dankol:
[b]CHAPTER NINE
CONTINUE JARE JARE

Also, in school, I mean the Pre-degree stuff- (na this one funny me pass), I and another zealous brother started a fellowship which began to grow in membership, I was like supporting him anyway. Some other guys who were also sound in the word, joined us to preach, pray and you know, keep the fire burning.

Now, I and my co-founder live off-campus so, we allowed two of these word seasoned brothers to coordinate from the hostel. Things were going well, suddenly, these two brothers, decline to be joining us in the Friday fellowship. Suddenly a large chunk of members withdrew. I found out that, they had started their own fellowship which was slated for Saturday. So they told their would-be members not to join us again and since 90% of students lived in the hostel, most went with them. It was a Power play which I understand very well. Now prior to this breakaway, the overzealous guys were brainwashed by one of the lecturers teaching us, he took them to his church. I did not know what he did to them but they were never the same again. When they came back, they told me and my co-founder that, we should make the fellowship an arm of the man’s church and that after our Friday meeting’s. We should encourage all members to go for church service.

I was shocked because they were speaking with so much authority. Well, I was glad about the kind of nature, my co-founder has, we both did not agree to the offer because it negates why it was even started in the first place because, we do not take offering. Now making us a student church of some rookie church will make us take orders from the church which will surely request we take offering and even tithe. They refused and to spoil the fun, they said, “God told them so”.
So when, the break-away occurred, I was not surprised that it occurred but I was surprised at the temerity and tenacity of these guys. At what age? They are already usurping power. Since, they now control, majority of the fellowship, Personally, I stepped down and do not attend again. My co-founder did the same and we handed over everything to them not because we were afraid, but frankly speaking, we could not win that game. Both of us were living outside the hostel. They will win and I do not like to lose when I play game. So I, we did the honourable thing. We both had the same mindset and opinion on issues.

Now, that scenario is a typical example of what I really happening in many big churches and even smaller ones just that, we did not cause a scene. Over what? Money or fame. We never wanted any. We just wanted to fellowship. That’s all
My dear reader, na school carry me come, no be church or fellowship, so let me concentrate on the real thing, it will determine if I will be admitted or not. So my involvement with the fellowship ended even when I got admission into school proper but not UI, I never had anything to do with fellowship because, like I had affirmed earlier, I hate hypocrisy. It turns me off. And Students’ fellowship is a hypocrisy hub. How will a papa that was asking me question 2 in the exam hall come to preach to me? What will he say that will enter my ears? I can’t listen to him. Or the choir director who I know how many guys she slept with that week alone and she will come with her Lucifer voice to lead in worship. I no fit stay under that kind anointing abeg except I don’t know. That was why I opted completely for the church, these stuff do happen in church, but it’s not as open as it is in student circles.
[/b]

This is a rather unfortunatel state of the church. It was well predicted in the Bible, and Jesus Christ wondered if He would find true faith on earth when He returns. There's however a disconnect between this common trend and a total disbelief in God.

[b]CHAPTER NINE
CONTINUE JARE JARE JOR
Back to the church, since I now know what am up against, I treaded more carefully but not too careful to be embarrassed. It was a vigil; this time I lead in worship/praise. Everywhere was agog, those speaking in Arabic, hindu, Swahili, Soweto, Zulu, Igbira and as many tongues you can think of, ensured after I left the stage. English became the official language about five minutes later. My brother, My dear Pastor’s wife was looking at me with venom in her eyes. I noticed it because, I was at the front sit opposite her. She sat down while everyone was lost in another realm- it is tradition that you sit in front if you are a lead singer with your back-ups there. So during the service, this boy that was following me bumper to bumper was telling me how nice the worship was and that I sang one song, he did not know, I should write it down for him. As I was about to reply him to wait till the vigil is over. I just saw someone’s frame over me from the front because I had to turn back. I turned to see my pastor’s wife warning me not to disturb the church service. I mean right in front of everyone. I apologized to her and she left. I was so embarrassed and pissed off. But I kept my cool.
Now, there is this brother who was consistent, fervent and faithful (to the best of my knowledge). The guy is sound but when I got close to him, he told me, he is a FLSC holder. I could not believe my eyes. I made enquiry, I can’t recall what stuff he does but poverty is written all over him that, his hair was as grown as a lady’s own. His shoes na die. The one that touched me most was his belt, it is held by one strand of rope. And he has been coming to church, steady, everyone knows him and he is also very friendly. Yet no one saw the needs of his life. Well, I did see it and I did what I could for him even in my own poverty. I was far better than him. My own na square root of his own. My pain was that, the church had well-to-do men, men of timber and caliber, cream de la crème of Ibadan city but none saw his wretchedness nor saw it fit to help him. But if na church matter, na dem donate pass. Why? they want more blessing because as you give God, him go double am for you. (What a delusion!). I recall, one of them vividly, he was a senior editor with a reputable newspaper firm in Nigeria, when he comes to church, na from him agbada you go know, money dey this country. Pastor, no dey joke with am oo… steady prayer for him as he doles out the cash and gifts. Anyway, he died a bitter man- that is not a story for you.

Several times when the Pastor’s wife is given charge to lead in prayer, she would hand over the microphone to her son to sing for a few minutes and then spirit go enter her. She go dey prophecy oooo. Na evil , evil she dey see ooo. One day, she prophesied that, God told her, there are three persons sent to the church to destroy it and that they are agents. She said one of them is in the choir, she was pointing towards the choir and the other two, she no mention where them dey. Chai, I don suffer. She was referring to me. Let me say this, like I said, all eyes are on me, I was closely being monitored, when I am discussing with someone, someone is eavesdropping. Now, I think, they planned that one of their faction member-one of the pastor’s daughter to begin to be friendly and warm up to me. That girl give me green light die. (LOL) My dear reader, there are different kinds of green light. We have grin light, gre light, greeeeen light and we have green light. Whichever one she was giving. I was not interested. Na me una won put for trap. Outside that, I had a feeling that, the girl developed strong feeling for me. But I don’t care. Whether, it was a trap or not, my faith was too strong for one seductress to shake me, not even the daughter of someone who wants to see me disgraced. It can never happen. I played my part well with her. I never called her. She does all the calling and I never spoke beyond religious issues. When she got tired, she backed out herself.

All their plans did not work on me; I was very careful. Until, she (I mean, the pastor’s wife) crossed her boundary, though, I did not react as I ought to but I let her know, there are limits. What did she do?
It was a vigil again, I know many will be wondering, why is most event vigil, let me explain, Sunday services, the Pastor is always around to do his duties, but not during the week, so the wife is in charge during the week and vigils fall within her jurisdiction. That Night, she requested that all workers come early for some impartation. I was there, she led us in some serious warfare prayers and after which, she began to lay hands on everybody. I was in conflict, will this woman put her hands on me? I can’t let her do that. When she got to me, I shifted my head and told her no ma’m. She looked at me and said, it is a must. I told her am sorry, no one touches my head even if you are the G.O. She said, then, I won’t minister. I agreed. It was an open vigil outside. So the vigil went on, the son ministered and as she was about to preach, she called her son and embraced him and said, using the microphone, you are star, you will shine brighter than your equals. Everyone shouted, Amen! Including me. Seriously the boy is good, he just needed some discipline.
[/b]

dankol:
[b]CHAPTER NINE
CONTINUE JARE JARE JOR
Back to the church, since I now know what am up against, I treaded more carefully but not too careful to be embarrassed. It was a vigil; this time I lead in worship/praise. Everywhere was agog, those speaking in Arabic, hindu, Swahili, Soweto, Zulu, Igbira and as many tongues you can think of, ensured after I left the stage. English became the official language about five minutes later. My brother, My dear Pastor’s wife was looking at me with venom in her eyes. I noticed it because, I was at the front sit opposite her. She sat down while everyone was lost in another realm- it is tradition that you sit in front if you are a lead singer with your back-ups there. So during the service, this boy that was following me bumper to bumper was telling me how nice the worship was and that I sang one song, he did not know, I should write it down for him. As I was about to reply him to wait till the vigil is over. I just saw someone’s frame over me from the front because I had to turn back. I turned to see my pastor’s wife warning me not to disturb the church service. I mean right in front of everyone. I apologized to her and she left. I was so embarrassed and pissed off. But I kept my cool.
Now, there is this brother who was consistent, fervent and faithful (to the best of my knowledge). The guy is sound but when I got close to him, he told me, he is a FLSC holder. I could not believe my eyes. I made enquiry, I can’t recall what stuff he does but poverty is written all over him that, his hair was as grown as a lady’s own. His shoes na die. The one that touched me most was his belt, it is held by one strand of rope. And he has been coming to church, steady, everyone knows him and he is also very friendly. Yet no one saw the needs of his life. Well, I did see it and I did what I could for him even in my own poverty. I was far better than him. My own na square root of his own. My pain was that, the church had well-to-do men, men of timber and caliber, cream de la crème of Ibadan city but none saw his wretchedness nor saw it fit to help him. But if na church matter, na dem donate pass. Why? they want more blessing because as you give God, him go double am for you. (What a delusion!). I recall, one of them vividly, he was a senior editor with a reputable newspaper firm in Nigeria, when he comes to church, na from him agbada you go know, money dey this country. Pastor, no dey joke with am oo… steady prayer for him as he doles out the cash and gifts. Anyway, he died a bitter man- that is not a story for you.

