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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) (56957 Views)
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Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Olaide59(f): 9:08pm On Sep 01, 2016 |
Han han! So fast?!
Nice story anyway |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by DannyJ19(m): 9:11pm On Sep 01, 2016 |
Shay dis story end abi Nepa take light..... |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by rachealfst(f): 11:18pm On Sep 01, 2016 |
Nice story, God bless you. Thanks for sharing. |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by FlordFlorez(m): 6:19am On Sep 02, 2016 |
No, no, no. It can't just end like that. Anybdy provoke u?? |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Daeveed(m): 8:09am On Sep 02, 2016 |
Kudos Bro... |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by aprilwise(m): 9:35am On Sep 02, 2016 |
The story finished earlier than I expected.nevertheless thanks very much. |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by holuwaxemixire: 5:55pm On Sep 02, 2016 |
Well done Boyo boy. |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Luckymay(f): 1:41am On Sep 08, 2016 |
Nice story boyo. But the way you ended it wasn't pleasing to me (I don't know about others) And the way you made everything seem so easy for funmi and dayo made the story seem so fake and unreal. I know it's imaginary fiction but there are ways you could have added some touch of realness in it. At first the suspense was captivating but at the end people's expectations were disappointed. For me, I was expecting things to happen that dayo and funmi weren't relatives after all, that way there won't be reason for the supposed "incest" relationship which is obviously the case judging by the way the story ended Not unless it's acceptable in the West. All in all, you did a nice job. I'm sure your next one would be better. Thanks for the ride through. |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Neroclassic(m): 12:09pm On Sep 09, 2016 |
Boyo123 never fails. Very nice write up. I think u should make this your talent more of profession than hobby because u r truly gifted. More grace to u. Remember to mention me in the next. Gracias |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by boyo123(m): 11:53pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
Luckymay:thanks for the comment Luckymay i appreciate it. but i want you to know that no matter how i end the story everyone cant be satisfied with it, and as you know, i like ending my stories in such a way that i leave room for continuation in case there is a need for it, And the way you made everything seem so easy for funmi and dayo made the story seem so fake and unreal wow, really hurts dear,i tried to make it as realistic as possible I was expecting things to happen that dayo and funmi weren't relatives after all, that way there won't be reason for the supposed "incest" relationship which is obviously the case judging by the way the story ended Not unless it's acceptable in the West. that was one of the main issue that brought about me writing this story but i still really appreciate your comment , thanks soooo much , God bless you 1 Like |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by boyo123(m): 8:33am On Sep 11, 2016 |
Neroclassic:thanks bro, have been looking for connection on that o, but not seeing anyone, |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Luckymay(f): 10:42am On Sep 11, 2016 |
boyo123:Sorry my Good friend, I wasn't trying to hurt your feelings. I'm sorry it I made my criticism sound hurtful. You are really doing a nice job, please don't let anyone, not even me deter you or discourage you. I still remain your no. 1 fan. Cheers!! 1 Like |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by benkazy1014(m): 2:53pm On Sep 12, 2016 |
Boyo nyc job, nid to wrk on ur typo and use of tense though. As for the end of the story, its ok, open to continuation while everybody has the liberty of writing his own happy/sad ending. Admin GIVE BOYO123 AN OSCAR!!! 1 Like |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by laikas: 8:54pm On Sep 13, 2016 |
nice story, buh me no lyk the way the story end o 1 Like |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by boyo123(m): 9:22am On Sep 24, 2016 |
benkazy1014:thanks bro, appreciate 1 Like |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by collins1895: 4:34pm On Sep 27, 2016 |
Short n intresting,Tanks boyo,i enjoyd it. 1 Like |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by boyo123(m): 9:59pm On Sep 28, 2016 |
collins1895:thanks bro |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Princezoi(m): 8:10am On Sep 29, 2016 |
boyo123:Bro i have tried contacting you, i really enjoy your stories here on Nairaland and i have a proposal for you. |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by boyo123(m): 2:39pm On Sep 29, 2016 |
Princezoi: thanks bro, i replied your mail, but i havent heard from you either |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Princezoi(m): 3:35pm On Sep 29, 2016 |
boyo123:I'm sorry i cant access that email for now, send me your email address and i'll fill you in. |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by boyo123(m): 4:18pm On Sep 29, 2016 |
Princezoi:ok bro, uthman.b123@gmail.com |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Princezoi(m): 5:38pm On Oct 03, 2016 |
boyo123:Bro i already sent you a mail to the address you sent, and i am yet to recieve a reply. Pls find time and reply as soon as possible. |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by boyo123(m): 9:18am On Oct 04, 2016 |
Princezoi:i have replied you |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by boyo123(m): 7:46am On Oct 20, 2016 |
number of views keep increasing but am not seeing comments, what is happening guys |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Precial419: 2:27pm On Nov 07, 2016 |
Hi nix write up. short and concise but u need to connect with your characters and d places u are using.am not so sure that incest is practiced in nigeria and espiecialy in yoruba, the relationship between dayo and funmi is a taboo. and then funmi seems to me to be a staunch village and so she would have being bothered about her losing virginity and d consequeses attached to it than love. pls connect with the characters and then dayo's father should still be worried about his son's education since dats d only one he had. you can as well increase d suspense . there are somethings u should not add immediately thanks 1 Like |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by boyo123(m): 3:01pm On Nov 07, 2016 |
Precial419:thanks for your observations madam but do you think if dayo knew funmi was he's cousin he would have slept with her? i hope you will agree with me that such can happn to anyone also i will disagree with you on the issue of funmi being a staunch village girl ,am sure you know that village girls are far easier to swindle when it comes to issue of sex, i hope u get what am saying, thanks for the comment ones again madam |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Precial419: 3:51pm On Nov 07, 2016 |
boyo123:Yes i get what u are but in a normal africa setting, the families would be more worried at d abomination committed than hatred since it could have led to their death a terrible but u made d hatred between them to surpass traditions unless u r choosing an advanced yoruba africa setting. even if it was jux sex, they have needed to go for cleansing. incest is a taboo in most of the world not to talk of the yorubas in nigeria they have one of d best and strict cultural practices and traditions in africa. |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Precial419: 3:53pm On Nov 07, 2016 |
Relationships between cousins are possible but it is still a taboo dats wat u ignored |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by boyo123(m): 5:40pm On Nov 07, 2016 |
Precial419:hmmm, madam u are going spiritual o |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Precial419: 6:51pm On Nov 07, 2016 |
boyo123:No am not spiritual that's why i said connect with the place-their culture and tradition. sori if it seems am going spiritual but this is not d first story i hav read about relatives getting married but the culture allowed them to. such a suggestion though it would make d story much more realistic |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by boyo123(m): 7:06pm On Nov 07, 2016 |
Precial419:thats why i ended it that way so there could be space for continuation the way it is now anyone can conclude the story the way he likes, for example u can imagine them going tru the spiritual bath and eventually leaving each other while someone else who is cool with the whole event might like see them marry each other my opinion as the writer is not stated yet, based on demands and maybe some other condition i can decide to reveal my opinion thanks again, pls dont forget to check my other stories on my profile , would love to see your reviews on them too |
Re: Fate And Fortune(a Short Story) by Precial419: 8:13pm On Nov 07, 2016 |
boyo123:K thanks i undastand and how do i check ur stories cos i got to know about d literature section about 4 days ago |
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