BumBae:

Yes oh just two week ..

N u come here n write ur experience .. How body hope ur relaxing over these hols

Maka gini? Come where? Tahhh.
Body dey chill jare.. i go soon go find something chow. How is the hols at your side?

Oga Lie Muhammed go learn work here today.

kinglekan:



Maka gini? Come where? Tahhh.
Body dey chill jare.. i go soon go find something chow. How is the hols at your side?

pboring my niwqa just dry since friday nah chop i just chop ..

Michellla:
"I couldn't just stand the humiliation and was forced to leave that night after which I passed the night in an uncompleted building"

We know you lying,but continue

Lol

Nairalanders and lie be like 5and6

Funny

FlawlessRebirth2:
chai

MAKA TALK MY EXPERIENCE.....


DER WAS THIS GUY I WAS DATING,,NA SO HE CARRY ME GO HIM HOUSE OOO...(,,HE CAME DOWN TO MY BASE FOR A PROJECT,)WE SAW AND STARTED DATING...NAZO I FOLLOW M GO HUZ OO,NA WE CUN DE HIM ROOM WE CUN DE TALK,SMALL TIN CUN LEAD TO ANODA,,,,,WE STARTED KISSING AND TOUCHING......AS I CUN SAY MK I GIVE M "head" AS I JUST DE ZIP M DOWN NA I JUST HEAE ONE VOICE SHOUT,,,,"EMMA,,,,WHO IS INSIDE THAT HOUSE WITH YOU?EMMA WHAT ARE YOU DOING?.....NAZO I SHOCK ASK M WHO DE TALK....HE TELL ME SAY HIM SISTER CUN VISIT....NA SO D WOMAN DE SHOUT MK HIM OPEN D DOOR....AS HE OPEN D DOOR NAZO SHE JUSR JUMP INSIDE DE ASK ME QUESTN.....MY DEAR WHY ARE U DRESSED LIKE THIS?(I WEAR SIGLET AND TROUSERS OO)....WHAT ARE U DOING IN MY BROTHERS HOUSE(THIS GUY S 26 FOR GODS SAKE...)NAZO ME I DE LOOK LIKE WHO LOST.....D GUY GOT ANGRY...CUN ASK ME MK I STAND UP MK HIM GO DROP ME....NAZO I CARRY MY SELF GO HUZ DAHT DAH





I WEEEE NEVER FORGET

Bae, u'r cute

Another one


There's ds girl in my departmet,. She dey f*ck for state. Ds one go tell u make u pick date, time, where she go come finish U. I've been disturbing her telling her im a f*ckn messiah so she surprised me one day by saying, Tonight, Ur house till dawn. I was d happiest bastard that day, it was like i was paid 10million, i was smiling from that location , on bike, i was just smiling. I went to prepare, drank all d jedi in d world, smocked weed, i was asking my guys what more they were giving tips freely preparing for d night. She showed up 5mins to 8. I hugged her. She went inside d bathrom to shower. My Joystick was taller n stronger....and






I woke up...i passed out while she was in d bathroom. I slept off. She didnt wake me up. I was d talk of d school for two months. People laughed at me, even some lecturers heard d jist they started directing all questions at me.


Silly me

tosyne2much:
Bwahahahahaha yeeepaaaa ! E go be like say make ground swallow you up

Oga, you too dey laugh.

Guys no dey laugh too much

Eeya.i 4 share my too o.bt as a stamarra.una no go fit wait to listen.mm biko bt mak una jst live a space 4 me to comment later.

BumBae:
pboring my niwqa just dry since friday nah chop i just chop ..

Babe nor go fat ooooo

saintdennis:
Hmm upon all my escapades ain't got one rily badt experience so I will share a close shave with death/better injury cos of konji back in skul.

Mary(not real name) had the best shaped & sized azz I ever seen, the type you only see on tv and magazines, met her @ a party held @ S&T barracks Found out she's in my dept but running p/t program, has a bf (a cultist) but jeez that body make me risk collect number.

Fast-forward 2/3 times we hooked up @ a friends place in bdpa since I knw say the dude no dey enter eiye zone.

Konji make me wear bathroom slippers run go her place run shows all night then around 6am or so the next day her bf knocks on the door, she's panicking, am panicking then my guardian angel gives me sense! I go to her kitchen (self con ish). Tell her to open the door, she does, the dude walks in, I come out of the kitchen 10 seconds later with garri, rice and fresh tomatoes , greeted the obviously perplexed bf, thank Mary for giving me the money and foodstuff, slipped into my bathroom slippers and left the room.

