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Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu - Politics - Nairaland

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Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by iliyande(m): 12:47pm On Mar 18, 2016
By Haruna Mohammed Salisu

Two things prompted this write-up: just last week, I travelled to Kano to collect my result, certifying me as a graduate of mass communication with 4.07 as my cumulative CGPA and the second best graduating student, secondly, the world happiness report released by the United Nations sustainable Development Solutions Network.

The survey ranked countries based on their abilities to provide basic necessities of life for their citizens thereby making them happy .The report published on several news outfits ranked Denmark the “ Happiest Nation, Burundi, the least happy” and Nigeria 103rd least happiest in the World. But to start with the first one, as usually the case with many students who graduated and are awaiting mobilization for National Youth Service, I started browsing the street of some major towns and cities in search of a temporary job to earn a living and avoid being dependent. Nigerian youthsNigerian youth I visited several secondary schools in Kano to see if I could be appointed a classroom teacher, of all the schools I visited, the school principal pulls out dossiers of applicants waiting to be called for an interview.

I wasn’t discourage, I visited some private radio stations where some of my friends work, one of them whispered: “ we haven’t been paid salaries for three months”. What! A friend and classmate who resides in Gombe told me of a newly established Radio station—Progress FM. He advised I visit him to see if I could be lucky this time around. I conceded. Upon entry into the reception of Progress FM in his company, I demanded contact with the General Manager which I got within a couple of minutes. I tabled my issue immediately. She replied, though in a very encouraging tone at least not to get me demoralized.

“We have over 40 staff already” wow! I thanked my friend for his support and left for Bauchi, my home state. Upon arrival, another friend of mine who studied mass communication at the Federal Polytechnic, Bauchi and have completed his NYSC but is still jobless told me to hold on a second. “ I thought you have been an Editor-in-Chief of Bayero Beacon and THE READER, your school based Newspaper and Magazine? He interrogated. Yes. I replied. And you also have more than four points as your CGPA? Yes. I answered again. Then you have a chance to work with the Daily Trust Newspaper, he said.

No. Daily Trust only employs best graduating students and I am the second. I replied in a rather low tone of hopelessness. What about other National Dailies such as Vanguard, The Guardian, Sahara Reporters, Premium Times and other online newspapers? He further queried. Probably they only employ more experienced writers and seasoned journalists, but unfortunately I’m not one.

I conceded. But you can apply for Graduate Assistant in your University or Polytechnic where they teach Mass Communication, what about that? He continued with his mind boggling questions. This time around, he mentioned what I like doing most, but I was getting angrier with his questions. Universities no longer employ graduate assistants, and even if they do, you need the support of someone very influential to bag the job, I told him.

Just hold on, after your NYSC, you can apply for Nigeria Defence Academy and join the Army, he insists. I also have interest in joining the army. And I believe I have something to offer, especially in the areas of strategic communication. I believe, with a well coordinated strategic intelligence and communication, the army will unequivocally defeat the Boko Haram insurgents, I declared. But if I could not get job in all the places I mentioned earlier just because I am not an anointed candidate and lack the support of those in position of authority, I wonder how I could have access to join the army.

These are my predicaments, and no doubt of thousands of graduates in Nigeria who are still jobless for no fault of theirs. And whose future is still cloudy. Aren’t these enough to make me sad? If you think these reasons are not enough, then hold on. As I said earlier, Denmark is ranked the first “happiest nation on earth” and Nigeria is 103rd least happiest. Do you know that only Nasarawa state is richer in terms of mineral resources than the entire Denmark? Denmark has Natural gas, Limestone, Chalk, Clay, Sand, Gravel, Salt, Wind, Water, Solar and fuel trading.

In Nasarawa state, all the above resources are available plus; Beryl (emerald) Asquamirine and Haliodor), Dolomite/Marble, Sapphire, Tourmaline, Quartz- Amethyst (Topaz, gamet), Zireon, Tantalite, Cassiterite, Columbite, Limonite, Galena, Iron-Ore, Barytes, Feldspar, Limestone, Mica, Cooking coal, Talc, Cay, Salt, Chalcopyrite. Not to talk of oil, richer agricultural land, our sea and water ways.

