Were you circumcised? If yes, see your doctor, it could be abnormal scarring that made the stuff less elastic.

It could also be vaginismus, a kind of spasms of your vaginal muscles, due to fear of penetration. You will need counselling and time.

Or it could simply be as a result of it being your first times, plus inadequate lubrication. Use lubricant. KY jelly is good.

Or it could be any combination of the above.

[quote author=chichi234 post=39355356][/quote]
To disvirgin a lady especially when the man is inexperienced and the lady afraid of the unknown could be one of the most difficult tasks in any sexual activity. Focus more on fore plays till you are drenched wet, then allow him penetrate without anxiety. Doing it gently has always been the key. You will discover you won't find it fun in your first three meetings because the Hymen isn't turn yet. It's a matter of time, consistency and making it pleasurable. It's not gonna be easy but you will achieve that feat.

Make una rob ororo

Thatss y i hate all this virgin talk, i want to know my problem before
I commit myself in marriage, even if i cant solve it, but let me be aware instead
Of making someones life miserable.

Noble4life:
Obviously, You're The Slowpoke! Well, Guess You Guys Are Still Rehearsing. When Una Ready, Una Go Act Well.

Sorry

Test drive ur man befor getn married! ...


U neva knw, u may marry a man with a small penis or a huge one if u say no to sex befor marriage. Its ur call..

The issue u complained about is the advantage of marrying as a virgin.

I don't know why women were told that keep ur self for ur future husband cuz the 1st sex dat night is d best

As a matter of fact, its d worst sex u wud eva have, the pain and all but as time goes by, u wud expand and talk all of him.

But be careful wat u wish for cuz once some women have slack vaginal muscle walls after repeated intercourse, the man gets dat "floating" feel inside her

NB am not advocating for virgins to lose their virginity but am jus saying it jus d way it is

Use KY jelly. The two of you should rub the gel. You may have to use it repeatedly until you overcome the tightiness. I wz in your shoes 8yrs ago, always scared of sex because of anticipated pains. I wasn't pregnant until 4months later after a doctor recommended the lubricant for me.

Hello OP,

I understand what you are going through, I've never been with a virgin, but i know it could be very distressing to find yourselves unable to enjoy sex. And i know it is a very difficult thing to discuss since you both are virgins and you most probably achieved that by avoiding anything sex talk or otherwise.

But here i can give you an advice based on what a close friend who married a virgin experienced. First night they couldn't find a hole at all they fooled around and had to make do with romancing and smooching but no real action. Second day they have to download anatomy pictures and use torchlight to locate the place. after a lot of pre-intimacy, the dude managed to insert a finger which was less painful for the lady but after a while he was able to enter,he couldn't enjoy it because the thing was too painful for her at first. So in day three he actually enjoyed it and she also did. So technically it took three days to dis-virgin the woman.

I takes time, but you must get help on the internet or talk to an experienced elder person or a doctor.

I hope he is even trying to get into the right hole. Good Luck!!

EfemenaXY:
What a tale.

@OP: Have you both tried lubrication? I don't get how you can have 0rgasm$ without full penetration? Are you sure what you felt were indeed 0rgasm$??

Orgasm@ is possible without penetration. Forpla¥ does wonders when done properly.

Squad4:
Hello OP,

I understand what you are going through, I've never been with a virgin, but i know it could be very distressing to find yourselves unable to enjoy sex. And i know it is a very difficult thing to discuss since you both are virgins and you most probably achieved that by avoiding anything sex talk or otherwise.

But here i can give you an advice based on what a close friend who married a virgin experienced. First night they couldn't find a hole at all they fooled around and had to make do with romancing and smooching but no real action. Second day they have to download anatomy pictures and use torchlight to locate the place. after a lot of pre-intimacy, the dude managed to insert a finger which was less painful for the lady but after a while he was able to enter,he couldn't enjoy it because the thing was too painful for her at first. So in day three he actually enjoyed it and she also did. So technically it took three days to dis-virgin the woman.

I takes time, but you must get help on the internet or talk to an experienced elder person or a doctor.

I hope he is even trying to get into the right hole. Good Luck!!

Luckygurl:

Why you dey sad?

spacyzuma:


Why you dey sad?

Travails of a woman

Luckygurl:


Travails of a woman

Ndo. Learn from the experiences of others.

How come it's always those that married as virgins that always have such problems? I've never seen/heard single but dating virgins have issues with popping the cherry ?

It's . I was not a Virgin when I got married but I can't remember having any issues besides a little sweet pain on my first time.

@ OP, sorry o. Engage in more of pre-intimacy and maybe some lubrication . Hope he's putting it into the right hole?

ifyalways:
How come it's always those that married as virgins that always have such problems? I've never seen/heard single but dating virgins have issues with popping the cherry?

It's . I was not a Virgin when I got married but I can't remember having any issues besides a little sweet pain on my first time.

@ OP, sorry o. Engage in more of pre-intimacy and maybe some lubrication . Hope he's putting it into the right hole?

because nigerian women often marry in their mid-20s to their early 30s. by then, the hymën would have developed a thicker membrane that can be quite difficult to pop. the older a woman get before she pops the cherry, the more stubborn the skin around it would become.

spacyzuma:


Ndo. Learn from the experiences of others.

coogar:


because nigerian women often marry in their mid-20s to their early 30s. by then, the hymën would have developed a thicker membrane that can be quite difficult to pop. the older a woman get before she pops the cherry, the more stubborn the skin around it would become.

