How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up - Family - Nairaland
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She Said She Was Raped, But See Why I Didn't Feel For Her / How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up / How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up (2) (3) (4)
| How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by JoyChinwe22(f): 7:17pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
THE ISSUE OF RAPE, WITHIN THE CONFINES OF MARRIAGE (how wives are being raped by husbands) Rape occurs when sexual intercourse or any other sexual activity is forced upon an individual without his/her consent. In marriage however, it is a form of domestic violence and sexual abuse, wherein sex is forced on one spouse by the other. As strange as it sounds, rape also occurs in marriage. Any sexual activity not consented by both parties, is rape. The prominent kind of rape in marriage however is wife rape. Rape generally is perceived not to be present in marriage, being that a woman is supposed to consensually engage in sex with her husband, making rape unnecessary. This is why despite the fact that rape in marriage has become quite rampant, it is given little or no attention from Human right activists', Criminal Justice System and even the society at large. Infact, wife rape remains one of the prevalent, yet under-reported crimes in Nigeria. Two of the best studies so far which have investigated the general existence of wife rape in representative samples of women ( Finkelhor & Yllo, 1985; Russell, 1990) have found that between 10-14% of women who have ever been married have been raped at least once by their partner. For the purpose of this article, we shall examine some of the intriguing issues and questions surrounding wife rape which include : Reasons men rape their wives, Why Victims refuse to report such incidents, The characteristics of wife rapists, The effects of wife rape on the victim( physically and psychologically) & on the home; and finally, What to do in case you experience such. WHY DO MEN RAPE THEIR WIVES? This is one of the nagging questions concerning wife rape which has been given several conflicting answers. However some of the prominent reasons given for wife rape include: To see more, visit: HOW WIFE’S ARE BEING RAPED BY HUSBANDS. http://www.familyflex.net/2016/09/how-wifes-are-being-raped-by-husbands.html 2 Likes |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by madridguy(m): 7:26pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
Funny write up. 3 Likes |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by Ranchhoddas: 7:27pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
What if the husband is the 'victim' of the 'rape'? 6 Likes |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by freesinzu(m): 7:44pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
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| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by menxer: 7:44pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
Is it only rape? What of emotional blackmail? What of emotional hostage taking? What of inordinate role reversal? There are crimes in marriage relationships that law books have no definition. 5 Likes |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by Drdreyy: 7:53pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
All this ladies/women that have been genitally mutilated are the ones complaining. Their husbands hardly enjoy them because they hate sex, it's usually painful for them. they don't even have urge for it. And each time the husband does it, they are just there, lying down like a log of wood., waiting for the man to finish the Nonsense and get up. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by JoyChinwe22(f): 8:45pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
Drdreyy:Not true, other women complain too, but they can only tell a few people because according to the society, 'there is nothing like rape in marriage', but it's a fat lie. 5 Likes |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by Drdreyy: 8:58pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
JoyChinwe22: Who told you it's a lie? do you want to dispute medical facts? Do you think i made that comment without any backup? Young woman, that's the fact. Believe it or not. The "others" you are referring to, constitute an infinitesimal/insignificant percentage of un-circumcised/NOT genitally mutilated women that complain, compared with a large percentage of genitally mutilated women that complain. 1 Like |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by JoyChinwe22(f): 10:15pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
Drdreyy:Wait? Do u know what u are saying? That only circumsized women complain about sex? Are u saying it is ok to force a woman to sleep with u if she is not circumsized and she won't complain? Do u even understand what u are saying?? 4 Likes |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by SAMBARRY: 10:26pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
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| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by Drdreyy: 10:38pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
JoyChinwe22: Force a woman to sleep with me? What type of rubbish are you vomiting? This topic deals with married couples so which woman are you talking about? Or you meant to say "wife"? I can't force my wife or any other woman for that matter for sex. And Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying it's only circumcised women that complain. Read my comment again and pay close attention to the percentage |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by JoyChinwe22(f): 10:42pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
Drdreyy:by woman..i mean wife. Wat u said implied that only circumsized women complain....but that's not true |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by nnamdibig(m): 10:49pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
Wife Rape? What's that? You accepted to spend the rest of your life with him, you proclaimed before everyone that both of you are one and you come here and talk of wife rape? Apart from maybe new couple no man ask for sex everyday from the wife. And so far it's not on daily basis, how will you explain having sex with your wife 3-4X in a week as rape? Please say something else |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by nnamdibig(m): 10:51pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
The complain I've heard is only if the John Thomas is not satisfying the wife or too big for her but not rape Biko |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by Drdreyy: 10:56pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
JoyChinwe22: I hate chatting or dragging words with women due to their comprehension capacity and data/information interpretation. You quoted the wrong context. I directed you to my 2nd comment and you went to quote the 1st comment. Na wa for you ooo. Anyway, i won't repeat myself, go through my second comment, the answer you seek is there. 3 Likes 1 Share
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| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by dasparrow: 11:19pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
