Dear Lively Stones,

My husband gave his side of the story of what happened in my marriage. Permit me to give my own side of the story as well.
First of all,I must say that I am very sorry for cheating on my husband with an ex. I am deeply sorry. I know I did something very wrong and unforgivable. The thought of it makes me cringe and I can NEVER forgive myself for what I did. I used to hear of people cheating on their wives and wives cheating on their husbands:never in a million years did I dream that could be me.


My name is Ebiere. I love my husband. We have been married for almost seven years. We are blessed with two lovely children:one boy and one girl.
When Malvin and I got married,we were very happy. One thing though that has been an issue in our marriage is the fact that I have more sexual libido than my own husband. Initially,I accepted the fact that my husband didnt like s*x as much as I did. But after my first child,it got worse. My husband may not touch me for almost one month. It was a miracle that I conceived the second time.
We have been talking about this for some time. He encouraged me to use sexual toys to satisfy myself,even porn. Though that helped but it was not the same. I told him we could seek medical help but he would not listen. He says he cannot go to a fellow man (i.e,a doctor) and say he cannot satisfy his wife,that its a taboo. I tried to get him drugs but he didnt take them as prescribed.
Another major frustration I have is that my husband’s earning has not changed since we got married. The same amount he used to earn is what he still does. Thats not enough for our family of four. Even though I work as a nurse,I also make very little as well. I have encouraged my husband to let me do some side business ,maybe start up a baby clothing shop but he will not agree. He says I should concentrate on raising our kids. Well,I try but we have constant financial challenges and as long as we are not having multiple streams of income,things may not get better. This financial tension causes tension most times. When its time to pay rent,school fees,feeding clothing,etc..we quarrel alot. I stopped asking my mum to assist us after almost seven years because,I was getting embarrassed by the fact that still couldnt stand on our feet.
Recently,I have seen not one,not two…nude pictures that some random ladies have sent my husband. When I asked him,he says he does not know them but how did they get his no? This is really frustrating me. Someone who will nit touch me for almost two to three weeks will be looking at other women naked bodies?
I feel like my husband’s love for me is not as it used to be when we first got married. He keeps saying its not true but how do I explain all the above. I am lonely with my frustrations. Talking to him never gets anywhere. I then decided to stop talking as there was no use. I just wanted my peace of mind.We could go on for days at home without talking. I was sad. I spoke to my pastor and friends. They all counselled me to keep praying for things to change and get better.
So when my husband suggested that we take a vacation,I was really happy. I knew we needed to spend some time to find ourselves and fall in love and talk about our issues. But when we quarreled that night in Calabar after coming late from visiting my friends,my husband said some horrible things he forgot to mention to me. He called me a LovePeddler. He said,I was the reason things were not going fine for us. I was very hurt. I also said some hurtful things to him. I told him he wasn’t man enough for me. In anger we said alot of things.
I dont know but I just wanted to leave the house so I left early next morning. I didnt plan to but I ended up in Timi’s house. Timi,my child hood boyfriend is like an elder brother now. Since secondary school,we have not connected romantically. But seeing him the day before at our place brought back old memories. It dawned on me that the only time I can remember being truly happy was my secondary school days with Timi. When Timi saw me crying that early morning. He comforted me. I was an emotional wreck. From comforting me and holding me to stop crying,we had s*x. Timi is separated from his wife. For a flash moment,I thought our childish oath has brought us back together. But after the act,both of us were ashamed. We spoke about it and Timi was very sorry too. He told me not to tell my husband but I felt it was best to be honest especially since we were trying to mend our marriage.
So thats what happened. I hope Malvin finds it in his heart to forgive me.I have no excuse for what I did. My only wish was that if only Malvin could love me the way a woman should be loved. If only he understood me or tried to. If only he could connect with my emotions. The problems in my marriage are far from over. Timi has to stop shielding me away. We need to talk about us,our future. We need to ask deep questions.
I love my husband very much but it seems he does not remember me anymore…that is the biggest night mare of any married woman. I am married but it feels like I am not. The only thing giving me joy is my children.
I am willing to do anything to save my marriage but I am not sure Malvin wants the same. Whatever God wills,I am fine with it. I just pray Malvin tries to understand and forgive me.
Share my story please. The men may not agree with me. But any woman who is in my shoe would understand my pain and not judge me.  I have sinned,please forgive me my dear husband Malvin. All I want is for you to love me.
Thank you for taking time to read my long epistle.

Ebiere,

Lagos

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www.livelystones.com.ng

Hello Mrs Mavin,

It was nice you gave your own side of the story and also accepted your wrong.
I think at this time, your husband has to accept that you see a counselor or sort the issue together.

