The next day at mum's shop, the place was busy as usual. A few wealthy people that trooped in for purchases. Have always wondered how mum made much customers within the short time she had stayed there but a quick perusal at her shop will tell you why. She runs one of the most expensive stores in the neighborhood. All the goods displayed cost fortunes.

There was Mr Ade who was highly known for his political ambitions. His purchases totaled about five hundred thousand naira. I watched in awe as the sales girl packed the little items for him. Next to him on queue was Mrs Samson, and then an older man dressed in well-patched tweed. Also a plump woman in a high necked black wool gown, complete with a round , black collar- the kind of uniform that shouted that she was in office. Half the customers had the look of working people. As I was watching the bustling activities going on in the shop, I didn't notice Ben was standing right in front of me.

Ben was a guy that admired me immensely. He has done everything within his power to get my attention but I've always shushed him. Ben was huge and broad muscled. He works with an oil and gas industry. I learnt he studied mechanical engineering and he was one of the few intelligent guys I've met. He was what every girl would refer to as drop-dead gorgeous. There were few times i admired him back but why i couldn't grant him the desire of dating me was incomprehensible even to me. Maybe because he doesn't make my belly flutter whenever he was close to me or had he ever made me want to catch my breath?

There was a day he stopped my sister to get my contact and that was the last time he ever spoke with my sister. He wouldn't dare step an inch closer to her again, not after the hostile and rude behavior she showered him with. I, unlike my sister can pretend to like you even when I don't. It necessarily doesn't mean I'm giving green light and also pulling back, its called been refined enough to say NO in a polite manner.

Ben never gave up. He continued to be the ever charming and nice guy despite the odds. He still kept his hopes high that I will eventually find out the kind of guy he was and date him. That morning, as I turned to face him, he wore a charming smile. A smile that says " one day, you will realize that I'm the right guy for you".

"Good morning Ben", my smile peeked to match his.

"How are you Lisa?",he asked with an intent gaze cast upon my face. His voice was clear but so quiet.

"I'm very good, thank you", I echoed.

"I happen to be passing by and thought it rude not to say hi", he told me.


He left when we were done with our little conversation. As soon as he left, my phone beeped and guess who called? Your guess is correct. It was Richmond. With so much enthusiasm, i picked up. , I greeted him with clenched teeth in order not to reveal how excited I was hearing from him. We talked for so long on the phone. The conversation kept heading to several directions. As his coarse voice sounded at the other end, my mind went back to the dream I had last night. All I could see was his hands fumbling my small sized breasts, I thought of his cute lips on them, I recalled how his mouth covered my clitoris in that dream. My left middle finger carelessly dropped on my lips and the hot kiss that night out came washing down on me.


"Are you still there?", his voice thundered from the other end of the line.

I jumped. Geez! I was carried away with the sensual thoughts that I didn't know when I drifted off from the conversation. Then i discovered that i did have very few choices when it comes to things concerning him. I wanted to forget all that happened in the dream, i tried to erase the lingering kiss from my mind but the sound of his husky voice made the memory return unbidden, waiting on the surface of my skin, reviving with every breath that passed through my lips. As I jerked back to reality, I noticed he was asking if I would love to visit his house. I didn't give affirmation to the idea at first but if my dream was to come true, then i'd better visit his place i told myself. So i consented to the visitation idea. He was to pick me from my house by 6:00 p.m. that same day.

I came outside as soon as i heard his horn boom. I was very casual with my outfit. A plain top that told much of my little bosom and jeans to go with it. As I approach the front stairs, I noticed he was already out from his car. He'd worn darker, rougher clothing for this outing - trousers of gray wool and a matching polo which hugged tightly on his chest exposing charming physique. Around his neck was a shiny gold necklace hanging loosely on it. His garb made him look like some towheaded scoundrel, roguish and maybe a little wicked. The kind of man who'd tempt a girl to walk outside with him at night. It would be all too easy to become tipsy around him.


"Good evening", I muttered as if I was talking to myself.

You wouldn't blame me. I was taken aback by the way his muscles were flexing through his polo in a seductive manner.

He smiled wickedly, only if he had an idea what his smiles were doing to my insides. As we held hands and protruded to his car, I felt something drop on my left shoulder. As I looked to know what it could be, I discovered it was a poop from a bird.

"Ewwww" , I gasped.

I intentionally wore this particular top because it was one of the few ones that shows off my small sized boobs. It actually made them appear bigger. Immediately, I dreaded the horrible thought of going back to change into another one. Before I realize what was happening, Richie rushed to a nearby pump, soaked his handkerchief in water and started working towards removing the poop from my top. His fingers trailed in circular motion, the mess wasn't too much. Matter of fact, it didn't take him 3 seconds to clear it off. The 3 seconds felt like forever, I shut my eyes as he worked his way on my shoulder. I sucked in my breath. That tiny bit of closeness was doing something I couldn't possibly describe to myself.

