Let me summarise my story.
I was sick few months back and got admitted to this hospital. That was when I met this young man who was also a patient that time, he is 26 years old, he took so much interest in my health and we became close and exchange contacts at the hospital. One thing led to the other, he always call to check on me after I was discharged and this got me attracted to him. Weeks later, he started stopping by at my office to pick me up after work and drop me at my place before going to his house.
Before we know it, we started exchanging visits and we were so close. 7 months after meeting him at the hospital, we already have each other's spare keys. I do go to his house unannounced and he also do the same to my apartment. The whole thing was like magic, the chemistry began to wax stronger as day goes by.
He told his friends and his younger sister behind me that I'm his fiance. But when he introduced me to them facially. He would say "Friends, meet vera, vera meet my friends". At first, I wasn't bothered but it got to a time when his friends and sister would see me and be asking me, "vera, how is your fiance doing?". I was like fiance gini? This guy never asked me out, we are just close. It got to a time that I had to ask his sister what he told her about me. His sister was shocked when I told her that we are just friends. She never believed it because his brother had informed the family that I'm his fiancee and a girl he would get married to. I stylishly interrogate few of his friends and the story was the same. His friends even made me realized how he could die without me.
I sat down and reasoned. I have never seen this young man closed to any other lady despite his profession, he would call me like 5 times a day, send me little romantic texts, comes to pick me at home in the morning and drop me in the evening. He gave me his spare key to visit any time, he never password his phone and he is so plain, loving and caring. His friends and family sees me as their potential inlaw, even my friends find it hard to believe each time I told them that I wasn't dating akin.
But to be sincere, I so much love him and have feelings for him. Infact, I have chased other potential suitors all because of him. I could see it clearly on his eyes that he loved me to, anytime a guy calls me on phone in his presence, his mood would change and I could remember that his eyes were soaked one particular day when I spent like 18minutes on a call with a guy and was laughing loud and teasing on the call, when the call ended, I noticed his eyelids were soaked, I pretended not to notice. Most times, he would hold my hands, hug me but find it difficult to look into my eyes. And when he finally tries to do so, he would be speechless and I would read clearly "fear" on his face as I could feel his heart beating heavily.
Yes we go out on shopping, dates and so on, but its just the usual chit chat fun, a little bit of romance but he is always scared to make body contacts, each time I tried moving close to him or looked into his face, all I could see is "fear" and my face isn't scary oooooo, infact, I started smiling always because of him oooo.
This is the 11th month of our friendship and this guy never told me that "vera, I want you to be my girl". All he always do is to tell me on chats or messages that he missed me and can't wait to be with me again, but when we see face to face, he wouldn't say anything. Always looking at the ceiling or the floor.
I'm so confused, I so much love this guy. He posses all what I wanted in a man, I knew he so much love me too. His family and friends sees me as his girl, he is so caring that even a boyfriend can't do most of the things he do to me. Now my problem is that, I can NEVER woo him my self,NEVER. but how do I help to remove the fear on his face?, how do I make him "talk the talk", or should I just pretend that we are dating?. Even his sister told me secretly that his brother had never been in a relationship before because he is the shy and scared type when it comes to women.

just like me

Don't you guys do heart-to-heart talk atimes? And have you at any time thrown him the "what are your short/long term goals" format? Stop dulling, get up and make him say something. Don't come back here crying if he ditches you at the dying minute for a girl that goes for what she wants..
I don tok ma own oo

A relationship that never exist.
Wake up both of you

Hiya
He's just so timid

Say something, ask him what his intentions are towards you, get him losing up a bit by asking him to tell you his past love life, if he's had heartbreaks before, ask him if he loves you and what he thinks of you. He's too shy and like the sister said you may be his first ever date, or that he's had terrible past experience in his former relationships, make him losing up, let him feel at ease around you, do everything you can to get your man all to yourself and shelve your ego by the side. If you want him, deserve him, it's up to you alone to get him. All the best!

This one is strong!!. "Eleyi gidi gan"

From my own point of view o.I tink d guy's shy.Also mayb in his previöus relatnshp,he luvd d gal xo much and his ex broke his heart eventually and he feels dat hehe if i give my heart to dis1 wnt she break it.Well i tink you guys shld av a hrt 2 hrt talk.

@ op so u joined d forum today just to share dis topic, well........ Its up to u to make d guy talk.... Just ask d needed questions.
Welcome to d forum where all problems are solved, pls make sure u let us kno ow d story ends

I've been on both sides of the field, and so ... Am seeing the situation better. The guy is a shy guy, and for you to bring out the best in him, hide your ego, make him feel free, make him feel secured by your words and actions.
When a man meets a woman he can't afford to loss, he losses his confidence and becomes too conscious. But a man feels free, when nothing is at stake.
One thing is certain, he loves you.

its so obvious Dat ur guy is soooooooooo shy. u guys are already in a relationship its just dat u haven't defined it yet. u like him he likes u, u can indirectly ask him out. e.g u can ask him
''wat am I to u?" and if he replies u by saying ur just friends then u can say
''but d way we are we have gone beyond being just friends''... remind him of wah he said to he' s family and friends.
by doing this u've given him d push to ask u out. but if my guy no understand u then babe I'll just have to tell him how u feel.


gudluck.

the sister has told u already. he's d shy type. never be in a relationship. here's what to do. ask him simply especially when he's very happy to "define ur relationship". smile when asking him...he'll either fumble with words like the wimp that he is or tell u straight "u r my woman". in case it's d former pls grab d bull by date horns n say, "u r my man for life".

