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Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 1:07pm On Aug 10, 2016 |
where can i start from. okay. i just know i belong here. Am a VERY shy person and an EXTREME introvert. my parents are introverts but not shy though. I think that's where my nature came from coupled with upbringing we weren't allowed by my parents to mingle. Always indoors. This really affected me greatly. Also introversion runs in my family as all my sibling are introverts too. Funny enough any where i go am always given leadership positions,don't know why? i guess its because of my cool nature, but usually i reject some of the positions because am shy to perform. At home or with few people am familiar(i dont have close friends) they see me as out spoken and fun to be with. But the major challenge i have as an introvert is i cant face crowd. In church i cant come out to testify, or join any group etc. When i was in school, i couldnt ask questions in class or make presentations etc. it was just so bad mehn. Now am in my late 20s but still shy. Well, i can say shyness as robbed me of a lot of things in life. i really do wish i wasn't shy. i have tried to change but it hasn't been successful may be because its naturally my god-given nature. i don't know ? Forgive my long and boring post. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Aremu01(m): 2:21pm On Aug 10, 2016 |
shapeey: The emboldened is really sad. I think you just gotta start forcing yourself to do things you normally will not do Jus like someone advised me... It's all voices in your head... Shut it out n do what you gotta do.... It ll be bad to look back later in life n regret about the things you should have done but shyness robbed you. My parents too are introvert, I think that's y I got my nature as well, I silently blame them but ain't dr fault also.... Lemme leave u with this... HE hasn't given you the spirit of fear but of....... #peace 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by misterh(m): 11:29am On Aug 11, 2016 |
Hello everyone! Came across this thread some months ago but haven't been active. As an introvert, it's usually hard for me to initiate conversations. I was in a wedding ceremony in June with an extremely extrovert friend. Dude was chatting away and making friends. I was stuck with a lady who I wanted to converse with but I didn't know how to initiate. Such thing happened a few weeks later at another wedding. Concerning maintaining eye contact, this is an aspect of me that I've just developed recently. I just let my gaze wander around the other person's face. So, I am getting there. Talking in public has always been herculean. But I discovered that I really enjoy talking in public once I know the subject very well. I've just been appointed the president of a student association and this requires talking in public with eyes on me and making on the spot decisions. I can't afford to fail. Recently, I just discovered that my 11 year old sister exhibits traits of introversion. I had a discussion with her sharing my own experiences when I was her age. I'll monitor her and provide a listening ear. 2 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 3:43pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
.....I just finally finished reading the 89 pages and I was like . I don't know how to explain it. My personality is a bit skewered. I grew up in a noisy environment but I really loved books and puzzles, when I was young. I remember a time when my mother actually took me to the Doctor once because she was scared I had speech problem . I was the type of guy that likes to sit at the back in class, and say nothing. Unfortunately, teachers used to misplace that silence for dumbness and resort to asking me a load of questions. When I answered them(correctly); they then tried to force me to sit in front and make me head projects and competition . Really annoying. I also have the crazy sense of humour. I tell crazy jokes to my friend and they laugh like hell but in crowds, it's like my mouth seize and my brain is suddenly back to the middle age era. That shii sucks. My friends usually "steal" my jokes and tell it to get girls; but I don't mind. Just because I'm shy doesn't mean they should be. I'm also really sarcastic. At times, when I work up the nerve to talk in a crowded place, I make some really sarcastic comments. My guys understand of course; but the ladies there always feel I'm making fun of them and turn cold. Like seriously And surpisingly, people misread my shyness for arrogance . My friends tell me that, before we became friends, they thought I was arrogant! A lot of times I've met female friends who say "they told me you were arrogant" and I'm like no, for chrissake I'm just shy!!! However, when I'm in a debate with someone or I'm solving a problem; I forget everything and I flow perfectly but when the debate ends or the problem is solved; the conversation peters out and I start becoming as verbally clumsy as a 750 kg elephant trying to walk on a tightrope What's even more weird is that my friends see as some type of guru. They ask me any question at all from "what's the name of the nearest star" to "who wrote game of throne book sef". As if I'm google And I'm also a biblophile. I like books. I adore them. Nothing makes me happier than diving into someone else's imagination. I have a very very vivid imagination myself. I've once spent my last 6k on buying a novel that I didn't even read I also have a strong sense of empathy.....and a very low level of emotion. I take bad news the same way as good news but I feel like I understand other peoples emotional state; and how to react myself. This shii has let people call me "cold" I am actually a sort of a nerd; most of my happiest moments comes when I'm reading a complicated topic; or finally solving a problem; or actually just when I'm alone; listening to music with no one to disturb me, no uncomfortable stares, no societial pressure. Just me.....myself......and I. I actually don't write posts like this because it's narcisstic as hell but hey I'll make an exception i guess I guess that's most of my boring life. Ciao. 10 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Akposb(m): 7:37pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