Isn’t this enough to make you sad? In Denmark, a lawmaker takes 38,000 US Dollars as his annual salaries while a Nigerian lawmaker takes more than four times that per month (181,974 US dollars), yet a graduate in Nigeria cannot afford three square meals. In one year, a Nigerian lawmaker takes $2,183,688 US which is equivalent to four hundred and thirty million, one hundred and eighty six thousand, five hundred and thirty-six naira (N430,186,536) and his Danish counterpart has to work for more than 57 years to earn that salaries. Not only that, a Nigerian worker who earns N18,000 minimum wage has to work for more than 190 years before he will bag what a “distinguished” senator will earn in one year. Aren’t all these enough to make you sad? Then hold on.

Do you know that a Nigerian Senator earns more than Barrack Obama of US and David Cameron of UK? A lawmaker in Sweden has to work for 12 years before he/she will earn what a senator in Nigeria will take home in 12 months. Despite all the jumbo salaries of our lawmakers, about 300,000 children die annually of, guess what? Malaria! But no child dies of malaria in Denmark. As of 2015, our infant mortality rate (number of babies dying before they reach one year per 1000 birth) was put at 57 children while only 3 children die in Denmark before they reach age one.

Isn’t this enough to make you sad? Even citizens from war torn countries like Libya, Somalia, Lebanon and Tunisia are happier than Nigerians according to the ranking. While countries like United Arab Emirates are appointing Minister of Happiness to “align and derive government policy to create social good and satisfaction”, Nigeria should appoint its first ever minister of sadness to mobilize and coordinate sad people in Nigeria and at least remind them that President Buhari is in charge, probably things may get better.

I am calling on PMB to appoint me as his first minister of sadness, but my worries for now lies on the fact that I may not pass ministerial screening especially in the event that the National “Legislooters” (Legislators) become upset with my article Haruna Mohammed Salisu writes from Bauchi. He could be reached at 08063180608 or harunababale@gmail.com

Source: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2016/03/nigerias-first-minister-sadness/



www.nairaland.com/attachments/3508039_cd0830aweaeza5_jpeg7838d3cb56c7aff35eca9dba6e59bd4a Haruna trekking from Kano to Abuja to protest ‘Taraba guber election rigging’ in April 2015. Photo credit: AS Aruwa

69 Likes 9 Shares

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by iliyande(m): 12:50pm On Mar 18, 2016
.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by iamodenigbo1(m): 1:46pm On Mar 18, 2016
a wonderful article

26 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by vivalavida(m): 1:49pm On Mar 18, 2016
I concur

You raised very salient points

The mderators should move this epic piece to the fron page

9 Likes

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by peacengine(m): 1:59pm On Mar 18, 2016
This same country was the happiest only a few years back despite not having everything, but some saddists in the opposition were not happy that people were happy, and decided to use propaganda to destroy our joy. Now people are so sad and the man with the peculiar body odor said it is a blessing to face hardship.

94 Likes 9 Shares

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by Kayoski(m): 2:11pm On Mar 18, 2016
This is one of the best article I've read on NL in a long while ...
Oga Lalasticlala this is frontpage worthy...

#modified

Nigerian youth, Nigerian youth , Nigerian youth

in 1980's : u were told u r the leaders of tomorrow
in 1990's : still leaders of tomorrow
in 2000's : still leaders of tomorrow..

pls when is expected "Tomorrow " arriving

in all this years , obasanjo has ruled u twice , buhari is ruling u the second time , don't be surprised if babaginda and abdulsalam still rules again...

Take ur future in your hands " Tomorrow is today"

71 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by blazer234: 2:18pm On Mar 18, 2016
The big question is: what is the way out?

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by Surfboard(m): 2:25pm On Mar 18, 2016
Good article, and I hope Buhari names him the Minister of sadness.

While he's at it, he can also change Lai Mohammed's ministry to the Ministry of Truth.

16 Likes

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by henrydadon(m): 2:49pm On Mar 18, 2016
u were warn not to vote buhari..

27 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by gbaskiboy: 2:50pm On Mar 18, 2016
Summary pls

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by Moneyhatesme(m): 2:50pm On Mar 18, 2016
Interesting. Even Jesus wept when he saw the Mess called the federal Republic of Nigeria.

