit n be faithful to u weda na only rice or garri u feed him all d days of his life. Gbam!

aisha2: If you are not married to him yet please dont marry him and years down theline disturb God with prayers on what you could have avoided.

He is not marriage material, he does not understand or respect marriage, if women would refuse to settle for less they would stop getting less .

Aisha is quite serious,

YES.... but there is a condition..... *that he ll allow me to have a fling too... even if it means out of 10 times he decides to have... he allows me have Atleast 'one'(you see I am not asking for too much.)...only one fling.


If he won't let me .. then it's a no mbok.

I would continue to say this...reading every1 comment just keeps making me laugh @ op 1st ur bf/husband loves you from my own VIEW...flings and cheating are 2 diff tinz...Flings-you ain't attached with the person u having it with in any way..Cheating-you are attached 2 the person in everyway,infact you are either dating d person alongside the oda 1 you have @ home or the main 1...now back 2 my conclusion 98% of guyz have flings/cheat while 80% of ladies cheat/flings...so if u find urself lucky 2 have som1 who is honest enough 2 tell you he has flings try to be considerate and a lil bit happy because if you like it or not my sis it wud happen...it takes the grace of God 2 find the 2% that won't do it...and the issue of you knowing wen he cheats lol u Neva meet real coded guyz....if every1 is saying NO way then be prepared for what comes next you either dump him and go 2 anoda guy that wud b extreamly coded and would feed you with lies or you just keep changing dem till you accept it has a norms

Breakup with the guy. Thats just crossing the line; but feel free if you are desperate to marry. I can assure you though that he will always cheat on you IF he marries you, you will barely be happy in this union, no be curse o.....#muttering to myself "how the heck do girls reason though"??

And dont decieve yourself by thinking he isnt successfully cheating on you right now, thats just unrealistic. im sure he is getting it constantly infact. . There are guys who don't cheat. Theres no excuse for any guy to cheat, except you want to decieve urself with the excuse "all men cheat"

jayseehe: Life is like Nairaland. People will like your problems and comment, but no one will solve them because everyone is busy updating theirs.

And, why is life so full of problems that everyone got one to update?? #JustCurious

Cecediva: God forbid!

OP, see almost all your topics are about Men, boyfriend, cheating, love. Why is it that ladies have their whole life revolving around Men and relationship and yet complain? Na wah o!

kamdyjenny: Pls oohh I nid ur suggestions nd advice here. Am som1 dat loves to give a man some space nd then letting him do wat he wants. Bt trust me I cld be a great detector. I cld monitor everytin u do( I do dis stlyishly coz I dnt want to be called posseive). Now its rather very hard for my guy to cheat on me witout me finding out. Very hard! Coz I must. Ok now listen d last time I caught him cheating on me was 6months ago. I was outa of town for 1week nd He brought a gurl home. Ok wen I came bk it took me jst 2wiks nd I found out he was with som1. I confronted him,normaly he wld want to lie bt lata he said d truth and confessed hw wveytin happened. He said it was jst a mere fling. Ok! Now we where chatting normally some days bk, nd he was lyk can I let him have a fling? Dats is I wld be aware dat he is som woman nd won't complain, my first amswer was a sounding NO! So he went ahead to say he does nt want to kip lying to me anymore coz one lie begets plenty lies. Nd wants to tell him wen he is having a fling wit a gurl. Abeg oohh matured guys nd gurls. Wat do u tink abt dis. I prefer answers from matured minds. Wld u let ur spouse flirt??

Straight to your question, YES. I will let her flirt so i can also flirt. I hope that satisfactorily answers your enquiry. And yes, i am a mature mind.

Like the man who sent a spreadsheet of times his wife's refused to have s3x wt him because she couldn't cope wt her husband demands. there are of such instances in which such wife had to tell the husband to seek a protected satisfaction elsewhere in order to avoid being 'killed' by d husband's libido.

Sophyrocks: Op, tell your hubby that you will allow him to have a fling only when he allows you to have one too. In other words, you guys should opt for an open marriage. Problem solved.

O.k, let me be serious. i think your hubby is not used to staying with only one woman at a time or has never being faithful to any lady he has dated before you and has never being faithful to you. Now what i am amazed at is the level of tolerance you have shown towards this attitude. I feel you gave him so much freedom, that he translated it to having side chicks while dating you. But you chose to turn a blind eye to it in the name of 'Giving him his space because he is a Man'. Dnt get me wrong. A man needs his space BUT NOT the kind of space where he is free to keep side chicks and become unfaithful. No man would ever allow that from a woman. Now he saw how comfortable you were with his lifestyle and so had the AUDACITY to ask you to your face if you can allow him to have flings!!
A man can never have the audacity to ask you of such if you have never shown that you are o.k with it.

As for your question, I CAN NEVER allow flings in my marriage. I WILL NEVER MARRY A MAN WHO REASONS THIS WAY. I can never marry a man whose lifestyle is this way. Flings in a marriage is an evidence that something is wrong with that marriage.

Endorsed !

Poster is a very careless human being. Her husband told her it was just a fling and she just agreed. I am not saying it was a lie.

But for her hubby to bring a woman to the house in her absence and she is claiming detective shows she is plain clueless.

