HI,
FELLOW NIARALANDERS I NEED YOUR ADVICE.
I AM A YOUNG LADY STILL IN HER TWENTIES, AS AT LAST YEAR FEBUARY I DID MY COURT WEDDING JUST BEFORE MY HUSBAND TRAVELLED TO THE UK FOR HIS MBA. HE ACTUALLY CAJOLED ME INTO DOING THE WEDDING BECAUSE I WAS SCARED HE WOULD FORGET ABOUT ME AND I DIDNT WANT TO BE TIED DOWN. AT FIRST HE WAS THIS CARING MAN AND I BELIEVED THAT ALL WAS GOING TO BE WELL. BUT AS FROM NOVEMBER LAST YEAR HE STARTED BEHAVING FUNNY, HE STOPPED CALLING LIKE HE USED TO AND WHEN EVER I VISIT HIS FAMILY THEY TELL ME THAT HE HASNT CALLED THEM. RIGHT NOW I HAVE NOT HEARD FROM HIM FOR OVER 8 MONTHS. BUT I KNOW HE IS OK BECAUSE SOMEONE SAW HIM IN LONDON.
I AM SO CONFUSED AND IT PAINS ME THAT THINGS LIKE THIS STILL HAPPEN. I THOT HE WOULD BE DIFFERENT BECAUSE HE PROMISED ME THAT HE WOULD NEVA DO SUCH A THING. HE HAS CHANGED HIS NUMBER AND ADDRESS, HE DOSEN'T REPLY MY EMAILS ANYMORE.
PLS I NEED YOUR ADVICE, I KNOW THAT IF HE COMES BACK I MIGHT TAKE HIM BACK BECAUSE I LOVE HIM BUT MY HEAD IS TELLING ME TO MOVE ON. WHAT DO YOU THINK I SHOULD DO?

Hi you just need to get wiser and marriage is a lifetime commitment good or bad, so stay put and keep praying

Why not get in touch with the person that saw him at London to see if s/he would be able to get you speak to him somehow?

Ummm> There is something "fishy" about this whole situation, on the other hand it was for better or worse. Well I suggest you demand some answers first from him, if you can't reach him bombard his parents. Also as someone suggested maybe try soliciting information from the person who told you they saw him. Best of Luck,

gurl y did u get married to him before he left u should had let him come back 4 yall start the marriage stuff so stuff like this will not happen and wen it does u can move on but now u are married to him and he forgot about u> u got urself in a situation where alot of things is going thro ur head about wat he is doing. well if u move on now its like u commitin adultry damn i don't even know wat to say about that to u but just follow ur heart damn men are, imma just be quite but gurl y did u get married to him got married? that is d mistake rite there like i said before u should a let him come back

Felt for you girl. Just wnt you to knw dt nt all men are bad, or are u d one dt forced him into the marriage and if nt you try and make friend wit any of his family so as to get d fact so dt u can move on wit ur life dear.

Don't worry about someone who ain't worried about you. He changed his number it's obvious his not concern.

ILO, what is done is done, you have married him so you have the right to know why he changed his number and address by confronting his parent at home, then find a way to go over to UK or file for a divorce which I think you are not ready to do, so get yourself ready to travel abroad say UK to search for him. But his parents would be my first start, they are your in-laws and you have the right to know where he is.

this isnt funny at all. try not 2 take a rash decision. you need a very thorough meeting with his family and you may have 2 go with your guardian.as a matter of fact you belong to his family except they ask you out. dont do anything funny so they dont have an escuse.get it sorted out, life has no definition

forget him and move on, he will be da loser

hotstepper u still here

Dont say dt gee wat if d other way round.

