Nekk:
Madam, I must say that we are in the same shoes, I read your stories over and over again to be sure I wasn't the one that typed it.
Am so following this story because it will help me heal, I feel myself dying slowly of pain. God men are mean.

urheme:


my dear, don,t die because of man,
don,t kill any body because of man,
don,t let man kill you,

develop a hard shell to his infidelities that is if divorce is not an option for you, keep your self happy, live your life, concentrate on giving your kids a good life
he may go and take another wife, don,t care and don,t hurt especially if you have a well paying job to look after your self, get busy, go for higher degree as phd and other professional courses.

[size=16pt]if you are so emotional about sex and love which I believe is just a relief from tension, you can use prayers to hold your self if you are a strong Christian,[/size] if not indulge in vibrators, it will not kill you slowly like your husband, my cheating husband is the least of my worries.

Delete that part and leave only the Vi-brators..



Or hells.. She should find herself a side boo.. Afterall, Whats good for the Greece, is good for Uganda.


The one thing I know is that a Cheating woman is harder to catch than a cheating Man.

EnlightenedSoul:


Same here. Call me biased, but that's a gr8 policy. I feel divorce is a conclusion only the member(s) of the marriage should come to, and not something to be directly advised. Especially on the internet.

Chiefpriest1:
There are basically three kinds of cheats, the serial cheat, the occasional cheat and those who stray once in a while. More than 95per cent of nigerian husbands would fall into this category at a point in their life.

Your decision would be informed by the category he falls, but I want to believe he just strayed since this is the first time you ve 'caught' him.

Matters like this require patience. Some kids who have never had a relationship talk more of getting married will soon be here to advice you to divorce your husband. Fact is that most men cheat and many of those who are not cheating probably havent had the chance.

Depending on the kind of man you married (you know him better than everyone here), I guess what you should do is to have a heart to heart talk with him. Dont be confrontational.

Ask him if hes willing to swap his happy family with whatever pleasure he's getting outside.

Appeal to his emotions without being judgmental. The intention is to break him, make him 'confess' , apologise and promise that it wont happen again.

If he does this, forgive him and try forgetting, though it might be difficult. If you see him as your last bus stop, you ll do everything to make the marriage work.

I am not advising you to start asking yourself unnecessary questions, but you might need to check if you haven't shifted attention from your husband to your children.

Women tend to do that alot, forgetting that they met the man first before the kids started coming(marriage counsellors know this).

Whatever it is, dont hate him, dont get violent. Dont let the devil take charge. He ll come around and things Will be normal again.

MadCow1:



Delete that part and leave only the Vi-brators..



Or hells.. She should find herself a side boo.. Afterall, Whats good for the Greece, is good for Uganda.


The one thing I know is that a Cheating woman is harder to catch than a cheating Man.

SirShymex:


I missed this yesterday. I shouldn't be doing this, but I'll do it for argument sake.

Now let's analyse the logic behind the "bad ar.se," can we?

If money is the reason why both Hillary Clinton stayed in their marriages, wouldn't it be logical in that context for them get divorced, and elope with half of their husbands' wealth - rather than stay there, and remain an appendage, while allowing the men to keep their wealth intact?

Then if it were the status. Let's leave Monica Lewinsky - Hillary Clinton was already a Senator and prominent figure in US politics when Bill Clinton was cheating with Liz Hurley. And if she had left him, it wouldn't have affected her one bit. Then Victoria Beckham was already a superstar with Spice Girls before David Beckham (though David Beckham had/still-has a higher net worth). And when he was cheating - she had already become a fashion icon. Heck, she was a big name in the fashion world back then, and she also just moved to New York to tap into the US market. So, if she had left him - it wouldn't have affected her brand. Victoria beckham made David Beckham a global brand/icon.

So, can you please educate me about the "bad ar.se" in her illogical rebuttals?

urheme:


let her hubby come and see the quality and size of my V-B he will know he is less than a man
cheating man, why should I worry my self with one when he is busy enjoying him self, rubbish,

do will really need these men?

smokescreen4:
Why is life so unfair to women? it pays to be a man and a nigerian man for dat matter, I wished God asked us to choose our sex, ALOT of women would love to be men, the only thing dat is fair to both men and women is death.i have no advice for you happy wife.

majekdom2:
life is not fair to anyone.... Soe men go through though challenges too.

smokescreen4:
what kind of challenges? society gives you guys free pass for alot of vices, one thing is certain as a Christian I know they will be none of dis in the great beyond, men don't even Consider adultery as sin anymore.

majekdom2:
its never a gender thing .... The fact that a married woman comes out publicly on her cheating hubby does not mean some married women don't cheat, I know some . It is never right to generalize. I am not good at criticizing but do the young girls that follow these married men don't know adultery is a sin . Some babes have it merry in their youths and come complaining the hubby cheat at sometime. I have been against cheating on this thread, but we should leave sentiments out of this. I really don't like that pity statement " that life is not fair to the women"

Chiefpriest1:
There are basically three kinds of cheats, the serial cheat, the occasional cheat and those who stray once in a while. More than 95per cent of nigerian husbands would fall into this category at a point in their life.

Your decision would be informed by the category he falls, but I want to believe he just strayed since this is the first time you ve 'caught' him.

Matters like this require patience. Some kids who have never had a relationship talk more of getting married will soon be here to advice you to divorce your husband. Fact is that most men cheat and many of those who are not cheating probably havent had the chance.

Depending on the kind of man you married (you know him better than everyone here), I guess what you should do is to have a heart to heart talk with him. Dont be confrontational.

Ask him if hes willing to swap his happy family with whatever pleasure he's getting outside.

Appeal to his emotions without being judgmental. The intention is to break him, make him 'confess' , apologise and promise that it wont happen again.

