Police in lagos had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn't control himself during a lineup.

When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words, "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the man shouted, "That's not what I said!"

lol
nice one tyty

tnx clem

lol that must be gab and slyve

u gat it

I went to the store the other day, I was only in there for about 5 minutes and when I came out there was a motorcycle cop writing a parking ticket. So I went up to him and said, "Come on buddy, howabout giving a guy a break?"

He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. So I called him a pencil necked tyrant. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having bald tires!

So I called him a horse's rear end. He finished the second ticket and put it on the car with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket!

This went on for about 20 minutes, the more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote.

I didn't give a darn. My car was parked around the corner.

bad boi

tintinrayor!!

moyon, welkum toady

lol
fire on!!

i be fire for fire?

wait. . **fetches sand**

Why yo go fetch sand like a puppy dog now?

dont mind the bingo

lmao
i love this waiter jokes

tylope bawo ni jarr

F'SHIP IS NOT COLLECTION OF HEART
BUT IT IS SELECTION OF HEART
ALL FRIEND ARE NOT TRUE
BUT TRUE FRIEND ARE VERY FEW
AND I ALWAYS LIKE YOU, ask the GOD to
Always protects you and bless you:



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./¨ ¨\ /.¨¨¨¨¨friend.¨¨¨¨¨¨¨.\¨ ¨/ ¨ \
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gabrywyl:

Why yo go fetch sand like a puppy dog now?

aww. . u got mi a puppy

clemcykul:

don't mind the bingo

u don turn to bingo?. . awww, pele oO

A young woman took her troubles to a psychiatrist. "Doctor, you must help me," she pleaded. "It's gotten so that every time I date a nice guy, I end up in bed with him. And then afterward, I feel guilty and depressed for a week."

"I see," nodded the psychiatrist. "And you, no doubt, want me to strengthen your will power and resolve in this matter."

"For God's sake, NO!" exclaimed the woman. "I want you to fix it so I won't feel guilty and depressed afterward."

A woman was driving her old beat up car on the Highway with her 7 year old son. She tried to keep up with traffic but they were flying by her.

After getting caught in a large group of cars flying down the road, she looked at her speedometer to see she was doing 15 miles over the speed limit. Slowing down, she moved over to the side and got out of the clump that soon left her behind.

She looked up and saw the flashing lights of a police car. Pulling over she waited for the officer to come up to her car.

As he did he said, "Ma'am do you know why I pulled you over?"

Her son piped up from the back seat, "I do, because you couldn't catch the other cars!"

An 80 year old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them. When they arrived at the doctors, they explained to the doctor about the problems they were having with their memory.

After checking the couple out, the doctor told them that they were physically okay but might want to start writing things down and make notes to help them remember things. The couple thanked the doctor and left.

Later that night while watching TV, the man got up from his chair and his wife asked, "Where are you going?"

He replied, "To the kitchen."

She asked, "Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"

He replied, "Sure."

She then asked him, "Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?"

He said, "No, I can remember that."

She then said, "Well I would also like some strawberries on top. You had better write that down because I know you'll forget that."

He said, "I can remember that, you want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries."

She replied, "Well I also would like whipped cream on top. I know you will forget that so you better write it down."

With irritation in his voice, he said, "I don't need to write that down! I can remember that." He then fumes into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes he returned from the kitchen and handed her a plate of bacon and eggs.

She stared at the plate for a moment and said angrily: "I TOLD you to write it down! You forgot my toast!"

nice jokes

welkum bak,hw was ur exam

thanks, my test was just 0K!
how're u?

i dey o, wish u gud luck sha in ur txt

ololumi hold clemxy for me, he has stolen the money i wanted to give you to buy agoi ( beans ) for spenky.

*hey, emu, ole ni, oti ji owo ti mo fe fi ra ewa agoi fun spenky*