Several times when the Pastor’s wife is given charge to lead in prayer, she would hand over the microphone to her son to sing for a few minutes and then spirit go enter her. She go dey prophecy oooo. Na evil , evil she dey see ooo. One day, she prophesied that, God told her, there are three persons sent to the church to destroy it and that they are agents. She said one of them is in the choir, she was pointing towards the choir and the other two, she no mention where them dey. Chai, I don suffer. She was referring to me. Let me say this, like I said, all eyes are on me, I was closely being monitored, when I am discussing with someone, someone is eavesdropping. Now, I think, they planned that one of their faction member-one of the pastor’s daughter to begin to be friendly and warm up to me. That girl give me green light die. (LOL) My dear reader, there are different kinds of green light. We have grin light, gre light, greeeeen light and we have green light. Whichever one she was giving. I was not interested. Na me una won put for trap. Outside that, I had a feeling that, the girl developed strong feeling for me. But I don’t care. Whether, it was a trap or not, my faith was too strong for one seductress to shake me, not even the daughter of someone who wants to see me disgraced. It can never happen. I played my part well with her. I never called her. She does all the calling and I never spoke beyond religious issues. When she got tired, she backed out herself.

All their plans did not work on me; I was very careful. Until, she (I mean, the pastor’s wife) crossed her boundary, though, I did not react as I ought to but I let her know, there are limits. What did she do?
It was a vigil again, I know many will be wondering, why is most event vigil, let me explain, Sunday services, the Pastor is always around to do his duties, but not during the week, so the wife is in charge during the week and vigils fall within her jurisdiction. That Night, she requested that all workers come early for some impartation. I was there, she led us in some serious warfare prayers and after which, she began to lay hands on everybody. I was in conflict, will this woman put her hands on me? I can’t let her do that. When she got to me, I shifted my head and told her no ma’m. She looked at me and said, it is a must. I told her am sorry, no one touches my head even if you are the G.O. She said, then, I won’t minister. I agreed. It was an open vigil outside. So the vigil went on, the son ministered and as she was about to preach, she called her son and embraced him and said, using the microphone, you are star, you will shine brighter than your equals. Everyone shouted, Amen! Including me. Seriously the boy is good, he just needed some discipline.you are simply an agnostic like me and not an atheist lol

[/b]

you are simply an agnostic like me and not an atheist lol

stephenmorris:
you are simply an agnostic like me and not an atheist lol

Yes boss, i am an agnostic

[b]CHAPTER NINE
CONTINUUM
All things being equal, that was insubordination, and I ought to be punished. She raised the issue with the workers on Sunday morning with her husband present. I suspect, the husband disagreed with her when it was discussed at home. So when she raised it, the man collected the microphone, and asked that, I see him after service. I was like, yes, the die is cast. I went to his office after service, I was surprised the way he approached the matter. At the end, he exonerated me and asked me to leave. His point was, I was not aggressive and not insultive, I was just making a statement of fact that, I do not like being touched on the head, but she could say her gibberish. So as I was about to leave, the wife came in, she stood by the door and began to look at me, she said “ Brother Dankol, why are you so sturborn yet calm like this”. I just laughed and left. That was the last time I had clash with her. Things were as good as normal.
Sincerely, I saw it as a test of character and faith. Yea, I just broke into the choir and displaced several persons just like that without expecting a fight? No, I should have, even though I was not expecting one having in mind that, it is the house of God. It made me realize that, it is the house of God, but controlled by other gods (Men) and as such, these gods will not let you pour sand into their garri. I may not like fame, but it naturally comes to me because of what I do and how I do it. And people get pissed off because of that, to make their matter worse, I seem not to care about how others feel about it. I really learnt a big lesson.
UI refused me admission, my co-fellowship founder and the new fellowship lords, got admission. The day that list came out was the day I knew I was strong emotionally- the choleric thing. It was a Friday, I went to the café to check, it read, “NO ADMISSION FOR JAMB NO: xxxxxxxxxx”. I was so so disappointed. I went back to school; I saw gloomy faces. Most of them already cried one bucket but were being consoled by my co-founder. Well, I do not know where their new fellowship lords were that day, but I recall, I gathered everyone, and gave them a word of encouragement. That day, many of them respected me the more because, I am also experiencing the disappointment they encountered, yet I kept calm. But seriously, I was a waiting dam under intense pressure to explode but, I can’t do it openly until I got to my room. I cried a river. I sat on my bed, thinking, see my life? All my sacrifices? All I was running around for? Abi na foundational curse? I recall, it was then I began to take the foundational curse issue serious, I began to trace by history and lineage. I realize that my Great Grand Father was an Ifa priest. I said, Alas! This is the root of my problem. Na so I start to dey bind and cast o. Even when that thought of questioning God came, the foundational curse thing was where the blame was absorbed. In fact, I wrote a book, I try to publish it but never did anyway.
In all my life till then, I have never sat for such a long time to study. Throughout my secondary school, I was not the reading type, but I make the A(s) and B(s). This one wey I read pass medical student sef. I passed the Pre-degree program cut-off but I learnt, my NECO result was the undoing. UI give a so much shit about your grades. The higher the number of A(s) and B(s), the higher your changes (I do not know if its still the same till now anyway). So I lost admission. I was too ashamed to go back home because, every God damn person knows am in school. They are not interested to know what kind of school. School na School. So what will I tell them?
This last question was what propelled me to move to Lagos to stay with my aunt.
[/b]

dankol:
[b]CHAPTER NINE
CONTINUUM
All things being equal, that was insubordination, and I ought to be punished. She raised the issue with the workers on Sunday morning with her husband present. I suspect, the husband disagreed with her when it was discussed at home. So when she raised it, the man collected the microphone, and asked that, I see him after service. I was like, yes, the die is cast. I went to his office after service, I was surprised the way he approached the matter. At the end, he exonerated me and asked me to leave. His point was, I was not aggressive and not insultive, I was just making a statement of fact that, I do not like being touched on the head, but she could say her gibberish. So as I was about to leave, the wife came in, she stood by the door and began to look at me, she said “ Brother Dankol, why are you so sturborn yet calm like this”. I just laughed and left. That was the last time I had clash with her. Things were as good as normal.
Sincerely, I saw it as a test of character and faith. Yea, I just broke into the choir and displaced several persons just like that without expecting a fight? No, I should have, even though I was not expecting one having in mind that, it is the house of God. It made me realize that, it is the house of God, but controlled by other gods (Men) and as such, these gods will not let you pour sand into their garri. I may not like fame, but it naturally comes to me because of what I do and how I do it. And people get pissed off because of that, to make their matter worse, I seem not to care about how others feel about it. I really learnt a big lesson.
UI refused me admission, my co-fellowship founder and the new fellowship lords, got admission. The day that list came out was the day I knew I was strong emotionally- the choleric thing. It was a Friday, I went to the café to check, it read, “NO ADMISSION FOR JAMB NO: xxxxxxxxxx”. I was so so disappointed. I went back to school; I saw gloomy faces. Most of them already cried one bucket but were being consoled by my co-founder. Well, I do not know where their new fellowship lords were that day, but I recall, I gathered everyone, and gave them a word of encouragement. That day, many of them respected me the more because, I am also experiencing the disappointment they encountered, yet I kept calm. But seriously, I was a waiting dam under intense pressure to explode but, I can’t do it openly until I got to my room. I cried a river. I sat on my bed, thinking, see my life? All my sacrifices? All I was running around for? Abi na foundational curse? I recall, it was then I began to take the foundational curse issue serious, I began to trace by history and lineage. I realize that my Great Grand Father was an Ifa priest. I said, Alas! This is the root of my problem. Na so I start to dey bind and cast o. Even when that thought of questioning God came, the foundational curse thing was where the blame was absorbed. In fact, I wrote a book, I try to publish it but never did anyway.
In all my life till then, I have never sat for such a long time to study. Throughout my secondary school, I was not the reading type, but I make the A(s) and B(s). This one wey I read pass medical student sef. I passed the Pre-degree program cut-off but I learnt, my NECO result was the undoing. UI give a so much shit about your grades. The higher the number of A(s) and B(s), the higher your changes (I do not know if its still the same till now anyway). So I lost admission. I was too ashamed to go back home because, every God damn person knows am in school. They are not interested to know what kind of school. School na School. So what will I tell them?
This last question was what propelled me to move to Lagos to stay with my aunt.
[/b]

