Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? - Romance - Nairaland
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| Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by ijaya1: 11:14pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
i m approaching 30 and still not married (thanks to job hunting) .. now i cant expect a 21 years who would be my wife to so naturally fit in my age range itself .. and i heard my neighbor say that those who marry at later age don't get good relationship with wife ... is late marriage such a curse, please provide opinion based on your experience. Lalasticlala, Eddygourdo,Tallesty1, momoftheyear16, 4C2215131, cholls, Qualer, halfricanadian tosyne2much ozo8080 1 Like |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by halfricanadian(f): 11:23pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
Age has nothing to do with dis If u destinied to have a good wife nothing will change dat Vice versa 3 Likes |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by tripplephi: 11:25pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
ITS ACTUALLY THE OPPOSITE..... so dont believe that crap... just do your findings 1 Like |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Dygeasy(m): 11:31pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
Do you have a GOOD job now? 1 Like |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Nobody: 11:33pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
The assumption that men who marry late don't get good wives stems from the idea that at such ages, there is increased external pressure for him to settle down, and this leads him to make hasty and at times, forced decisions as to choosing who to marry. It becomes more or less like a "first come first serve" kind of thing, where he is inclined to marry the first "good" woman that comes his way, without taking time to study her to know if she is the right person for him, before tying the knot, and without being emotionally prepared to handle the complexities of marriage. But still, this can only happen if the man succumbs to such pressure. So, in my opinion, this is the only logical explanation to such supposition. Anything other than that is just baseless superstition and warped notions. 5 Likes |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by ivyT(f): 11:35pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
Are u kidding us? Just 30 nd u want gv yasef high BP,guy go relax joor 2 Likes |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Nobody: 11:36pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
And you believed such? I doubt you're 30 (no offense) 1 Like |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Smellymouth: 11:37pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
Angelberry: |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Nobody: 11:40pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
[quote author=Smellymouth post=44564960][/quote] kilode  longest time! |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Cholls(m): 11:43pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
my brother..... Whether you are 21 years old or 41... chances of a 'good' marriage are very slim. Marriage is a business transaction... its not natural. So adjusting with a new person just like you did with blood relatives is always tough. Plus, in Nigeria, the laws are so skewed that if a woman wants... she can destroy you, your family, your reputation, your career... if she knows someone at the top. The reason 'neighbors' told you to marry early is because its stereotypical to think that a younger wife will be naive and will 'adjust'. But thats not true... these days I see young men studying hard and working 10-12 hours a day with no benefits... while young women enjoying on weekends and on weekdays and getting better salary packages. Women these days are much smarter than men of equal age. They get 5-10 boyfriends before marriage and have equally abused their pockets in the process. Their condition of marriage is - for ready made men - with atleast 10 million naira per annum salary package, height not less than 5 feet 7 inches... and should have his own apartment and car (parents must either be dead or away in their own homes). My advise is to realize that marriage is just another burden. If you think that your wife will help you in future when you are sick or depressed... then thats a chance... and you are giving up your whole life for that 'small' chance. If you accept this... then life will only get better. 3 Likes |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by vicstar(m): 11:46pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
itz based on your believe mate!  I believe whatever I see in the bible and nothing else |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by babyfaceafrica: 11:47pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
Bro....why you dey f.up like this?..at 30 and you still belive this yam and egg story.....dere is nuthing like age when it comes to getting a good wife...when you think you are ready ,marry...marriage is not a race..get a good job first ,then you can think about marriage...just 30 and you dey shake...chai,chai,chai!!!!!! 2 Likes |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Smellymouth: 11:52pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by ijaya1: 11:57pm On Apr 09, 2016 |
Cholls:Sir, wow! This really motivates me. Thanks. |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by 4C2215131: 12:01am On Apr 10, 2016 |
ijaya1: First off, dispel from your mind any notion that those that get married late end up with the short end of the stick. That is total bull crap. Time has nothing to with the success of a marriage. A man could get married at 50 to his partner who is say 30,40 or 45. They can have a blissful union irrespective of the age at which they both got married. Age has nothing to do with a cantankerous wife being more bitchy or a philandering husband being more lascivious in his attitude. It's about who the person really is inside. While conceding to the fact that age may have an effect on the attitude of certain individuals, it is not proven that this is so for everyone. A woman that cheats on her spouse at 50 would likely have done so at 23. It's all about our deep-seated proclivities and disposition to certain things. Now, with respect to the age gap thingy, yes, they may be issues with fit as a woman that's say 25 years old is definitely not a contemporary of a man who is 45 years old. BUT this is not a given as it is all about love and the ability of the lady in our example to for example work on her self by her ability to develop a liking for 'things' that are more likely to suit her hubby given his age for example, his taste in music may be different from hers. While she'd still be enamoured to artists such as say Wizkid for example, her hubby might consider his music noise given that his generation sort of has a disconnect with what wizkid represents; youthful exuberance. And believe it or not, such simple thing as a different taste in music, dressing, and world-view can make or break a marriage. While at 45 he considers her dressing in bum- shorts inappropriate for a housewife, she considers it to be no big deal at least she ain't