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If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. - Romance (9) - Nairaland

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Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Psoul(m): 9:40am On Feb 09, 2018
JennieCutie4U:
what if he dates you for a day and dumps you the next day...is something wrong with you too? #seriouslyasking?

May be the character odour is so much....lol
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Psoul(m): 9:45am On Feb 09, 2018
biacan:
He even brought the issue on nairaland last year..... I know him very well he knows what I'm talking about ask him

The way u are following dis guy around ehh. It seems u kw all his posts.

U can confide in me, do u crush on this guy?

4 Likes

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Dayg88(m): 9:46am On Feb 09, 2018
RuthDaniels:
Oga Toks you are being myopic here, Haba. This is like saying every break up is the woman's fault. Are you saying there are no men who are unsatisfied even with an angel?

Do you mean all men know what they want ? All men are saints? No man will want to chop and go even when a lady is worth staying with? Stop deceiving yourself Biko!

This thread is just to polish your ego, to cover up your flaws and faults. And you know what some shallow minded ones will support you but that won't change the fact that you are wrong!






I do not engage in conversations like this because they are usually gender sensitive. That being said, if you read the post carefully, you will understand the message being passed across was never about men being saints or women being the cause for break ups. The message applies to both parties. It is okay if you do not know what you want. But it is bad if we do not know what we do not want. If you (either the guy or the lady) are actually worth keeping, anyone would go any length to make you(in the same context) theirs. A year in a relationship is enough to deduce what we do not want or like in our partners. I just do not support the word dump. It is derogatory.

2 Likes

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Israeljones(m): 9:54am On Feb 09, 2018
Saintmary:

It's a pity. The same set of people who ask others to be objective refuse to do so themselves. I think a single mother is better off than a man single at 40. At least she's got someone to love. Single lonely men have a very high tendency for many health problems. Getting hitched helps men live longer. Google it.
typical example of a lady crying foul and a show of unintelligible comment..
mind you everything up there is not meant for me... am in my late 20s....i have seen and relate wif smart and intelligent ladies, definitely we have a chunk of them still in this country...... but its a pity wif comment like urs i wonder if any still exist here on NL
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Toks2008(m): 10:00am On Feb 09, 2018
LaudableXX:

Has it occurred to you that too many men have flaws, just like the women and they are not perfect either? Have you ever heard of the curse of the familiar? No? Let me break it down. undecided

At the start of a relationship, everything is new, shiny and exciting, because the whole affair is still a novelty. wink As days turn into weeks, and weeks into months, then the novelty wears off to the extent that everything becomes familiar, and common place. And that is what our local folks call "see finish." Nothing is exciting, anymore.

In order to stave off boredom, such men go hunting for new things. sad In the process, a new girl catches their fancy and the thrill of the chase begins. It is not that there is anything wrong with the old girl, it is just that the relationship has become stale, common place and too 'familiar.' For a man that is undisciplined, this cycle will recur over and over again. He dates a girl for a while, the affair gets stale, he dumps her citing a multitude of funny reasons, and moves on to another babe. And this beat goes on, repeatedly. But a rational man with a sound mind, will sit down to assess the situation, and try to make his old relationship more exciting, in order to take things forward, and make it more stable. That is what a sane man would do, but too many of my male friends lack the trait and discipline to think things through, and apply wisdom to get their relationships working again. undecided

Exactly the point. ..in most cases,a lady knows the wheats from the shafts but they are just wired to settle for the shafts so if as a lady you tend to see a guy with philandering tendencies yet went ahead to date him then you need to check yourself.

1 Like

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by prejulsuc(f): 10:13am On Feb 09, 2018
MissSlimbody:


It's obvious you're embittered based on your previous threads on NL. And your reaction shows I'm right.


l have never been "dumped" and that rubbish you typed won't make it happen.

I will not trade insults with you.
The true is any girl that knows how her onion,a guy will never dumped her instead she will be d one to back out when the need arise.
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Nobody: 10:31am On Feb 09, 2018
RuthDaniels:
Lol

But wait OO, were you thinking about mouth odour when you typed that? cheesy

Lol..I actually mean character odour. grin some people character dey smell

2 Likes

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by MissSlimbody(f): 10:36am On Feb 09, 2018
prejulsuc:
The true is any girl that knows how her onion,a guy will never dumped her instead she will be d one to back out when the need arise.
True.

1 Like

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Psoul(m): 10:51am On Feb 09, 2018
AZeD1:

Can you explain the difference please?

I agree to a quick extablishment of a logic institution cos you will be the first enrollee.

Dumping a lady is different from parting ways based on genotypic factor or relocation.

Toks2008, please easy wt ur grammar naa. Some ppl are lost.

@AZed1, U dump a woman wen u just wake up and decide u no wan do again without giving the girl enough explanation.

Parting ways is when both of u mutually agree to quit due to one reason or the other. From wot Toks2008 wrote up there
based on genotypic factor or relocation
, it means they agree to part ways due to incompatibility in their genotype or because one of them is relocating to another place that may not offer them the "conduciveness" needed to run a smooth relationship
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by ultimate77(m): 10:52am On Feb 09, 2018
Jamariwolff:
I give up!
This is one pained frustrated nigga.

