cococandy:


And I'd finished typing my epistle before I saw their follow up drama.
What a waste of time
Bored kid on the loose most likely

Babymama1:




Your behavior that day was out of control and would have cost you a jail time in civilized countries

assuming his story is true, he doesn't know how serious an offense it is.
Beat up your wife and a kid and come online to admit it. Only a man who's ready to flush all his years of handwork down the toilet, lose his job and home and go to prison in addition will try that here.

dinachi:
Just as predicted...she panders to the gutter digs up filth and pours on herself again. Are you addicted to idiotic ramblings?

[img]http://media20./media/gswsH2I4U4u6Q/giphy.gif?w=320[/img]

Chillisauce:


[img]http://media20./media/gswsH2I4U4u6Q/giphy.gif?w=320[/img]

Bwahahaha!

Oh my Lord! This gif has killed me!

Chilli, you don kolo o!

ileobatojo:



Bwahahaha!

Oh my Lord! This gif has killed me!

Chilli, you don kolo o!

Happy Sunday ma,am. Wanna be like b you when I grow up.

Chillisauce:


[img]http://media20./media/gswsH2I4U4u6Q/giphy.gif?w=320[/img]

Here she goes again displaying an epic proportion of classlessness', total lack of basic intelligence and the reason why she should be allowed to continue STINKING! It is not your fault, violence is in your genes and only a well timed and expertly delivered handsome uppercut will set you free. Do me a favor get your husband if you have any boxing gloves! He needs it for your as5whopping .

dinachi:
Here she goes again displaying an epic proportion of classlessness', total lack of basic intelligence and the reason why she should be allowed to continue STINKING! It is not your fault, violence is in your genes and only a well timed and expertly delivered handsome uppercut will set you free. Do me a favor get your husband if you have any boxing gloves! He needs it for your as5whopping .

Maybe you can transfer the panty sniffing to grandma. I understand how stinky your mama,s panties must be that every female gender you meet, stinking comes to your mind.

How long does she wear hers. Or maybe she makes you wash her stinky pants after her routine with her oloshi clients. Which shows the straffing you were receiving in your butty hole.

smartigo:
Romance section irritates me due to the level of childish talks n love love n love matter(smh); family section is full of squabbles because we have very emotional n egocentric posters. It is disheartening when a thread is turned south.

To be fair, it is not easy loving someone who had been bad to you;the spousal abuse had affected the op who didn't care about her husband staying late. That event is a culmination of series of events which the op didn't divulge.

It is difficult for me to judge in this issue other than for the woman to help herself. If the kitchen is too hot, get out. But avoid calling your husband names on public forum. Shikena !

Nah..

That's what's done best here.. Rash Judgemet , and instead of being diplomatic , the absent party is always sent into his/her early grave.

They both should be reprimanded for using under aged child for a maid.

Meanwhile for those talking about spare keys, I previously wanted to ask wife same q ... then it clicked . the Nigeria I remember always have shutters at the back of the door.

My advice to couple: Get help ASAP.

Chillisauce:




Happy Sunday ma,am. Wanna be like b you when I grow up.

Happy Sunday! Lol! I wanna be like you when I grow up.

IyawoToBe:
It is well with you both and I pray God restores peace into your home.

Most of the problems we face in our homes can be avoided/solved with PATIENCE. Trust me on this, I learnt the hard way. It just takes one of you to give that ultimate sacrifice. Try it.

Awww there there iyawotobe.. Ma sunkun mo. Pele . It is well. Patience is the greatest virtue in any Union I agree. I wish them well too.

Ewuro4:


Awww there there iyawotobe.. Ma sunkun mo. Pele . It is well. Patience is the greatest virtue in any Union I agree. I wish them well too.

fem29:


Hmm mutter my husband said he is sure our a man posting as female, and he is a typical naija man.

Your comments always weigh heavily on the side of men, anything that happens you always make it the woman's fault

Please assure him I am very much a woman, just that I like to be objective.

Well now that the story has unfolded some more it is clear I was not weighing heavily on the mens side.
Look how this woman keeps on and on even when her husband came on here, she goes on.
No shame, no regard for her husband or her kid`s. This is a disgrace.
Even in law there is room for provocation and if you make a man mad enough, he can get away with murder. So let us be kind to tell the woman the truth. She ought to apologize to the man..
I don`t blame the man coming out here to defend himself if he reads the one-sided flow of information here.
By the way OP why could you not hear the door bell at 9 in the night.

