sexyseun: The truth is even though majority of us here criticize it, over half of unmarried couple cohabitate. I remember when i was in school i was living with my BF, staying with him gave me a sense of direction as he was a serious and focused guy, Damn!!! that guy get principle sha.. we would wake together, pray together, go to the library together, he fixes my assignments, he advices me, he was like my elder brother,i couldnt even think of cheating on him because i had it going well, as soon as he graduated things changed and then i became SEXYSEUN.
My point is, it all boils down to the individual you are cohabitating with, marriage doesnt change anybody its just a way of telling people officially that we are cohabitating for life. I have got many couple who initially lived together and ended up as lovely husband and wife and same i had couple who went straight into marriage(after normal dating iissh) and now headed for divorce
It all boils down to what you both decide and not Nairalander's comments

Chrisbenogor: There's really no guarantee on what will give a good marriage. It takes two willing people to tango.
That being said I think it depends on the maturity of the couple involved. Living together can be a reminder of what will be when you tie the knot. I think one might lose the excitement of being a newly wedded couple but in its place you would have gone through the teething problems that some early marriages go through. There's no more surprise, you learn quickly that sex life in marriage for instance is far from the occasional hormone filled hook ups you have.If two mature people feel like they are mentally strong enough to handle it or they already almost spend a lot of time together then why not?

sexyseun: you suppose knw na

ayoku777:

As a christian, Christ and the scriptures should be our standard for defining what is good. We just don't ask if something is good, but also if it is godly. Godly is the believers' definition of "good". And scripturally, having a "live-in" lover is wrong.

Even Jesus Christ that has paid the ultimate price for His bride, the church, with His life, and has given her the earnest of the Spirit (first gift of commitment); has not brought her home yet. They are not yet living together bodily.

It is after the wedding feast of the lamb, that Christ and His church will officially live and be together bodily through the milenial and for eternity.

I believe its best to learn the values of marriage from the one who instituted it in the first place -God; and not from what society deems acceptable now.

So living together with a partner, even a fiancé is wrong and not godly.

Imoy:
So would u prefer d girl sits and watch her bf or husband to be washing the clothes, plates and probably cooking in the name of not turning his to be wife a house maid?


How some nigerian girls think.....



Until u change dis ur mentality no Nigerian man go gree marry u, except u go marry oyinbo wey d marriage no go pass 3yrs.

bustyhelen: Not a good idea at all. But spending the week end in his place occasionally may be OK.Than live-in-lovers.

Some as they live together, d babe may get pregnant once or twice and the man may cajole her to evacuate the stuff, and she may oblige him to answer a "loyal" wife to b. After he may throw her out and find one flimsy excuse like "my mama said I can't marry outside my tribe".

hahahahahahaha

sisters shine ur eyes ooooo

bustyhelen: Not a good idea at all. But spending the week end in his place occasionally may be OK.Than live-in-lovers.

Some as they live together, d babe may get pregnant once or twice and the man may cajole her to evacuate the stuff, and she may oblige him to answer a "loyal" wife to b. After he may throw her out and find one flimsy excuse like "my mama said I can't marry outside my tribe".

hahahahahahaha

sisters shine ur eyes ooooo

sexyseun: oh please!! Let me tell you a good story, my dad traveled to the Uk before inviting my mum to come stay with him, they stayed together for 2years before they finally tied the knot, would you say my mum was foolish or he was a punk-ass? Like i said earlier it all depends on the individual and their intent

ideology:

Oga, if this is true, what does the bible mean when it's written, when Jesus Died, we died with him, when he rose, we rose together with him.

ideology:
What do u mean by wedding feast of lamb and which place can one find same in the holy book

oyihou: Traditional Marriage is the most potent and powerful type of marriage in Africa. If the MAN HAS PAID HER BRIDE PRICE THEN THEY ARE HUSBAND AND WIFE.

So if a lady is ashamed of the custom and tradition of her people and her land, she can go ahead and do court marriage.

But from where i hail from if you like go and do court MARRIAGE without the traditional marriage you are not regarded as a married person according to the tradition of my beloved lineage.

No matter where i find myself i will never abandone my culture because of a BORROWED CULTURE from another NATION

I SHALL FOLLOW THE FOOTSTEP OF MY LINEAGE/ FORE FATHERS NO MATTER WHAT.

ayoku777:


You're very correct, we did die and rise with Him. Even so, it doesn't mean Christ and His church are together bodily now. Ofcourse not. The bridegroom has been taken away and we won't have His physical presence again until the millenial.

Christ is with His Church in Spirit and christians who have died and gone to heaven are also with Christ in spirit. But Christ and His church are not and will not be together bodily until the millenial.

We need to separate Legal truths from literal truths, and spiritual realities from physical realities in scripture.

That we died and rose in Christ and are seated with Him right now is a legal truth and a spiritual reality. But physically speaking, the bridegroom and His bride are not yet together. The bride is still waiting for Him.

Revelation 22v17 -And the Spirit and the bride say, COME.



Rev 19v7 -Let us be glad and rejoice, and give honour to Him: for THE MARRIAGE OF THE LAMB is come, and His wife hath made hersellf ready.

Rev 19v9 -And He saith unto me, Write, Blessed are they which are called unto THE MARRIAGE SUPPER OF THE LAMB. And he saith unto me, These are the true sayings of God.

