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Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. - Romance - Nairaland

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Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by sherifat23: 3:17pm On Jan 11
pls admin hide my identity, gud afternoon pls nairalander I nid ur advice.Am a lady of 23years am a muslim also a graduate of political science, my story goes thus,during my service year I met a Christian guy whom I love so much buh d problem is DAT my parent won't allow me marry a Christian,a lot has happened btwn us,buh b4 going 4 service I av a fiancée wu is a Muslim and our relationship is almost 6years buh d ish is DAT I don't knw weda I really luv him cus dere are tym we argue alot and DAT he is overzealous he does not want 2 see me wit anyman which I don't lyk cus I lyk 2 be free and socialize buh d prob dere naw is av introduced him despite dat am still in luv wit d oda guy wu is a Christian pls advice me wat shud I do pls no insult.
(
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by Apos2kay(m): 3:21pm On Jan 11
Actually u can just repost this to the romance section, but my advice is that you shld follow ur heart and pray for God's guidance
sherifat23:
pls admin hide my identity, gud afternoon pls nairalander I nid ur advice.Am a lady of 23years am a muslim also a graduate of political science, my story goes thus,during my service year I met a Christian guy whom I love so much buh d problem is DAT my parent won't allow me marry a Christian,a lot has happened btwn us,buh b4 going 4 service I av a fiancée wu is a Muslim and our relationship is almost 6years buh d ish is DAT I don't knw weda I really luv him cus dere are tym we argue alot and DAT he is overzealous he does not want 2 see me wit anyman which I don't lyk cus I lyk 2 be free and socialize buh d prob dere naw is av introduced him despite dat am still in luv wit d oda guy wu is a Christian pls advice me wat shud I do pls no insult.
(
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by mengho(m): 3:26pm On Jan 11
What you want to hear
"Abandon your parents & run away with ur new boy friend'

Follow ur heart & ignore ur almost decade old boy friend for some dude you just met & live happily ever after"

What you need to hear but don't want to
"Talk to ur parents and agree with thier suggestions whatever it is"
grin

Remember you are African, Nigerian & a muslim so quit with the American mentality bullsh*t grin
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by clems88(m): 3:28pm On Jan 11
Well no one can give you the best advice . cos buhari has affected love with change. angry non the less follow your heart and stick with it
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by DDeliverer(m): 3:31pm On Jan 11
Eeyaa. Matters of the heart.

I dey here dey reason how this bitcoin ish take dey work...my dearest sherifat is doing 'I love this one but I'm getting married to that one...this life!

Anyway, follow your heart...Last last, no be your papa or mama go dey with the man, na you!
So fvck religion.
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by Jolonjolo: 3:41pm On Jan 11
Hey! Babe I really feel you. My advice is that you give the whole situation time. Don't rush to make conclusion. Take your time and don't be in haste to make conclusion. If you involve your heart alone, it could get broken, so involve your head. Pray! Think! Give it time!
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by AngelsAndStars(m): 3:45pm On Jan 11
dump Islam and marry the Christian.
else you are going to share dikk of an aggressive man.
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by sweettease(f): 4:00pm On Jan 11
6 years, Hmmmm... New thing dey shack sha, be careful so you don't lose a gem because you never knew its worth. I doubt you didn't love him at all and stayed with him for 6 years, so the excuse isn't really much of an excuse, him protecting his territory isn't the worst thing that can happen for over 5 years. I think the new and different is just exciting, cos I know the new guy isn't perfect either.

1 Like

Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by starwar(m): 4:11pm On Jan 11
You will jejely confused yourself and u will be seeking advice from us.OP u want us to confuse too?
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by yomi007k(m): 4:44pm On Jan 11
In whatever we do we shud think about the long term complications or results because dey will always come.

Personlly I belive there r 3 kind kinds of relationship status.
A. Good Relationship.
B. Bad Relationship.
C. No relationship.


I also think that if u cannot have A, its better to stick with C.

And to be in a relationship Love is d main thing because it comprises commucation, tolerance, trust, etc
The sad thing abt love is dt it may fade, wen we find something new.
U can actually try to fix it or u move on. Choice is yours.

My opinion.

1 Like

Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by ghost3040: 4:54pm On Jan 11
always punctuatae properly so we get ur point properly..took me quite some time to get ur message...back to d topic....i think the elders are yet to arrive..when they do will dish out some advice..
sherifat23:
pls admin hide my identity, gud afternoon pls nairalander I nid ur advice.Am a lady of 23years am a muslim also a graduate of political science, my story goes thus,during my service year I met a Christian guy whom I love so much buh d problem is DAT my parent won't allow me marry a Christian,a lot has happened btwn us,buh b4 going 4 service I av a fiancée wu is a Muslim and our relationship is almost 6years buh d ish is DAT I don't knw weda I really luv him cus dere are tym we argue alot and DAT he is overzealous he does not want 2 see me wit anyman which I don't lyk cus I lyk 2 be free and socialize buh d prob dere naw is av introduced him despite dat am still in luv wit d oda guy wu is a Christian pls advice me wat shud I do pls no insult.
(
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by Oma307: 5:01pm On Jan 11
be diligent in ur choice
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by firstking01(m): 5:14pm On Jan 11
Hmmmn, misef confuse no be small....one think i wouldn't like to do is disobey the orders of my parents, reason is, if you disobey them you are heaping coals of fire on your head....my advice, if you are a christian, pls marry a christian...if you are a muslim i'm sure there are good muslim sisters too, marry them to avoid future complications....as a christian i can never marry a muslim girl but we can date...i can only marry her if she's willing to follow me to christ.
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by sirusX(m): 5:52pm On Jan 11
sherifat23:
b4 going 4 service I av a fiancée wu is a Muslim and our relationship is almost 6years buh d ish is DAT I don't knw weda I really luv him cus dere are tym we argue alot and DAT he is overzealous he does not want 2 see me wit anyman which I don't lyk cus I lyk 2 be free and socialize buh d prob dere naw is av introduced him despite dat am still in luv wit d oda guy wu is a Christian
You don't know whether you really love your Muslim partner

Well, loving someone truly is not something one can tell you, so that part is up to you.

