Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. - Family (4) - Nairaland
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| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by Benoxvals(m): 3:06am On Dec 11, 2015 |
Deeper life members are funny sometimes,their way of serving God is beyond my comprehension...they practice Christianity in a military kind of way and some of their rules are way too funny.Some of the rules which includes-- A member MUST marry a member(they are so serious about this one). No celebration of birthdays but they sponsor it. No celebration of Xmas. The day a friend invited me to their church,I was told that I will not be sitting with my friend at the main church because he is a full member but am not..I was like WTF!! and a bunch of funny reasons where given to me to back up their actions. O.P,read the Bible very well and you will see that there is no aggressiveness in the modern Christianity and there is no military kind of rule. You know your rights from wrong,good from bad and it's all about your Head,eyes and your heart(what u think,sees and what you decide to do). At this point,all you need is ENDURANCE until you are independent enough to make your own decisions and back them up(it will get easier with time). 2 Likes |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by princeonx: 3:21am On Dec 11, 2015 |
jjwaterfalls:If God na human una go Don finish the man with stress!! Must everything be about prayer and fasting? Nepa take light, some advise you to pray! Fuel shortage, pray!, I guess people should also pray when they're out of phone credit!!  1 Like |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by whiteroses(f): 4:18am On Dec 11, 2015 |
Well , i like their ways and i am an undercover Deeper Lifer but by choice. One thing about them is that they are true children of God and they usually flourish. The doctrine basically forces you to please God. Bible says when a mans way pleases the lord ?.... I have lived life ive done it all but now i derive pleasure in serving God because he paved way for me. Your parents might not love you in a worldly manner cos they sound like fanatics but they are your angels. Your mates will have things they hate about theirs too like alcolic father, notorious bleaching mother, adulterous father, cocaine pushers, strong generational cursed family, abiku house etc is that what you want ? Won gba iku lowo omo adiye oni ori akitan lohun ti fe jehun! 1 Like |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by MistadeRegal(m): 4:36am On Dec 11, 2015 |
Your parents ain't the wicked they seem to you. They know what they are doing. If you comply, you will get the gain. Do not see them as making you depressed, if you had my kind of experience, you will be happy about having someone like them. And perhaps, you may come to understand soon. |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by pikapizy(m): 4:50am On Dec 11, 2015 |
minasota: No you are the one under satanic attacks ...most deeper life children the op is looking up to are wolves they come home and pretend and their hypocritic parents cover up for them and potray them as the best.. How do I know this ? I was born in deeper life ... |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by Emeka71(m): 4:53am On Dec 11, 2015 |
nairalander2015:And you gad to open a new forum profile just because of that, by the way what is a deeperlifer looking for on this Forum? |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by Drumigba(m): 5:00am On Dec 11, 2015 |
My friend, never ever think of suicide as an option because that is the worst mistake you will be making. A future lies in your hand atleast you are in the university. Just concentrate and make the best out of it and whem you are on your own you can change denomination. Have a word woth a psycologist and moreso the pastor of your parents. It is well. |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by latitidejavu: 5:05am On Dec 11, 2015 |
@OP, I can confidently call myself a young adult and I grew under the same parents that you just described except that their own issue was another version of extremism known as scripture union. Those condemning the OP know nothing about how painful it can be when you are such a good boy especially as a teen and yet you are being condemned just because you do not fit into their spiritual ideology. In my case, I was not depressed. I became angry and rebelled. I did not become bad, criminal or any such thing, I simply sought out other answers and I found them. I pursued personal development, business and common sense religion. And this is what i will advise the OP to do, rebel NOW! Reject that deeper life ideology and all its form, it will limit your potential or at worse destroy it. And the sad thing about that ideology is that you will be blinded by the spirituality to understand that you have been limited. Do whatever you want to do, make friends and hang out with girls, do things that will teach you the other sides of life as long as you do not become criminal or evil or get into gang and the such. for those supporting the parents, you have no idea that this is why many young people do not know how to handle basic life challenges because they have been bottled in a pigeon hole. Yes, we love our parents but African parents should learn to strike that balance and acknowledge the independence and individuality of their children. @Op, you should simply make up your mind to go AGAINST everything they say and do your own thing your way. If you do not do this now, your psyche may be seriously affected. Love them by breaking out because if you do not you may not be able to take care of them. I have observed that all of us that broke away from that ideology are doing well and all those who could not are still tied down in that retrogressive mindset. love them but rebel against their ideas. You are different from your parents. 4 Likes |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by tarano: 5:13am On Dec 11, 2015 |