My acting was so good the babe called to hail me, that even she believed me.

To reinforce the I am a broke guy lie (armed with the knowledge her bf spent the night with her) i went to her place by 5:30am knocked on d door and she gave me more foodstuffs.
The guy even gave me his carpet and curtains the following semester since he was graduating .

Guys ALWAYS WEAR NORMAL HOUSECLOTH AND BATHROOM SLIPPERS so you fit claim neighbour o. #freeAdvice

This is what I call Good Sense... Not common sense

kinglekan:



Babe nor go fat ooooo

Ur the third person to warn me .. Lol when gym plenty for road no fit appen

tosyne2much:
Nearly every guy has at least once in his lifetime experienced a memorable awkward moment when he was brutally embarrassed for visiting a lady either by the lady's parents, her brothers, uncle or her boyfriend whom she never told you about.

*Let me share mine*

A few years ago, I was in a long distance relationship with a very pretty lady. After several months of regular chats, calls and SMSes; I planned on how to meet with my supposed girlfriend and of course, our wishes came to reality as I travelled down to meet with her.

She entertained me with pictures and we started discussing those nasty things we used to say on the phone and how we have both been fantasising about the day we will meet, make fun and perhaps, make love. We discussed at length and later ran out of gist after which I went to the bathroom to have my bath and she followed suite after I was done. (She lived in a self-contain apartment)

We further had a little gist, we became quiet and started looking at each other just like a puppy that has not been fed for days. That was when I knew it was time for the show to begin when someone knocked on the door. She headed towards the door and opened it and here came this young man of an average height, dark sinned and a bit mancho. He didn't greet me but as a perfect gentlemen, I greeted him but I noticed he didn't respond (whether you answer of not, na ur own wahala be that, I said to myself).

What I noticed was the sudden facial expression of contempt registered on his face and the first question he asked her was what I was doing in her room and I was like wtf !! "Shey dis one dey craze ni?, who be dis dog wey no get rope for neck?" Be like say this guy no know me, even Goodluck Ebele Jonathan no fit pursue me comot for here" .... I just throway face dey reply my BBM PINGs as I no kuku get business with am

When I got the greatest shock of my life was when she introduced me to him as an ex classmate way back in secondary school and that I only came to say hello to her and would be leaving soon.. The dude started shouting calling her all sort of names and demanded I leave the room before he's forced to do what would hurt me I couldn't just stand the humiliation and was forced to leave that night after which I passed the night in an uncompleted building.

She later called and start pleading that it was her uncle and that he had gone so I should return back. I got furious and heaped curses on her never to call me again..

I later deleted her number, blocked her on whatsapp and unfriend her on facebook.

I have never felt embarrassed like this in my life all because of punni

Guys, don't be shy, share that embarrassing moment of yours and spread the fun

Guys una dey try oooo I no fit pass d nite 4 woman cabal.

Mine happened in 2013, It was my roommate's birthday, we was all tipsy so I told my roommate I'd pass the night at my boyfriend's and she said she'd go clubbing with her boyfriend. Later on, my boyfriend and i decided to go to my place instead of his since my place is closer to the birthday venue. we got home, 'had fun' and slept naked. 4am my roommate came in with her boyfriend, expecting me to be at my boyfriend's opened the door with her key, turned on the light. My boobs almost flew from my chest because of the way I jumped. We were just so embarrassed. my boyfriend starred avoiding my roommate, and whenever I c my roommate's bf, I wish I could disappear

tosyne2much:
Nearly every guy has at least once in his lifetime experienced a memorable awkward moment when he was brutally embarrassed for visiting a lady either by the lady's parents, her brothers, uncle or her boyfriend whom she never told you about.

*Let me share mine*

A few years ago, I was in a long distance relationship with a very pretty lady. After several months of regular chats, calls and SMSes; I planned on how to meet with my supposed girlfriend and of course, our wishes came to reality as I travelled down to meet with her.

She entertained me with pictures and we started discussing those nasty things we used to say on the phone and how we have both been fantasising about the day we will meet, make fun and perhaps, make love. We discussed at length and later ran out of gist after which I went to the bathroom to have my bath and she followed suite after I was done. (She lived in a self-contain apartment)

We further had a little gist, we became quiet and started looking at each other just like a puppy that has not been fed for days. That was when I knew it was time for the show to begin when someone knocked on the door. She headed towards the door and opened it and here came this young man of an average height, dark sinned and a bit mancho. He didn't greet me but as a perfect gentlemen, I greeted him but I noticed he didn't respond (whether you answer of not, na ur own wahala be that, I said to myself).