Ladies abort mission, I repeat, abort,

Don't argue with this person, you definitely won't win.
actually u know what? You lack primary understanding. Speaking English and miss targeting. How did you come this far? Just asking?
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by victorioushands: 10:56am On Feb 09, 2018
MissSlimbody:


It's obvious you're embittered based on your previous threads on NL. And your reaction shows I'm right.


l have never been "dumped" and that rubbish you typed won't make it happen.

I will not trade insults with you.

He's not embittered, he actually made sense. Ever wondered why so many men settle down with women whom some people consider "below" them. A woman who wants to be had for life learns how to behave and does that. Men have little or no power against such women, they simply fall for them for life. There are few terrible me, though, who still mess up no matter what you give them as a woman.
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by ultimate77(m): 10:56am On Feb 09, 2018
Toks2008:


This is exactly why Men use many ladies as intimacy gadgets...you will never see intelligent ladies attacking a writer but they focus on the topic and give fantastic views people can learn from.

As a sapiosexual,I don't ever pray to come across unintelligent ladies and if I mistakenly date them,I dump them with the speed of light.
man, I wish I can see you to buy you one bottle of chilled wine.
I seriously wonder why some ladies think from underneath. I just showed this to my best computer student right now and she's like; the writer is such an intelligent guy.
This ladies on Nl are just something else, I'm still seeking for the one who will not attack posts from their useless point of view.

1 Like

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by nonut: 11:16am On Feb 09, 2018
MissSlimbody:
Who broke your heart

You really need to get over it and move on.
Same crap from Nl girls... Leave the message and attack the messenger.
If a guy goes into a relationship with you and dumps your sorry ass after one year, you ain't worth it.
It's the same with ladies. When they're in relationship that doesn't make sense, they quit.
It's as simple as that. How you failed to understand that beats me.
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by skales67(m): 11:17am On Feb 09, 2018
Saintmary:

pained

A classical representation of what you are passing through from my reply without a solid clue of what to say.

1 Like

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by mhizcassidy001(f): 11:20am On Feb 09, 2018
some guys are just worthless, no matter how much you care for them they will still go astray leaving a gold behind to search for weed after been taught the lesson of there life they will start looking for who to apologise to. dear gfwds if a guy dump you when you have not offended him let him be those devilish spirited ladies out there will teach him a lesson. guys weldon oooo keep enjoying life i pity you[only to those concern]

1 Like

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by nonut: 11:22am On Feb 09, 2018
ManFromJos:
I think something is wrong with NL commenters...
so if u are sitting with a person on the same pew for over an hour enjoying a conversation,.. and suddenly, he/she gets up and moves to the sit in front of you without any excuse or explanation, wouldn't u be forced to 'count ur teeth with ur tongue?'.. common sense would make u check urself.
Same thing here.. If a guy outrightly dumps u without any reasonable reason, then u really need to check urself.
I wonder how different the comments Here would have been if it were actually refering to the male folks .
Besides, checking ur self (be it a guy or a lady) does not mean u have faults.. it would just foster better changes to ur previous self and enable u to quickly move on..
NB; A girl once told me i wasn't even half as serious as her ex.. She walked away,.. After serious reflection, i realised why she said that.. It has helped me alot.. Made me more matured.. She now even tries to hang out with me sef,. Lol,. Make i just dy laff biko.. #CheckUp .
xf
A thousand gbosas!
You got a good head on your shoulders.
Cheers man.

2 Likes

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Nobody: 11:39am On Feb 09, 2018
Psoul:


Help me tell them. One problem wt women is that they don't want to hear that what dey did is wrong. They always want to be praised even wen they are doing the wrong thing.

Tell a girl that what she is wearing or that her make up is not ok. She will likely want to kill you and label u bad belle.
Tell her that she look prettier than the prettiest Angel even wen she look like the worst Calabar masquerade, u will see her smiling like malfunctioning sex doll.
Lmao.. say na malfunctioning sex doll..
but you're right Bro.. if u don't support a motion they are proposing, they'd just label u as a misogynist.. its quite disappointing,.
)"^Ied

1 Like

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by adekhingz(m): 11:39am On Feb 09, 2018
yomibelle:
his loss...QED

I checked ur profile picture. NIce shape. grin grin

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by FRANKOSKI(m): 11:43am On Feb 09, 2018
how about those of you breaking Christ's heart by sinning?
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Nobody: 11:46am On Feb 09, 2018
nonut:
A thousand gbosas! You got a good head on your shoulders. Cheers man.
Lol.. thanks bruv.. i was just saying my own bit tho.. i appreciate
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by AZeD1(m): 11:47am On Feb 09, 2018
Psoul:




Toks2008, please easy wt ur grammar naa. Some ppl are lost.

@AZed1, U dump a woman wen u just wake up and decide u no wan do again without giving the girl enough explanation.

Parting ways is when both of u mutually agree to quit due to one reason or the other. From wot Toks2008 wrote up there , it means they agree to part ways due to incompatibility in their genotype or because one of them is relocating to another place that may not offer them the "conduciveness" needed to run a smooth relationship
So you think everyone that broke up because of genotype or relocation did it mutually?
Or you think everyone who broke up with their partners gave an explanation?