He changed his number and address, doesn’t reply your e-mail. That can't be a good sign, but you need to be sure about what’s going on first before you move on. Ask his parent to get hold of him for you and talk. From the looks of things, he has found himself someone else.

girl i feel 4 u, its sad that u ve done this court wedding thing, london is not a place 4 a guy 2 be left alone at all, infact he will get snached from the airport with girls willing 2 help him out .the rate of desperation in london is high oh.takes the grace of god for a guy not to stray.am sure is probably shacked up with a girl.my advise go over to the UK if u can, cos no guy is worth putting your life on hold for, you have 2 know wats up and where u stand, good luck,

Babygal,so sory abt ur predicament,but remember the sayin 4 better for worse,abi,just keep prayin nd dont lose hope.I knw he is goin 2 kme back 2 you,there aint no good gals in uk,u knw,wish 4 the best nd ur guy wil b yours again

vbrown20:

Babygal,so sory about your predicament,but remember the sayin 4 better for worse,abi,just keep prayin nd don't lose hope.I knw he is goin 2 kme back 2 you,there aint no good gals in uk,u knw,wish for the best nd your guy wil b yours again

hey girl i like your giving her advice and all but wat is this about there being no good girl in UK.thats not nice, on behalf of us girls in the UK i think you owe us an apology, cos its wrong to generalise/sterotype

your situation is really confusing just hand everything into GOd's Hands

[quote ]
PLS I NEED YOUR ADVICE, I KNOW THAT IF HE COMES BACK I MIGHT TAKE HIM BACK BECAUSE I LOVE HIM BUT MY HEAD IS TELLING ME TO MOVE ON. WHAT DO YOU THINK I SHOULD DO?


[quote][/quote]

I don't think you need our adice?

Did I see someone say stay put? What a joke! You should head to the court or whereever and annul that marriage and start a new life my sister. The person you are supposedly married to has not called you in 8 months or so and changed is contact info without informing you. There is a good chance he has found somebody else. Geez! You sound a little naive though. Think about it, if he really loves you he should be in constant contact with you. it sure looks like he does not want you to be in contact with him I know love is blind blah  blah blah! But is sure is not that blind. There are just too many signs that indicate the fella has moved on.

You have whole lot of life ahead of you. Forget him (and his family)and move on with your life my sister.  Good luck!


PS. If there was a "betrayal" forum this will probably fit right in there too.

hey bossman, well said but whoa you sure know how to hit the nail on the head, am sure ur post will induce a few tears, though it will be good 4 her 2 just move on it wont be easy cos am sure her friends and family already think of her as married, will not be easy 4 her at all, lets face it our society is 2 judgemental, in other countries it easy but her whoa, its really a big step, my advice to her is that she try and get in touch with him be4 she does anything drastic.

d best tin is 4 u 2 pray n fast abt it.

mariam A:

d best tin is for you to pray n fast about it.

honey is that going to stop him, face fact he does not want you any more move on with ya life sista

wats ur pros. is dat nt a gud advice

i guess u re so hw rite abt dat.

this is about telling the truth if he cared (unless he is dead or in a hospital some where in a coma) he would have contacted her. She needs to see this be strong and move on, why should i suga coat it for her, she needs to hear the truth.

Hey lovestinks,i was not been stereotyped,ok,i knw i was not suppose 2 generalise,but my klose relation had a bad experience in the hands of london gals,wat else do u xpect we back home 2 tink?Am sorry if u were affected,k.kudos.keep up the good work.

hmmm, am sorry for that, you are wrong from the start and wrong throughout. from what you said I can deduce the following:

1. You are not really familiar with the family
2. You only did the court wedding which may have just few of your friends in attendance
3. You dont really know the guy
4. Cant see why the marriage took place in d first place

listen, the best wedding is court wedding, it is easy to go into and easy to come out. This guy doesnt love u a bit, one really need to know circustances that surrounded your marriage, Its either he married you to gain something or you did for same reason.

solution

Go back to his family, join hands with them to locate him if its true they dont know his whereabout, if u have the money go to UK as people suggested, if u cant get him file in divorce in the court stating those reasons and his family as your witness but I must add you need his family, they will help you out.

i feel for u, dont be quick to make decision, go to d family let them tell u whats is going on since they know ur legally married to the their son,

they cant pretend to be unaware of his where about. get to the root of what matters is, he will come get u pregnant go back untill he disappears finally

then cry to ur God if he is truly ur husband he will come for u, if not worst shld happen and move on.

be careful of having a baby for him now until u are sure,

one of my church member had same experience, she got to uk meet another woman pregnant for her husband to be, thank God they have not gone far like u. hope both parent were present at the marriage and give their consent?

God will give u peace of mind

meeeeeeeeeeeeeen!!

strange time now.

this is serious,obodo oyibo is evil