He looked at the damp on his kerchief and tartly threw it in the trash can nearby. In a gentlemanly stride, he held out the door for me as I snuggle up on the car seat as if it was a normal sitting couch. He set his two hands on the steering and zoomed off. There was something about him that draws my eye. Something that defies words. Maybe it was the cautious manner with which he does things? Nope, that would be self deceit. It has to be something in his looks. Maybe it was his luscious looking lips, or was it the unique faint scar on his face? Or probably his charming yet daring eyes?


"How can you be so beautiful?", he asked through prying eyes, still trying to focus on his driving.

"Huh?", that was the only thing that escaped my lips.

"You're so beautiful and I really wish to be so alone with you", he whispered.

Now how was I suppose to take such words from a man I was highly attracted to. I couldn't sunk that in as I vehemently wished we were already alone. I so craved to be alone with him in his apartment that no other thing mattered to me. I was so sure our feelings were trying to overmatch each other that I was left speechless. In what seemed like an eternity, we continued the drive to his house. By now, you already know the kind of crazy things going through my mind. Utterly crazy thoughts. And nope, I never wanted to restrain myself from such thoughts. My desire to wallow in them was strong.

As we entered his apartment, there wasn't much time to have a look at the surroundings. The door was shut in a sound I could only describe as thunderous before Richie leapt on me. He tugged behind me to bring me much closer to him. The proximity was over-killing, I looked up to him, he returned the gaze before his lips covered mine. He made a soft exhalation. His lips were warm on mine , but then it became ravaging, like he wanted to bite off my lips or something. This was demanding, overwhelming kind of loving. And my body craved more.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, my hands diving into his the surprisingly hardness of his head. My fingers were actually pushing his head towards mine,afraid he might change his mind and stop. I cared less at the very moment. I needed this as much as I need water to quench a thirst. His lips were not just pressed to my mouth but it was moving, coaxing, delving everywhere it could. His hands came to down to my bum. He held them tightly before he began to work magic on them. He fumbled as if he was trying to squeeze out juice from an orange.


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Part 5




By the time I turned off my light that night and slipped between my covers, all the emotion of the day had passed from me. I felt as if I was standing in the aftermath of a wildfire and burned as far as the eye could see. I almost smell the smoke, could feel the hidden embers inside me that had not yet burned to cold ash.


"Don't fall in love with him, Lisa", I warned myself. But the room was dark and my bed-sheets had not yet warmed me from my body heat.

If only he'd be less handsome, less intelligent. An ugly dude, a nonentity, a bookseller or someone else with that keen mind, those piercing eyes, that brilliant smile that seemed to be made for me alone. Instead he was gorgeous, he could have his pick of thousands of women. He could probably be passing the cold night with a call girl. The thought should have disgusted me but for some reason I imagined Richie - no, I had to think of him as a man. I imagined his gaze settling on some girls with beautiful shape and a larger -than-usual bosom.

"Her", he would say. "I want her tonight".

Stupid, very stupid of me to imagine that his desire, whatever inkling of it would persist long enough for him to purchase a substitute. I berated myself for that but still couldn't get the notion off my head.

He might be in bed with me at this very moment,. His hands would brush my breasts, like so. His lips would find not the palm of my hand, but my neck, my lips. There won't be hesitation, no interruption from my sister or just anybody. No holding back. There would be nothing but his rock-hard want.

His body would cover mine, and I would surrender to him. I would spread my legs, wrapping them around him. Those thoughts were enough to warm my bed, but once I started the imagery, I could not shut it off. It was my fingers between my legs, my own hand against my nipple. But I imagined him wanting me as much as I want him, taking me in my imagination the way I could never allow in real life. He plunged into me, hard; i shook as I brought myself to the brink. And when I came, biting my lip to keep myself from screaming, it was his face that I saw.

The bed was too hot for that, so hot that I threw back the blanket and let the cold air wash over me, honing my nipples to hard points once more. But the cold didn't bring the clarity I desperately needed.

I stood, crossed the room to the bathhouse and poured water from the tap. I splashed it across my face, the water was cold it brought shivers down my spine.

Maybe he had picked a woman tonight who looked exactly like me. Maybe he hadn't picked any woman but had went back to his empty flat and done to himself what I did to myself. The thought left me with a deep wistfulness.

If only...
"There are no its", I told myself sharply. This was reality that I had to accept. What had just happened in his house was the closest I'd come to making love with him. My throat tightened with yearning.

It doesn't matter.

I had learned long ago that my own emotions never mattered in some situation. Things are the way they are and would probably remain the same no matter how I felt about them. And this particular emotion, I really don't know how to deal with it. This one had sent me reeling far enough.

Still I fumbled with the bed-sheets, on other nights, I would have pulled them over and snuggled up to my teddy and dozed off but tonight, for the space time it took my heartbeat to return to normal, I sat on my bed and watched my fingers as if I was looking for some kind answer to all my troubles. I sat there until the clouds covered the moon and cut out all the light.

