Please Nairalanders i need your advice before i make a big mistake.

I started dating this guy since mid 2013 but at that time he was studying outside the country. I have known the guy growing up, we talked about marriage over the phone and he decided to send his parents over for introduction at my house which my dad objected to and after much pleading he agreed . this was in October 2013. he was supposed to have been back to conclude the marriage but because of some issues he couldn't make it back till September 2014.

Before the Intro we practically dissolved every relationship we were into and he told me he has become celibate and i did likewise. Since he got back i believed in him, trying to understand him even thou we don't live in the same state. A few days ago i told him to apply the breaks on the traditional rites thing till he settles down that i want it to be done at once. When he came back he gave me access to his email to reply a job email which he ended up getting, he also insisted that i keep checking his mails to see if there are anymore replies.

At one point, i stumbled on an email with a girl saying how much they miss each other, i confronted him and he got upset and told me he was just pulling my legs that he knew i would check the mail. When i decided to shut down the mailbox, He insisted on me checking and replying his emails until he settles down in his new job. A few days back i was shutting down from the office and i don't no what prompted me to check his email especially the sent mails. I stumbled on one where he was telling his friend about girl A that he "would have been patient and that it hurts not marrying the girl he loves so much and understands".

For girl B he told him "that he wishes the could travel to some country with her" and the guy replies that "he knows shes his Achilles heels but that he will see white chics to have fun with". The trip in question is an all expense paid trip for him and he told me in passing that he would have wished he could go with me but that he doesn't have money.

For girl C, i saw a whole trail of mails he exchanged with her and this was during the period he said he was been "celibate". he met with this girl almost every Saturday even told her that when he returns back to that country that she will come and visit him in the hotel. I was supposed to also go with him to that trip which when he couldn't come back i got a visa and because i got the visa on the day of his event he said it was of no need coming again. A family friend wanted to sponsor me but he refused me coming. Even till September 2014 he was still sleeping with her and sending naughty messages till he came back.

Now, i don't trust him anymore and cant live with someone i cant trust. He couldn't even compromise and come to spend val with me. on my birthday last year, my sister asked me a question "so that your fiance cannot ask his friends to buy a cake for you? I had family issues, spoke to him and for over a month he hasn't asked what's up. Lest i forget he is yet to put a ring on my finger, still saying he doesnt have money but that he will surprise me.

The truth is i want to hear your thoughts. No insults

Be patient with him whenever things sto working for him and the other gurl he will turn to you.

Touching ..
I think that is a past story now, try and focus on yourself.
Remember he is man ;Body nor be firewood

awesomechic:
Please Nairalanders i need your advice before i make a big mistake.

I started dating this guy since mid 2013 but at that time he was studying outside the country. I have known the guy growing up, we talked about marriage over the phone and he decided to send his parents over for introduction at my house which my dad objected to and after much pleading he agreed . this was in October 2013. he was supposed to have been back to conclude the marriage but because of some issues he couldn't make it back till September 2014.

Before the Intro we practically dissolved every relationship we were into and he told me he has become celibate and i did likewise. Since he got back i believed in him, trying to understand him even thou we don't live in the same state. A few days ago i told him to apply the breaks on the traditional rites thing till he settles down that i want it to be done at once. When he came back he gave me access to his email to reply a job email which he ended up getting, he also insisted that i keep checking his mails to see if there are anymore replies.

At one point, i stumbled on an email with a girl saying how much they miss each other, i confronted him and he got upset and told me he was just pulling my legs that he knew i would check the mail. When i decided to shut down the mailbox, He insisted on me checking and replying his emails until he settles down in his new job. A few days back i was shutting down from the office and i don't no what prompted me to check his email especially the sent mails. I stumbled on one where he was telling his friend about girl A that he "would have been patient and that it hurts not marrying the girl he loves so much and understands".

For girl B he told him "that he wishes the could travel to some country with her" and the guy replies that "he knows shes his Achilles heels but that he will see white chics to have fun with". The trip in question is an all expense paid trip for him and he told me in passing that he would have wished he could go with me but that he doesn't have money.

For girl C, i saw a whole trail of mails he exchanged with her and this was during the period he said he was been "celibate". he met with this girl almost every Saturday even told her that when he returns back to that country that she will come and visit him in the hotel. I was supposed to also go with him to that trip which when he couldn't come back i got a visa and because i got the visa on the day of his event he said it was of no need coming again. A family friend wanted to sponsor me but he refused me coming. Even till September 2014 he was still sleeping with her and sending naughty messages till he came back.

Now, i don't trust him anymore and cant live with someone i cant trust. He couldn't even compromise and come to spend val with me. on my birthday last year, my sister asked me a question "so that your fiance cannot ask his friends to buy a cake for you? I had family issues, spoke to him and for over a month he hasn't asked what's up. Lest i forget he is yet to put a ring on my finger, still saying he doesnt have money but that he will surprise me.

The truth is i want to hear your thoughts. No insults

Even though he ends up disappointing you,all na surprise

Aunty am a guy i wont lie too you u better start looking for a replacment is like he his feed up with u and he does not have the courage to tell u thats why he gave u access to his mail cuz he know u will eventually see things that will hot ur fellings and u might angry and call of the relationship thats my point i stood to be corrected

There is fire on the mountain run! run!! run!!!

I will comment after am through with Burnaboy-Rockstar

That surprise he dey talk of na vexing break up o

A failed relationship is better than a broken marriage, u ur tongue 2 count ur teeth

jst move on mam

[b]Why are you guys encouraging her to manage mediocrity...is it becos they guy travels abroad as per his job's requirement, that her guy is rich enh or what...why don't you let her see the hand writings on the wall

Na wa o! You guys even telling her to stay glue to her guy because guys are scares abi?...now I know that girls of now really value material things over true love (even if their boyfriend is an assassin they don't care so far he has the money.