My Brother in all things stay close to God. Look for a bible believing church. With time your parent can not force their religious practices on you. But stay close to God. We have all been there. |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by isnovic(m): 5:15am On Dec 11, 2015 |
You are still young. You feel your folks are out to spoil your fun....and fun i mean the worldly definition of it. I am a deeper lifer myself and believe me, much more restrictive than it is today. But you would come to love your parents when you start living on your own, maybe raise a family of your own and the principles inculcated in you takes root and not by compulsion. You will find out for yourself then what your parents had saved you from experiencing....the unnecessary burden of conforming to the world and its sadistic expectation. Godly advice beareth great and exceeding reward my son .....so say the preacher |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by ChiSun27(m): 5:18am On Dec 11, 2015 |
KanoAbiaBabe: You nailed it. 1 Like |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by 42ultimate(m): 5:20am On Dec 11, 2015 |
Write a petition to pastor W.F. Kumuyi or better still go and report them to your church pastor. It is true that they are trying to nurture you but it is too much. |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by Nobody: 5:23am On Dec 11, 2015 |
You should move with the flow till you're independent. |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by OAFMods: 5:53am On Dec 11, 2015 |
latitidejavu: Like the Americans right or why not even ask African parent not to even bring up their children in the ways of their religion since you are preaching rebellion ? Would that be what you would teach to your own kids having failed to impact the doctrine of your faith in them ? How do you strike a balance with that and a rebellious child ? |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by HaneefahRN(f): 5:54am On Dec 11, 2015 |
Ur story made me remember a friend of mine, that is from a deeper life home, she is female tho. She doesn't av the zeal for most of their practices, what she did was live her life how she wants in sch- wear trousers, use magnetic earrings, wear short skirt, go to any church she feels like, etc, and when she gets home, she will tow their line. If u ain't feeling their rules, then just pretend for a while. U just av to endure till u are able to stand on ur feet, I cld av asked u to discuss wt them, but it seems d communication line isn't really there and the mom u cld easily speak too, is even the one making things hard. Or u cld get an elder who cld help u speak to them, they might not understand tho, cos they feel they are tryin to nurture u for holiness. Pls, don't do this cos u want to live a bad boy life, but I understand ur feeling of almost being choked by rules on simple things every other person don't see as a big deal |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by HaneefahRN(f): 5:55am On Dec 11, 2015 |
Ur story made me remember a friend of mine, that is from a deeper life home, she is female tho. She doesn't av the zeal for most of their practices, what she did was live her life how she wants in sch- wear trousers, use magnetic earrings, wear short skirt, go to any church she feels like, etc, and when she gets home, she will tow their line. If u ain't feeling their rules, then just pretend for a while. U just av to endure till u are able to stand on ur feet, I cld av asked u to discuss wt them, but it seems d communication line isn't really there and the mom u cld easily speak too, is even the one making things hard. Or u cld get an elder who cld help u speak to them, they might not understand tho, cos they feel they are tryin to nurture u for holiness and spirituality. Pls, don't do this cos u want to live a bad boy life, but I understand ur feeling of almost being choked by rules on simple things every other person don't see as a big deal |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by raziboi(m): 5:55am On Dec 11, 2015 |
nairalander2015:my brother.... ur not a kid again...... try other church's ....dis a free world |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by ichommy(m): 6:04am On Dec 11, 2015 |
jjwaterfalls:
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| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by latitidejavu: 6:05am On Dec 11, 2015 |
OAFMods: Thanks for your civil question. I already have a child. An infant son. I will not teach him religion. I will teach him values. I am a christian and I understand christian values to be things like love, honesty, others before self, integrity, cleanliness, fear of God and others. I will teach him to read the bible everyday. i will guide him to these but I WILL NOT SHIELD him from making mistakes. I will place good before him and tell him there is evil too. i will tell him the dangers and consequences of evil. I will not sequester him nor seek to pigeon hole him. I will not teach him the doctrine of my church ( I am an evangelical anglican) but I will teach him the words of Jesus and leave the choice to him. Now should he decide to do otherwise, i am already writing a little book I will give him once he turns 12 so whenever he comes to his senses he will read the book. i made my mistakes, I am a much better man because of my mistakes. I would have been far behind where I am now if I did not make those mistakes. I am not a saint, I never wanted to be a saint either. And to add, a little investment in child psychology books will help us especially young parents know that what we see as rebellion maybe the traits of someone who can stand up against unjust laws in the society, someone who can be guided to be a strong leader to his peers. The problem is that religious people read ONLY the bible hence their errors. This is how I will strike the balance because from my own experience it is futility to impose your doctrine. Thanks. 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by dyn1800: 6:16am On Dec 11, 2015 |