What I noticed was the sudden facial expression of contempt registered on his face and the first question he asked her was what I was doing in her room and I was like wtf !! "Shey dis one dey craze ni?, who be dis dog wey no get rope for neck?" Be like say this guy no know me, even Goodluck Ebele Jonathan no fit pursue me comot for here" .... I just throway face dey reply my BBM PINGs as I no kuku get business with am

When I got the greatest shock of my life was when she introduced me to him as an ex classmate way back in secondary school and that I only came to say hello to her and would be leaving soon.. The dude started shouting calling her all sort of names and demanded I leave the room before he's forced to do what would hurt me I couldn't just stand the humiliation and was forced to leave that night after which I passed the night in an uncompleted building.

She later called and start pleading that it was her uncle and that he had gone so I should return back. I got furious and heaped curses on her never to call me again..

I later deleted her number, blocked her on whatsapp and unfriend her on facebook.

I have never felt embarrassed like this in my life all because of punni

Guys, don't be shy, share that embarrassing moment of yours and spread the fun

Hahahahahahaha.....and they say guys sabi lie well, that girl tho. Bros, then I would have done worse if I were in your shoes, it wouldn't end in just heaping curses. But the correct thing you would have done is to go back when she called you to come back, rekindle the starring mood una dey before, chop kpekus and pack your bag and leave immediately, how can you loose both ways, on top that, you come sleep inside uncompleted building, hotel no dey around??

winkmart:
Visited one mumu, she no even offer me water and she want make I marry am

you don send her recharge card before?

Observing like a foreign observer

I just sitdon jeje with my 5D tv deyy watch epic revelations buh sha I know some na lies buh yea constructive nd hard-to-believe its a lie lies lmao.

Have laughed my brains out..funny thread.

BumBae:

Ur the third person to warn me .. Lol when gym plenty for road no fit appen

As a stake holder in BumBae's enterprise, i nor wan make the market value of the booty drop.

chibwike:
the answer is for which of the questions.

The first or the second.

. Lolz... The second...

saintdennis:
Hmm upon all my escapades ain't got one rily badt experience so I will share a close shave with death/better injury cos of konji back in skul.

Mary(not real name) had the best shaped & sized azz I ever seen, the type you only see on tv and magazines, met her @ a party held @ S&T barracks Found out she's in my dept but running p/t program, has a bf (a cultist) but jeez that body make me risk collect number.

Fast-forward 2/3 times we hooked up @ a friends place in bdpa since I knw say the dude no dey enter eiye zone.

Konji make me wear bathroom slippers run go her place run shows all night then around 6am or so the next day her bf knocks on the door, she's panicking, am panicking then my guardian angel gives me sense! I go to her kitchen (self con ish). Tell her to open the door, she does, the dude walks in, I come out of the kitchen 10 seconds later with garri, rice and fresh tomatoes , greeted the obviously perplexed bf, thank Mary for giving me the money and foodstuff, slipped into my bathroom slippers and left the room.

My acting was so good the babe called to hail me, that even she believed me.

To reinforce the I am a broke guy lie (armed with the knowledge her bf spent the night with her) i went to her place by 5:30am knocked on d door and she gave me more foodstuffs.
The guy even gave me his carpet and curtains the following semester since he was graduating .

Guys ALWAYS WEAR NORMAL HOUSECLOTH AND BATHROOM SLIPPERS so you fit claim neighbour o. #freeAdvice

My guy! I tot I was d smartest until I met u. U smart! Like soon to be a millionaire kinda smart

Michellla:
i hope not......we got four bulldogs though.beware

What if he's a dog whisperer..

Monalisa185:

the weather makes alotta sense...like you are missing plenty oo ...
what you been up to?

puedo ver que vives en espana? ¿Donde exactamente?

DPricey1:

Mine happened in 2013, It was my roommate's birthday, we was all tipsy so I told my roommate I'd pass the night at my boyfriend's and she said she'd go clubbing with her boyfriend. Later on, my boyfriend and i decided to go to my place instead of his since my place is closer to the birthday venue. we got home, 'had fun' and slept naked. 4am my roommate came in with her boyfriend, expecting me to be at my boyfriend's opened the door with her key, turned on the light. My boobs almost flew from my chest because of the way I jumped. We were just so embarrassed. my boyfriend starred avoiding my roommate, and whenever I c my roommate's bf, I wish I could disappear

My
boobs almost flew from my chest because of the way I jumped.
#ROFTL...I LAUGH FALL FROM BED

iambibi:
. Lolz... The second...

