davidt:

I do not see anything wrong with it. I'm curious though. Why do you want to build a house? If you are looking for things to spend money on, why don't you invest your money most likely in shares.

The benefits of owning your home certainly outweighs the economic advantage of investing in shares. But I am curious as to why the woman would want to build her own home though?

@Poster

Reading between the lines, you have a control freak as a husband and you are having insecurities about your future together, which is quite understandable since he is also a wife beater. The issue is not really about whether it is ok or not for a wife to build her own house, there is a fundamental problem in your marriage and I advise you to seek counselling ASAP. A marriage is a coexistence and cohabitting of equals who love and respect one another. You should have equal vote in decisions, it appears not to be the case in your situation, your relationship comes across as a MASTER\SLAVE model, i.e he makes decisions and you just have to follow. I would be delighted , infact, over the moon if my wife came up saying she'd want to build a house rather than the typical purchase of jewelry, clothes, shoes et al. I am rather the one pushing her for it, my success is a reflection of my wife's success, whatever makes her happy. Its time men stop being control freaks, it is old and outdated, marriage more commonly is now about supporting each other and pushing each other to be the best we can be.

Nothing you will hear here will fix your marital issue, get to work with a counselor or i'm afraid for your relationship.

no matter how you chose to invest your money, get the full support of ur husband to avoid mistrust

LadyT:

This guy beats her like an animal didn't he break your arm or was it your fucking collarbone?

Omo better start building fast fast.  But you need to travel to Naija frequently to check the progress that Monster wont allow you to travel I'm sure.

Amebo ni e ,sho mo sha?

@poster
Ur husband is not a man. . . .sorry to say

@post
Nothing wrong
Build it with or without his consent abeg

If you do not tell your husband how he should spend his salary he has no freaking right to tell you what to do with yours. Bottom line is that if you or even your husband decides to do anything as significant as building a house then you should be in agreement. These kind of men are the ones that drive women to do things behind their backs. As for those of you saying she should not, does this man seem reasonable to you. I can tell you right now that this sort of person will not have a problem kicking her out if acts like she has an opinion. What will she have then. Common sense should tell you that a woman that has a man that is this inconsiderate and egotistical should have her own thing on the side

congoshine:
. What? He beats you//? Please start your foundation  urgently or at least invest in shares

Wait a minute!!! What did I hear you say?  SHARES??


Pleeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaassssssssse!!! Who in their right mind think of shares these days when the world ecomony is crippled.lol!!!!!  Please, I suggest she opt for the first advice much better and more reasonable as shares no longer raise the roof. Naaaaaaaaaa - Bad idea!

HE BROKE HER BONES? ? ? ? Are you serious? I knew it. As soon as she was saying that he wants to tell her what to do with her money I knew he was another spineless, abusive son of a bitch. I really don't know why she is still there

TOPE2000!:

@poster
Ur husband is not a man. . . .sorry to say

@post
Nothing wrong
Build it with or without his consent abeg

how would you feel if your husband built a property without your knowledge or consent?

@ poster, why do you call it "your own house?" if you build it while you are, it is still a community property (is for you and your husband's) I am not sure why people are looking at it as if you will solely be the owner.

Yes it is proper for woman to build her own house, no need to explain why, it is simply proper

And why not? Building a good house/home is a good thing.

Theblessed:



Wait a minute!!! What did I hear you say?  SHARES??


Pleeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaassssssssse!!! Who in their right mind think of shares these days when the world ecomony is crippled.lol!!!!!  Please, I suggest she opt for the first advice much better and more reasonable as shares no longer raise the roof. Naaaaaaaaaa - Bad idea!

YEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS,this is the best time to BUY shares  .

The secret is to buy LOW &  sell HIGH. She's it in it for the Long haul & its much more liquid & discrete than a building .

There is nothing wrong ,with a woman building her own house.The husband is feeling insecure.If he is feeling insecure why did he marry the woman in the first place?

Well ,I guess different strokes for differenk folks.(All marriage are unique and different)

u need to wake up woman, wat do u think this is 1745

oh lord

Lizzy!!!
Comit the heart of ur husband into God's hands and that he will see reasons with u while u need to build ur own house. Tell him it can be another source of income 4 the family by putting it on rentage,
Just pray cos 'THE HEART OF THE KING IS IN GOD'S HAND AS THE RIVERS OF WATER, HE TURNETH IT TO WHEREVER HE WILLETH (PROVERBS 21 vs 1)

@ bsan,i will add u to my yahoo messanger so we can talk better.Thanks

whats the problem in a woman building her own house ?
the more the house the more inheritance for the children.

davidt:

I do not see anything wrong with it. I'm curious though. Why do you want to build a house? If you are looking for things to spend money on, why don't you invest your money most likely in shares.

