Feeling emotionally connected with loved ones is a deeply
fulfilling experience, but one that is all too often missing in our
important relationships. Emotional intimacy thrives when both
people, or all concerned, feel safe with each other.
The question then becomes — what creates safety? Here are six
ways to increase the emotional intimacy in your most significant
relationships.
1. Take responsibility for your own feelings and needs.
When each person takes responsibility for their own feelings and
needs, then no one fears getting blamed for the other person’s
struggles. We feel safe when we know that we are not going to be
attacked if we say something or do something that another person
doesn't like.
2. Be open to learning about yourself, both alone and with
your partner.
We feel safe when we know we have an open arena in which to
discuss any problems that might come up. If we’re afraid to bring
up a problem because the other person might get angry,
defensive, resistant, or withdrawn, emotional intimacy can’t
survive.
3. Believe in your own and each other's essential
goodness.
We trust that our partner, family members, or close friends would
never intentionally hurt us, so we know that if we feel hurt by
them, it's not deliberate. This makes it easy to ask about it and try
to understand it within ourselves and with each other.
4. Be caring, kind, and compassionate with each other
rather than judgmental.
One of the quickest ways of undermining intimacy is to be
judgmental. When we fear another's judgment, we feel tense
rather than safe, open, or connected with that person.
Consciously and consistently choosing kindness and compassion
with each other — as well as with ourselves — creates the
environment of safety that allows intimacy to flourish. We need to
be able to rely on each other’s caring in order to feel the safety
necessary for emotional intimacy. http://okoyetech..com/2015/12/craving-emotional-intimacy-in-your-life.html?m=1