Funny though sad story, sad because of the unfortunate set of people you found yourselves with. Like a saying goes, while here on earth pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional. You chose to suffer from your pains. Everyone passes through pain one way or the other, and at one point or the other. We are not yet in "Heaven" where there is no more pain. Not gaining admission or any other sort of failure should rather inspire you to try again, see where you missed it, instead of blaming God and using your 'sacrifice' as bribe for God to give you admission. May God help you sha, you need it.

[b]CHAPTER TEN
LAGOS! HERE I COME AGAIN
I called my dad informing him, I would be moving over to Lagos for greener pastures. Soon, I settled down with my aunt and began to hunt for work. How I got this particular job was quite an eye-opener for me. If it were by certification, I would not even make it to the interview. I applied for a secretarial job, I was called for interview. Lo and Behold, when I saw persons who were also present for the interview. Two persons had Masters with them, about the remaining five persons had either a B.Sc or ND even in Secretarial Studies and Shorthand. I had given up on it. In fact, I wanted to excuse myself and leave after reminding myself that, I only have my SSCE, with no experience. But, while contemplating, the MD of the firm came out and addressed us and said, the interview is simple, “Walk up to any Computer available and type your CV, send the print out to me, in my office in 5minutes. Thanks”. He walked away. It was like a dream, so I get hope be dat. I dashed forward to a free computer, powered it, opened the necessary application and began to type away as if my life depends on it. By four minutes, thirty seconds, we were asked to round up and submit else we have forfeit the whole exercise. I did just that immediately. By the time I stood up, about two ladies were sobbing seriously, they could not power the computer. One other guy was sweating like a Christmas Goat; he could not submit. So for my mind, I was like, “Na so! three don comot”. About ten minutes later, I and one other lady (An ND holder) was called in. The MD was surprised yet impressed that I, with the least certification came top among others. Seriously, I was surprised. The following Monday, it was me and the ND girl who resumed. Na so I get job ooo (can somebody give Jesus praise in the house!).

Now at the office, a lot of intelligent discussions used to ensue because most of us at work were from different brand of Christianity and most of all, the boss was a Muslim. He is very much related to a former deputy Governor of a south west state. He was so influential meehhn! But I got into trouble with him because of my belief in Jesus. I will get back to that later. There is this senior officer of the company who is of this sit-at-home-to-worship-jesus brand of Christianity. We always argue. He was the one who enlightened me about Who the church is and not what the church is? He said, the church is you and I. He made this statement, which I can never forget, he said, “The Chruch today does not preach the gospel of Jesus which is the gospel of DISTRIBUTION, but rather, they would preach their own gospel, which is the gospel of ACQUISITION.” What he meant was that, the church is failing in her responsibility to do the needful as it was done in Acts. Instead of building edifices, build soldiers of Christ! You are the church! you should be nurtured both physically and spiritually, not the buildings. I would argue with him until I read the book of Acts without any taint of biasness, I began to reason with him. In fact, our discussion, spurred me to begin to study the bible deeply that, me sef con dey get Rhema. I wrote a lot of powerful articles, a lot of songs too because, the job was not very tasking. I was most active early in the morning and later in the evening. So I got all the time in the world. That man really helped me even though I refuse to agree with him in most cases initially. Don’t blame me, that is the power of indoctrination. In church they will tell you, do not listen to anyone that tells you anything different from what you are hearing now, which is the undiluted word of God.
During this time, my kid sister just finished primary school and was supposed to assume into the secondary school. Public school are nothing to write home about, so we intend to enroll her into a private school. So, after discussion with my dad, he told me point blank, he does not have money to establish her in school and that she has to wait till the following year. I told him, no way. I will see what I can do. I called a church friend and a brother (we are seriously related somehow somehow anyway), he was teaching at a private school at home. So I asked him to help out with my sister. I sent him the little money I had and promised to balance as soon as I can.
[/b]

[b]CHAPTER TEN
CONTINUED
Now let me explain how we came to be close. Let me call him Brother D, he is another wonderful (hypocrite) called a Christian whom I trust with my life. We discuss, I know about his travails and he knows mine. I am such a person who is this lucky with getting cloths as gift. People do give me cloths. Most of the cloths, I was wearing then, were gift from different persons both within and outside the church- (I appreciate the church for that anyway). So as soon as there is new delivery for me, I would call him and another of his cousin, to pick theirs and leave the rest. We were damn close, both in the choir, - he is more into praying and preaching. He is usually regarded as the choir pastor. He really did backstab me beyond belief. (I will refer to him soon). So, even the money I was trying to put together, I couldn’t because, I had a commitment I had to keep. It affected me seriously and more importantly when I needed money. I was stranded.
One Friday morning, I got a call from a colleague from the pre-degree program who informed me of Fupre’s pume test. When? He said, the next day. Now Fupre was my second choice after Ibadan and they called for second choice candidates to come do test. I was overjoyed but that joy was short-lived. The test is in less than 24hrs. I had no money on me. I went to the accountant seeking to leave immediately, whether he approves or not. I made up my mind to leave. He did approve after I explained how urgent the matter was.
I called a brother from the church and explained things to him, he gave me some money, which I added to the one my aunt gave me. Straight to Delta State. I got to Effurun the very early hours of the new day. I recall, I spent the rest of that night on the turf in front of PTI- (it’s not the same now ooo). After the test, I met a Corper whom I became friendly with, he asked me to stay till Monday for the result else, I won’t know my fate. So I went to a branch of the church in Effurun, to seek refuge, na story ooooo. I had to sleep at Agofore park but the sacrifice was a waste. To cut Effurun story short, I was not admitted. I had to beg people for money to put my t.fare together, moreso, Pastor A, you remember him, sent me some money to help myself. Anyhow! Anyhow! I smuggled my way back to Lagos looking like a refugee.
I went straight to the office, on getting to the office, I saw the ND girl on my seat. I knew it was coming. Immediately she saw me, she told me to go see the accountant and I dashed straight to the accountant’s office, where my package was waiting for me. It was a PROMOTION LETTER FROM BEHIND. I was not much surprised it came, but it came at the wrong time. Double wahala for deadbody! I took my letter and requested for when I should come get the paltry salary for days, I have worked. He told me, I should see, the MD. At the MD’s office, he was not even looking at my face, I tried to plead with him to hear me out. He would not let me talk, he only said one thing, “Don’t expect any money, you can go”. I froze where I was and was feeling like punching someone. But I remember, na one finger, him go snap, I will be in kirirkiri. Now, I had a clash with the MD, like I said earlier, its remote cause was religion. I learnt every Sallah time, he usually hosts all staff of the company for one good week and that week was like party time for them. After work, go to his house, eat, take as much as you can home, and he will give you t.fare of atleast 1k home every blessed day. About 30 persons on his payroll. I was not just comfortable with that story after taking a look at all the staff. All of them are living from hand to mouth. Nothing meaningful is happening to them. This man is using them to enrich himself and only compensate them, once a year with that party. I won’t be part of it. The bible admonished us not to eat food dedicated to idols. Well, I got a very good excuse anyway. My aunt and her family are Muslims too. When it was time, for the first time, the MD sent me a text message to honour the invitation to his house just as I have been told. I never went not even for one day. That was the grudge he had with me.
Mind you, at the church, I was in the choir too but I had no issues because, everyone was good. It was a healthy competition and I really enjoyed my stay at the church. Though, I was extremely careful also. I had my own fair share of crushes but I ignored all of them.
I told myself Lagos is not favourable to me, I packed my things and headed back home.
[/b]