Marriage demands more than love, but regardless...love remains the bond between partners

If you never loved him in over 5years, why did you still put up with him? Why did you lead him on with a promise of a future?

From what you say, it seems he has some qualities you don't like in a partner...well, it's safe to say no one is perfect
But don't let the qualities of another person blind you to the good things the other partner has shown you all these years.

The truth is that your future should be decided by you, especially knowing you want to be happy in marriage...but we come from a world were there are customs, even religious traditions. So, it's easy to understand why your parents act the way they do.

I do hope you think deeply about your actions and weigh the consequences, at the same time look to people you know that are trustworthy enough to enlighten you...especially any Muslim lady who went through the same challenges as you are facing now

Not all parents take this issue lightly, but it all depends on how close you are to them and how you communicate this matter with them

Let's not forget the matter of crossing religions...Are you gonna remain a Muslim, if you decide to go with the Christian?


d problem is DAT my parent won't allow me marry a Christian,a lot has happened btwn us
^^^ About this line, what do you mean by that? I'm guessing it's just service year, so what could he have done to outweigh the 5+ years with your partner?
What do you see in him that makes you want to reconsider your previous introduction?

Do you know if his intentions for you are true? And does he know about your situation at home?
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by Aregs(m): 5:58pm On Jan 11
I'm hear to read the Elders' advices
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by Nobody: 5:58pm On Jan 11
sherifat23:
pls admin hide my identity, gud afternoon pls nairalander I nid ur advice.Am a lady of 23years am a muslim also a graduate of political science, my story goes thus,during my service year I met a Christian guy whom I love so much buh d problem is DAT my parent won't allow me marry a Christian,a lot has happened btwn us,buh b4 going 4 service I av a fiancée wu is a Muslim and our relationship is almost 6years buh d ish is DAT I don't knw weda I really luv him cus dere are tym we argue alot and DAT he is overzealous he does not want 2 see me wit anyman which I don't lyk cus I lyk 2 be free and socialize buh d prob dere naw is av introduced him despite dat am still in luv wit d oda guy wu is a Christian pls advice me wat shud I do pls no insult.
(
Elope with the christian guy....
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by natsuDragneel(m): 6:22pm On Jan 11
OP...Follow your heart...
...take your brains along too tho

.
.
.
.
It ain't your parents who wanna marry your hubby
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by CorGier: 6:33pm On Jan 11
Tell us about how he gbenshed you or GTFO.
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by bukiboy(m): 7:12pm On Jan 11
sherifat23:
pls admin hide my identity, gud afternoon pls nairalander I nid ur advice.Am a lady of 23years am a muslim also a graduate of political science, my story goes thus,during my service year I met a Christian guy whom I love so much buh d problem is DAT my parent won't allow me marry a Christian,a lot has happened btwn us,buh b4 going 4 service I av a fiancée wu is a Muslim and our relationship is almost 6years buh d ish is DAT I don't knw weda I really luv him cus dere are tym we argue alot and DAT he is overzealous he does not want 2 see me wit anyman which I don't lyk cus I lyk 2 be free and socialize buh d prob dere naw is av introduced him despite dat am still in luv wit d oda guy wu is a Christian pls advice me wat shud I do pls no insult.
(

you need to you to be true to yourself.

its you that will be getting married and not your parents. think about your choice very well and be ready for the whatever consequences that comes based on your choices. we choice our religion most times because that's the only thing we are taught right from infancy.

because you argue with the muslim guy doesn't mean you don't love him, he's been protective which is why he's trying to protect you from other guys.

is your relationship with both of them sexual? love is not just about those feelings, its neither what you read in romantic novels. Love and Marriage is HARD WORK and you need to be physiologically ready to venture into it.

i don't think you really need advice, maybe what you're looking for is validation. clear your head from the sexual feelings (if there is any) and focus on more important things like values, compatability, likes, what you share together and be real to yourself.

1 Like

Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by bukiboy(m): 7:37pm On Jan 11
sirusX:


^^^ About this line, what do you mean by that? I'm guessing it's just service year, so what could he have done to outweigh the 5+ years with your partner?
What do you see in him that makes you want to reconsider your previous introduction?

Do you know if his intentions for you are true? And does he know about your situation at home?


sherifat23:


I met a Christian guy whom I love so much buh d problem is DAT my parent won't allow me marry a Christian,a lot has happened btw us


maybe the sex has clouded her right judgement. Sex is sweet and great based on the way your body respond but sex and love are not enough for a successful marriage.
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by sirusX(m): 9:43pm On Jan 11
bukiboy:

maybe the sex has clouded her right judgement. Sex is sweet and great based on the way your body respond but sex and love are not enough for a successful marriage.
If she's in a sexual relationship with the NYSC partner that could be a big hindrance cz that feeling and emotion would be strong and her decisions could veer off from there
Re: Pls Advice!!!no Insult Pls!!!. by sirusX(m): 9:52pm On Jan 11
.

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