Why should anyone advise the man to hold the keys to his home. He can have one , yes. But as long as there are people at home, why should he use the key?
When a husband/ father comes home- the proper thing is for the wife to open the door and welcome him with a smile and a kiss , hug
How could she be sleeping when the man was out.
I always know when my husband is back even if I don`t hear his car. I just have the feeling that he is coming home, that is how it functions in a home.
But maybe she was busy finishing her call with one of her lovers that she did not hear the door.
It is a big question to me why the man would want the little girl to wait up for him? That is child abuse and this was also supported by the woman because it was her failure to do her duty that lead to this suggestion.
What a shame, a marriage with two kid`s and still basics are an issue.

Mutter,look at what u r typing.
If u wanna be objective,r these points of ur okay?
So she won't sleep again?
U can wait for ur hubby to come home any time.
I don't wait. I feel like sleeping,i sleep.
He has d key to d whole house and can enter from any angle.

I'm a very objective person but u seems not to make sense at all.
Let it go pls.

moca:
Mutter,look at what u r typing.
If u wanna be objective,r these points of ur okay?
So she won't sleep again?
U can wait for ur hubby to come home any time.
I don't wait. I feel like sleeping,i sleep.
He has d key to d whole house and can enter from any angle.

I'm a very objective person but u seems not to make sense at all.
Let it go pls.

At nine!
Yes a wife and mother has sleepless nights.
First with the husband and then with the sons. That is what it takes to be a wife and a mother. When my big boy`s are out or my husband, I don`t sleep till they get back. Even if they have a key.
Because I want to make sure they are okay. Do you know how often people have been shot down just outside their house btw! Why would a man spend an hour trying to enter his own house.
This is sad.
Please if you have been going to sleep when your husband is out it is time to make a change.
Even she could have dozed of in the sitting room but not put on your PJ `s and tuck into bed.

Bwahahahaha!

mutter:

Please assure him I am very much a woman, just that I like to be objective.

Well now that the story has unfolded some more it is clear I was not weighing heavily on the mens side.
Look how this woman keeps on and on even when her husband came on here, she goes on.
No shame, no regard for her husband or her kid`s. This is a disgrace.
Even in law there is room for provocation and if you make a man mad enough, he can get away with murder. So let us be kind to tell the woman the truth. She ought to apologize to the man..
I don`t blame the man coming out here to defend himself if he reads the one-sided flow of information here.
By the way OP why could you not hear the door bell at 9 in the night.

Why should anyone advise the man to hold the keys to his home. He can have one , yes. But as long as there are people at home, why should he use the key?
When a husband/ father comes home- the proper thing is for the wife to open the door and welcome him with a smile and a kiss , hug
How could she be sleeping when the man was out.
I always know when my husband is back even if I don`t hear his car. I just have the feeling that he is coming home, that is how it functions in a home.
But maybe she was busy finishing her call with one of her lovers that she did not hear the door.
It is a big question to me why the man would want the little girl to wait up for him? That is child abuse and this was also supported by the woman because it was her failure to do her duty that lead to this suggestion.
What a shame, a marriage with two kid`s and still basics are an issue.

Mutter abeg not EVERY WOMAN IS YOU. My husband comes home much earlier but he has a key, he lets himself in, sometimes am awake sometimes am not, and he hasn't and won't hit me for that.

If we are to believe her he beat her and collect led her phone to post that, both of them need counseling its not all on her.

Anyway you are far too gone to seat back and reason with mere mortal wives. As a super woman who breas-t feed 9 kids for 2 years each, make fresh soup every day and do so many other super womanly things its hard to understand some of us are not so super

mutter:

Please assure him I am very much a woman, just that I like to be objective.

Well now that the story has unfolded some more it is clear I was not weighing heavily on the mens side.
Look how this woman keeps on and on even when her husband came on here, she goes on.
No shame, no regard for her husband or her kid`s. This is a disgrace.
Even in law there is room for provocation and if you make a man mad enough, he can get away with murder. So let us be kind to tell the woman the truth. She ought to apologize to the man..
I don`t blame the man coming out here to defend himself if he reads the one-sided flow of information here.
By the way OP why could you not hear the door bell at 9 in the night.

Why should anyone advise the man to hold the keys to his home. He can have one , yes. But as long as there are people at home, why should he use the key?
When a husband/ father comes home- the proper thing is for the wife to open the door and welcome him with a smile and a kiss , hug
How could she be sleeping when the man was out.
I always know when my husband is back even if I don`t hear his car. I just have the feeling that he is coming home, that is how it functions in a home.
But maybe she was busy finishing her call with one of her lovers that she did not hear the door.
It is a big question to me why the man would want the little girl to wait up for him? That is child abuse and this was also supported by the woman because it was her failure to do her duty that lead to this suggestion.
What a shame, a marriage with two kid`s and still basics are an issue.