Ehen....for you to wake from your sweet sleep just to answer mentions (my mention)....shows am on the right track.


why did you skip the first question.

tosyne2much:
Nearly every guy has at least once in his lifetime experienced a memorable awkward moment when he was brutally embarrassed for visiting a lady either by the lady's parents, her brothers, uncle or her boyfriend whom she never told you about.

*Let me share mine*

A few years ago, I was in a long distance relationship with a very pretty lady. After several months of regular chats, calls and SMSes; I planned on how to meet with my supposed girlfriend and of course, our wishes came to reality as I travelled down to meet with her.

She entertained me with pictures and we started discussing those nasty things we used to say on the phone and how we have both been fantasising about the day we will meet, make fun and perhaps, make love. We discussed at length and later ran out of gist after which I went to the bathroom to have my bath and she followed suite after I was done. (She lived in a self-contain apartment)

We further had a little gist, we became quiet and started looking at each other just like a puppy that has not been fed for days. That was when I knew it was time for the show to begin when someone knocked on the door. She headed towards the door and opened it and here came this young man of an average height, dark sinned and a bit mancho. He didn't greet me but as a perfect gentlemen, I greeted him but I noticed he didn't respond (whether you answer of not, na ur own wahala be that, I said to myself).

What I noticed was the sudden facial expression of contempt registered on his face and the first question he asked her was what I was doing in her room and I was like wtf !! "Shey dis one dey craze ni?, who be dis dog wey no get rope for neck?" Be like say this guy no know me, even Goodluck Ebele Jonathan no fit pursue me comot for here" .... I just throway face dey reply my BBM PINGs as I no kuku get business with am

When I got the greatest shock of my life was when she introduced me to him as an ex classmate way back in secondary school and that I only came to say hello to her and would be leaving soon.. The dude started shouting calling her all sort of names and demanded I leave the room before he's forced to do what would hurt me I couldn't just stand the humiliation and was forced to leave that night after which I passed the night in an uncompleted building.

She later called and start pleading that it was her uncle and that he had gone so I should return back. I got furious and heaped curses on her never to call me again..

I later deleted her number, blocked her on whatsapp and unfriend her on facebook.

I have never felt embarrassed like this in my life all because of punni

Guys, don't be shy, share that embarrassing moment of yours and spread the fun

U no well. U travel go see woman wey u never ever see before. U no book hotel u want go sleep for her house? Bomb de ur head. That guy supose nack small sense into ur head.

victorjoe:


U no well. U travel go see woman wey u never ever see before. U no book hotel u want go sleep for her house? Bomb de ur head. That guy supose nack small sense into ur head.

Baba u no go blame me oooo

wristbangle:
Two years ago, similar experience happened to me when I paid a courtesy visit to my girlfriend who complained that I am not the caring type (hmm honestly women are complicated beings, this is someone I had to miss a job offer just to satisfy her selfish attention; chai lalasticlala can bear me witness that I have suffered in the hands of Women, he should push this article to FP so that guys can learn from my story )

BACK TO THE STORY

So eventually I visited her but the greatest shock of my life was when my girlfriend told me to hide in the roof because she claimed that the male visitor knocking @ her door is a cultist.

I had no choice than to give in to her advice. Apart from the fact that the roof terribly stained my shirt, rats, cockroaches and mosquitoes were busy making jest of me by romancing my body anyhow . Now the real shocker was when I peeped through the roof to view what was going on between the cult guy and my girlfriend, my eyes went red when I saw the guy giving my ex girlfriend doggy style intimacy.

I couldn't hold the heartbreak, deceit and tears rolling from my eyes and when I shouted "Tola has killed me oo". I fell from the roof, hit my head against the floor and fainted immediately. I woke up in the hospital when the doctor told me that I have been unconscious for several days.


Hmmm women!

@ ireneony and falconey, weldone oo

.. chaiii.. I love your super story bro and your exclamations were cool and funny as Bleep ..

Vision2045:

My boobs almost flew from my chest because of the way I jumped. #ROFTL...I LAUGH FALL FROM BED

Don't laugh at me na

chibwike:
Ehen....for you to wake from your sweet sleep just to answer mentions (my mention)....shows am on the right track.
why did you skip the first question.

.. Lolz... Right track? For your plastic mind abi .... I skipped it because it doesn't hav an ansa..