Marriage counsellors normally advise that partners
know themselves before tying the nuptial knot. This
period of observation is called courtship – when
partners get to know more about themselves. However,
people are of the opinion that no matter how long a
courtship is, partners seldom get to know everything
about themselves. In the light of this, SATURDAY PUNCH
asked some people what their actions will be if they find
out after wedding that their spouses belong to a cult
group or an armed robbery gang

It’s dangerous living with a dangerous man
No one should ever live with an armed robber or a
cultist. I think there may come a time when they will
fight among themselves and what they do usually is to
take revenge on the innocent – their loved ones. If my
husband is a cultist, I’ll find every means to quit the
relationship. In this kind of scenario, separation will not
be out of hand. By continuing to live with him, I am only
endangering my life and that of my children. It’s very
dangerous living with a dangerous man.
Opeyemi Olosunde-Jooda

I’ll report him, probably
By discovering about his true nature myself, that means
he is not ready to repent. If he had repented, he would
have told me this as part of his past when we were in
courtship. He would have apologised for all he did and
he would have been remorseful. Finding out on my own
means I am endangering my own life. Seriously, it is a
complicated issue and I may consider reporting him to
the police. This is also a risky thing to do, considering the
fact that his members may want to retaliate. So if I
should report him, I must have found a way of escape
forever, or at least for a long period of time.
Etolor Kemes

I’ll keep quiet
In this kind of scenario, I will ask myself, ‘What if I raise
an alarm about the situation and the police arrest us
both?’ Will they not think that we’re together and I’m
only trying to present myself as a saint? What if she too
lies against me and thinks, ‘Well, if you’re bringing me
down, I must destroy you too?’ Even personally, I will
find it weird to report her. I will stay with her and keep
quiet, because I know she can’t harm me. She’s in love
and this will even make her to be protective of me. I’ll
live my life as if nothing is happening. After all, all men
have the natural tendency to be evil.
Akande Emmanuel

I’d consider myself stupid
Before I married her, I must have known a bit about her.
I think it’s only a man who is not a good observer that
will fall into this kind of situation. Truth be told, how
could I not know my wife is a cultist or armed robber
before marrying her? I would have known her friends,
the kind of group she mixed with. I would know her
family background; I would know whether she’s a
nocturnal person, and many others. I must have carried
lots of research before being engaged to her. But if I had
done all this and still didn’t know, that means I must
have been stupid all this while. I’ll live with it since it’s my
action that has landed me in that problem.
Kehinde Oyedele

I’ll run from home someday
I cannot give a definite answer right now; it’s just too
complicated. There are so many questions that will
trouble my heart – such as whether to report him to the
security agencies, or live with it, or ask family and
friends. But all the same, I think it will be dangerous
letting so many people learn of the matter. Once I find
out, I can confront him and ask whether he wants to
repent. If he does, I can still risk living with him, but if I
see no sign of him doing that, one day, when he is not
around, I’ll pack my things and run away from him – to
where he won’t know.
Preye Inoru

Divorce could be considered
Well, divorce won’t be wrong in this kind of scenario.
This is simply because her lifestyle will affect mine
adversely and if we have kids, it will also affect them.
How can an armed robber or cultist value the lives of
her kids when she is destroying others? To militate
against any consequences in the future, it is better to
divorce her and get a new life. A new but hopeful
beginning is better than a painful story in the end.
Onoja Emmanuel

I’ll definitely quit
I will be very afraid of him. It is possible that one day,
there is a clash among rival groups. When that happens,
it’s either he gets himself killed or he’s arrested by
security operatives, thereby making him to spend the
rest of his life in prison. What kind of marriage is that?
The consequences of marrying such a person could be
so deadly, but they are avoidable. I cannot afford to live
a painful life by marrying a wrong person. We will
definitely call it quits.
Shekinnah Komere

I can’t endanger my life
That’s a very dangerous woman. That means she will be
having meetings with evil people like her and they will
always be planning of who to murder. That’s exactly the
kind of person one should not live with. It is dangerous.
Sooner or later – except she repents – she will be killed
or be arrested by the police, and that will be her end. I’m
not seeking for a brief marriage, so it’s better to end the
marriage and go our separate ways.
Olusegun Amos

I will seek counsel
The best thing to do in this matter is to seek counsel
from trusted people. I know there will be lots of
experiences by other people on how to handle the
situation. So, rather than panic and being afraid, a wise
counsel will do. While I’m doing that, I could also be
praying for a change in his life. I have to also admit that
the evil he had done could haunt my children (if we
have any) and I. All the same, I will simply seek for the
elders’ counsel and also think thoroughly before taking
any action.
Opeyemi Ayodeji

If she quits, we’ll run to a safe place
I will consider separation from her for the time being,
but that does not mean I’ll divorce her. if she’s talked to,
who knows whether she will repent? The only problem
here, however, is if she quits the group, the members
may want to harm her. If we then report to the police,
wouldn’t she be implicated likewise? It’s a complicated
issue, but I can cope with her. If she quits the group, we
can run to a safe place where she cannot be traced.
Oyekunle Oyesola

www.punchng.com/feature/adam-eve/if-you-find-out-after-wedding-that-your-spouse-is-a-cultistarmed-robber-what-will-you-do/

E no fit happen to mhe
I'll investigate everything about him very carefully before I say I do.

I will run more than 40 40

I wil try to change her

I'll put my matrimonial vows in reverse gear..

hmmmmm

cherylsmith:
E no fit happen to mhe
I'll investigate everything about him very carefully before I say I do.

seconded