Grandma mutter

I kuku like am

I had to ditch my phone to use my laptop to read all the controversies here and believe you me, this is the first time I will do such. I read the whole story from page 1 to this very page. Initially when i saw this topic, i refused to comment. I hate threads where women demonize men. They were becoming too rampant on this section. I won't lie o, the part that got me laughing was He knocked we couldn't hear because the generator was on, we finally opened, he stormed in with two canes and started beating a 12 year old that was helping watch d kids all day and might be tired. was one intended for the househelp and one for wife only God knows but i think with husband coming out to give us an insight into the whole bruhaha, i think wife needs to be more respectful, responsible and patient. Husband has anger issues but i think both parties can settle their differences. The issue of Ex's coming to break marriages of their former partner is becoming unpalatable. Once you are married, cut off communication ties with your former partners. Delete their phone numbers, if possible change your mobile no. All these sacrifices are neccesarry for both parties so as to build trust. If you are a man or woman out there putting asunders in other people's marriages, you would also experience such in your own. What goes around comes around. Some people here choose to be on the offensive while some on the defensive but above all, i think it's highly inappropriate to make jest of other people's family palava. If you have nothing to offer, don't ridicule them except if they display a high level of stupidity.

aisha2:


Mutter abeg not EVERY WOMAN IS YOU. My husband comes home much earlier but he has a key, he lets himself in, sometimes am awake sometimes am not, and he hasn't and won't hit me for that.

If we are to believe her he beat her and collect led her phone to post that, both of them need counseling its not all on her.

Anyway you are far too gone to seat back and reason with mere mortal wives. As a super woman who breas-t feed 9 kids for 2 years each, make fresh soup every day and do so many other super womanly things its hard to understand some of us are not so super

Wow so it is true. She once said she raised seven sons. I didn't believe her then


Mutter did you really have nine kids abi na one of those your funny gists?

aisha2:


Mutter abeg not EVERY WOMAN IS YOU. My husband comes home much earlier but he has a key, he lets himself in, sometimes am awake sometimes am not, and he hasn't and won't hit me for that.

If we are to believe her he beat her and collect led her phone to post that, both of them need counseling its not all on her.

Anyway you are far too gone to seat back and reason with mere mortal wives. As a super woman who breas-t feed 9 kids for 2 years each, make fresh soup every day and do so many other super womanly things its hard to understand some of us are not so super

Done a good research but let me correct you.
- not all my kid`s wanted to breast feed for 2 years, in fact I had two kid`s that rejected the breast completely after they got the first bottle. And with one baby I just did not have enough milk, and I tried everything.
- Secondly, please lt me know the date of the post when I had 9 kid`s , probably is quite old, because I am not yet in menopause

@ aisha I certainly am a very weak mum because I can`t sleep when my kid`s or husband are out. There are times when my boys come back very late, that I spend the whole night crying and praying that the come back safe. I am too worried to even be angry with them at that moment. I wish sometimes I was a super mum that could just go to bed and have a good night sleep. You need to imagine how it is when on a friday you are just worn out with the weeks work, the kid`s and their homework and you think you can just get a good nights sleep

cococandy:

Wow so it is true. She once said she raised seven sons. I didn't believe her then


Mutter did you really have nine kids abi na one of those your funny gists?

I have no issue with the number of kids she has but she should realise that so many of us are mere mortals amd can't be on the same pedestal with her and it isn't a crime not to be so super

mutter:


Done a good research but let me correct you.
- not all my kid`s wanted to breast feed for 2 years, in fact I had two kid`s that rejected the breast completely after they got the first bottle. And with one baby I just did not have enough milk, and I tried everything.
- Secondly, please lt me know the date of the post when I had 9 kid`s , probably is quite old, because I am not yet in menopause

@ aisha I certainly am a very weak mum because I can`t sleep when my kid`s or husband are out. There are times when my boys come back very late, that I spend the whole night crying and praying that the come back safe. I am too worried to even be angry with them at that moment. I wish sometimes I was a super mum that could just go to bed and have a good night sleep. You need to imagine how it is when on a friday you are just worn out with the weeks work, the kid`s and their homework and you think you can just get a good nights sleep

Thank God you like all others have your weakness, if she can't be awake every night to welcome him with a kiss and hug she hasn't earned beating and its no crime.

Marriage takes work by both parties and it only works when two work together. Making it seem like a crime for not being perfect all the time is too much work for any woman

cococandy:

Wow so it is true. She once said she raised seven sons. I didn't believe her then


Mutter did you really have nine kids abi na one of those your funny gists?

My funny gist! Some of you must think I have a very vivid imagination!
I haven`t finished raising those boys. The last one is still in nursery, so A luta continua!- The struggle continues!

aisha2:


Thank God you like all others have your weakness, if she can't be awake every night to welcome him with a kiss and hug she hasn't earned beating and its no crime.

