koife:
She Said White Wedding In Her Church Or Nothing by koife(m): 4:41pm
I met this young Lady some years ago, fell in love with her and finally proposed last year. I decided to make neccesary findings so as to get the whole deal through, but hit a serious brick wall. She said that the tradition in her church and family is that the man does the wedding in her church or nothing ...her mother isn't helping issues. My dad is a Bishop in a church that doesn't believe in white wedding talk less of going to another church to do it. I had a chitchat with him and he declared to me in confidence that I am the man and I should be the shot caller. The downside is that if I dare try it, my dad will be excommunicated. Having seen the danger that lies ahead I confided in my father that we can take the so call white wedding to a neutral place outside the walls of her church so not to give my church the reason to lynch my dad. I disscued this with her but she and most esp her mom aren't giving my proposal a thought. First her mother has nothing to loose been that the proximity will be such that her friends and colleague will still turn in their numbers..since her reasons in the first place was because she wanted a good attendance esp from people within her church circle and that she has been attending peoples wedding and they all are waiting for her daughters and that I can't afford to dash her own chance of inviting people.I find this very selfish....considering the fact that she hasn't given thought about my faith and what will happen to my dad...hence my proposal for a neutral place. I am very confused as I write and really want some good advise here.....
Pls I beg you, it a thing of the heart...
Kindly ignore if you don't have any reasonable contribution
Tnx
(Mod

Cutehector:
Guy, seriously dis thread can't be void of bashin cuz u really need bashing!


R u a man?

If yes den act like one!

Jaraworldsms:
Still insist on the neutral location,her parent wont be the one to fund the wedding. White wedding is funded by the grooms family. your dad position is very important as well.Her parent should understand. If they dont accept it,marry from your faith.period.

koife:

U just don't get it..do u

Cutehector:
get wat? D fact dat she gvs d op a lifeline dat this it how it should be or the op can't tell her wat to do. Please make me understand

Basildvalour:
If I were to be the man, I'll give her NOTHING

There are plenty fishes in the canal where she came from

koife:

...and we can't catch all the fish everytime

Basildvalour:
No bro, its one SERIOUS fish at a time

PrettyDian:
my dear run!dis kin moda inlaw myt want to control ya lyf...if she truly luvs u she will marry anywer u choose...also it seems her mom is telling her wat to do
mummie’s gal!

MzzTega:
You really do have your father at heart,and i guess they know about your father's status.
Can you act as if you are no longer interested atleast for now. Let's see their reaction,if they'll give in.

koife:

If I give that...then I would have to let go the whole process....twill imply they are desperadoes.......

sinizia:
This is a tough one, OP.

This is the time to make a decision as a man. You're the leader here, and it's your marriage, so you'll have to choose what's best for both you and your intending wife.

You're caught up in dilemma, and if you want to do what's right, the only opinion you have to consider is yours and your girl's. Your dad shouldn't and can't be blamed for your actions. Bishop or no Bishop!! Don't be afraid of your dad being excommunicated. If his church does that, then they are not a good church. They're brainless. Since your mind is made up on a neutral venue and your girl's mom will not have any of it, I guess it's time for your girl to grow up and take the bull by the horn. She can't be a mummy's pet for life. You've made your sacrifice by choosing a neutral ground, if your girl ain't ready to do her's, count your losses and move on with your life. There are other fishes in the ocean. Marriage is not do-or-die affair.

amguud:
U hav ur father, his status n options @heart
She has her mother, her status n options @heart...
Its 1:1..
And stop tryna blame it on one side.
Normal naija wil say d wedding be done in d girl's church since u are coming to take her away frm dem.. (dey call it an act of respect for whr she comes from).
So I dont blame her mum afterall its her dota's wedding. ..she wana make d news just like everyoda moda of d bride weda @ur xpens or nt.

Talk to ur bishop daddy to win his pple's heart its just a mata of merely 3hrs activity...nobody wil die (afteral titles dont guarantee we make heaven)...
U pliz d mom for just one day event (ontop ur money), shez gona hav no choice to pliz u afterwards...... u ar d man.. u dcide.

koife:

So are you advising I go ahead with my parents in absentia? Which pastor will even conduct the white wedding without seeing both parent....do you quite understanding what it means for parents to grace your ocassion. The little I know is that they ask for parents consent before any nuptial ties... I have tried my best

mulattoclaro:
Bro dump the girl and walk away. They're many fishes in the river. My bro girls plenty. The beautiful ones are not yet born. You're even the one doing her a favour by marrying her. I still don't understand why you guys are crazy over nigerian girls? I'm married to a Brazilian woman and believe me I didn't go through all these stress you're going through.

koife:

I am really thinking hard .....my parents and siblings are down to frustrate me if I try it...and you know in African ways yove got to get the both FAM along..if not you end up making them hate you and your wify....they are all twlling me they wont come and that we shall see how any mog wil go ahead without both parents in agreement/attandant...they said,i have shifted my grounds to choosing a neutral place where she can wear the so call white cloth, but she ain't shifting hers.
I just might.........

koife:
She Said White Wedding In Her Church Or Nothing by koife(m): 4:41pm
I met this young Lady some years ago, fell in love with her and finally proposed last year. I decided to make neccesary findings so as to get the whole deal through, but hit a serious brick wall. She said that the tradition in her church and family is that the man does the wedding in her church or nothing ...her mother isn't helping issues. My dad is a Bishop in a church that doesn't believe in white wedding talk less of going to another church to do it. I had a chitchat with him and he declared to me in confidence that I am the man and I should be the shot caller. The downside is that if I dare try it, my dad will be excommunicated. Having seen the danger that lies ahead I confided in my father that we can take the so call white wedding to a neutral place outside the walls of her church so not to give my church the reason to lynch my dad. I disscued this with her but she and most esp her mom aren't giving my proposal a thought. First her mother has nothing to loose been that the proximity will be such that her friends and colleague will still turn in their numbers..since her reasons in the first place was because she wanted a good attendance esp from people within her church circle and that she has been attending peoples wedding and they all are waiting for her daughters and that I can't afford to dash her own chance of inviting people.I find this very selfish....considering the fact that she hasn't given thought about my faith and what will happen to my dad...hence my proposal for a neutral place. I am very confused as I write and really want some good advise here.....
Pls I beg you, it a thing of the heart...
Kindly ignore if you don't have any reasonable contribution
Tnx
(Mod

Jaraworldsms:
Still insist on the neutral location,her parent wont be the one to fund the wedding. White wedding is funded by the grooms family. your dad position is very important as well.Her parent should understand. If they dont accept it,marry from your faith.period.

koife:

I have lost weight in the last few months....I can't concentrate. Thnx man