SirWere your name is quite apt from what you described. I can actually relate to the no talking but intelligent type, lover of books but above all welcome to this lounge. 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by drippingink3: 11:07pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
Want to punish an introvert, take him out of his comfort zone. |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by whitecloth: 5:42am On Aug 12, 2016 |
Olarewajub:Hi Olarewajub. Kudos to the job well done on this thread, you once shares the link to Susan Cain books on the power of being quiet or something like that, pls can you share it again, and if you know other books also, kindly share as much as possible. Thanks. 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 8:10am On Aug 12, 2016 |
whitecloth: Welcome bro Link => http://tinyurl .com/hg24crt Just remove the space between url and the rest of the link and search. |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Aremu01(m): 8:37am On Aug 12, 2016 |
drippingink3:LOL u re right 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by charley94: 12:28pm On Aug 12, 2016 |
drippingink3:becomes like fish out of water |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by drippingink3: 9:19pm On Aug 13, 2016 |
I am afraid of the day someone would make me angry. |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Krasid(m): 9:39pm On Aug 13, 2016 |
drippingink3:Introverts rarely get angry unless they are pushed to the wall.If I may ask, what would happen if someone did get you angry? |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by whitecloth: 12:58am On Aug 14, 2016 |
GloryIsaac:Thanks a lot |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 6:42am On Aug 14, 2016 |
whitecloth:Your Welcome |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by drippingink3: 2:57pm On Aug 14, 2016 |
Krasid: I use to wonder if am alright or if am a going to be a serial killer. Things use to happen to me and I would be indifferent about it. It is other people that would be showing concern. Am bothered about the fact that i don't get angry easily, I feel like a bomb that would explode at anytime. 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by drippingink3: 3:18pm On Aug 14, 2016 |
There was one incident of someone provoking me. I remember what the boy did me but i all i know was that i was angry. I remember gripping the boy by the neck and fall him to the ground and pinned him there. I was about punching the guy when started shouting sorry. The anger just left me, I could not punch him again. 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by drippingink3: 3:22pm On Aug 14, 2016 |
I'm afraid one day i won't be able to control myself since i don't have enough practice. |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Sard(m): 6:59pm On Aug 14, 2016 |
drippingink3:You need to manage your anger as poor anger management could lead you to a land of no return. Getting angry is normal; however, being unable to control it is abnormal. I would suggest you learn to walk away when you're angry as this will allow you get over your anger without misbehaving. You can also get and read some of the books written on anger management. You need to help yourself before things get out of hands. 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Lsofdk(m): 7:33pm On Aug 15, 2016 |
GloryIsaac:you too let me register my presence |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Lsofdk(m): 7:33pm On Aug 15, 2016 |
GloryIsaac:you too let me register my presence |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 8:03pm On Aug 15, 2016 |
drippingink3:.... It's a common thing Bro. I'm guessing you don't like controversy. So you go around minding your business......until some slowpoke decides to be personally aggravating I get that anger too sometimes, especially when the person is right in your face and is doing stupid stuff. The "reasonable" advice will be to avoid them, always stay cool and calm, avoid situations like that and errr..... all that stuff. Instead I'll advice you to actually let out your feelings. yes. Shout, level accusations, behave irrationally and err....... you get the gist The break in character will actually shock and convince the person that you're serious and will probably make the person stop being annoying And if that fails, you can always get guys to capture the person and BEAT him and TORTURE him and err....... Actually don't do that ooo...... Just....avoid him/her 2 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Melsan: 9:01pm On Aug 15, 2016 |
@Sir were,bought a 6k book and didn't read? ,introverts are really amazing creatures a bit difficult to understand,lol! 2 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Nobody: 1:00am On Aug 16, 2016 |