[b]
CHAPTER ELEVEN
BACK TO THE HOME CHURCH - 1
If I had other places to go, I would have done so rather than go back home to my (step) mum. Not because she is bad or evil, but I felt so ashamed, I did not gain admission after all the noise about my being in school. Mind you, with time, me and my mum began to understand each other and there were much less issues. She came to terms that, I had more influence on my siblings than her. I can’t and will never blame her for any action or inaction. We are all human and that, I do understand. Everyone wants to protect his/her interest FIRST. It’s a natural instinct. Presently, the understanding between us, is “PERFECT”.
Back to square one, as soon as I came back, Church things on my mind. A new government is in place at almost every level of hierarchy, new pastor, new choir director- a woman I so much respect because of her doggedness to do the right thing. They were not new per se, but it was like a kind of promotion. So, my churchiness was even on the increase. At a point, Mrs. Choir director began to complain that, she would not be able to cope anymore with the choir and that, I should be assisting her, unofficially. I did just that but, there was a bigger problem she was running away from. I thought, I was the only one who runs away from leadership position- let me clear myself here. I am of the school of thought that, responsibility is power. Responsibility makes you a natural leader whether you are in position of leadership or not. I have tested this theory. It is fact. If you are responsible, people will look up to you. I never realized it until much later, when I contested at the department in school.
She was appointed Head Choir director overseeing several local churches. She felt overwhelmed with the responsibility coupled with the fact that, she is married. After sometime, she stepped down from being Head Choir director. So the post was vacant. Now, with all humility, it was a perfect timing for me to grab power but I was not interested. Infact, she had submitted my name to Church Authorities to consider me in her stead. She told me to accept the offer. I rejected it immediately and made it known to everyone that I was not interested. So, the church requested that, all choir members within the jurisdiction come together to pick a suitable leader with prayer and fasting.
It was at the meeting, we appointed a new leader. Hmmm… the funny thing about this guy was that, I could see through him. He wanted fame but then he sincerely had the zeal but like I said, it was propelled by wanting to be recognized and popular. The unfortunate thing about him was that, he does not have good vocals with little knowledge about music. But he wanted the job. He got it. Immediately, he started work, brought us together, created a praise team, and serious rehearsals were going on in preparation for a Praise Concert.
[/b]

[b]CHAPTER ELEVEN
BACK TO THE HOME CHURCH - 1 CONTINUATION
The day he saw me perform, I knew that day, he marked me as a worthy competitor. Since, that day, He would choose programs where crowd are likely going to be much for himself to lead in praise/worship, and share the rest amongst us. I recall, one vigil, he was singing and on several occasions, he was just going off-key at a point, killing everyone’s zeal to sing. Mind you, that off-key thing was his regular thing but during that vigil, it was so prone even to the congregation. So he signaled me, to come take over from him and I did. Things stabilized.

Now, am not perfect, I have my down side too in music and it only becomes visible when I don’t do my training. You know as a vocalist, there are certain foods one should abstain from and other rules too. So I guess, he was looking for an opportunity to embarrass me. He got it one day.
During one of the rehearsals for the concert, there is this Hausa song, a chorister brought that we all have been working on. But, the lady who brought the song could not modulate at the point where necessary because, the song ordinarily was a high pitch song. So, he said, he would try it. He did, he messed up and got every chorister cracking. I went to him, told him to change the key of the song to a lower key of his comfort, hence lowering the pitch too on the same octave after which, he can try the original pitch later as soon as he got used to it from his comfort zone (the keyboardist was in agreement).

As soon as I stopped, speaking and saw that the keyboardist was nodding in agreement, he flared up and told me to go and sit down and that he knows what he is doing. I felt embarrassed and disappointed. Like I told you guys earlier, I am pretty innovative, it may not be such a huge stuff but can make so much difference. See, the challenge most persons have in music is that, they want to do it perfectly just the way Sinach, Ron Kenoly, Don Moen, Kirk Franklin did it. It is a good thing but they fail to know one thing, that is, “the beauty of being different! The beauty of being YOU!”. These artists we so much desire to emulate, did not get there in 2 days, they did not become good overnight. It took them years of dedication, energy, time, money and a whole lot of sacrifices,most choristers cannot even give. Then, why not work within your limit and be different. Most choristers in Nigeria do not sing except when they are in church or in a religious atmosphere– I mean gospel song ooo, let not enter secular oo if not, even God go vex for the kind song wey dey their phone. And yet they want to be a star. If you want to know how to sing, the only way is to SING! SING to perfection. Sing anywhere, everywhere at any opportunity you can. Practice they say, makes perfection.[/b]

This is become a headless rant.

Image123:


Funny though sad story, sad because of the unfortunate set of people you found yourselves with. Like a saying goes, while here on earth pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional. You chose to suffer from your pains. Everyone passes through pain one way or the other, and at one point or the other. We are not yet in "Heaven" where there is no more pain. Not gaining admission or any other sort of failure should rather inspire you to try again, see where you missed it, instead of blaming God and using your 'sacrifice' as bribe for God to give you admission. May God help you sha, you need it.

Come wey u, allow the young man talk finish then make ur comment u de disturb the thread. Biko

zeestunner:



Come wey u, allow the young man talk finish then make ur comment u de disturb the thread. Biko

Come wey u, face front. Biko, the young man no get head or tail for him thread.

[b]I took my bow legs and walked jejely to my sit. He continued to struggle with the song. The keyboard guy was getting frustrated. It was the lady who brought the song, who spoke with him to consider what I said earlier, I guess. He yielded but he still could not do it. For my perspective, I guess, the fact that the suggestion was from me, made it un-do-able for him. Everyone watched, waited. Later, he and the lady conversed and he suddenly, looked up and called me to come out to do the song. I saw him grinned at me, inside of him, was like, ok now, na you bring the suggestion, come do am make I see. To cut, the long story short, He did not laugh last in that matter. I co-lead that song during the concert with the lady who brought it.
I will try as much as I can to avoid being specific about the church structure here cos, if I do, many of you will easily detect the church and I do not want it so but if you are very much of the critical thinking type, you should be able to decode. I want to round up, this guy’s story. He was seeking for loyalists and unfortunately, he could not get mine after trying hard to get close to me. If you have read “48 laws of power”, you will understand that he was using that portion that talks about bringing your enemies closer than your friends. So, he reduced my chances of leading songs and brought up the idea of grooming others too. I bought the idea. It was something I would love to do. Help others become better than I am. It is the most fulfilling thing I have ever done in my life. Not long after, a state headquarters was established at that town to control several local churches. Now, all things being equal, my local church ought to be the secretariat of the new headquarters but due to church politics which a large chunk of it was played by Pastor C-do you still remember him, (After Pastor A left, his goodies never came from our local church again). So it was payback time, He help divert the location to a barely new local assembly that is being funded by a very senior officer of the police force. Now, the race for position started,every God damn hypocrite began to lobby. My choir director (the guy) began to lobby too for State Choir directorship. I was like, “dis guy no sabi body oo, we dey manage you for here, you won go disgrace yourself at the top.” There were three others who wanted the position too from other assemblies. At a certain point, the power brokers could not decide on whom to choose because each of them had an insider. So, to let peace reign, they asked all chorister to come choose their leader. No more prayer to choose oooo. Na casting of lot and election ooooo. Yea, he was banking on us to elect him. Well, personally, I disappointed him but I was surprised, many of our choristers also did not vote him. Well, I did not vote for anyone cos I was of the opinion that, we should seek the face of God to choose a good and reliable leader for us. Well, a new leader was chosen. It was not him. That was the beginning of his decline in church. Later, he recovered from the shock and left the choir to join the pastorage. As at the last time, heard of him. He is now a pastor too. – When a man is despirate for power, he will do anything, anywhere, anyhow to get it. I know he has a target and he might get it. Personally, I like his zeal but not what is propelling it.[/b]

[b]CHAPTER TWELVE
BACK TO HOME CHURCH- 2
In the meantime, as soon as I got back from Lagos. I went to thank Bro D for his help so far and to request for accountability on how he spent the money I sent to him. I need the receipts and every other necessary documents. He began to play defensive that, why should I ask him to render account and that it is a sign of distrust. That he has nothing to say but the most important thing is that, the girl is doing fine. Yes, that true, but the school fees ought to have been exhausted. Fees of 25k with books and by my reckoning, I had send over 25k to him. So I was not expecting any debt waiting for me. He played his way put by telling me some cock and bull stories. I let the matter go. A lot of people do not find it necessary to be accountable but sorry I do. I hate to be accused of something I never did. So keep account especially, when it has to do with money.