No please, Those of us that invested our money in shares are regretting it. Shares is depreciating every day.

building a house is simply investing in real estate.
You could be securing your future, i mean your old age with such asset.
You have to be smart about it, you know you are dealing with a wife beater.
make him understand that you are doing if for investment purpose.
i pray god help you.

@post

I don't think it is proper for you to build your own house outside the knowledge of your husband. If there is unity in a family, this issue should not arise because it undermine the authority of the husband as the head (especially when this is done behind his knowledge) and it has the tendency of destroying the matrimony.
My advise is (if you want to invest for the future of your children) open children endowment fund accounts in their names and any property investment you want to make do it jointly (with submissiveness) with your husband in the name of your family. Wishing you all the very best.

@poster, i will advise that you try let your husband see reasons that is for both of you, whatever is for you is for him, so i dont see anything wrong in it, because when i get married i have a plan to build my own house not minding if the man am marrying is very rich or have houses, it does not matter, and also being that he is a bully, a wife beater, my sister my quick advise is that you build that house bacuse he might beat you oneday and send you out. he knows that there is nothing wrong in you building a house, been the type of person he is, he is feeling insecured, if not, he wont be thinking to that direction.

A word is enough for the wise

@[color=#770077]Poster You said your husband has a house. Did he build/acquire the property after your marriage? Is your husband house in your names?

With what you have share about your marriage; please go ahead and start building your home and start saving for the rainy days too. If this husband of your continue as a wife-beater/bully your marriage is surely going to head for the rocks so it is better for you to have a back-up investment that you can fall back on.

[b]Meanwhile seek professional help first with the money you want to use to build a house and save your marriage before contemplating on building houses! [/[/b]color]

So please tell me for those who are against it, what happens to this woman when her husband dies and everything is in his name and he has some greedy selfish wicked relatives that claim all of it from her.

Do what you need to do to look after yourself and and ur kids cos if he beats you to the point u are close to death will u stay in the house cos u have no where else to go.

Abeg at least me i know if my husband tries that s*** he will not even see my behind

this is nigerian marriage for you.  man has his own and woman her own. both live happily thereafter. wonderful life

I dont see any sense in a woman building her house! What for? Why does she need it? Isnt she built to be under a man's roof instead of playing madam big woman for no reason? They are rather better off staying in a rented apartment where they can manage within their financial capability than owning a home.

Besides if they are to stay in a house, its better the man gives them the role of collecting rent of his property than a woman owning one. If she gets out of her way to tell her husband she needs it, the man better divorce her because she has some hidden agenda somewhere!

Men are to own properties and homes, women are to stay in those homes and to make it clean and habitable!

Chuck Ba$$:

I dont see any sense in a woman building her house! What for? Why does she need it? Isnt she built to be under a man's roof instead of playing madam big woman for no reason? They are rather better off staying in a rented apartment where they can manage within their financial capability than owning a home.

Besides if they are to stay in a house, its better the man gives them the role of collecting rent of his property than a woman owning one. If she gets out of her way to tell her husband she needs it, the man better divorce her because she has some hidden agenda somewhere! 

Men are to own properties and homes, women are to stay in those homes and to make it clean and habitable!

part of growing up is understanding no one owe you agreeing with your point of view

spikedcylinder:

This used to happen all the time with my mum. In the early years, whenever my dad found out my mum's got a new house, he'll throw a hissy fit, threaten fire and brimstone, involve family members, practically tear the roof down.
These days, when she tells him "I've got new property somewhere", he just nods and continues reading his paper.
I guess he got comfortable when he realised that it was all purely commercial for her and she does have a passion for properties as opposed to cars and other stuff.


@ poster

I'd say you should build your house but make your husband understand that its just another possession, get him involved in the building process and peace will reign. Unless of course he's a psycho.

interesting

As far i am concern, there is nothing bad in it but we need to be considerate atimes coz women could be dangerous, if you can let your husband see reasons why you want to build the house, no problem but dont do anything without his consent as this could lead to lack of trust, all the best.

If the woman is building the house secretly, then she may be planning to move out of a bad marriage.

However, if she's building the house with the full knowledge and approval of her husband, then I dont see why there'd be a problem.

spikedcylinder:

it was all purely commercial for her and she does have a passion for properties as opposed to cars and other stuff.

@ bolded

that's all.

I'd chose multiple houses over multiple cars anyday.