Ask him to define your relationship with him

Y not take d bold step nd ask him d big question so dt both of u will no where u stand

who blow u for mouth @op? loll

DO you need a soothsayer to tell you he likes you..maybe his courage always fails him..just have it at your heart that he likes you,and perhaps you can take the bull by the heart,and ask him what's really btw the two of you..

He's the shy type,and afraid of what your response might be..

Vera, I say it to ur face that u re not confused rather you re being naive.
if Mohammed no fit go meet mountain, mountain sef go come down come meet Mohammed. U said "never" and I say "I laugh you in Spanish"

He's just so shy and timid.
Op,you have the spare key of his house and you still dey ask question?
Anyway,you need to find a subtle way to get him to propose.

There is already a talking point you can harp onto without making it look like you 'toasted' him.

You are called his fiancee by his family and friends....simply ask him open ended questions around that and let him spill his guts.

But Missy, are you saying that at the point where both of you exchanged keys you never asked him why? That would be very strange.

One day, another lady wil wo him and take him away from you. The Niqqa is timid, you better step up or lose him soon

It is obvious He is shy & you've to give him that enabling environment to express himself by getting Him to define your status

Some people need bold people to pull them out of the cauldron of shyness..
Try this on him..
1-i have been waiting for you to ask me out..
2-don't you think after 11months of friendship, we take a step Further??.
3-don't you think we start preparing for our wedding?? Or let's get married.. My parents are waiting for you to come and pay my bride price..
If you wait for him to ask you out. You are on a long thing.. Hold fast to your man and Bury your ego..
You can tell him plainly, marry me...
I bet you if it doesn't work,.. Rain dollars on me..

Since he is too shy to express himself,u'll have 2 be d 'man' here,
i'll suggest u send him a text message,expressing ur feelings

But frankly speaking gals mumu oh
See as one wan friendzone her future husband all in the useless name of he has not asked her out
Must he ask u out for u to see de sign haba make una fear God for once nah

FruityLass:
Hiya
He's just so timid

Timid??
I would say i share similar situation wit d guy in question.
I loved a girl so much i couldn't initiate any romantic gesture. . Kisses, hugs etc but i know i love her and can marry her if neccesary.
But i just can't initiate romance or sex for one singular reason '' I don't want to take advantage on her'' if she could make the first move i would oblige her.

Why i act like this?

Because once i meet a girl, the first and only thing that i would want is sex.. So naturally since what i want from this chick in perspective is not sex, i can never approach her for intimacy and believe me this is putting the relationship in a lot of presure.. . Its making it look like i am her best friend. . . As a matter of fact, life is so complex and intriguing..

Back to Topic, if you love him. Ask him to be your lover and even initiate intimate advances i believe he would take it from there.
Thank You.

Oh my adorable vera...
I would try to summon some courage and ask u out tonight now that i know u have feelings for me too..
I had always wanted to, but the fear of being 'let down' wouldnt just let me...
Your sweetpie...
Akin

chimerase2:
But frankly speaking gals mumu oh
See as one wan friendzone her future husband all in the useless name of he has not asked her out
Must he ask u out for u to see de sign haba make una fear God for once nah

And to think they exchanged spare keys o......this op has problem, you did all those with the guy and still tag it "just friends "....the dude has literally made his point clear without words yet your forming ignoramus... continue... be waiting..... don't take the bull by the balls you hear.... continue waiting, by the time those girls that are hunting for husband take him away, you'll know wazzup

From your comments here. Some wants me to pretend as if we are already dating. Now, how would some who hasn't asked me out proposed to me in the future?. I think one is the pre-requisite to the other.

And also, those who told me to take charge. How will I just look into his eyes and say "Akin, pls be my man". Won't I look desperate?.

I just wanted an idea on what to do exactly that would make him "talk the talk"?. Atleats, that one would give me full assurance that we are dating.

I can NEVER woo him my self,NEVER. but how do I help to remove the fear on his face?, how do I make him "talk the talk", or should I just pretend that we are dating?.

This is what you should do, first ask him what type of girl he likes to date. If he describes a girl like you, then ask him if he dreams/likes to date you. At this point you will know where you stand in the relationship, without him knowing what you want.

onihaxy:
This one is strong!!. "Eleyi gidi gan"

i say dis one is strong...eleyi gidi gan........oya bring the holy cane..emu panpe mimo wa

Vera I want you to know that that guy is shy and afraid. He loves you very much but due to shyness and also fear of rejection, he is not telling you what you want to hear. I also believe that he does not know that you love him like you do which also addd to hi fears. I think what you ca do is sit him down and talk to him to try and remove the shyness in him, let him know that you love him and will not reject him. I believe if he gphears this from you, he will open up.

this is true friendship and that how it should be...

that how mature people like us behave...

we allow it to flow and thing will play out for its self