I refuse to work out of annoyance of what my last boss did to me. But when hunger taught me some lessons, I picked up myself and began to search for work. I called brother D, I told him to enquire if there is vacancy at their school. He said, in fact, I should write my letter and that, he is very influential on the Proprietress and that, he 101% sure of me getting a job. I quickly drafted my letter. The following day, I went to the school as he describe though, my sister attends the school. I do not mix family with work or pleasure. A close friend of mine was embarrassed by me because of this. Because we joke and laugh and eat from the same pot of food does not mean, when we meet in official capacity, we should not take things for granted. And my kid sister, understood that. I got to the school, met with a guy who interviewed me, we discussed. I got the job easy and clean. “Teacher Dankol! How far?”, I heard Brother D called from a nearby office. I thanked him because he had already done the ground work. Now the school has both Primary and a Junior Secondary section. Brother D was a staff of the Junior Secondary school while I was drafted to the primary section to teach primary 1. Chai.. it was hell for me. Teaching is one of the hardest job to do but if you have the passion or develop the passion to do it. You will enjoy it. Now, at first, I felt I could not cope. My English was too big for a primary 1 student to flow along with me. But, I seriously felt for the innocent children whose parents just throw them into school to give them time to face their businesses. Well, I love to see people better than they were if I can. I began to adjust to their ways of learning. Taking time to get to know them one after the other. Knew their strength and weakness. Many of them hate Maths because of the approach of the teacher and the way he/she threatens them when they can’t catch up. Yet, some of them were very brilliant. So I get practical with my teaching, tell them stories and did not carry cane with me. I encourage them with gifts for any first ten who would do assignment and pass them well. They picked up. Out of 32 kids, 28 were encouraging. I was so happy with myself. I am proud of those kids anytime anyday. But then, I was strict with them. It is about balancing the equation. And I don’t know how I did, but I did. It really affected me seriously that I was caught dousing off in class by the proprietress several times. But she was understanding. So, I got some money for myself and part of it went to my sister’s fees.[/b]

[b]CHAPTER TWELVE CONTINUATION
Several times, I and brother D would discuss in school. He began to tell me of how he dream dreams of the Proprietress being evil. That she started the school on a wrong foot. That she buried something around the school. The guy was just simply delusionary. That, I should stop eating the meal given to staff and a lot of abstract information. I told him, I am not convinced about all he is said except he has proofs. I was surprised he was saying all that about the woman after all the accolades he showered on her that even made me came hunting for a job there.

Later, I discovered, he had a clash with her because of me. What happened was this? When I assumed work, I notice, the mannerism at which students and pupils sing the national anthem, wrong words and a lot of this. I corrected it and even taught them, the second stanza of the national anthem. Moreso, I introduced debates, quizzes, Press club into the system. Once in a week, I ask them of current happenings. They were encouraged to read news paper and listen to t.V or Radio news. Curiosity was activated in them. We cannot be creating book-worms alone, lets make them also activity-worms. Let them be dynamic. So I thought and the idea was welcomed wholeheartedly by the school management. I never knew my guy bro. D was not happy with the development.

Why? Frankly, he was like a tin god in that school. Advice, prayer, preaching wise to the school management and they were so dependent on him and took his advice. But when, I stepped in, the paradigm changed and was tilting towards my side but it was not something I did intentionally or consciously but I was just doing what I know how to do best- HELP PEOPLE IF ITS WITHIN MY POWER. I was not doing it for the school but for the pupils/students. The future is more important to me than the present. If all those who help me become what I am today did not impart into my life or impart the wrong thing, the world would be minus one better person today.

So, the management began to involve me in management decisions including him anyway. So since, he was chief adviser, he was asked for his opinion, if it was good to push me up to the Junior Secondary school. This he vehemently opposed and argued with the management. The management were like, is he not your friend and you have seen the good job he is doing. So he began to scheme that, since, he brought me in, he would take me out- that was the clash he had with the proprietress, I did not know this until very much later.[/b]

Bros hope you haven't discontinue the story oo

KAYD007:
Bros hope you haven't discontinue the story oo

No sir, There is more to come.. just time is my constraint. I got loads of stuffs to do. bear with me. Thanks

[b]To spite him, I was moved to the Secondary section because he was threatening to leave. I felt it because I had already bonded with my pupils. But seriously, I had wanted to take a much matured class and I got it. Meanwhile, Bro D continued to burg me with his night mares he called dreams. I had to tell him point blank not to come to me again except he has evidence not his dreams or conviction. When he saw, he could not convince me he left the school. The reason I knew he left was because of the dreams and he is convinced the woman was evil but the real reason was what I described above. I began to handle all the courses he was handling.

And I am happy basically for one thing, I help shaped a lot of lives for the better. He is a choleric like me who uses FEAR as a potent weapon to achieve result. i.e. put fear in people to succumb to him. And since, am a Choleric too, choleric jam choleric = choleric factorial! He taught his students with that tool and they had no option. Even my sister could not tell me because, she knew I would react. But then, I undid all his spell on them and help them to gain better understanding. Mathematics was the basic issue. Mathematics is not hard as many seems to see it. In fact, every seconds you apply it e.g. when cooking, your brain tells you how many hours it will take to cook rice, what quantity of salt, maggi and what have you, to put. It is a natural thing but in class, it is abstract because the teacher made it so. Hence, many just do- la cram! la pour! If you are teacher reading this story, I beg you, if you do not have passion for it irrespective of what your pay is. You are being paid to ruin lives. Quit the job! Stop ruining lives of young minds who have the tendency to be great in what you would/have made them hate. Many of my students decided to stay in science because I taught them with LOVE yet discipline and not FEAR.

Bro. D began to spread rumors of me being bewitched by the Proprietress and called for prayers o. I was unhappy with him but I did not stop him because I recall, I told him, “if you think I am doing the wrong thing, please pray for me.” But when I got to know the truth behind the whole matter. I felt betrayed by a brother. He is not just a brother in church, I see him as a blood brother, the more reason I could not stomach it, so I confronted him and the rest was history. That scenerio made me only to trust myself, me and I. I found it difficult to trust people fully afterwards though I still try but am always expectant that one day, you will fall my hand.

My kid sister took after me religious-wise and I do fear for her because she is just deep neck into churchism and I hope it will lead her to the truth but the question is, would she be able to break away. Anyway, I will be closely monitoring her to lend a hand if she so desire.[/b]

[b]CHAPTER THIRTEEN
BACK TO HOME CHURCH 3
While, I never knew the truth about Bro D. and his wicked scheme. I was still very active in church but had begun to withdraw slowly because
1. I was preparing to write jamb again for the fourth time as I strongly wanted to leave that environment and the only way out is to gain admission. Mind you, my first choice was a very unpopular South South University. So, it was really far from home. I needed fresh air. So I thought
2. All these church issues/hypocrisy were beginning to affect my zeal especially when I became an addict to Nairaland Religous section and continued my discrete research. There were a lot of issues ranging from fornication, adultery, falsification of results and lots more amongst the ranks and file of church hierarchy. And I would be thinking, If “old things have indeed passed away”, Where is this ones coming from. Moreso, there won’t be need for renewal of the mind because it ought to stay new by the power of the holy ghost. Yet these people, will come and display powerfully before God and men. Well, something is definitely wrong. Yea, indeed wrong. Like I said earlier, until we admit our weakness, we can never find strength to overcome it.
3. A few more events shooked my faith terribly but I still stood my ground. I will narrate them one after the other but not necessarily sequentially.

There was this pastor, ok,let me call him brother F, cos he is no longer a pastor. because not up to one month of assumption as a pastor of my local assembly, he was removed. Why? Because he is said to be involved with two women. At first, when i got to know, it was likea joke, but it dawn on me. I had to make enquiry on why the church will have to take such unchristian decision. yes it is unchristian because, everyone has a past that we do not like to remember. But the church had to use brother F's past as a yardstick to prevent him from serving as a Pastor.