Even though there is no excuse for what you did but indirectly ,he caused it.

The issue of sex has really destroyed lots of homes and its something that has to be taken seriously.

Your should calm down and listen to you.

LivelyStones:

Dear Lively Stones,

My husband gave his side of the story of what happened in my marriage. Permit me to give my own side of the story as well.
First of all,I must say that I am very sorry for cheating on my husband with an ex. I am deeply sorry. I know I did something very wrong and unforgivable. The thought of it makes me cringe and I can NEVER forgive myself for what I did. I used to hear of people cheating on their wives and wives cheating on their husbands:never in a million years did I dream that could be me.


My name is Ebiere. I love my husband. We have been married for almost seven years. We are blessed with two lovely children:one boy and one girl.
When Malvin and I got married,we were very happy. One thing though that has been an issue in our marriage is the fact that I have more sexual libido than my own husband. Initially,I accepted the fact that my husband didnt like s*x as much as I did. But after my first child,it got worse. My husband may not touch me for almost one month. It was a miracle that I conceived the second time.
We have been talking about this for some time. He encouraged me to use sexual toys to satisfy myself,even porn. Though that helped but it was not the same. I told him we could seek medical help but he would not listen. He says he cannot go to a fellow man (i.e,a doctor) and say he cannot satisfy his wife,that its a taboo. I tried to get him drugs but he didnt take them as prescribed.
Another major frustration I have is that my husband’s earning has not changed since we got married. The same amount he used to earn is what he still does. Thats not enough for our family of four. Even though I work as a nurse,I also make very little as well. I have encouraged my husband to let me do some side business ,maybe start up a baby clothing shop but he will not agree. He says I should concentrate on raising our kids. Well,I try but we have constant financial challenges and as long as we are not having multiple streams of income,things may not get better. This financial tension causes tension most times. When its time to pay rent,school fees,feeding clothing,etc..we quarrel alot. I stopped asking my mum to assist us after almost seven years because,I was getting embarrassed by the fact that still couldnt stand on our feet.
Recently,I have seen not one,not two…nude pictures that some random ladies have sent my husband. When I asked him,he says he does not know them but how did they get his no? This is really frustrating me. Someone who will nit touch me for almost two to three weeks will be looking at other women naked bodies?
I feel like my husband’s love for me is not as it used to be when we first got married. He keeps saying its not true but how do I explain all the above. I am lonely with my frustrations. Talking to him never gets anywhere. I then decided to stop talking as there was no use. I just wanted my peace of mind.We could go on for days at home without talking. I was sad. I spoke to my pastor and friends. They all counselled me to keep praying for things to change and get better.
So when my husband suggested that we take a vacation,I was really happy. I knew we needed to spend some time to find ourselves and fall in love and talk about our issues. But when we quarreled that night in Calabar after coming late from visiting my friends,my husband said some horrible things he forgot to mention to me. He called me a LovePeddler. He said,I was the reason things were not going fine for us. I was very hurt. I also said some hurtful things to him. I told him he wasn’t man enough for me. In anger we said alot of things.
I dont know but I just wanted to leave the house so I left early next morning. I didnt plan to but I ended up in Timi’s house. Timi,my child hood boyfriend is like an elder brother now. Since secondary school,we have not connected romantically. But seeing him the day before at our place brought back old memories. It dawned on me that the only time I can remember being truly happy was my secondary school days with Timi. When Timi saw me crying that early morning. He comforted me. I was an emotional wreck. From comforting me and holding me to stop crying,we had s*x. Timi is separated from his wife. For a flash moment,I thought our childish oath has brought us back together. But after the act,both of us were ashamed. We spoke about it and Timi was very sorry too. He told me not to tell my husband but I felt it was best to be honest especially since we were trying to mend our marriage.
So thats what happened. I hope Malvin finds it in his heart to forgive me.I have no excuse for what I did. My only wish was that if only Malvin could love me the way a woman should be loved. If only he understood me or tried to. If only he could connect with my emotions. The problems in my marriage are far from over. Timi has to stop shielding me away. We need to talk about us,our future. We need to ask deep questions.
I love my husband very much but it seems he does not remember me anymore…that is the biggest night mare of any married woman. I am married but it feels like I am not. The only thing giving me joy is my children.
I am willing to do anything to save my marriage but I am not sure Malvin wants the same. Whatever God wills,I am fine with it. I just pray Malvin tries to understand and forgive me.
Share my story please. The men may not agree with me. But any woman who is in my shoe would understand my pain and not judge me.  I have sinned,please forgive me my dear husband Malvin. All I want is for you to love me.
Thank you for taking time to read my long epistle.

Ebiere,

Lagos

....see more true life stories


www.livelystones.com.ng