It was Saturday morning and there was the usual clean up. I was ransacking my room looking for where I carelessly dropped the last hair extension my mum gave to me. I needed to fix it because I've carried my natural hair for a while. It was high time I did something nice to change my look.

I was still on the verge of finding the human hair when my sister entered my room for petty amebo gist.



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Part 6



I have applied for the job of an Accountant in various establishments and for some viable months, I haven't received a call from any of them. Finding employment in a harsh and dwindling economy has never been an easy thing time immemorial. Most people have given up on paid jobs and had resorted to becoming entrepreneurs, giving orders on how their businesses should be run and are doing tremendously well. It wasn't as if I can't create a business of my own but there were certain factors to be considered. I needed a lot of funds to establish the kind of thing I had in mind, there's no one to inform me that a lot of money would be involved, hence the continuous quest for a paid job. If I was able to work for three years, I would definitely save up much for my venture I told myself.


I was in my father's study screening on the books that laid on the desk, I stumbled upon a book on how to properly construct a CV . At first I was flummoxed, I wondered why my father could keep such books and won't say anything about it. I simply rubbed my hands together in glee and bounced on the one that caught my attention. I told myself it might be my sister's and at such, should be in her possession. My dad should be talking retirement not how to write a good CV , I muttered to myself. I looked at the window, shifted the blinds and cast my gaze down from the vantage. I saw the market square as the market wasn't situated far from my house. There were people walking about, those pricing for wares making sounds that can be hardly heard. None could be heard, their voices more like a rumble, the tumultuous yelling and rants emanated from vehicles and passengers moving on the busy road.

I sat down and began to flip through the pages with all seriousness. Maybe there were steps I hadn't taken to properly write my CV. I came across career objectives and pinched myself. Have I ever taken out time to include that on my CV? I hadn't the slightest idea that it was one of the things that makes a good CV, with ardent interest, I pinned it down on a rough paper I saw lying carelessly on the ground. I paused and meditated for over 10 minutes on what my career objectives were. As I continued , I realised I never included my strengths but I sure went on to rant on how superb my writing skill was. But of course, I have always prided myself in my writing capabilities. I once thought I would have gone for English and literary studies in the university instead of Accounting.

Not necessarily saying Accounting was bad for me, nope. But I know It would have been better if I've followed my passion. My dad couldn't hear of it when he learnt I wanted to study English.

"Your mates are vying for the professional courses that will provide immediate employment and you are talking literary studies. its a nice course , don't misunderstand me Lisa, but they are good outside Nigeria. No child of mine will end up as a teacher", the old man had said.

We dashed him that title not because he was too old, but because we loved calling him that and he seemed to like it. In fact, he smiles like a kid given sweets anytime we call him that.

As I was still going through the book, a call came from Ben. It was a strange number and I didn't know it was him until he disclosed his identity. How he finally got my contact was unexplainable. I know I didn't give it to him, he couldn't have possibly gotten it from my sister who has never liked him. She would have given him a sullen look and walked away. She could tweak a man to the verge of annoyance and beyond. Though she can't be regarded as thoughtless, callous or cruel but She acts mean anytime the devil in her alerts her to. Talking about my number to Ben, I can vouch he didn't get it from her. I picked up .

"Hello, Ngene Olivia on the line, please how may I help you"?, I answered formally like one in a customer care job interview.

"Its Ben", came his voice from other end.

After the normal midday greetings, my curiosity took the better part of me and I queried him on how he got my digits.

"Please, I do not mean to be rude but I can't remember giving you my number", I said expecting a reasonable reply.

How this guy maneuvered and avoided the answer was story for another day. I calmed my nerves and carried on with conversation. To my utmost surprise, it wasn't a boring one. I'd already seen him as someone who wouldn't make a good conversationalist but he literally put me to doubt. We drifted from one topic to another. We talked about his favorite cartoon character. I found out we had somethings in common. We love the same dish (beans and plantain), we love same football club (Manchester United), we love shrek. My interest in him piqued a notch at the end of the phone call and we decided to have dinner at his favorite resort.

I declined his coming to pick me up. I preferred coming down myself. At first, I thought he would push it but he didn't. He politely told me "it was all about me" and that we can only play by my rules. There was something I noticed about him, it was true I wasn't attracted to him, he didn't make my belly flutter, he was no where as charming as Richmond but I was completely comfortable and serene around him. It seemed as though everything about him thrives in tranquility and harmony.

Richie called later but it was to check on me. That has always been an anthem for him. His caring attitude that amazed me seemed to be what he just enjoyed doing. It wasn't like I don't call to check on him but his, surpasses mine. We haven't been together after the sizzling incident that happened in his house. For over 2 weeks, we both minded our businesses and kept everything cool via phone conversations. I needed the time to decipher what I literally want for myself and know how to fix my wanton desire and lust into the whole drama going on.

My night out with Ben ended in disaster or so I thought. I'd always looked for a flimsy excuse, the slightest thing that will make me label him a bad man and I got one at the end of the outing.




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