Marriage takes work by both parties and it only works when two work together. Making it seem like a crime for not being perfect all the time is too much work for any woman

Well the man narrated a list of "offences" that provoked him.
However nothing justifies a man beating a woman! or anyone beating anyone.

mutter:


My funny gist! Some of you must think I have a very vivid imagination!
I haven`t finished raising those boys. The last one is still in nursery, so A luta continua!- The struggle continues!

yes funny gist like that one you told the other day on the peeing by the roadside thread.

Anyway you're right alutacontinua.
Godspeed in your motherhood struggles.
Seven or nine kids can't be easy

mutter:


Well the man narrated a list of "offences" that provoked him.
However nothing justifies a man beating a woman! or anyone beating anyone.

So to be clear its okay for him to get back pounce on a little girl and his wife while trying to shield her?

Also she has also denied his accusations. What we should be advising is that they both get help amd save whats left of their bitter situation rather than stand and take sides then demonise one party for not acting like a super being

aisha2:


I have no issue with the number of kids she has but she should realise that so many of us are mere mortals amd can't be on the same pedestal with her and it isn't a crime not to be so super

Leave talk. If mutter is really a babe, she can't do half of what she types here. Na Magic?

cococandy:


Leave talk. If mutter is really a babe, she can't do half of what she types here. Na Magic?

My own is that unlike most threads both husband and wife are on this thread so advice should be balanced and geared towards saving the situation and protecting their child and not bashing, blasting and making either spouse feel foolish and the othet justified

cococandy:


Leave talk. If mutter is really a babe, she can't do half of what she types here. Na Magic?

Okay this is really OT
But quite honestly allot of people ask me how I do it and I just give them the same answer I will give you now-

One day at a time.

and not nine but eleven.

mutter:


Okay this is really OT
But quite honestly allot of people ask me how I do it and I just give them the same answer I will give you now-

One day at a time.

and not nine but eleven.

Wow wonderful. You are strong.
However here is the challenge, you expect that if you have done it any woman who says she cant do it is lazy and a bad wife.

Me for example know I can't manage more than two, if tomorrow my husband comes on line to complain that I don't want more than 2 kids you will call me lazy, write how you have have 11 and I am selfish for wanting two. You wont bother to find out if there are health issues affecting my decision or if we agreed on that number you will normally just rush in abuse the woman and even in some cases advice the man to marry a second wife to teach me a lesson forgetting that I am not mutter

aisha2:


Wow wonderful. You are strong.
However here is the challenge, you expect that if you have done it any woman who says she cant do it is lazy and a bad wife.

Me for example know I can't manage more than two, if tomorrow my husband comes on line to complain that I don't want more than 2 kids you will call me lazy, write how you have have 11 and I am selfish for wanting two. You wont bother to find out if there are health issues affecting my decision or if we agreed on that number you will normally just rush in abuse the woman and even in some cases advice the man to marry a second wife to teach me a lesson forgetting that I am not mutter

God forbid. The more kid`s you have, the more you become aware of all that can go wrong. At a certain stage during labour you hang between life and death. Then there is the mental issue. Post natal depression can be a real health risk. This is one thing that is sadly not taken seriously in Nigeria and even in the western world.
Besides this was something I and my husband both wanted, which is rarely the case.
Well perhaps I should not judge everything.
But maybe it just is a habit we have, because when I come home late, my husband does not go to bed till I come, although I meet him sleeping on the sofa.
There was a night I had to fly to Nigeria and come back the same day. I got back at 3 in the morning and called him to pick me from the airport. He was sleeping and did not hear the call. That upset me real bad. This happened years back.

mutter:


God forbid. The more kid`s you have, the more you become aware of all that can go wrong. At a certain stage during labour you hang between life and death. Then there is the mental issue. Post natal depression can be a real health risk. This is one thing that is sadly not taken seriously in Nigeria and even in the western world.
Besides this was something I and my husband both wanted, which is rarely the case.
Well perhaps I should not judge everything.
But maybe it just is a habit we have, because when I come home late, my husband does not go to bed till I come, although I meet him sleeping on the sofa.
There was a night I had to fly to Nigeria and come back the same day. I got back at 3 in the morning and called him to pick me from the airport. He was sleeping and did not hear the call. That upset me real bad. This happened years back.

You see now your husband does same for you and it goes back to my point that marriage takes two. Some people say they cant spend on their husband's but I can spend my last dime on mine and never regret it because of the kind of amazing man he has been to me. Not everyone is in our situation, if they were they wouldn't come to nairaland for help. If you and I are blessed with good spouses we should use it positively to help those not so blessed rather than judge them and accuse them of causing the issues