Honestly blue, dis ur story got me rolling and laughing hard! Jeez! I love dat kpoaaaaaa part, n am quite sure he's going to get his own dose! What i dont like is d fact dat he's too lenient on ladies, dem too de slap am, haba!

Wonderful, wonderful update! Thanks blue!

oghenekome51:
Honestly blue, dis ur story got me rolling and laughing hard! Jeez! I love dat kpoaaaaaa part, n am quite sure he's going to get his own dose! What i dont like is d fact dat he's too lenient on ladies, dem too de slap am, haba!

Wonderful, wonderful update! Thanks blue!

am grateful my beloved. Ill dedicate the next update to you

dedicated to oghenekome51
He stood tall, i wondered what image was going through his mind that moment. I imagined what his future will look like, maybe an old man riding a keke napep, he so much love that profession. You know it not easy manovering your way through the city filled with automobiles and people, bro it called talent.

As i watched captain staring at the sky i became worried and jealous. Was his future that big? Slowly his gaze came down. He grinned.

"captain wetin do you na" i asked pulling his hand.

"thank you...thank you..." he mouthed in whispers. Chaiiii! Captain was mad o! Finally? he looked like some one who had visited Yabaleft before but i didn't want to be the nigga that was to rekindle his powers.

"thank you Jesus, at your service lord" he continued. When last did he pronounce that name Jesus? Chai! My slap surely work wonders in this world.

I won't forget the day i slap a man in our neighbourhood. He was trying to chyke my mum, imagine! we were coming back from market. he ran like say something pursue am. My mum laughed and got ribs ache.

Me sef run o i bin the think say something dey my back o cause the race the guy piloted ehhh, usain bolt never practice that one yet.

I was so surprised to see captains eyes closed, murmuring incoherent words. Was he praying? Question for his gods.

I shook him hard.

"dont disturb, the spirit is moving, it circulating.." he mouthed with seriousness. This guy don mad atlast o!

To say i was worried will be an understatement. Everything i did to bring the ol captain was in vain, i shook, i kicked. He stood, still praying. I have to say he was praying since i could pick out words such as: fire, bind, spirit, Jesus.

"chineke" he mouthed, his eyes bulged out. Now he was swerving from Jesus to chineke. His madness has surely graduated.

"look back ohh Jerusalem and see the queen i told you about" he preached. Who was Jerusalem? Reluctantly, i turned. My eyes met the most gorgeous lady I've ever seen. She was sexy in all ramifications.

She was cat walking out of her house to us. My eyes bulged out too as i stared at the most beautiful girl on planet earth. For the first time captain saw a good thing.
She was dressed in red top and a knee length skirt. I begin imagine how her laps will feel. How fresh her b**bs and how she moans when being bl***ped.
Great Manchester she got, fully positioned.
She walked past us as if we didn't exist. As she passed, her back came into view, big and enormous, Chai! I couldn't help letting such a priceless jewel escape and so i called when i found my tongue.

"hi.... An...an....gel" did i just stammer. She stop and gave us a glance. Her eyes met mine and i forgot everything i stored in my brain. She walked over to us, i swear she heard captains heart beat, it sounded very loud, more like the drums of nursery school children when going on parade.

Then i remembered her as she got closer. She was the girl i met in the bus on my return from church road.

They girl i was staring at still my money got removed by the fat men.

I almost fainted due to high bp, seems she recognised me and she smiled. A smile that melted my heart, melted my soul and spirit if i had one, and gave me great peace within.

Captain was speaking in tongues again, shaking his head and snapping his fingers. Smh for him

Nice update Bluestarry

Lmao

Nice update baba blue

"hi..." she said as she advanced towards us. Every steps she took rhymed with my heart beat.

"hi..hi.. " i stammered yet again. Common, what wrong with me? Stuttering like a school kid? I composed my self and braced up as she extended her hand towards mine which were pocketed as sign of being composed, body and soul. I wouldn't let a mere girl take away my confidence and ego.

Since my right hand was pocketed and the left free, her extended hand came, directed towards my almost rigid d***.

Thinking she wanted to touch or grap the poor thing which had been starved for almost a month, i immediately used my left hand to protect it from the scanning eyes of the wicked.

An act which earn me a grave look from her. She laughed it off. My Bazokka was now rigid, and it could be seen as i removed my hand to shake her soft delicate hands, which added more blood to my already heavy bazokka.
After the handshake, captain had fully recovered from his future. He was smiling at the lady in my front, his eyes were only fixed on her exposed bosoms and fresh straight legs.

"seems i met you some where" she said smiling as her eyes went down my crotch.

"ya...but not in a good state" she laughed.

"those men almost kill me" i mouthed as we advanced away from captain. She laughed again.

"not every year one is opportune to meet a goddess like you . ? " she blushed, ya, i saw it.


"you live around?" she asked.