Hmmn, Doctor Coogar .

I'm qualified, what's the next step?

op,speaking from my experience, it's normal, don't because of pain stay away from your hubby,the opening will get wider with time,engage in it more frequently and in a couple of weeks u won't rem anything called pain .nothing to worry about.

philfrey08:

Doctor... wetin u wan tell doctor?

Of course, They are Understanding and have the best answers

EfemenaXY:
What a tale.

@OP: Have you both tried lubrication? I don't get how you can have 0rgasm$ without full penetration? Are you sure what you felt were indeed 0rgasm$??

Yes Sir, orgasms can be clitoral or vaginal

Squad4:


Hello OP,
I can give you an advice based on what a close friend who married a virgin experienced. First night they couldn't find a hole at all [/b]they fooled around and had to make do with romancing and smooching but no real action. [b]Second day they have to download anatomy pictures and use torchlight to locate the place. after a lot of pre-intimacy, the dude managed to insert a finger which was less painful for the lady but after a while he was able to enter,he couldn't enjoy it because the thing was too painful for her at first. So in day three he actually enjoyed it and she also did. So technically it took three days to dis-virgin the woman.
I takes time, but you must get help on the internet or talk to an experienced elder person or a doctor.
I hope he is even trying to get into the right hole. Good Luck!!

On a more serious note, the issue of using the right hole is a serious matter, if I narrate what I have seen in practice, I won't stop writing. Education on the matter of 'bumping uglies' is a serious issue in our society. The OP should consult a elderly married friend to ensure that she is doing thing right OR have a consultation with a doctor

Squad4:
Hello OP,

I understand what you are going through, I've never been with a virgin, but i know it could be very distressing to find yourselves unable to enjoy sex. And i know it is a very difficult thing to discuss since you both are virgins and you most probably achieved that by avoiding anything sex talk or otherwise.

But here i can give you an advice based on what a close friend who married a virgin experienced. First night they couldn't find a hole at all they fooled around and had to make do with romancing and smooching but no real action. Second day they have to download anatomy pictures and use torchlight to locate the place. after a lot of pre-intimacy, the dude managed to insert a finger which was less painful for the lady but after a while he was able to enter,he couldn't enjoy it because the thing was too painful for her at first. So in day three he actually enjoyed it and she also did. So technically it took three days to dis-virgin the woman.

I takes time, but you must get help on the internet or talk to an experienced elder person or a doctor.

I hope he is even trying to get into the right hole. Good Luck!!

All these na wetin person go through becos of sex? abeg cross Ur mind, tear dat thing for once. after dat day, u beg for it onwards. E get who nor be virgin before? why are they making it look so complicated?

ifyalways:
How come it's always those that married as virgins that always have such problems? I've never seen/heard single but dating virgins have issues with popping the cherry ?

It's . I was not a Virgin when I got married but I can't remember having any issues besides a little sweet pain on my first time.

@ OP, sorry o. Engage in more of pre-intimacy and maybe some lubrication . Hope he's putting it into the right hole?

Ur right in my thought. They make this thing look so difficult. We were all virgins before ooo

How did they use torchlight to locate the place?

Did nepa take light at the time?

or fear of "oju" (eyes) na the beginning of wisdom?

I know how it feels because it happened to me... First night, no penetration.. . Several weeks, try and error... I even called a urologist to go see him for checks... But at about 2 and half months after... I don turn chairman for the thing... me and my wife were virgins too before we married some 7 months ago...

The greatest tool for sex is the mind... Two of u shd not be anxious...

[quote author=chichi234 post=39355356][/quote]

There's nothing wrong wif u dear, it's because ur hubby is equally a learner. He should seek the skills of popping a cherry.

...and sum1 will come and start claiming virginity until marriage is dis and dat. Imagine after 2 months ur still struggling to have sex....wasted honeymoon. Abeg, no dulling on my wedding night.

I must say being a virgin does not make you run away from all information about sex until you are married. except you want to be a reverend Sister.

Assuming you were reading extensively knowing fully well you will be married someday, you would have known that there are lubs that helps when the entrance or the V area was not moist enough for entrance. You should have known this all this while and be prepared for it like you were preparing for an upcoming interview or uni examination.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with both of you. your husband can go really deep if he wants to; but by him looking at you lying on that bed with your face twisted like amala that was stirred with violence was scaring the living day light out of him. Since he was a novice like me he chickened out, doesn't wanna hurt his jewel of inestimable value. when next you wanna try, remember communication is the key. also keep this in mind;

I. you cannot run away from sex no matter how hard you try because it is a precious gift you give to someone you love. no more excuse.

2. Try exercising before you try or better still dance. it makes the body flexible and cool.

3. Try to tell him to have a pre-intimacy like 12mins with you ( God how do i explain pre-intimacy? hmmm!!! ok use Dictionary)that will make you ready
and a bit wet and will make him go in and no much pain.

4 there are Vaseline in every shop. use it to rob your man's instrument for easy access.

5. try the most comfortable position you fill that is good for you.

6. sex is painful at the beginning but it gets better and better as you get to know what it was.

7 Good luck and congratulation on the wedding. We nairaland family were not invited and u came in with riddles for us to solve abi? ok since that was your first offence we have forgiven you

Jimdonnet:
Am sure its ur anus ur talking about*virgins don't exist again

Can't stop laughing!

Dammit, you are a very bad boy