9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! - Romance - Nairaland
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| 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by Nobody: 10:24am On Oct 18, 2015 |
[b]As I’ve interacted with thousands of married couples in person and online, I’ve noticed some bad habits many husbands are doing to sabotage their marriages. There are obviously many unhealthy behaviors many wives are doing too, but I’m going to focus this particular post on some of the most common and destructive habits of married men. This is NOT intended to bash my bros out there. I struggle with things on this list too. This is intended to be a call to action for all of us to step and make some radical readjustments for the sake of our marriages and families. This is not a comprehensive list, but these are some of the most common bad habits of many married men. If these are a factor in your marriage, please take immediate action to correct these issues. If you’re a wife reading this, I’d also encourage you to read my popular post on 9 things your husband is always thinking about to better understand the male thought process and to improve communication in your marriage. In no particular order… 1. Getting more excited about Fantasy Football than you get about your wife and kids: As I’m writing this, it’s football season and I’m a fan, but I’m blown away at the amount of time, effort, energy, money and enthusiasm so many guys invest into Fantasy Football. Guys, “Fantasy” in the name, so it’s not even real. It’s okay to be fans, but let’s not live vicariously through pro athletes all football season long at the expense of our loved ones. Let’s be more excited about our real lives than our Fantasy stats. 2. Looking at porn: This one is going to step on a lot of toes, because millions of people (a majority of them men) look at porn regularly and see nothing at all wrong with it. I address this in much more detail in my popular post on the Truth about Porn , but in a nutshell, porn desensitizes us from real intimacy. It’s a form of virtual infidelity, and it’s a “gateway drug” towards other marriage- destroying behaviors. Marriage requires monogamy, and monogamy should be mental as well as physical. Instead of living in the fantasy world of porn, work to build stronger sexual intimacy in your own marriage. 3. Zoning out when your wife is talking to you: Men and women process communication in different ways, but both spouses need to make conscious efforts to connect with the other. Men, we can have a tendency to “zone out” during conversations, but our wives need and deserve our full, undivided attention. Let’s not approach conversations like zombies on autopilot. Let’s be fully present. Remember, your wife’s need for meaningful communication is every bit as strong as your need for sex. That should put it into perspective. 4. Getting mad at your kids for stuff you do too: I catch myself in this one all the time. We can easily get into the “Do as I say” instead of “Do as I do” mentality, but our kids need our example much more than our instruction. We can’t tell them not to cuss when we’re cussing in front of them. We can’t tell them to control their temper when we venting our anger all the time. We’ve got to practice what we preach if we’re going to have any longterm credibility. 5. Checking out other women: This one has a lot of similarities with #2 (looking at porn), but it creates some separate issues as well. When we check out other women in public, we’re publicly disrespecting our wives and publicly objectifying other women all at once. Watch where your eyes go. Don’t swing your head around at every woman wearing yoga pants. Have more respect for your wife. 6. Not wearing a wedding ring: This one is controversial, but I’m a big believer in wearing a wedding ring. I talk about this in more detail in my post on 3 Reasons to Wear Your Wedding Ring . Whether or not your wear a ring is one of the first things women will notice about you and they will make assumptions about your “availability” and even your commitment to your marriage based on the presence or absence of a ring. Wear it as often as you can. 7. Giving your career and hobbies your best and giving your wife your leftovers: We’ve all been guilty (at times) of giving our best efforts to other people and pursuits and then giving our leftovers to the ones who should matter most. Let’s make every effort to give our very best energies to our families. 8. Staring at your phone more than you make eye contact with your family: I don’t want my kids’ primary memories of me to be the top of my head while I stared at my phone or laptop. This is a struggle for many men (including me), because we feel the pressure to be constantly connected to the world, and sometimes, it even feels like a necessity in working to provide for our families. Still, we need to create clear boundaries to have the electronics shut off as often as possible so we can be fully present and engaged at home. 9. Expecting your wife to do everything around the house: Stats show that even in homes where both the husband and wife work full-time outside the home, the wife is still doing the vast majority of domestic duties around the house. Guys, we need to step up here (I’m talking to myself too). Your wife is not your maid. Give her the respect and support she deserves by helping around the house (and in all other areas too). Men, whether or not these particular issues apply to you, let’s resolve together to be the husbands and fathers our families deserve. Let’s love, protect, provide and serve them to the best of our abilities. Let’s make sure our actions and our words communicate our undying love and commitments. They need and deserve our very best!!! I Hope This Helps  [/b]1 Like |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by whirlwind7(m): 10:33am On Oct 18, 2015 |
These are pertinent issues, and almost every male is guilty of a lot of them. The one I would gladly understand and pardon any man for, is point #3.  I hope to work more on my short attention span whenever my woman starts yakking over everything and nothing in particular. Once minor issues don't interest me, I totally zone out. Many women have mastered the art of trying to get your attention when they know you are absolutely, totally engrossed in a particular thing you are fond of. It makes them feel like they could be losing out on their man's scale of priorities, and that's when they try to exert themselves. It's understandable, but at the same time, it's unnecessary. Males and females are wired in a totally different way, such that their lines of thought could be absolutely diametrical. 1 Like |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by IamLEGEND1: 10:44am On Oct 18, 2015 |
I'll be sure to come back and read when I get married in 40yrs time. 1 Like |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by missyadorable(f): 10:54am On Oct 18, 2015 |
@op..you tried. especially for not including "stop commiting adultery" because that can NEVER stop.. |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by ednut1(m): 10:57am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Mind your F**king business  . as if u can be a perfect husband ur self  |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by Nobody: 10:59am On Oct 18, 2015 |
missyadorable:Your Pessimism Though!!! It can stop ...... & It begins with You!!! |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by Nobody: 11:02am On Oct 18, 2015 |
ednut1:I Am not yet perfect, But I always try!!!  |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by flawlesRebirth(f): 11:06am On Oct 18, 2015 |
wish they would listen |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by ElDeeVee(m): 11:33am On Oct 18, 2015 |
missyadorable:Don't be so sure |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by WebSurfer(m): 11:51am On Oct 18, 2015 |
missyadorable:lmao |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by Adesiji77: 1:58pm On Oct 18, 2015 |
Following... |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by CharlyNick: 2:40pm On Oct 18, 2015 |
Quite Educative........ And informative |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by missyadorable(f): 6:17pm On Oct 18, 2015 |
ElDeeVee:100% sure |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by missyadorable(f): 6:18pm On Oct 18, 2015 |
rexkexmilan: Am not pessimistic,am realistic |
| Re: 9 Things MARRIED MEN Need To Stop Doing!!! by ElDeeVee(m): 7:03am On Oct 20, 2015 |
missyadorable:Wrong Hypothesis |
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