TO THE OP...
He gave you this his email password for you to choke yourself and end the relationship

If he was truly clean he would have apologize and avoid further mistakes

Yet he keeps on repeating because he wants you to end the relationship by yourself.. (How best do u wanna see the sign that he is tired)

Dear OP do try to initiate a one on one discussion after with him after which... Please end it all and seek the face of God..distance relationships takes God's grace to work weather you are reach or poor![/b]

Even with all the evidence in the world you are still asking questions like this. And one correct, faithful guy somewhere is hoping you'd look his way. Continue in your relationship. Maybe it's because you deserve all the hurt and drama that you're stuck on a cheat.

Truth is bitter!

The guy doesn't love u enough.
I don't see him marrying u.
I don't see him being committed to one girl or settling down soon!

Move on or u remain d main chick wit several side chicks.
and know this also, if u decide to go wit option 2, u can b displaced one day from your position as d main chick on c 'Chicks Table'

he allowed you access into a mail that could expose his philandering attitude.


someone should wake me up

U r on a long thing if u tink he is still 100% attached.....maybe 25 sha

awesomechic:
Please Nairalanders i need your advice before i make a big mistake.

I started dating this guy since mid 2013 but at that time he was studying outside the country. I have known the guy growing up, we talked about marriage over the phone and he decided to send his parents over for introduction at my house which my dad objected to and after much pleading he agreed . this was in October 2013. he was supposed to have been back to conclude the marriage but because of some issues he couldn't make it back till September 2014.

Before the Intro we practically dissolved every relationship we were into and he told me he has become celibate and i did likewise. Since he got back i believed in him, trying to understand him even thou we don't live in the same state. A few days ago i told him to apply the breaks on the traditional rites thing till he settles down that i want it to be done at once. When he came back he gave me access to his email to reply a job email which he ended up getting, he also insisted that i keep checking his mails to see if there are anymore replies.

At one point, i stumbled on an email with a girl saying how much they miss each other, i confronted him and he got upset and told me he was just pulling my legs that he knew i would check the mail. When i decided to shut down the mailbox, He insisted on me checking and replying his emails until he settles down in his new job. A few days back i was shutting down from the office and i don't no what prompted me to check his email especially the sent mails. I stumbled on one where he was telling his friend about girl A that he "would have been patient and that it hurts not marrying the girl he loves so much and understands".

For girl B he told him "that he wishes the could travel to some country with her" and the guy replies that "he knows shes his Achilles heels but that he will see white chics to have fun with". The trip in question is an all expense paid trip for him and he told me in passing that he would have wished he could go with me but that he doesn't have money.

For girl C, i saw a whole trail of mails he exchanged with her and this was during the period he said he was been "celibate". he met with this girl almost every Saturday even told her that when he returns back to that country that she will come and visit him in the hotel. I was supposed to also go with him to that trip which when he couldn't come back i got a visa and because i got the visa on the day of his event he said it was of no need coming again. A family friend wanted to sponsor me but he refused me coming. Even till September 2014 he was still sleeping with her and sending naughty messages till he came back.

Now, i don't trust him anymore and cant live with someone i cant trust. He couldn't even compromise and come to spend val with me. on my birthday last year, my sister asked me a question "so that your fiance cannot ask his friends to buy a cake for you? I had family issues, spoke to him and for over a month he hasn't asked what's up. Lest i forget he is yet to put a ring on my finger, still saying he doesnt have money but that he will surprise me.

The truth is i want to hear your thoughts. No insults

once there is no trust in a relationship.it is as good as dead.please move on.

He could be trying to measure up your level of trust for him

Btw, who would give you access to his mail when he has something to hide therein.

Be wise, follow your heart still!

Babe RUN FOR UR LIFE AND GIVE another MAN A chance, THAT WAS How I WASTED 5years loving one guy even when I knew he was cheating. I KEPT believing That He Will change, But He never Did.

holatin:
he allowed you access into a mail that could expose his philandering attitude.


someone should wake me up

Oya, wake up

He allowed her access so that she could break up with him. Remember they have done "introduction" so maybe the guy doesn't want to tell her it's over.

Op, pele!

LadyX:

Oya, wake up

He allowed her access so that she could break up with him. Remember they have done "introduction" so maybe the guy doesn't want to tell her it's over.

Op, pele!

who does dat.

op d op is not a side chick under hallucination

I have invited him over so i can put it to his face. Because i wasn't sounding like me he has decided to come. Am asking, If he flares up (definitely) and apologizes, should i forgive? should i not break up? Apparently he's still hung over a girl and he's yet to grow up.

FYI he's not rich.

awesomechic,

He gave you access to his E-mail address for you to see things, get angry, ask this question, seek advice, read my advice and leave him alone.

Hope you understood.

somehow complex case considering d fact dat he gave you d password and even encouraged you to use the mail frequently. The guy might be using reverse psychology on you. Confront him and ask him to explain but don't be swayed by bullshit. If he gets angry don't be cowed. maintain ur stance dat no sane lady will see such messages in her prospective husband's email and still jump into the marriage. Two other ladies is too much for a man who has taken d first step of introduction. Maybe he is getting cold feet about marrying you. all d best.

[quote
author=onyiim post=30875777]Babe RUN FOR UR LIFE AND GIVE another MAN A
chance, THAT WAS How I WASTED 5years loving one guy even when I knew he
was cheating. I KEPT believing That He Will change, But He never Did.
[/quote]
ahhh my dear i thot i was d only one in this..i wasted same 5yrs jare...dear op u dnt nid a priest to tel u certain tins..make hay