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Must I Befriend My Husband Mistress Before There Will Be Peace In My Home? / Dehinde Fernandez Mistress, Halima Buries Him In Belgium - Akinsco28 / Should A Wife Confront The Husband's Mistress? (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Confronting The Mistress by pickabeau1: 2:04pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Ok.... i understand you.. mind games work BUT not on everyone and definitelt not everytime The question is how effective will the mind games be? The issue is there festering what if he gets tired and calls your bluff and runs to the arms of the other woman edwife: 1 Like |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by sheunfemix: 2:06pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
edwife:we all know what a woman can do. No need for details jaRe. If we can throw fits and tantrum ova small things. Even playing nice will be torment |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by edwife(f): 2:06pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
sheunfemix: |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Kimoni: 2:08pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
coogar: That level of discourtesy is what some men are not capable of. And it's not like they are interested or giving mixed signals but they just don't have that venom inside them to spit out. And here you have a firebrand for a wife who is watching all this. for how long can she hold herself and not react? Imagine reading all the chats, seeing the phone ring severally through the night? |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Kimoni: 2:11pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
aisha2: It's good news to hear a stalker case that was rightly addressed but I still have my doubts as to how many men will report a female admirer turned stalker or how well the case will be treated in most police stations. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Nobody: 2:14pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Kimoni: Kimoni: Maybe because we have adopted a culture of taking laws into our hands. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Nobody: 2:15pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
aisha2: Exactly. Once you start to fight for an adult, it means you never deserved him/her in the first place. If he really values what we have, he will ward off temptatons the same way he expects me to ward temptations. Thats where self respect comes in. He has his own responsibility while i have mine. Everyone carries their own load. 3 Likes |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by coogar: 2:17pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Kimoni: excellent point! most men don't just have that venom in them to tell a woman off. we were mostly trained to chase & not to be chased. it's not really a familiar territory for the men....
that's a different case entirely. just because a man is reluctant to unleash venom on an admirer of the opposite sėx doesn't mean she should disrespect the wife at home by calling at odd hours, sending sassy messages or disturbing images.... the husband shouldn't condone such. she has to be kept at arm's length & if the stalking persists then maybe the police should be involved. a woman camped outside ramsey nouah's house for 3 days claiming God told her she should be his wife....it was after the 3rd day police were involved to drive the woman away. 3 days & 3 nights?? it got me thinking - would a man have been allowed to stay there for 3 days if he was stalking a wife? a typical naija wife would have boiled a bucket of water mixed with pepper & pour it on him. 1 Like |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by edwife(f): 2:17pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
pickabeau1: What will he be tired of?I did not disturb or nag him did i?So what will he be tired of? And if he choose to go back in her arms,does it not say something? HE DOES NOT WANT YOU ANYMORE.... simple.... Question is,will I be meeting him often in that scenario?and will i always play cool all the time?....NO.... Differents situations call for different measures..... |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Nobody: 2:20pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Kimoni: Sincerely, a stalker cannot continue to stalk for long especially when you have shown to be steadfast, unmovable, disciplined and consistent in your stance!! How jobless can one be to keep stalking another? Once a man lets his wife know and they botth come together to ward off temptations, they will come out victorious! if a man is that weak like a puppet, let him let his wife know o. However they choose to handle it is up to them. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by pickabeau1: 2:21pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Exactly.. you did not nag You were quiet He is scared you are going to murder him in sleep or poison Mind games can be risky At bolded... that is the meatof this thread What will u do... when u dont want to play cool handcuffs? edwife: |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Kimoni: 2:25pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Sophyrocks: Point 1 - the assumption is that he told his wife. check my comments to Aisha on the police angle. In addresssing point 2 - That the man is guilty and should be dealt with is in no doubt here. I said confronting the mistress where she has no knowledge the man is married can achieve something if the mistress is moral enough to end the relationship. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by edwife(f): 2:25pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
pickabeau1: Nooo,he should just keep it in his trouser next time..... @bolded ahahahah You don't wanna know,do you? At least you won't hear it from me..... |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by pickabeau1: 2:30pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Yes he should... thats the best You ladies are keeping quiet but always making veiled threats.. Only sheun has said her one clearly Playing it cool online eh??[ meanwhileyou guys love una hubby I put it t you,... u will raise fire and brimstone on that womans head Then deal with hubby and make him straight and narrow edwife: |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by peggykorol(f): 2:31pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
So there is a grown man out there who can't resist the chase of a small girl? Story for the gods I never believe any man who claims girls are the ones chasing him? Your hubby is not a toddler nah Giving the mistress attention makes her feel she has an upper hand I have had to call a girl once and I looked like an fo0l after that It's painful when a man misbehaves but then you have no business with the mistress |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by TV01(m): 2:34pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Kimoni:At that point she is not a "mistress" - just a shameless heffer ! If wifey is confident putting her in her place if an opportune moment arises, why not? I'd still prefer the man to be quite firm in rebuking her - and calling the authorities if need be. @OP Aisha 2 & Bukatyne covered off most of what I wanted to say. I'd add these three points as to why a wife shouldn't 1. The mistress may be a black-belt in some oriental fightin style - or simply bigger, stronger and more visous than the wife. 2. She may not actually be "the mistress" in question - mistaken identity - or know he's married? 3. A weaker one - but it may actually be over and she may have repented TV |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Kimoni: 2:35pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