What was his offence? Brother F was a committed member of a very popular holiness church before he join us but he left because he was decieved and was trapped into a marriage with a mentally unstable lady. I will not like to discuss the modus operandi of the church with respect to marriage but by the time brother F realize his folly about "GOD'S WILL", it was too late. he got to know of his wife's predicament at the delievery of his son when the lady in question began to misbehave and almost killed herself and the child at birth. He was so angry that, he had to leave the church because he was betrayed by the same people he trust with his life called "Pastor or Men of God". he found out that, it was an arranged marriage as the parents of the lady were very influencial in church and the lady was due to be sent off, so they had to collide with the MOG to look for a gulible suitor to wed her off. Infact, according to him, the sham marriage was 80% financed by the bride's family. So after that event, he left the church but along the line, he found another lady all by himself devoid of any external influence, impregnanted her, and brought her into his house. He did not pay her dowry untill after two kids from the new wife. LOL, i no blame the man. Once beaten, twice shy.

He was told to restitute, i.e. go back tohis first wife and leave the second one. Hevehemently refused. I was shocked to hear about that kind of restitution. it is one of the dumbest thing i have heard. Restitute oyour marriage. I came to realize, the church so much believe in restitution that they are blind to certain facts about it and it implication on the christian faith. That there are things that CANNOT be practically restituted. How can a rapist restitute?
How can an assasin restitute?
Mind you, we need to know what restitution means- To restore to initial, or original manner or to it proper owner.
So how do you restore a dead man back? i.e for an assasin to effective restitute his ways. Please don't tell me that story of him going to the family of the person he killed and ask for forgiveness. That is actually sucide mission in disguise.

There are things that can be restituted and there are things that cant be restitutedin the actual sense of the word.

So, i began to ask, if i have to restitute for all my wrong doings, then what is the purpose of knowing jesus? Why did he die?
If i still have to restore/compensate for my wrongs? Mind you, he died to cleanse me from my sins including the ones i ought to restitute, so if i restitute, i got no sin for him to cleanse me from

And if this dogma of restitution is true, seriously, noone is going to be as near as a 100km close to heaven (if such a place exist). becasue, frankly, you cant remeber all your wrong doings, neither can you restitute for all of them. it is an unrealistic dogma.

So, on that basis, he was condemned by the church to be unfit to preside over a church.Because it is a church dogma. Mind you, the child from the first marriage is with himand his new family. That incidence almost made him lost his faith but he kept on anyway but never active since then till date. I did felt bad about it. it was an unfair judgement on an elect of God from my point of view.

[/b]

[b]CHAPTER THIRTEEN CONTINUED

The church I attend is a very orderly church in terms of hierarchy and in fact some posts, to me seems unnecessary. For instance, some person’s duty is to go round local churches to drum church dogma/doctrine into people’s ears, another has the duty to go around and do revivals. Whatever! One day, we were told in church to convene at the State headquarters to attend one of these Revival. The revivalist goes from state to state to perform his divine duty as prescribed by the church. So it was our turn to be visited. Well, as usual, the donation/Seed sowing bell will never stop ringing with massive response from brain-washed individuals. I am someone who hates to go to an event late, I would rather not go than be late.

So, at the place of Revival, when this man entered the church, he walked in majestically to the sit, knelt down to pray, stood up, went up to the alter to collect the microphone. He said, with anger in his voice, “Why is the church scanty like this, are they not aware of my coming. Pastor! did you inform your subordinate pastors?”. The pastor replied in affirmative. The revivalist began to preach. He is more like a critic anyway. He criticized everything that was done, and that publicity was not enough for the program. That one no enter me o. Until, he began to verbally attack people. Now he was also one of the pioneering pastors of a local church in that town. And was so lucky to have risen far above others.

So he was not happy with the state of things knowing how he left things and now that he feels things get worse. He was calling names, he would say, “Dagunro (pardon, its an example oo not real names)! Stand up, come here, you did not see me when I entered right, why did you not come to collect my bible? You are a bastard son in Christ! I was the one that made you a minister, look at how ungrateful you are.” And several other persons were being bashed, and he would narrate how he helped them and ask them to sit in front sit where he can see them. But the most painful one that got me angry and so mad inside of me was a woman. This woman is one of the gentlest persons I have ever met on earth. Her children all grown up like me, were my friends. But she was so unlucky that day. What happened?

She came in while the revivalist was pouring his venom on some dude. When he raised his eyes, he just summoned her, “Come here, Dairo! Everyone see another bastard in Christ. So you have the guts to come to a program am involved late ehe. Where is your stupid husband? I was the one who would shelter you, take you to the hospital when he would beat you to pulp. I paid some of your children’s fees. You, Ingrate. I thought you should have been a Senior Pastor by now. But it is obvious since I left, You all have been stagnant in the faith. Dairo! yours is the most painful, come here” Even Pastor C, was not left out in the bashing oooo. He asked her to wait on him by the pulpit. She stood there till he finished his message. She was crying profusely. I have never in my life see a woman broken like that. At a point, he threaten to beat her with his belt as he tried to remove it. (I know many of you will not believe this part of the story but it is the truth. So many others have seen worse). Her case was so painful because, her children were there watching her being treated that way. OVER MY DEAD BODY. I can never let it happen to a relative, how much more my mother. I will beat that pastor to a pulp and take myself to the police station. Even if you are the Vicar of Jesus.[/b]

[b]CHAPTER THIRTEEN CONTINUM

That is the height of slavery for me in the church, I could not come to terms with it. But the bible says, submit yourself to ALL Authorities. No be so? I submitted but it never stopped the fact that, I do not agree with what happened. That night, everyone went home sober. The next day, the church was full, 30minutes before time. It took Mrs. Dairo, 3 months plus to recover from that trauma. She infact, had left the church, it was pleading on every side that brought her back to church. The funny thing is that, she was already a pastor leading a small local assembly when that incident occurred. I made up my mind there, that I won’t be a Pastor else, I would fight every superior who wants to make a fool out of me. And when you do, its insubordination and one will be suspended. So, the best was to watch from the side ways. And that I did. LOL. Imagine, if I disobey my pastor, he can lock the heavens and I will not be blessed anymore until a senior pastor or that pastor unlocks it. Sounds crazy right. Ok, Let me address it.

Pastors are fond of threatening people with the story of Miriam who became a leper when she withstood Moses. Mind you, she did not do it alone, she had a co-coup plotter who was not touched by the sting of punishment that followed. And many other scriptures in the bible to make slaves of men. Chief among them is “Believe the Lord, so shall ye be established; believe his prophets, so shall ye prosper”, but I tell you. Your pastor is not better than you. You all, according I peter, are equal “Ye are a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a peculiar people ....”. You are a prophet! he is a prophet!

So what makes you better than Miriam when you confront him is that, ye are equals. The difference between you and your pastor is time to develop your spiritual prowess. And it is his duty to help grow i.e if you found a genuine one. Pastors today, make you perpetual ‘spiritual babies’.
Daddy, I want to travel, please pray for me.
Daddy, I want to buy land, pray for me
Daddy, there is witch disturbing me, pray for me
But I have not heard where, a man wants to lay with his wife and seek for prayer. I think it is necessary oooo. You just pick your phone and dial his number when the act is about to be done and ask for his blessing.

The problem with most persons that have reasons to oppose church leadership is that, they are even more greedy than the(Pastors) they are fighting.[/b]

dankol:
[b]To spite him, I was moved to the Secondary section because he was threatening to leave. I felt it because I had already bonded with my pupils. But seriously, I had wanted to take a much matured class and I got it. Meanwhile, Bro D continued to burg me with his night mares he called dreams. I had to tell him point blank not to come to me again except he has evidence not his dreams or conviction. When he saw, he could not convince me he left the school. The reason I knew he left was because of the dreams and he is convinced the woman was evil but the real reason was what I described above. I began to handle all the courses he was handling.

And I am happy basically for one thing, I help shaped a lot of lives for the better. He is a choleric like me who uses FEAR as a potent weapon to achieve result. i.e. put fear in people to succumb to him. And since, am a Choleric too, choleric jam choleric = choleric factorial! He taught his students with that tool and they had no option. Even my sister could not tell me because, she knew I would react. But then, I undid all his spell on them and help them to gain better understanding. Mathematics was the basic issue. Mathematics is not hard as many seems to see it. In fact, every seconds you apply it e.g. when cooking, your brain tells you how many hours it will take to cook rice, what quantity of salt, maggi and what have you, to put. It is a natural thing but in class, it is abstract because the teacher made it so. Hence, many just do- la cram! la pour! If you are teacher reading this story, I beg you, if you do not have passion for it irrespective of what your pay is. You are being paid to ruin lives. Quit the job! Stop ruining lives of young minds who have the tendency to be great in what you would/have made them hate. Many of my students decided to stay in science because I taught them with LOVE yet discipline and not FEAR.

