Was surfing the internet when I came across these hilarious riddles... Have fun www.buzzfeed.com/regajha/riddles-that-will-prove-you-have-a-filthy-mind

1. What goes in dry and hard, but
comes out wet and soft?

Chewing gum, you perv!
2. Your finger fits right in it. You
play with it when you’re bored.
Once you’re married, you’re stuck
with the same one forever. What is
it?

A ring! Get your mind out of the gutter!
3. What’s at least 6 inches long,
goes in your mouth, and is more
fun if it vibrates?

A TOOTHBRUSH. COME ON.
4. You play with it at night before
bed. You can’t be seen fiddling
with it at work. You only let very,
very special people touch it. What
is it?
Your smart phone! DUH.
5. What’s long and hard and has
cum in it?

A cuCUMber. Haha, got you.
6. What does every woman have
that starts with a “V” and that she
can use to get what she wants?

Her VOICE, you sexist axxhole.
7. What goes up, lets out a load,
and then goes back down?

An elevator. You're a disgusting human
being.
8. What do men keep in their pants
that their partners sometimes
blow?

MONEY. Your mind is basically a citizen
of the gutter.
9. What’s made of rubber, handed
out at some schools, and exists to
prevent mistakes?

ERASERS. Safety first, kiddos!
10. People think these are better
when they’re longer, but short
ones can be really powerful, too,
and there is totally such a thing as
TOO long. What are they?

TWEETS. 140 characters is not enough
to express how gross your imagination
is.
11. What’s most useful when it’s
long and hard?

A college education.
12. Arnold Schwarzenegger’s is
really long. Michael J. Fox’s is really
short. Mickey Mouse’s isn’t human.
Madonna doesn’t have one. What is
it?

A last name. Did you really think... Oh
my god.
13. If you put three fingers into
these holes, it’s gonna be a
shocker. What am I talking about?

A POWER OUTLET. BECAUSE THAT
WOULD GIVE YOU AN ELECTRIC SHOCK.
DON'T DO IT.
14. What starts with “p” and ends
with “orn” and is the hottest part
of the movie industry?
POPCORN, OBVIOUSLY.
15. It’s fun to do, but you hate
knowing your parents do it, too.
What is it?

FACEBOOK. WOW. You're so twisted.
16. Every man has one, some are
big, some are small. Blowing them
feels great, but they drip if you
aren’t careful. What are they?

Noses. They're noses. Why would you
even think... Ugh.
17. What gets longer when pulled,
fits between breasts, slides neatly
into a hole, has choked people
when used improperly, and works
best when jerked?

Seatbelts. Ew, man.
18. What’s white, gooey, sticky,
and better to spit than to swallow?

Toothpaste. Dental hygiene is so
important. You sick freak.
19. What gets wetter when things
get steamy?

Steam boats! An integral part of the
evolution of marine travel!
20. They’re powerful and fun,
especially when you put your
fingers in them. What are they?

Bowling balls! Hahahahahahahaha. I
know what you were thinking...
21. Some people prefer being on
top, others prefer being on the
bottom, and it always involves a
bed.

A BUNK-BED. Dumbass.
22. What’s squishy, bouncy, and
comes in pairs?

Two bunnies!
23. You get a lot of it if you’re
important and successful, you get
less when you’re just starting out.
You sometimes do it with yourself
if you need to, but it’s a lot better
when it’s with other people.

Email. Calm down.
24. What’s beautiful and natural,
but gets prickly if it isn’t trimmed
regularly?

Grass. Like, on a lawn. Your brain is
such a nasty place.
25. What’s messy and difficult to
clean up after sex?

FEELINGS. Yeah. Bet you feel like a dick
now

Funny but still bullshit.


www.

Rubbish

Hmmm

Op,i disagree wit ur no6 oo,nt evrywoman has fine voice jooor.som sef their voices b like d 1st element for periodic table