Lsofdk:Haha ... Welcome to the lounge brother 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by drippingink3: 7:31am On Aug 17, 2016 |
Sard: The problem is not that I can't control my anger, I just afraid that since I don't get angry easily I won't be able to control myself when someone unlock my tap to the fullest and since I don't know the quantity my tank contains there my be problem especially when I get married. |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by drippingink3: 7:35am On Aug 17, 2016 |
SirWere: The last time I tried something like that I did it wrong and I felt guilty because it was not 'me', if you get what I mean. I had to apologized to the person. 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by drippingink3: 7:10pm On Aug 17, 2016 |
It was a result of my cousins telling me that people would take advantage of me because i don't talk. So when one man came and took my chair thinking it's his own and then refusing even after i told him and showed him who took his chair, i talked carelessly, forgetting the guy senior me. In my mind, i remember one nigeria film where the main character was pompous and talking anyhow to his ring leader to be. Even after talking carelessly, the ring leader said he liked the guy. So I was thinking, after i have given this guy a piece of my mind, he will like me and we may even be best of friends. My ranting didn't make him stand. I challenge the guy that was sitting next to him when he told me i was talking to my senior. Asking him so because he his my senior he should take my chair. After I calmed down, my conscience started pricking me. One of my cousin now told me that he was shocked at my behaviour, that i was wrong. I couldn't sit comfortably again. I asked him to follow me to apologized to the guy. 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by drippingink3: 7:15pm On Aug 17, 2016 |
That day i learnt you can't change over night. If you force yourself to do the things that are not part of you make up suddenly, you would do it the wrong way and it would be disasterous. I forgot that even if you want to say your mind you should do it respectfully. Calm speech win over captains. 4 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Olarewajub: 7:22pm On Aug 17, 2016 |
How to change the world as an Introvert https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F09ZQiytlkU&itct=CBYQpDAYACITCN6x9oyHyc4CFQoPHAodfU8HqlIsaW50cm92ZXJ0IHdheSBvZiBjaGFuZ2luZyB0aGUgd29ybGQgdGVkIHRhbGs%3D&hl=en&gl=NG&client=mv-google |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Peachess(f): 10:44pm On Aug 17, 2016 |
[b] Phew! Finally (I've been trying join you guys but I always stop immediately I start writing), I don't even know where to start from. I'm a very shy person. I'm always indoors but most times I wanna go out and talk to people and have fun. Each time I try to go out it's like something keeps pulling me back. Most places I go to people wanna get close to me but I avoid them cos I'm extremely shy and I end up being tagged a snob and proud person too. Most times when people talk I have Ideas on what they are discussing and I really wanna join them but I don't always have the courage to join them. Before I used to dread talking to the opposite sex and most people use to to mistake it for 'forming'. I used to be very nervous, start stuttering and sometimes make grammatical blunders (lol). Now I still feel nervous when around them but not like before. Every times I tell myself I want to change and start talking to anyone even if they don't talk first but each time I try, I can't do it for more than two days I'll go back to my normal self. I read meaning to every action people take and it turns out right and sometimes wrong. I cant make friends easily because I don't trust and I'm not free with people but when I do, I trust too much and become too free with them. My friends call me crazy and sometimes ask me why am different outside but I always don't have answers cos it puzzles me to. I just wanna be outspoken, I'm a lot different on the internet still reserved but I talk to almost everyone. Is there any way I can get out of being an extreme introvert? Or any tip to help me out of my shy nature? [/b] 4 Likes |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by innovestor(m): 3:54am On Aug 18, 2016 |
[size=14pt]I am an extrovertial introvert. Can i also join this group??[/size] 1 Like |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Yoyostic: 11:42am On Aug 18, 2016 |
I used to be an extreme introvert but i'm been through a lot in life.People usually take advantage of me and all that.some feel I'm arrogant,especially my in laws.Now i'm trying to force myself out of my shell.I know i've really changed now. |
Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Akposb(m): 8:13pm On Aug 18, 2016 |
Peachess you ain't different from most who have visited this thread and let me welcome you on behalf of the others. You said your major problem is being shy and the opposite is being confident. You have to address those disturbing thoughts that makes you to feel out of place or inferior to others. I smile and laugh a lot and people tend to take me for granted hence I have reduced that smiley aspect of me. I just hope you curtail your shyness so it does not rob you of opportunities now and in the future. Just be free to express yourself and be willing to look at people with confidence. 4 Likes |
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