9jahubcom: some dont stay together, but na dey make love pass (S*x) for any opportunity..wetin una go call dat one

Ezeanna: I am in support of cohabitation Only IF the main idea is to find out the compatibility of the couple involved. Better a broken relationship than a broken marriage.

Though i would advice that some ground rules be established. Like;

1. The couple must have dated for at least three months before deciding to cohabit.
2. They must be engaged and the main reason for the cohabitation is to find out how suited they are for marriage in order to avoid jumping in and jumping out of marriage; because that would be a painful experience.
3. The cohabitation must have a time frame. It must not exceed three months.
4. No sex during the period of cohabitation. I don't see the point in trying to make a baby when you aren't sure yet if you want to spend your life with the person. A baby ties two people together whether they want it or not.

#Mytwocents#

jmoore: If you are against premarital sex then you should be against cohabitation.

How can you be "chopping" the forbidden fruit outside and you are against cohabitation?

How can you support cohabitation, and you are against premarital sex? Are you learner?

ideology:

Good, but In truth, God is spirit, and man is a spirit being too.

How is it possible that we died with him?

Remember Jesus Had communion with the disciples before he died, what's the significance?

what happens to the spirit of Man, when He's worshipping God?

Why did Jesus Say, by just thinking about sex, you have fornicated already?

MOBBDEEP:



Hmm, I didn't want to comment before until I saw these posts.
At least, the 2 of you were a bit objective.
People just facetiously condemn a situation, an event or act with no facts except the delusions of religion & norms, some of which ought to be scrutinized deeply to determine its essence.
After all, has the religion & norms helped in the advancement of humanity?
I'd say, with some measure of certainty, no!

This is a gray area with its pros & cons.
I remembered reading some researched papers presenting some surprising & fascinating facts about cohabitation ( can't provide link for those who would requested because it was a part of a big Psychology textbook ) :
* Divorce/Separation rate was lower among cohabiting couples compared with those who married straight in the 1st 5yrs of marriage.
* Adaptability, survival strength & maturation of characters were better among there cohabiting partners supposedly.
* It brings about stability & better support for people involve which translated to being a bit happier in reality.
Now, there will be a lot exceptions.

I'm not supporting cohabitation.
It's just that I want us to be balanced in evaluation of our beliefs & behaviours.
FEW THINGS in life & reality are OUTRIGHT COMPLETE GOOD/BAD.

And as they say, this is one of the dimensions of life where no particular route/way/belief system works for all.
Co-habitation will be inimical to some people's existence just as it brings bliss for many.
Some also have had it rough & unpleasant with starting out straight.

It seems to me that what matters most is the set of people involved.
If the people involved are supposedly GOOD (now, this is a broad definition), whatever system they use works for them. Be it cohabitation, straight-marriage, celibacy, asexual etc.
So, rather than focus on the system, we centre on the people involve.

By the way, I sense a lot of people saying bad about the cohabitation are being hypocritical.
Àbí, who are the cohabiting couples you & me see everyday?
Are they aliens? Or they don't use IT?

MOBBDEEP:



Hmm, I didn't want to comment before until I saw these posts.
At least, the 2 of you were a bit objective.
People just facetiously condemn a situation, an event or act with no facts except the delusions of religion & norms, some of which ought to be scrutinized deeply to determine its essence.
After all, has the religion & norms helped in the advancement of humanity?
I'd say, with some measure of certainty, no!

This is a gray area with its pros & cons.
I remembered reading some researched papers presenting some surprising & fascinating facts about cohabitation ( can't provide link for those who would requested because it was a part of a big Psychology textbook ) :
* Divorce/Separation rate was lower among cohabiting couples compared with those who married straight in the 1st 5yrs of marriage.
* Adaptability, survival strength & maturation of characters were better among there cohabiting partners supposedly.
* It brings about stability & better support for people involve which translated to being a bit happier in reality.
Now, there will be a lot exceptions.

I'm not supporting cohabitation.
It's just that I want us to be balanced in evaluation of our beliefs & behaviours.
FEW THINGS in life & reality are OUTRIGHT COMPLETE GOOD/BAD.

And as they say, this is one of the dimensions of life where no particular route/way/belief system works for all.
Co-habitation will be inimical to some people's existence just as it brings bliss for many.
Some also have had it rough & unpleasant with starting out straight.

It seems to me that what matters most is the set of people involved.
If the people involved are supposedly GOOD (now, this is a broad definition), whatever system they use works for them. Be it cohabitation, straight-marriage, celibacy, asexual etc.
So, rather than focus on the system, we centre on the people involve.

By the way, I sense a lot of people saying bad about the cohabitation are being hypocritical.
Àbí, who are the cohabiting couples you & me see everyday?
Are they aliens? Or they don't use IT?

ideology: We are promoting sex than it should,
Must they have sex?
what happens to a married man, during 9months when the wife his pregnant, even few weeks after child birth.

Discipline and control yourself

oliviastacey: ha! nawa oh. 9 months. husbands sex their preg wives jare! r u a leaner?

Elantracey: For me am totally against it , I don't need to live with you first before I can get to know some things I can't cope with about you , moreover you can never know someone completely , we are going to be spending our entire life together so why the rush , it's more irritating when the girl turns to his house maid , washing clothes and all that .