"ya... The next street...your house is a wow!" i complimented. She gave that charming smile again.

"thanks"

"so you live alone?" i asked

"why do you want to know?"

"to take precautions when coming on a visit" i said smiling. No be only she fit smile na. She laughed again. I was so happy she laughed to my words. Maybe faking them, who knows.

"you'll get yourselve battered with cutlass" my heart skipped a beat as i heard the word, 'cutlass'. I remembered as my oga landlord chased me around with his two legendary doubles edged cutlass. A devil he was, Adamus carbon copy to be precise.


"i was going to a junction... we ill meet next time" she said snapping me out from my reverie.

" ohh...okay since am allergic to cutlass, i won't dare smelling here again, but your number please" i begged. She reluctantly called out her number loud and i immediately punched in the digits. I turned back, captain was busy with his phone, he was smiling.

I dial her number and it went through.

"thanks.... " captain came over to us and greeted the lady.

"will you come back fast?" he queried. The girl was scrutinizing him awkwardly. Maybe never seen such a coded mad man before.

" we will wait for you till you come back" he said smiling sheepishly at her. Without sparing him a glance, she bade me goodbye. Oops! I forgot to ask of her name.

After she left, i was left with the mad nigga. He was jealous. Was he serious of us waiting behind for her? Didnt he heard that cutlass and agony awaited the stranded soul that goes there without invitation?

I was so surprise to see him bouncing into the compound, confidently.

I called him back, for where? He located a spot before the door and sat down.

I went after him to inform him i was going. He proved stubborn. If only we knew what will happen in a couple of minutes.

" i teh you make you chyke geh gv me you go chyke carry ba? If you don do your own oya dey go, make i follow psyche my own" he said stretching his stony legs. If that leg touch you, you shall feel no 'pains'.

Every words and tried to make the guy reason proved abortive and so i sat down with him. I couldn't go since i came with him, moreover, i thought he was kidding.

"who dey dia?" a base voice roared behind. I turned, a macho man stood beside me with the biggest bull dog I've ever seen. Infact a tiger to be precise.


My heart jumped into my mouth when the beast advanced, his red tongues hanging below, with leg shaking, i turned to notify my friend of the intrusion of the beast.


Lo and behold, captain was no where to be found. Did he efface? No! Madmen dont have the powers to disappear or do they? If yes, then captain was one.

On the place he sat was his palms, he disappeared without his shoes? The bark of the dog brought me back from my shock and i sprang up and ran the race of my life, followed closely was the bull dog and the owner. I was indeed done for.

"cutlass...cutlass...catch am... Bone dey for you" those were the words of encouragement given to the dog by the man to catch me.

A hot liquid ran down my legs as i ran my legs hitting my medulla oblogata.

Blue don kpai

yeah ftc

tecno4life:
Blue don kpai

yeah ftc

lol gawd forbid

Bluestarry:

"cutlass...cutlass...catch am... Bone dey for you" those were the words of encouragement given to the dog by the man to catch me.

A hot liquid ran down my legs as i ran my legs hitting my medulla oblogata.

omo Boi... Laff wan rilly kill me die.... I nearly piss for body.... Hahahahahahahahahah

Bluestarry:
am grateful my beloved. Ill dedicate the next update to you

blue uno go kill me today! Laugh won kill me buh i survive sha, chai! Thanks for dedicating................(borrow me english) lolzzzzzzzzz! What am i saying? Weldone blue, weldone sire!

blue, abeg no kill me for here ooo..na only me dey my room but my neighbors think say i don mad ni..i don laugh tire..

Hello pretty

Baba blue dor enta

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha this blue na madt man ah swear

labaski:
i break for ds ur m

babe we can talk about something else like errr are you searching?

SailorXY:

babe we can talk about something else like errr are you searching?

for wat

Hi guys. Sorry for not updating, i was banned. Busy now, ill update when am free

--continuation--
I ran a race I've never and will never run in the nearest future. I wouldn't let such a beast get hold of me cause if it does, then no one will find my bones and skeletons for Burial if one will be even be conducted.

Joe once said, that when i die, groundnut and sachet water will be given as refreshment in my burial. I feared it might come true since i was away from my parent. who would give me a biffiting burial if i get kill by cutlass?.


Trailing closely behind was the dog. My shoes were proving difficulty, i got rid of them. I was gradually becoming tired and my toes hurt, badly. I tripped and fell like a bag of akpu. No one told me to sprang up again, i did without being told.

The man's shout was becoming distant, i branched a narrow path which lead into the bush.

"i shall not die" i prayed silently as i ran. I heard no more growling sounds, i concluded i had lost the dog. Looking back, no dog was insight, i collapsed on the grasses breathing heavily. A tree was behind me.

My mind went back to the action film i just experienced. Where was captain? I always suspected ngozi was a whitch, maybe she cut small dash my nigga.