coogar: Coogar but it's not a different case now, a mistress that is bent on having a man will call severally, send him endless nude pictures, send him flowers, you know how women do these things, shouldn't the wife step in at this stage? 3 days and 3 nights outside my house? Na OPC go shoot the man accidentally |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by edwife(f): 2:36pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
pickabeau1: ahahaha ,you crazy... Anyone who knows me,will tell you i don't do physical....especially not with the other woman,no no no.... As for my man,make him straight and narrow,depends on where.... Truth is if it is once,i will overlook and ready for a clean start,but that's all i can promise.... |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Nobody: 2:40pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Kimoni: Point 1 taken. Point 2, Nope. You dnt solve a problem from the top. You solve it from the root. The root of the problem in this case is that the man never mentioned he was married. Have you asked yourself why a man would DELIBERATELY hide his marital status? Why would he do that? Is he not the source of the problem? A wise woman would deal with that problem head on so that the useless man will not continue to deceive other single women. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by edwife(f): 2:41pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Sophyrocks: Simple.... Those girls,don't like it when they know the man told his wife about them,they lose interest.It 's like they have been overpowered...They no longer have control.... |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by bukatyne(f): 2:42pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Kimoni: Wait o, Someone wants you to put your hand inside fire... if there an amount of pleading that will make you put your hand in the fire? Why would a woman keep stalking a man when he shows no interest persistently? Even guys back off a girl after her not giving them face repeatedly. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Nobody: 2:43pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
edwife: You are I know this is very far from the truth. Unless you already know about the mistress, so its no longer a big deal. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by pickabeau1: 2:45pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Cool.... So all this hard women things na just online formings..... ... edwife: |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Kimoni: 2:45pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
TV01: Agree, at that point, she is something else but still a potential threat to the marriage. Your second point is what i am driving at. Agree with their points too but where I disagree is where you put blanket over it by saying a wife is never ever justified in confronting the mistress or potential threat as the case may be. It's not advisable in most cases but in some scenarios, it might just be the way out. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Nobody: 2:49pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
edwife: Of course. Most ladies you see around married men brragging about is as a result of the ffact that the men have given them so much power and guts to break homes. Seriously, if a man respects his wife, he will not cheat on her let alone give a mistress so much power over their marriage. Everything depends on the man and not the mistress. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Nobody: 2:51pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
bukatyne: There are stalkers ohhhhh. Please lets not make the assumption that its only when you give them attention they stay. Stalkers have a sickness they twist reality. I had one, it was bad, never showed him the slightest interest but he had already made me his wife in his mind and had named our kids. Will call me 20 times first thing in the morning followed by a barrage of text messages, threaten to come to my hosue, my office send me pictures of myself, my family etc. It was bad. People laughed it off and said the guy was in "Love". I however reported to the Security agencies and he was invited after sending some threats asked to write never to contact me again. Watch channel 171 there is a special program on stalking and stalkers. A man stalked a couple claiming to be their son infact almost killed them. Stalking is bad and dangerous, has nothing to do with the victim giving attention or lack of it |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by edwife(f): 2:52pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Nashville: I kid you not.... Not everyone was born with an iron arm or fighting skills... We do have differents ways of fighting.... I love my life so much as to involve myself in something that will probably affect my vision or leave me with a scar..... Ain't the husband coming back home? |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Nobody: 2:53pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Sophyrocks: So the mistress is not doing any wrong. It seems we are giving these daughters of jezebel a free pass aint we. The men no doubt are dogs, but shouldnt these girls be called biatches too? When they know nothing happens, they are even encouraged to break more homes. And then they get married hoping to have loving husbands? 1 Like |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by tpia6: 2:53pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
TV01: in that case she will beat the bejeezes out of the so called man at some point. win win situation. maybe the wife was doing sme sme before, saying she must not disrespect her creeping husband. let the creeping mistress do it for you. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Nobody: 2:54pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
bukatyne:. : Wikipedia:Harassment for harassment-related policies on Wikipedia. Stalking is unwanted or obsessive attention by an individual or group toward another person. Stalking behaviors are related to harassment and intimidation and may include following the victim in person or monitoring them. The word stalking is used, with some differing meanings, in psychology and psychiatry and also in some legal jurisdictions as a term for a criminal offense. According to a 2002 report by the National Center for Victims of Crime, "virtually any unwanted contact between two people that directly or indirectly communicates a threat or places the victim in fear can be considered stalking,"[1] although in practice the legal standard is usually somewhat stricter. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by Kimoni: 2:54pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
bukatyne: My dear, several reasons ooo Obsession about his looks, his money, his person, his office whatever. Or perhaps for the ultimate benefit eg students and lecturers, applicants and whoever it is that's going to make it click. I just know this shit happens. |
Re: Confronting The Mistress by TV01(m): 2:54pm On Oct 30, 2014 |
Kimoni:My second point is in relation to my first. If it's still at the shameless heffer stage and wife is with hubby, a withering put-down can end things. Other than that, I think the wife should stay classy at all times and not sully herself by physically engaging the mistrss - it almost makes them competitors. Wives should never, ever elevate her or demean themselves. TV |
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