the only one doing it. Then the simple arguments start. He feels she's too concerned about these things and takes exception to her young friends that he feels are influencing her negatively while she sees him as a 'fake'and 'local' guy that's against her expressing her individuality and/or sexuality. This is just an example. There could be other issues such as church/mosque which he takes serious and she doesn't find a big deal, his group of friends that are boring to her, his outing to events are too 'mature'for her liking etc. Then the nagging from both ends commence. The groundwork for the break up has been laid. Now understand that it may not lead to a breakup as he still loves her as she does him. It's just that they both see the world differently informed by their ages. Now they can decide to really sit down and make sacrifices from both sides (she stops putting on the bum-shorts while he takes her out to hip events more regularly while not castigating her music choice as a disturbance) or insist on being selfish, proud and pigheaded thus messing up any chance of reconciliation and slowly, one day, they both get fed up and the whole thing packs up. When asked later why he left her he retorts by saying "She kept behaving like a spoilt brat" while she says "his thinking is too old for my liking". So, like you've guessed it depends on both parties. A girl of 21 can definitely get married to a man of thirty (far better than FFK's love life right now where he has about 28 years on the mother of his baby) as long as this understanding is there. Maybe they have far more things in common than they have in differences. It's all about understanding and compromise. |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Nobody: 12:05am On Apr 10, 2016 |
Smellymouth:Good to see you..you're now a changed guy  |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by 4C2215131: 12:11am On Apr 10, 2016 |
ijaya1: I beg to differ that marriage is just another burden. It is definitely a lovely experience when gotten into for the right reasons. It becomes a burden when either party are in it for the wrong reasons hence the onus is on you to make sure you're hooking up with the right person (which I accept is not so easy to know but is possible if you can take your time to marry two factors; the ability to be in love and also the ability to be practical-seeing your partner for who they really are and not romanticising any shortcomings you have noticed in them that could spell doom later on.) This is what causes a lot of the 'burden' in marriage. Ignoring the warning signs (there are always there, it's as if nature or God is trying to tell you something) on the basis of blind love and diving head first into the union only to regret later. Marry both factors I mentioned above and you'd be the better for it. No matter how much your partner or yourself try to hide a defect in character, it will definitely show as you cannot maintain the pretense ad infinitum. A potential partner that is watching out for this signs will pick them up immediately. It's left to them to decide whether they're ready to work it out or leave. Folks in love always think that they can change their partners. Therein lies the problem as people hardly change, they just get modified for better or worse. 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Smellymouth: 12:30am On Apr 10, 2016 |
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| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by SweetJustice: 12:43am On Apr 10, 2016 |
Smellymouth:how do u come up with these pictures? |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Smellymouth: 12:54am On Apr 10, 2016 |
2 Likes
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| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by amokeme(f): 1:01am On Apr 10, 2016 |
ijaya1:and why can't a 21 year old fit into your age? When in search for love, don't listen to people.. They probably will be talking from their own experience. And the fact it went wrong with them doesn't mean it won't go well for you. Be focus and don't be desperate. It's never a competition, so relax and look well. (Pray too) forever is too long to be stuck with the wrong person... so choose wisely  1 Like |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by halfricanadian(f): 1:12am On Apr 10, 2016 |
amokeme: I dont even bliv in love any more 1 Like |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by amokeme(f): 1:23am On Apr 10, 2016 |
halfricanadian:that's the personal experience I'm talking about. Since you don't believe in love, you tend to advise him towards your line of believe which might be misleading. I for instance will choose respect over love. (That doesn't mean I don't believe in love even tho iv been hurt a few times, ) The OP should just trust his heart |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Kenzico(m): 1:23am On Apr 10, 2016 |
i was here to view comments |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by halfricanadian(f): 1:25am On Apr 10, 2016 |
amokeme: Love anoda demonic word to hurt people nd destroy dem Goodluck with love |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by amokeme(f): 1:30am On Apr 10, 2016 |
halfricanadian:with the wrong person YES but with the right person, it's bliss |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by halfricanadian(f): 1:31am On Apr 10, 2016 |
amokeme: With either person its demonic very demonic |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by amokeme(f): 1:33am On Apr 10, 2016 |
halfricanadian:toh, happy birthday to you and your school of thought, whatever rocks your boat  |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by halfricanadian(f): 1:34am On Apr 10, 2016 |
amokeme: Tank u |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Tallesty1(m): 5:37am On Apr 10, 2016 |
You may not be a good husband if you continue taking what people say serious. 1 Like |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by ednut1(m): 6:26am On Apr 10, 2016 |
not true. but most times dey get married in a haste no time for yeye courtship and dey marry a stranger. who might show dem pepper |
| Re: Is It True That Those Who Marry At Later Age Dont Get Good Wife ? by Eddygourdo(m): 6:53am On Apr 10, 2016 |
ijaya1:hahahahaha havent you heard that wine is better with age ? oga you are at a right age bro. it take a mature man to handle the issues women bring to the marriage table and thus its no surprise at the high rate of divorce since children and immature peeps started getting married instead of dating. that being said, please not having a job is not a reason not to have a lady you wanna settle down with. its better you get one now who sees you and loves you for you in hope that your job situation abates , rather that the gold digger who loves the working class man on suit. do not believe the tale that all women love money men and wont date a struggling man, you aren't looking for all women , but your wife , and thus she must be an exception to the rule that affects all women. please find someone fast pending when a great job comes. dont mind what these nairaland girls say , they sound differently and more reasonably in person. happy sunday. 2 Likes |
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