Drdreyy: Alright. And whose fault is it that black Africans - Nigerians included - have such barbaric archaic traditional customs that mess up females' private parts and leave them sexually incapacitated for life? Who came up with the idea to cut off a girl's clitoriz so that she would not be promiscuous? was it not African men? Do you see Caucasian men inflict such harmful nonsense on their females? No they don't. It is only the backward African-bred male who sits there and comes up with ways to cause bodily harm on the females of his society. And then tomorrow, you people want to complain about your females being frigid in bed. Why won't they be frigid after you people have completely messed up their God-given varginas? Secondly, let's not even get started on the topic of pedophilia and how raping innocent little girls have also left them traumatized for life thereby causing them to hate sex as adults. Anyways, until you people change your barbaric and satanic ways all in the name of culture and tradition, expect more of these problems to arise. 10 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by Drdreyy: 11:51pm On Sep 14, 2016 |
dasparrow: You talk as if you are not an African. Well I don't think our fore fathers knew or had the foreknowledge that the practice will greatly affect a woman's sexual life or that her husband won't be able to enjoy her. If they knew it will eventually affect the husband, trust me they won't do it, you know it's men that make the rules. Even uptill this moment, some men still don't understand why most women hate sex or don't enjoy it. (mostly African women). And this is the reason why most African men are polygamous or unfaithful. Because their wives usually deny them. The reason why they usually do it is because of the fear that the female core (cl! t) may grow out of proportion and also to avoid promiscuity so that a woman will be able to keep her Virginity for her husband, since Virginity was of high value then. But it has a lot disadvantages, such as obstructed Labour, VVF, pain during intercourse/lack of interest etc..... Well, thank God for the federal government and WHO that are trying to put an end to the practice 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by njiasi30(f): 12:21am On Sep 15, 2016 |
Most times it happens when love is nt/ no longer dere. Probably, d man maltreats d wife and d wife will want to revenge by depriving him of sex or d man does nt satisfy her, she will just get tired and decide to retire  u know most men can't control d urge, so dey will end up forcing demself on dere wife and some will even beat her up/injure her in d process.D women always die in silence bc it's shameful to tell s/o ur Hus do rape/force u. I am strongly against dis act, men dat do it should pls stop, ur wife is nt a tool dat u treat anyhow or maybe u feel after all she's urs, u married her and all dat so she should always succumb..... Communication is d key and finding a lasting solution to dissolve issues.  2 Likes |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by cococandy(f): 3:20am On Sep 15, 2016 |
It doesn't matter how many times it is. Even if it's once a month. If you forced yourself against her wish, it's rape. nnamdibig: 7 Likes |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by cococandy(f): 3:23am On Sep 15, 2016 |
It's almost as if all African tradition/culture is based on ideologies that centered around stroking the men's egos and their sexual satisfaction. Nothing else mattered to them I suppose. dasparrow: 6 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by cococandy(f): 3:24am On Sep 15, 2016 |
And what exactly does that mean? That you're smarter than the average woman out there because you're a man? Not your fault. It all part of the sexist nonsense that has been bred into most of you. Drdreyy: 14 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by Nobody: 4:22am On Sep 15, 2016 |
Drdreyy: Lmaoooo men una fit take laff kill me ooo so women have subpar comprehension capacity? At least we are not the ones that go about killing and robbing innocent people and raping kids 6 Likes |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by Tyche(m): 4:28am On Sep 15, 2016 |
Are the words "wife" and "rape" compatible in the same sentence? |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by TheArchangel(f): 4:37am On Sep 15, 2016 |
Drdreyy:Ow aww. Coming for ya 2 Likes
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| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by nnamdibig(m): 5:28am On Sep 15, 2016 |
cococandy: Women!!!!!!! Even if it's once a month and you still say against her will? Hope you won't join her in calling the man a cheat when he starts looking at other options(that will probably be available daily) Both of them no date? For her to know how often the man wants sex? 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by nnamdibig(m): 5:29am On Sep 15, 2016 |
Tyche: |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by cococandy(f): 6:14am On Sep 15, 2016 |
You're not getting the point nnamdibig: |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by Berbierklaus(f): 7:50am On Sep 15, 2016 |
Drdreyy:And they continued with it,even till this 21st century? The world is fxcked up already,so keep the feminine blame game your forefathers drilled into y'all up. What an achievement |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by Drdreyy: 8:09am On Sep 15, 2016 |
Berbierklaus: You are not serious, so you couldn't see where i wrote that even upto today, some men still don't know why most women(African) hate sex and don't enjoy it hence deny their husband". It's only few educated men especially in the area of FGM that understand or know this. Most people that still practice it are unaware of its disadvantages. They still do it because of the reasons i stated earlier. 1 Like |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by Drdreyy: 9:34am On Sep 15, 2016 |
fellis: The part i canceled is not correct. You talk/reason as if you don't live in this present time or you don't read/listen to the news. Women (especially the ladies) of nowadays are not the ones we use to know in the 70s/before the 70s or early 80s. That was when women were still women., and very much feminine. Not the ones with masculine tendencies/xtics that we have today. Today we have a lot of dare-devil women that do things men are even afraid of doing and other unimaginable things. There are a lot of female robbers now that kill and Carry AK47 rifles, some are even gang leaders. Alot of women murder their husbands gruesomely nowadays, some even chop off their husband's manhood., how much more a total stranger. And so many other disheartening and sickening practices. We read this news virtually every day here on Nairaland, and other platforms and you can't deny it. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by JoyChinwe22(f): 11:17am On Sep 15, 2016 |
Drdreyy:You think you are so knowledgeable. I weep in English. I won't banter words with you, but I just hope, for the sake of our daughters, that other African men stop reasoning like you. No man should force himself on his wife. It is a crime. You may have paid her bride price but you did not buy her. When she says 'no', find out why and deal with it like a loving husband should; don't exhibit your animalistic tendencies by forcing that 'thing' inside her. Remember, you will have daughters too. |
| Re: How Some Wives Are Continually Raped But Can't Speak Up by JoyChinwe22(f): 11:19am On Sep 15, 2016 |
njiasi30:Thank you, I think you are the only one who understands what this post is about. |
Is This The Future For The Sex Life Of Nigerians / I Don't Know What To Do In This My Marriage Situation / I Dont Trust My Wife Anymore
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