While some girls won't even allow their husbands or boyfriends to look twice at another woman in their presence without confronting him.

Now poster, grant his honourable request..

Are you guys perfectly okay?

This sounds like you guys are just being friends with benefits. If you are truly dating then you both are big jokers!

Is either something is wrong with 2 of u or u ppl ar wrong. Hey No. Any marriage or lationship that Jealous is not they dt means there is no love is just like when we say one nigeria and still say state of origin that mean we ar nt one so d 2 of u ar just playing games if u love it dt way why u go they come worry us here? U ppl should wake up now after u don go mess up u go com they look 4 ppl to advice u on d story dt touch ar u blind dnt u knw wht u want? Chai I dey vex.

This is boldness!

Sophyrocks: Op, tell your hubby that you will allow him to have a fling only when he allows you to have one too. In other words, you guys should opt for an open marriage. Problem solved.

O.k, let me be serious. i think your hubby is not used to staying with only one woman at a time or has never being faithful to any lady he has dated before you and has never being faithful to you. Now what i am amazed at is the level of tolerance you have shown towards this attitude. I feel you gave him so much freedom, that he translated it to having side chicks while dating you. But you chose to turn a blind eye to it in the name of 'Giving him his space because he is a Man'. Dnt get me wrong. A man needs his space BUT NOT the kind of space where he is free to keep side chicks and become unfaithful. No man would ever allow that from a woman. Now he saw how comfortable you were with his lifestyle and so had the AUDACITY to ask you to your face if you can allow him to have flings!!
A man can never have the audacity to ask you of such if you have never shown that you are o.k with it.

As for your question, I CAN NEVER allow flings in my marriage. I WILL NEVER MARRY A MAN WHO REASONS THIS WAY. I can never marry a man whose lifestyle is this way. Flings in a marriage is an evidence that something is wrong with that marriage.

babe u rock ; I luv u for that

OP I have no advice for you.
Just be prepared for 3somess.
You guys can enjoy life to the fullest and have all your sex parties in your matrimonial bed
You know the bring-a-date kind of party.
You bring your bf and he brings his gf.
Parryy all de way

YES

Pls babe don't try to allow him cuz wen he enters into that freedom he will missuse it . Ask him this question if he can allow u to do the same.

God forbid, I don't believe in having space or privacy in any serious relationship, i don't allow my gf give me space and she doesn't allow me give her space, no privacy and d love and respect is so strong. My conscience can never allow me think of anything concerning ordinary flirt or fling, so op, any guy who acts in such a manner is not serious and u sound unseriös somehow.

For what na?

Is she mad? Am I mad? Are we mad?

@Op...... This must be a scene in one of our NOllywood movie........ No mature mind can indulge in such acts or consent to that.

Is he the same cheating boy friend here ? : https://www.nairaland.com/1351604/how-handle-cheating-boyfrend

kamdyjenny: Pls oohh I nid ur suggestions nd advice here. Am som1 dat loves to give a man some space nd then letting him do wat he wants. Bt trust me I cld be a great detector. I cld monitor everytin u do( I do dis stlyishly coz I dnt want to be called posseive). Now its rather very hard for my guy to cheat on me witout me finding out. Very hard! Coz I must. Ok now listen d last time I caught him cheating on me was 6months ago. I was outa of town for 1week nd He brought a gurl home. Ok wen I came bk it took me jst 2wiks nd I found out he was with som1. I confronted him,normaly he wld want to lie bt lata he said d truth and confessed hw wveytin happened. He said it was jst a mere fling. Ok! Now we where chatting normally some days bk, nd he was lyk can I let him have a fling? Dats is I wld be aware dat he is som woman nd won't complain, my first amswer was a sounding NO! So he went ahead to say he does nt want to kip lying to me anymore coz one lie begets plenty lies. Nd wants to tell him wen he is having a fling wit a gurl. Abeg oohh matured guys nd gurls. Wat do u tink abt dis. I prefer answers from matured minds. Wld u let ur spouse flirt??

Read the writing on the wall! Guys that are serious with their Gf/spouse seldom cheat on them, and when they do they keep it as a bad secret cause they don't want to lose their woman. This dude doesn't care about losing you! Am not a dooms day Prophet,but he would eventually leave. I only tell girls about other girls I straff/flirt with when I really don't care abt losing them. BTW, Ask him if he doesn't mind you flirting or cheating, If he says he doesn't mind, better quit the Rel before you get burnt.

@OP,
Are you married? If No then you are just another fling to him-a regular one-If Yes then something is wrong somewhere.
Either ways,trouble looms...

Truth is : you dont av a spouse yet!

Op,you are very stupid. So in your funny head you can even tolerate that asshole to proudly tell you he wants to have a fling?Are you that cheap?And to imagine that you are asking for advise over whether a man who cheated on you to now cheat with your consent shows the lowhead you are.

In a relationship between two adults,love rules and cheating is such a grave act that will end it. A woman with pride will be gone from that guy,not asking advise on letting him cheat more.

Many men cheat and do so intelligently so that their babes will never know;yours cheats,justifies it and wants to now do it with your consent. The two of you are sick.

__________