If he does this, forgive him and try forgetting, though it might be difficult. If you see him as your last bus stop, you ll do everything to make the marriage work.

I am not advising you to start asking yourself unnecessary questions, but you might need to check if you haven't shifted attention from your husband to your children.

Women tend to do that alot, forgetting that they met the man first before the kids started coming(marriage counsellors know this).

Whatever it is, dont hate him, dont get violent. Dont let the devil take charge. He ll come around and things Will be normal again.

SirShymex:


I missed this yesterday. I shouldn't be doing this, but I'll do it for argument sake.

Now let's analyse the logic behind the "bad ar.se," can we?

If money is the reason why both Hillary Clinton stayed in their marriages, wouldn't it be logical in that context for them get divorced, and elope with half of their husbands' wealth - rather than stay there, and remain an appendage, while allowing the men to keep their wealth intact?

Then if it were the status. Let's leave Monica Lewinsky - Hillary Clinton was already a Senator and prominent figure in US politics when Bill Clinton was cheating with Liz Hurley. And if she had left him, it wouldn't have affected her one bit. Then Victoria Beckham was already a superstar with Spice Girls before David Beckham (though David Beckham had/still-has a higher net worth). And when he was cheating - she had already become a fashion icon. Heck, she was a big name in the fashion world back then, and she also just moved to New York to tap into the US market. So, if she had left him - it wouldn't have affected her brand. Victoria beckham made David Beckham a global brand/icon.

So, can you please educate me about the "bad ar.se" in her illogical rebuttals?

SirShymex:


And when did broke nyggahs start cheating? The only thing broke nyggahs have and use for stress relief is their wives' pum...cos there ain't no one checking for broke nyggahs out there.

However, these women have the world on their feet...and they could have opted for divorce, and run off with half of their husbands' wealth. But they never did that. They're classy women who understand the fact that imperfection is what makes us human. And that thought their decisions through, by looking at the bigger picture.

Only nasty and needy women think about wealth as the on glue that makes marriage work. Sometimes you just have to look at the bigger picture and what the institution represents, including the kids involved.

majekdom2:
cheating is not a Nigerian thing.

Odutodaiwa:


Madam mutter, may your days be long. I have a non submissive woman in my home now. Infact, I would be better of marrying an illiterate. You actually made so much sense with your advice on how to treat her husband. A lot of these our 21st century girls are made about these their women's right today. Very soon our communities will collapse like the african american community.

A white feminist woman teaches our girls that men and women have equal rights. Dem white feminists get back home and shower love on their husbands only for you black mugu to be shouting on your man. you say 10 things before he says one. Tell me any man who is will willin to cope with a nagging wife today.

saucechilli:


My dear, you can say it again. Mothers married to their sons instead of husbands. Once their sons have a baby, they pick up their Ghana must go bag heading for omugwo. Leaving the wandering blokus man of a husband. That kin life.

Pathetic

bukatyne:


So equal rights = shouting competition?

Do you shout at your mates at work or school?

If you are a tenant, all tenants have equal rights and obligations, do you scream at your neighbors?

Chiefpriest1:
There are basically three kinds of cheats, the serial cheat, the occasional cheat and those who stray once in a while. More than 95per cent of nigerian husbands would fall into this category at a point in their life.

Your decision would be informed by the category he falls, but I want to believe he just strayed since this is the first time you ve 'caught' him.

Matters like this require patience. Some kids who have never had a relationship talk more of getting married will soon be here to advice you to divorce your husband. Fact is that most men cheat and many of those who are not cheating probably havent had the chance.

Depending on the kind of man you married (you know him better than everyone here), I guess what you should do is to have a heart to heart talk with him. Dont be confrontational.

Ask him if hes willing to swap his happy family with whatever pleasure he's getting outside.

Appeal to his emotions without being judgmental. The intention is to break him, make him 'confess' , apologise and promise that it wont happen again.

If he does this, forgive him and try forgetting, though it might be difficult. If you see him as your last bus stop, you ll do everything to make the marriage work.

I am not advising you to start asking yourself unnecessary questions, but you might need to check if you haven't shifted attention from your husband to your children.

Women tend to do that alot, forgetting that they met the man first before the kids started coming(marriage counsellors know this).

Whatever it is, dont hate him, dont get violent. Dont let the devil take charge. He ll come around and things Will be normal again.

bukatyne:


I have never heard it justified any where else like this

Nigerian men (with Nigerian behaviors)! Tufiakwa!

MadCow1:



Whats your point exactly?!


The guy say ehn wife dey hala for am, you dey talk about neighbours.

bukatyne:


He should not blame it on feminism

Even some of the women who existed before the advent of feminism were disrespectful to their husbands.

True That!


SO basically, ehn wife just get bad character.

pickabeau1:
Have u gone to other forums aside NL

have u interacted closely with other nationalities

A prophet is not welcome in his home

MadCow1:



True That!


SO basically, ehn wife just get bad character.

bukatyne:


Bros,

I rebuked and rejected a 'Nigerian' man and God in His infinite mercy answered my prayers.

I have neither the strength nor time to cope with one

MadCow1:




A VB will only shake your kpekus vigorously and that's it.. Men are more than just 'live diicks'..

The OP's matter is not peculiar to her alone. Many women are in this boat.

bukatyne:


Exactly!

Wat's up with the Islamic section on NL? I wanted to compliment some dresses on one hijab thread and I saw confess you believe in Allah abc and I ran

My reliable Sources informed me that Suen has been made an offer he couldnt possibly refuse to isolate the Muslim section from the rest of Nairaland..


So basically, you are free to enter any part of Nairaland except the area that houses the potentia Terrorists and Mujahadeens..

The Isolation of the Muslim section of Nairaland should be a cause for National Security concerns..