Bro. D began to spread rumors of me being bewitched by the Proprietress and called for prayers o. I was unhappy with him but I did not stop him because I recall, I told him, “if you think I am doing the wrong thing, please pray for me.” But when I got to know the truth behind the whole matter. I felt betrayed by a brother. He is not just a brother in church, I see him as a blood brother, the more reason I could not stomach it, so I confronted him and the rest was history. That scenerio made me only to trust myself, me and I. I found it difficult to trust people fully afterwards though I still try but am always expectant that one day, you will fall my hand.

My kid sister took after me religious-wise and I do fear for her because she is just deep neck into churchism and I hope it will lead her to the truth but the question is, would she be able to break away. Anyway, I will be closely monitoring her to lend a hand if she so desire.[/b]

The Bible itself warns severally not to put our trust in man.

dankol:

3. A few more events shooked my faith terribly but I still stood my ground. I will narrate them one after the other but not necessarily sequentially.

There was this pastor, ok,let me call him brother F, cos he is no longer a pastor. because not up to one month of assumption as a pastor of my local assembly, he was removed. Why? Because he is said to be involved with two women. At first, when i got to know, it was likea joke, but it dawn on me. I had to make enquiry on why the church will have to take such unchristian decision. yes it is unchristian because, everyone has a past that we do not like to remember. But the church had to use brother F's past as a yardstick to prevent him from serving as a Pastor.

Every church has their style of administration and structure just like any sane establishment or ORGANIZation.

What was his offence? Brother F was a committed member of a very popular holiness church before he join us but he left because he was decieved and was trapped into a marriage with a mentally unstable lady. I will not like to discuss the modus operandi of the church with respect to marriage but by the time brother F realize his folly about "GOD'S WILL", it was too late. he got to know of his wife's predicament at the delievery of his son when the lady in question began to misbehave and almost killed herself and the child at birth. He was so angry that, he had to leave the church because he was betrayed by the same people he trust with his life called "Pastor or Men of God". he found out that, it was an arranged marriage as the parents of the lady were very influencial in church and the lady was due to be sent off, so they had to collide with the MOG to look for a gulible suitor to wed her off. Infact, according to him, the sham marriage was 80% financed by the bride's family. So after that event, he left the church but along the line, he found another lady all by himself devoid of any external influence, impregnanted her, and brought her into his house. He did not pay her dowry untill after two kids from the new wife. LOL, i no blame the man. Once beaten, twice shy.

You judged based on a one sided story, i am sure the other side would have their own story to tell. i am sure the man must have told his church that the woman was the will of God for his life, he had prayed, seen vision, blabla and was prepared to be with the woman in sickness and pain until death. He made the vow rashly, whose fault?

He was told to restitute, i.e. go back tohis first wife and leave the second one. Hevehemently refused. I was shocked to hear about that kind of restitution. it is one of the dumbest thing i have heard. Restitute oyour marriage. I came to realize, the church so much believe in restitution that they are blind to certain facts about it and it implication on the christian faith. That there are things that CANNOT be practically restituted. How can a rapist restitute?
How can an assasin restitute?
Mind you, we need to know what restitution means- To restore to initial, or original manner or to it proper owner.
So how do you restore a dead man back? i.e for an assasin to effective restitute his ways. Please don't tell me that story of him going to the family of the person he killed and ask for forgiveness. That is actually sucide mission in disguise.

There are things that can be restituted and there are things that cant be restitutedin the actual sense of the word.

So, i began to ask, if i have to restitute for all my wrong doings, then what is the purpose of knowing jesus? Why did he die?
If i still have to restore/compensate for my wrongs? Mind you, he died to cleanse me from my sins including the ones i ought to restitute, so if i restitute, i got no sin for him to cleanse me from

And if this dogma of restitution is true, seriously, noone is going to be as near as a 100km close to heaven (if such a place exist). becasue, frankly, you cant remeber all your wrong doings, neither can you restitute for all of them. it is an unrealistic dogma.

So, on that basis, he was condemned by the church to be unfit to preside over a church.Because it is a church dogma. Mind you, the child from the first marriage is with himand his new family. That incidence almost made him lost his faith but he kept on anyway but never active since then till date. I did felt bad about it. it was an unfair judgement on an elect of God from my point of view.

[/b]

Restitution simply means making wrongs right, and having a conscience VOID of offence before God and men. Wisdom is important in carrying out restitution. You lack a proper knowledge of what restitution entails.

dankol:
[b]CHAPTER THIRTEEN CONTINUED

The church I attend is a very orderly church in terms of hierarchy and in fact some posts, to me seems unnecessary. For instance, some person’s duty is to go round local churches to drum church dogma/doctrine into people’s ears, another has the duty to go around and do revivals. Whatever! One day, we were told in church to convene at the State headquarters to attend one of these Revival. The revivalist goes from state to state to perform his divine duty as prescribed by the church. So it was our turn to be visited. Well, as usual, the donation/Seed sowing bell will never stop ringing with massive response from brain-washed individuals. I am someone who hates to go to an event late, I would rather not go than be late.

So, at the place of Revival, when this man entered the church, he walked in majestically to the sit, knelt down to pray, stood up, went up to the alter to collect the microphone. He said, with anger in his voice, “Why is the church scanty like this, are they not aware of my coming. Pastor! did you inform your subordinate pastors?”. The pastor replied in affirmative. The revivalist began to preach. He is more like a critic anyway. He criticized everything that was done, and that publicity was not enough for the program. That one no enter me o. Until, he began to verbally attack people. Now he was also one of the pioneering pastors of a local church in that town. And was so lucky to have risen far above others.

So he was not happy with the state of things knowing how he left things and now that he feels things get worse. He was calling names, he would say, “Dagunro (pardon, its an example oo not real names)! Stand up, come here, you did not see me when I entered right, why did you not come to collect my bible? You are a bastard son in Christ! I was the one that made you a minister, look at how ungrateful you are.” And several other persons were being bashed, and he would narrate how he helped them and ask them to sit in front sit where he can see them. But the most painful one that got me angry and so mad inside of me was a woman. This woman is one of the gentlest persons I have ever met on earth. Her children all grown up like me, were my friends. But she was so unlucky that day. What happened?

She came in while the revivalist was pouring his venom on some dude. When he raised his eyes, he just summoned her, “Come here, Dairo! Everyone see another bastard in Christ. So you have the guts to come to a program am involved late ehe. Where is your stupid husband? I was the one who would shelter you, take you to the hospital when he would beat you to pulp. I paid some of your children’s fees. You, Ingrate. I thought you should have been a Senior Pastor by now. But it is obvious since I left, You all have been stagnant in the faith. Dairo! yours is the most painful, come here” Even Pastor C, was not left out in the bashing oooo. He asked her to wait on him by the pulpit. She stood there till he finished his message. She was crying profusely. I have never in my life see a woman broken like that. At a point, he threaten to beat her with his belt as he tried to remove it. (I know many of you will not believe this part of the story but it is the truth. So many others have seen worse). Her case was so painful because, her children were there watching her being treated that way. OVER MY DEAD BODY. I can never let it happen to a relative, how much more my mother. I will beat that pastor to a pulp and take myself to the police station. Even if you are the Vicar of Jesus.[/b]

Obviously, such a revivalist is not a biblical Christian, you don't even need Holy Ghost to know this. None of this makes one to lose faith in God if one knows God.

Cool story. However you LIED when you said you did pre-degree in UI. I'm a UI student so I'll know

blessedvisky:
Cool story. However you LIED when you said you did pre-degree in UI. I'm a UI student so I'll know

Really, well, i guess since you have concluded. I leave you to your imaginations. thanks for the comment anyway

[b]CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CONTINUE

Jamb came, I wrote it with anger and it was the highest I ever had. I was glad because, the course I wanted to do was hefty. So, it required a serious jamb score to stand a chance sef. Mind you, it is only U.I, Unilag and two private universities that is offering that course in the whole of south west. I recall an incident that occurred to my dad, he was telling someone about my choice of course and sought the advice of the person to know if stood a chance especially with my choice of school in the South South. The person laughed him to scorn that, I can’t be given admission in that course because it is a course for only influential people and we know nobody. But today, My dad laughed last.