But wait o! Na so her witch strong? I wouldn't mine to take a sip of it if wintches are given in liquid or solid. Which everway, i concluded if i get out of the race alive, i would ask ngozi for a greater portion of her solution. As elisha asked Elija. Who knows, it might be of help in desperate times.

Just as i was about laying my back down on the grass, i heard growls, tilting my head upwards, my eyes popped out of it socket as i saw cutlass, sitting un front of me.

My brothers and sisters, i dont know what happened again, i dont know how i jumped on the paw paw tree beside me.

I just saw myself on a tree, clasping on it as if my life depended on it. I held and gripped onto the tree as i lifted my legs up high.

My heart beat shook the tree with every beat. I looked down, the dog was trying to eat the base of the tree.

Laughters erupted from the nearby bush, and the macho man came into view.

"bros wetin you dey do up dia" he asked.

"i wan pluck orange"

"na orange tree be that?"

"i dont know...am a stranger o" i replied my voice shaking. although the situation i found my self didn't warrant the answers i gave him.

My hands were getting weak and so were my Legs, but i dare not let go of my tree.

"bros no be steal we come do o " i said, my voice almost gave way to cries.

" i say na steal you steal? But next time make enquiries before you chyke any babe" he adviced patting the dogs head. How i go the make enquiries? I swear that the first time i heard that such an advice. Enquiries before wooing? Smh.

"oya come down... come go" he said leading his tiger out of the bush. I didn't want to come but my hands were aching. What if he was waiting out there for me?


Reluctantly i came down, my heart was still pounding, i set out of the bush.

Funny. More MB to your data. Update asap

nice 1

Chai! Laugh won kill me die! Lolzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz! Dis guys fall ma hand, ugo fear big boy na!
Bros blue, tuale for u o!

blue, u for ask the maco man why u supose enqiure before u chaik babe

Palchukwy:
blue, u for ask the maco man why u supose enqiure before u chaik babe

haa! Bros you no wan make i live ba?

buahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahha
Blue don make me piss for pant
Chaiii
Nice 1
Next time make u dey take advice

Were baba blue na

lollz better take that advice ooo

labaski:
for wat

companion

justicesky24:
Were baba blue na

i don lick am finsh , bro

I walked along the path leading me out of the bush. When i was out into the open, i surveyed the road, no sign of cutlass and the macho. I gave a sigh of relieve and moved out of the bush.

---

I arrived home minutes later. I opened the door and went in through the corridor. The house was unusually quite. Abi guys don comot?.

I listened attentively, someone was wailing, . I paused on my tracks. It sounded male-ish if there is a word like that.

It sounded like captains voice . I was surprise o!

"na who the shouts" i thought loudly.

What wrong, why is he wailing like that? Or his normal lame jokes? I barged open the corridor. No soul was seen, i strolled down a bit.

I didn't see any body. The scream came again, i followed the sounds of the voice. It led me deeper into the woods.

What a surprise i met. A distant away from me, A bush was cleared,
Lo, captain was tilling the earthen soil with a shovel.

The ground he was tilling was large and deep as his knees were hidden, maybe he wanted to bury a coffin i thought as i couldn't grap what he intended doing with the ditch he was digging. Oboy see rhyme.

He was on boxer and singlet, he was the one wailing, screaming intervally as he dug into the earth.

Squatting by the side were vicky and ngozi, Becky rested on the back of the mango tree. Vicky used the back of her hand to wipe something from her face. Shaking her head afterwards.

Joe's mouth was open, he was holding his stomach, seems he was laughing. Rock? He stood, his heads bow, their lips were moving. I couldn't hear what they were communicating, so i moved nearer

I was so so surprise at their action. Abi dem dey dig for hare? As i got nearer i could eavesdrop their communications. They were so engrossed with their actions that they couldn't hear the rustling of the leaves and the footsteps.

"haaaa!" Becky exclaimed.

"blue die just like that?" vicky added sitting on the ground, her legs spread.

Ahhhhh! Me? Die? For where? Not the blue i know.

"captain you know say i no trust you?" rock said.

"my guy don die o i tell am o i tell am make we go o e no gree" captain wailed again. I had heard enough.

" captain na so you dey?" i said and approached them. They were all startled, Becky quickly stood up and tear a race I've never seen before. Infact i no run reach am the time cutlass pursue me.

Vicky followed with ngozi, shouting 'ghost'. Rock back was pushing against the bark of the mango, he looked so tensed and was perspirating.

Joe sprinted also but fell like a man on agbada, rolling like a FIFA ball. captain? He fell into the ditch he was digging, murmuring incoherent words.

I was frightened myself. Frightened by their sudden action. I turned to rock who was now laughing. Close to tears and now laughing?

" wetin happen? Why una run? Wetin?" i asked advancing towards rock.
He laughed more.

" na captain o" he said.
Ehhhh! Hope say no be wetin i dey think o. What do you think captain did?