''Revenge is the sweetest thing next to having p^ssy'' - 2pac.


People,you are about to peer into the past of thebachelor.

Before we begin,please take note that thebachelor is not the op. We are different,l'm the truth and thebachelor is the fiction.

Thank you.

Is that all?

nma24:
Is that all?

The story's to follow next naw.. So,Aunty,take a Chill pill with a cold bottle of Orijin.

Oya keep spilling

Before Maria(the Karashika that turned me into a gamophobe),there were others.
Actually,many others.

Growing up,before he got admitted into the university of Jos,thebachelor stumbled onto a Socrates quote,''man know thyself''.

He went on a soul searching and discovered that no woman was good enough for him. To put it appropriately,he's too good for just one woman.

Who will blame him? He thicks all the boxes for the vain young women. He was tall,dark and handsome. With a little cash to buy some nice clothes.

Good looks,good dress sense and a pretty okay IQ. Thebachelor was a killer. Still killing though. ''smiles''.

:-XThis your story get as e be

Ozavize88:
:-XThis your story get as e be

fine eyes.

As a fresher,when l resumed,pop gave me so much money that lying to get extra wasn't necessary.
After all the necessities were taken care of,the rest went on booze,clothes and miscellaneous.

I was a fresh fresher,always looked sharp. The females noticed me,the gangs too... And they gossip. I was toasted,but that's a gist for another day.

I had my standard,though. So not every Jumoke,Nkiru or Bilkisu that liked me had some. Though l gave cheerfully,l was stingy if you fell below my standard.
Tall(at least for a woman),pretty(beautiful was an added advantage),sexy looking(very essential),and most importantly she had to be understanding.

I put a premium on understanding.
She must understand that like buhari - l belong to everygirl and l belong to no girl.
That the fastest way to send me to a beer parlour was to nag whenever l was around her.
She must understand that unnecessary demands turned me off.
If she understood just these, any short coming in other criteria may be forgiven.

Most of the girls understood that and we were all fine. A few refused to understand,but there weren't a problem.

MrWhaley:

The story's to follow next naw.. So,Aunty,take a Chill pill with a cold bottle of Orijin.

yea yea

In Nigeria,we call it love at first sight but in Sicily,it is called ''thunderbolt''.

It is that moment when a man sees a lady for the first time and momentarily loses all his senses.

I was in my 2nd semester of my first year when l first saw Nonye. Standing at the entrance of the school building at permanent site,l sighted Nonye running towards the building from about 100metres out.

The rain had started pouring down heavily,and except she has the speed of Usain Bolt she was guaranteed some wetness.

Till this day l'm still trying to figure what pushed me to do the next thing l did,whether it was stupidity or it was love. But l remember seizing a gentleman's umbrella,jumped into the rain,charged towards her like a prince charming on a mission to rescue his cinderella from a deadly storm.

''l can't let an angel drench'',l said when l intercepted her.
She quickly hid under the umbrella and said ''thank you''.

Her voice felt like magic. I put my right arm around her shoulder and held up the umbrella with my left. This was the best moment of my life,second only to the day Nonye let me have it - and that took quite a while.

I was so engrossed in the moment that l failed to notice that l had snatched that umbrella from the kingpin of one of the gangs. And that little stunt though,it gave me Nonye's heart in the long run,it caused me my admission.

okay, am I really following this?

Nonye was a tall and slender girl. She was very beautiful and sexy in a delicate ''non-shouty'' way. Small but attractive breasts. Round but not so big bum.

She spoke impeccable grammar. She was a 3rd year student of the department of English,and a 2:1 material.

But most importantly,she become the first girl to make my nights sleepless. I didnt understand what was happening to me then. I couldn't go a day without seeing her and other girls become more and more irrelevant.

Nonye and l became good friends,and then lovers. She was my first love as l was hers.

Meanwhile,on that day l scampered with that gentleman's umbrella,l didn't meet him at the spot when l returned.

I searched for him around school but didn't find him. I decided to leave the umbrella with security. Weeks passed,and l eventually forgot about the umbrella.

Until one blessed day,the youngman decided to reveal himself. I was seated at a cafe with Nonye somewhere in town when four youngmen walked into the place and sat about 3 tables away from us.

''do you remember l told you one cult boy has been disturbing me since my first year?'',she asked.
''yeah,l do.'' l replied.
''ok,that's him sitting over there with those guys. The one on cap''.

I took a sharp glance at him,and just shrugged,''well,he can rest now cos you taken''. I said with a stint of pride.

About 10minutes later,the guy on cap walked to our table and sat on one of the chairs.
He gave Nonye a chilling smile,then turned to me and say,''so you stole my umbrella and also stole my girl''.
There was something ironic in that statement.
Even Nonye widened her eyes in amusement when she heard it.
So l had taken my rival's umbrella that day to go get a girl he's been wooing for three years.

As if we both thought the same thing,Nonye and l burst out laughing.
Our guest didn't see the humour though.

''l'm sorry man'',l said. ''the umbrella is with security,l'd get it for you. How do l find you?''.

He told me where to find him and asked me to bring his umbrella there the next day by 8pm. I mustn't fail.
I told him l don't know the place but l will figure it out and l'd prefer to come earlier.

Then he stood up and left.

Feeling sleepy already

op come and finish it

hmnnn

McBrooklyn:
Point of correction, "He married and fûcked yo bîtch cos you were broke and now they both got served"






But seriously OP, which baba do the jazz for you cos E get one babe for Nairaland wey ah wan use am on top too

Your signature though

Oya tell us more...

Thebachelor:

fine eyes.

thanks

Ozavize88:
:-XThis your story get as e be

Thebachelor:

fine eyes.

She's an ebira girl. That's how we roll

Jay542:
She's an ebira girl. That's how we roll

hey boss...long time

Wey the remaining op abi u wan make we ban you

Now I am following
If you say anything bad about Nonye, I will help you change the name

makydebbie:
hey boss...long time

Miss Debbie. Yea it's been a while. But we still read your diary sha . And I know your mum is doing wonderfully well now . How's GH?

Jay542:

Miss Debbie. Yea it's been a while. But we still read your diary sha . And I know your mum is doing wonderfully well now . How's GH?

GH is cool..mum is coming along.. na laziness dey do me

ButterFrost212:
Your signature though

Wetin do am though??

makydebbie:
GH is cool..mum is coming along.. na laziness dey do me

Na laziness dey always do you .