When the admission came, the news was broken to the scorner. I could not describe the shock on his face. My dear reader! Do not give up on your dreams. What is keeping you away from it is simply TIME. And if you are persistent, focused and patient. You will get there. If you are a Christian, get this song by Donnie Mcklurkins “YES! YOU CAN”. It is soul-lifting and inspirational. You can download it too online. The point is, do not give up on yourself (Dream).

But before, I got admission, this happened to me:
I was still teaching but bulk of the money was going to my sister’s school fees. So I barely have enough to feed how much more save. XXXXXXXX Post-Utme form came out. I got no money to obtain it. Also, my second choice, OAU was also out. I had to do something real quick. I went to my pastor (A newly promoted fella this time, but we have been together in that church for a long time), to request for help. I just wanted a loan of 10k after which I would refund. He told me point blank, the church had no money to lend but he could give me just 1k to support myself. I sat down on that sit, remembering, how I rejected an 8k job for the church.

I know I would not need to come for help if I had taken that job and also how I rejected an opportunity to get paid as a vocalist for another church that wanted to lure me away from the one I attended. Now! I am in dire need. This man here is talking about 1k. I stood up, thanked him and left. That night, I began to think of the options I have; I had the option of going to Edo state to clear farms and get money but meaning I have to leave my teaching job. No! these children needs me. Ok, the only other option for me was to join a Steel company to work night shift to earn 0.7k per day. That, I did. Those who have worked in a steel company or are working there will understand my plight especially when you are new to the job. I worked at the furnance, Casting and one other section I can’t recall anymore. But, the point I want to bring out of it is, that work no be work! it is a death trap! But the cash is what make people do it. 0.7k per day x 7= 4.9k per week and almost 20k per month. In this part of the country, you are a big boy. Every week, there is always a casualty. I recall I was almost one.

My group were sent to get oxy-acetylene gas used by the casting foremen to cut the cast. We loaded ourselves into a tractor-like vehicle to load the gas cylinders. Now, the motorable track, above it, is this magnetic picker that is using electricity. It is used to pick the hot casts and transferred to the next section. Na so we dey drive our tractor loaded with gas come under the stuff. It was carrying some cast. Suddenly, Electric power went off and behold, the casts were demagnetized from the magnetic picker and we were under it as the casts fell right immediately behind us. If it had fallen on the tractor, possibly on the gas, I would not be here to tell the story. But because of 0.7k, I almost lost my life.
[/b]

[b]CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CONTINUATION......
I did not stop teaching, I would teach during the day, and go to the other work at night. It was not funny. It was the cash that gave me strength. I began to have money to take care of myself and siblings. I bought provisions and food stuff. I had already sent money to get the PUME and I was saving for the journey to South South.

OAU pume came, I went to write, I had 198. I knew that was the end of the road for that, but seriously, my mind was not there. XXXXXX came calling for PUME, I took excuse from my boss, the proprietress. She permitted me. Infact she has been following me up since I wrote jamb, trying to know the latest. Well, not really because she care about me, but her business. She needed to know how to get a replacement for me. She did it in good faith though. All these while, I only go to church on Sundays now and now an ordinary member because, I could not attend rehearsals anymore because of the double-decker work I was doing. The local church was on my neck to come back and that they will do something about my issue. I told pastor that day, it is too late. You can’t give me as much as I earn. Moreover, it is going to come in the form of help and I will be answerable to the church. I rejected it.

Now, I know a lot of questions will pop up in the reader’s mind about my dad’s role in this? My dad lost his job long before now and was greatly handicapped to do his duties as a father. It was not his intention to let me or any of us go through what we went through. Mind you we were Nine of us, from both wives. One of the reasons, why I will have a minimum of one and maximum of two children so I can take care of them. I do really pity my old man. The burden was much.

Two days to my departure to no man’s land for pume. My assistant Pastor called me to his house to tell me about one vision he had about me. I can’t recall how he narrated his fake vision but the bottom line was that, I should not go else it will spell doom for me and my siblings. Now, this assistant pastor of a man, I respect him also and infact, he has been a major encouragement to my Christian life. I learnt a lot from him especially being the Youth Pastor. He was loaded with words of encouragement and Power. Looking at his record, no taint or stain from my point of view. So, I believed him. Moreover, what are the chances of me getting admission over there and the money I would waste to go there. Na the money matter, pinch me pass.

So I cancelled my trip to XXXXXXX. I went back to work at the Steel company, day and night till the day of departure. My dad called me to know if am on the way. I told him, I am no longer going. He was shocked. I explained to him of my fears of not getting the admission and money, I do not have enough money. He told me to go that, he would send some money to me. Anyway, that is part of his trick sha . But I refuses oo. I told him, I am not interested again and I want to try THE POLYTECHNIC IBADAN- that was my poly choice.

That day, I knew I had a father who would do anything to help his boy get some sense, when I mean anything, nothing violent. My dad affirmed to me on the phone and said, “Dankol, I am on my knees, Please be on your way. I will go lend some money anywhere and send to you by Monday. Please, just start moving”. That gesture touched me and immediately, I went to my supervisor at the steel company to give me a permit to leave the company’s premises. He refused, I told him, I have to go whatever it takes. He said, I will lose my pay for the day. I agreed. So I left for XXXXXXX the next day. My dad did not rest from calling me until he was sure I got there and wrote the Exam. I told him not to worry about the money he promised to send but he insisted and sent me 2.5k to support myself.[/b]

dankol:
[b]CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CONTINUATION......
I did not stop teaching, I would teach during the day, and go to the other work at night. It was not funny. It was the cash that gave me strength. I began to have money to take care of myself and siblings. I bought provisions and food stuff. I had already sent money to get the PUME and I was saving for the journey to South South.

OAU pume came, I went to write, I had 198. I knew that was the end of the road for that, but seriously, my mind was not there. XXXXXX came calling for PUME, I took excuse from my boss, the proprietress. She permitted me. Infact she has been following me up since I wrote jamb, trying to know the latest. Well, not really because she care about me, but her business. She needed to know how to get a replacement for me. She did it in good faith though. All these while, I only go to church on Sundays now and now an ordinary member because, I could not attend rehearsals anymore because of the double-decker work I was doing. The local church was on my neck to come back and that they will do something about my issue. I told pastor that day, it is too late. You can’t give me as much as I earn. Moreover, it is going to come in the form of help and I will be answerable to the church. I rejected it.

Now, I know a lot of questions will pop up in the reader’s mind about my dad’s role in this? My dad lost his job long before now and was greatly handicapped to do his duties as a father. It was not his intention to let me or any of us go through what we went through. Mind you we were Nine of us, from both wives. One of the reasons, why I will have a minimum of one and maximum of two children so I can take care of them. I do really pity my old man. The burden was much.

Two days to my departure to no man’s land for pume. My assistant Pastor called me to his house to tell me about one vision he had about me. I can’t recall how he narrated his fake vision but the bottom line was that, I should not go else it will spell doom for me and my siblings. Now, this assistant pastor of a man, I respect him also and infact, he has been a major encouragement to my Christian life. I learnt a lot from him especially being the Youth Pastor. He was loaded with words of encouragement and Power. Looking at his record, no taint or stain from my point of view. So, I believed him. Moreover, what are the chances of me getting admission over there and the money I would waste to go there. Na the money matter, pinch me pass.

So I cancelled my trip to XXXXXXX. I went back to work at the Steel company, day and night till the day of departure. My dad called me to know if am on the way. I told him, I am no longer going. He was shocked. I explained to him of my fears of not getting the admission and money, I do not have enough money. He told me to go that, he would send some money to me. Anyway, that is part of his trick sha . But I refuses oo. I told him, I am not interested again and I want to try THE POLYTECHNIC IBADAN- that was my poly choice.

That day, I knew I had a father who would do anything to help his boy get some sense, when I mean anything, nothing violent. My dad affirmed to me on the phone and said, “Dankol, I am on my knees, Please be on your way. I will go lend some money anywhere and send to you by Monday. Please, just start moving”. That gesture touched me and immediately, I went to my supervisor at the steel company to give me a permit to leave the company’s premises. He refused, I told him, I have to go whatever it takes. He said, I will lose my pay for the day. I agreed. So I left for XXXXXXX the next day. My dad did not rest from calling me until he was sure I got there and wrote the Exam. I told him not to worry about the money he promised to send but he insisted and sent me 2.5k to support myself.[/b]

What a caring dad.

ur story is so touching.