Now let's discuss 10 ways people stylishly sleep off in the church but pretend they are not

1. They Bend Their Heads As If They Are Praying

During long prayers and by the time they become tired abnd start feeling sleepy, they will sit down, bend their heads and will start shaking it like agama lizard. This is to deceive the congregation and the ushers that they are also praying..

2. They Wear Goggles

Na dis one common pass among youths. When they want to sleep, they will wear their goggles (usual black shades) and focus on the preacher as if they are so much interested in the sermon. This is just to deceive the man of God himself as well as the ushers that they are feeling the sermon. The only way you will know that they are sleeping is when the preacher asks them to prophesy into the life of the person sitting next to them.

3. They Focus On The Bible

To avoid the usher disturbing them from sleeping, they will open their Bible to a random chapter and focus on it as if they want to check a Bible verse. They sleep under the pretence of reading the Holy Bible just to avoid distraction

4. They keep Nodding their Heads

Some of them are very smart that they keep shaking their heads like agama lizard to every word the man of God is saying. It's not like they are listening but to deceive the ushers. They will quickly take a nap and quickly return to a conscious state before the ushers come around

5. They Lie On The Floor

Some people will go as far as lying on the floor appreciating God for he has done and before you know it, from dia dem go divert go sleep

6. They Fold Their Arms

Some will fold their arms in disguise, then rest their back on their chairs and off they sleep

7. They Go On Their Knees

Some of them will go on their knees, rest their heads on the chair and will sleep off. Funny enough. I used to be guilty of this act

8. They Abuse the Ushers

Even though it is obvious they are sleeping, they will still pretend they are not. If any usher taps them on the shoulder they will heap curses on him

9. They Hide At The Back Rows

These ones go sit down for back seat in case sleep
show face cos dem no want make anybody disturb them.

10. Feel free to add the last one


Happy Sunday fellas


Thanks for reading

Have fun

Originally written by: Tosyne2much

Source:
http://tosyne2much..co.uk/2015/09/10-ways-people-stylishly-sleep-during.html?m=1

Nursing mothers will lay with their kids at the back of the church...


Kids will be awake eating Cabin biscuit and mothers will be snoring deeply....

#JESUSISCOMINGSOON

Lol




I can identify with these.

Times when a loud Halleluya wakes you up from slumber, then u begin to shake your head up and down with a loud hmmm.... Like say the Spirit hoLD you.... Odikwa Selious.





In other news, these Port Harcourt Pastors no take am easy o.....

Lol

odikwa too truth

Lols

Lolz.. den wen i was in the world with wristbangle.
We did Almost all..

Thank God am not a xtian

Lol

It takes a "Chief Sleeper" to draft this out

When preaching sometimes gets bored .. its just natural .. even in Class.

Lol...The best is to kneel then put your head on the chair with your church note as pillow, while u have ur two hands raised so people think you are in the spirit.

Sleeping in mosque will be easier, u just put ur head on the mat and remain there. No offence intended o....

tohpahz:
Lolz.. den wen i was in the world with wristbangle.
We did Almost all..

what were you there

Grrrrrrrhhhh

I am guilty

tosyne2much
SMH for those novice tactics of sleeping in d church

I think I'm an expert @ sleeping even while sitting right before pastor.

Have you seen someone sleeping with both eyes wide opened before? oh strange?

At all it's not strange, I have a friend that naturally does it so I learnt it for situations like that

The only way u can know is when my eyes are getting red

I'm perfect to d extent that I'll maintain the position of my head after I've perfected it to be like angle 85.degree with my shoulder either right side or left side

If my head mistakenly comes down to like angle 80degree, I'll gain consciousness and blink

Then, I'm back awake.



I rarely sleep sha, but when I do, ushers are fools

tohpahz:
Lolz.. den wen i was in the world with wristbangle.
We did Almost all..

So u call yourself born again and yet u were sleeping in church.

Wifey God understands our hustle during the week.

RoyalRoy:
Lol




I can identify with these.

Times when a loud Halleluya wakes you up from slumber, then u begin to shake your head up and down with a loud hmmm.... Like say the Spirit hoLD you.... Odikwa Selious.





In other news, these Port Harcourt Pastors no take am easy o.....

That picture of urs is too hilarious.

they just sleep

Hawlahscho:
tosyne2much
SMH for those novice tactics of sleeping in d church

I think I'm an expert @ sleeping even while sitting right before pastor.

Have you seen someone sleeping with both eyes wide opened before? oh strange?

At all it's not strange, I have a friend that naturally do it so I learnt it for situations like that

The only way u can know is when my eyes are getting red

I'm perfect to d extent that I'll maintain the position of my head after I've perfected it to be like angle 85.degree with my shoulder either right side or left side

If my head mistakenly comes down to like angle 80degree, I'll gain consciousness and blink

Then, I'm back awake.



I rarely sleep sha, but when I do, ushers are fools

Hahaha roflwkmd


Baba, you be veteran sleeper oooo

10.they don't sleep no matter how they feel sleepy. sometimes,they stand up from their seat and walk out of the auditorium,then,walks in after some minutes...

When Nature calls, even pastor's wife go sleep when her husband dey preach

RoyalRoy:
Lol




I can identify with these.

Times when a loud Halleluya wakes you up from slumber, then u begin to shake your head up and down with a loud hmmm.... Like say the Spirit hoLD you.... Odikwa Selious.





In other news, these Port Harcourt Pastors no take am easy o.....

lwkmd. ....... I don die

People sleep only when the sermon is boring, but i dont think anybody can sleep in apostle suleiman church cus the preaching is fire fire

ritababe:
People sleep only when the sermon is boring, but i dont think anybody can sleep in apostle suleiman church cus the preaching is fire fire

You are right..

Also when the pastor is owing you. You can vex sleep.

Hawlahscho:
tosyne2much
SMH for those novice tactics of sleeping in d church

I think I'm an expert @ sleeping even while sitting right before pastor.

Have you seen someone sleeping with both eyes wide opened before? oh strange?

At all it's not strange, I have a friend that naturally do it so I learnt it for situations like that

The only way u can know is when my eyes are getting red

I'm perfect to d extent that I'll maintain the position of my head after I've perfected it to be like angle 85.degree with my shoulder either right side or left side

If my head mistakenly comes down to like angle 80degree, I'll gain consciousness and blink

Then, I'm back awake.



I rarely sleep sha, but when I do, ushers are fools

You need deliverance..

Quilty of all.....but to God be the glory..







I am born again!wow!!

400billionman:

You need deliverance..

That's your opinion.























It's none of my business.

Lalasticlala

Lalasticlala dis thread dey waste ooo

Lwkmd!!! Rememba dose days wen i was still a learner i will nw drop my biro during class (esp maths class) nd bend down to pik it, i will nw sleep, if dey nw call my name, i will say am lookin for my pen buh my teacher catches cause my eyeballs will be red, wen am nuh smokin weed under d chair, y shuld my eyeballs be red? Bt nw i don learn new skills