Hey bro! First, just get it straight God never make a Mistakes creating into a deeper life family. I'll Suggest you live by your present situation and pray to God to let you out of it soonest. Don't try to be rebellious either it will only worsen the situation but rather play along. More so, need you to remember that if you had no parents you must live. So I suggest you move on positively and carved out your own way of making an headway with your life. At 20, so young but not a teen anymore. Never get depressed you can always live a fulfilling life you want...... "Suicide never an Option" |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by edogho(m): 6:19am On Dec 11, 2015 |
ruggedtimi:op, don't rush into taking any advice o. since u didn't revolt long ago, I recommend you take ruggedtimi's advice. When they wait for like a month or two without hearing from you, They'll come searching n that's d best time to shock them... |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by doveda: 6:21am On Dec 11, 2015 |
nairalander2015, you are making yourself depressed not your parents. In less than five years from now, you will be your own person. If you are lucky enough to get a job after school. Regardless, you need to endure. Time is like a bullet, it might seem long but it isn't. Close your eyes, open your mind and tell yourself that you can do this. Try as much as pitiable not to get annoyed when they start talking. Find a way to let out your frustrations |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by funmercy1(f): 6:22am On Dec 11, 2015 |
What's did wit deeper life,parents,I have friend with did same tin happening 2 her ,call ur parents sit and discus with dem tell dem,make dem c it,............take heart e no easy my friend ran away once, dey nearly made her mad with what happens recently ur G.O marrying his sec,and his son tins are changing ... |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by doveda: 6:31am On Dec 11, 2015 |
M4gunners: You are a liar Westerners are more likely to follow simple instructions than Africans Keep deceiving yourself with that BS. I hope your children do not turn out to hate you. 3 Likes |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by omakay(m): 6:32am On Dec 11, 2015 |
We Africans cannot draw the line between MORAL VALUES and RELIGION. There are parents who have wrecked the lives of their children just by towing the line of RELIGION. Funny thing is there are a lot of peeps here commenting that will become RELIGIOUSLY ABUSIVE tomorrow just like the op's parents. RELIGION makes a man know he has a supreme head over him and teaches him how to fit into the good books of that supreme being. MORAL VALUES is what makes a man a decent and successful man right here on earth. Until we can draw a line between the two, we will continue to wreck our lives with RELIGION. 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by Nobody: 6:35am On Dec 11, 2015 |
Bantimor gave u the best advice, wait and be patient untill u complete ur university then u have ur freedom.don't do something u will regret. I am a witness it happened to me. Now am 40yrs and living my life. Watch word again patience! Thanks |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by KAYNINI(m): 6:37am On Dec 11, 2015 |
Bantino: God bless you man you couldn't have said it any better #i hope the youngman heeds your advice |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by omakay(m): 6:44am On Dec 11, 2015 |
omakay: For those thinking that i have no experience in what i have said, lemme just say a few things. I have a mum just the op too. If i wanna compare sef, i will say the op's mum is a learner compared to mine. I know how she has really spoilt a lot of things for us as a family. She has realised that now too but is just keeping silent about it. Right now, millions if not billions of people are both at the Redemption Camp and at the Shiloh Programme. And yet, before the year runs out, a lot of messed up things will happen in the society. So who is deceiving who? 3 Likes |
| Re: Help Me... My Mum Is Making Me Depressed. by queebeediva(f): 6:49am On Dec 11, 2015 |
Just be paitent and wait until you graduate yours is even mild compared to a friend of my whose father is a muslim and mother christain . The lady found a christain guy who wants to marry her but the fathe hashly refuse promising the girl that if she eventually get married without her consent that it will never going to be well with her in life. Imaging a father laying course upon her daughter that he never took care of. Just be prayerful and paitent until you are done with your school then you can confront them and let them no that its not by religion or church but by your heart towards worshipping God and they don't have right over your life but God has and if they can not treat you as an adult then you might as well make it happen on your own. |
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