8 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by Sealeddeal(m): 2:50pm On Mar 18, 2016
We Nigerians are cowards. The only meaningful thing this generation of Nigerians can achieve to save our future generation is to go on complete rampage and take over from this very elite and destroy every Traditional/Political institutions they have built around themselves to sustain them and their children. We can never achieve anything by voting out old evil and bringing in new one. We don't deserve this very democracy if our generation will be better.
We should bury the idea of being rich and buy the idea of building a rich generation. We can never be happy but our generation can be made happy if we can successfully destroy this very dangerous set up from the evil minded elites

68 Likes 9 Shares

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by slimpoppa(m): 2:50pm On Mar 18, 2016
what?
Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by Etizz: 2:50pm On Mar 18, 2016
OP abeg how can I differentiate between left leg socks from right leg socks?

5 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by davodyguy: 2:50pm On Mar 18, 2016
Do you know that a Nigerian Senator earns more than Barrack Obama of US and David Cameron of UK? A lawmaker in Sweden has to work for 12 years before he/she will earn what a senator in Nigeria will take home in 12 months. Despite all the jumbo salaries of our lawmakers, about 300,000 children die annually of, guess what? Malaria! But no child dies of malaria in Denmark. As of 2015, our infant mortality rate (number of babies dying before they reach one year per 1000 birth) was put at 57 children while only 3 children die in Denmark before they reach age one.

That's why our elections are always do or die affair. |So bloodied election of winner takes it all.No one is in Abuja to serve you but to serve themselves

9 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by amuokuko: 2:51pm On Mar 18, 2016
Cc: Buhari

1 Like

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by Lordtrillion(m): 2:51pm On Mar 18, 2016
cool
Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by Bugatie(m): 2:51pm On Mar 18, 2016
Great read

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by chynie: 2:52pm On Mar 18, 2016
A

amazing
Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by Originality007: 2:53pm On Mar 18, 2016
Give that Op a medal....

5 Likes

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by folks4luv(f): 2:53pm On Mar 18, 2016
that is just the life of an average Nigerian. u struggle to gain admission into uni cause ur legs aren't long enough, u struggle through sch, finish service n it dawn on u that ur legs still aren't good enough to get u a desired job despite ur good result. rich becoming richer at d expense of d poor. I know one day, we will get it right.

7 Likes

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by kolnel: 2:53pm On Mar 18, 2016
Ok
Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by davodyguy: 2:54pm On Mar 18, 2016
chynie:
A
Lordtrillion:
cool
amuokuko:
jj
mruwaifo1:
ok
chynie:
A
Etizz:
OP abeg how can I differentiate between left leg socks from right leg socks?
gbaskiboy:
Summary pls
All these kids that didn't take time to read what the OP has written are really pathetic. Just to appear on the first page frivolusly, thereby shifting reasonable comments to second page and beyond.

Something should be done about this BS

25 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by lekkie073(m): 2:54pm On Mar 18, 2016
*open thread*
*read*
*yawn*
*sleep off*
*wakes up*
*stretches limbs*












what is dis one saying sef
Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by daniska3yaro(m): 2:54pm On Mar 18, 2016
Nice written

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by rapistbuhari: 2:55pm On Mar 18, 2016
Buhari does not know the meaning of blessing.

When a country is blessed they have jobs, power, fuel and above all a president.

How can we be blessed when we have nothing. When you are blessed you can feel it and see it.

I'm sorry Alhaji Buhari we are not blessed rather we are cursed because of you.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by iyatrustee(f): 2:55pm On Mar 18, 2016
I enjoyed reading through! He is a witty writer. Keep at it brother and you would be one of the Simon Kolawole's, Mahmud Jega's soon



I am sad already. Nigeria has more than enough resources than most countries can boast of.

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by CuteInBlack(m): 2:56pm On Mar 18, 2016
We need a Revolution. Who would lead? Anyone?

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by 4nobody4every1: 2:56pm On Mar 18, 2016
Yawns cool

Re: Nigeria’s First Minister Of Sadness - By Haruna Mohammed Salisu by Nobody: 2:56pm On Mar 18, 2016
iamodenigbo1:
a wonderful article

His English is not that of someone with a 4.0 GPA. If it were any other field I would understand but not Mass Com. How do you get a 4.o GPa in Mass com with poor English and sentence composition? These are the people that will end up as journalists and start printing misleading news all because they didnt get their English right. Did you notice how he said he "demanded" to see the GM, that should have been "insisted" or "requested" also twice at least he said salaries instead of salary.

6 Likes 1 Share

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