See why I said we need a logic class? You can't make up things on the fly and claim what you said is logically.

So a guy who leaves the country without telling his partner, is that "dumping" or "parting mutually"?
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Psoul(m): 11:51am On Feb 09, 2018
ManFromJos:

Lmao.. say na malfunctioning sex doll..
but you're right Bro.. if u don't support a motion they are proposing, they'd just label u as a misogynist.. its quite disappointing,.
)"^Ied

That's exactly what their problem is. They don't entertain opinion outside what they beliv.
They failed to realize that men are not created to function that way. Even wen men are dancing to ur tune, thet are just doing that for peace to rein not dat u are in possession of their mumu button.

Well, I don't blame them. They are created that way so that they can easily be manipulated by men. If not tell me hw u can convince a girl to remove her clothe for u to chop her and she will agree. After that u dump her. Another guy will come wt that same strategy d former used in breaking her heart and she will still fall for it. That one will chop and run, still next comes wt the same style and she will still fall for it.

I don't call it bn a mumu. Our creator made them so for men to enjoy. If women get men brain ehnnn..... It may take u more than 5yrs to convince one girl to give u access to go in-between her.
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by moe100(m): 11:59am On Feb 09, 2018
MissSlimbody:
Who broke your heart

You really need to get over it and move on.
nawa oo..is that u? u ugly oo

1 Like

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by nonut: 12:03pm On Feb 09, 2018
Some guys meet a lady and within a few months, they get married to the lady.
What does it tell you? He has seen something new he never experienced in his previous relationships.
Most times some guys are not even ready for marriage, but they meet a lady they admire so much and before you could say Jack, they're married.
The fear of losing that lady pushes them to marry her cos other men might be interested too.
The ex then goes around telling anyone who wants to hear how she was used and dumped.
If I'm a woman and I get dumped after a year of serious relationship, I'll try and upgrade myself.
I'll even try to know why the guy dumped me and see if it's something I can change.
I know women who were dumped for someone else because they weren't educated or graduates.
Some guys won't get married to women who are idle or without any form of skill etc.
Some won't get married to lazy or dirty women.
The list goes on and on.
No woman is expected to be perfect, but there must be something that makes you stand out and different from the other bunch. grin

1 Like

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by LaudableXX: 12:25pm On Feb 09, 2018
Toks2008:
Exactly the point. ..in most cases,a lady knows the wheats from the shafts but they are just wired to settle for the shafts so if as a lady you tend to see a guy with philandering tendencies yet went ahead to date him then you need to check yourself.

You are still repeating the same mistake, by blaming only women, for their wrong choices. undecided Many men do the same thing, too. There are several serial philanderers, who also repeatedly choose the wrong kind of men or women to date. It has nothing to do with gender, but everything to do with their psyche, self-esteem or state of mind! sad
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Psoul(m): 12:28pm On Feb 09, 2018
AZeD1:

So you think everyone that broke up because of genotype or relocation did it mutually?
Or you think everyone who broke up with their partners gave an explanation?

See why I said we need a logic class? You can't make up things on the fly and claim what you said is logically.

So a guy who leaves the country without telling his partner, is that "dumping" or "parting mutually"?


You are overwhelmed wt what u think you knw and it makes u not to calm down to read other ppl's opinion and to also comprehend it to make a rational argument.
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by ezelous: 12:38pm On Feb 09, 2018
Toks2008:


I guess this erroneous mindset of "there are many niggas" might just be why the guy dumps the lady cos many ladies tend to use this line as consolatory remarks just to get dumped again and again and again. ..just saying...
kai see finishing o!

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by LaudableXX: 12:45pm On Feb 09, 2018
nonut:
Some guys meet a lady and within a few months, they get married to the lady.
What does it tell you? He has seen something new he never experienced in his previous relationships.
Most times some guys are not even ready for marriage, but they meet a lady they admire so much and before you could say Jack, they're married.
The fear of losing that lady pushes them to marry her cos other men might be interested too.
The ex then goes around telling anyone who wants to hear how she was used and dumped.
If I'm a woman and I get dumped after a year of serious relationship, I'll try and upgrade myself.
I'll even try to know why the guy dumped me and see if it's something I can change.
I know women who were dumped for someone else because they weren't educated or graduates.
Some guys won't get married to women who are idle or without any form of skill etc.
Some won't get married to lazy or dirty women.
The list goes on and on.
No woman is expected to be perfect, but there must be something that makes you stand out and different from the other bunch. grin

Guy, you are generalising. sad Like I explained earlier, the 'curse of the familiar' sometimes affects relationships that have gone on, for a year, or more. And it can lead to a split, if care is not taken. The man who marries a new girl within weeks of meeting her, may do so simply because she is still an exciting novelty to him, and not necessarily because she is better than the former girl he left behind. undecided He might marry the new girl, and the things she used to do before marriage that tripped him, might now come to an end.

A man who dates a lady who is not educated or a graduate, and turns round to dump her for that reason, deserves a tongue-lashing. angry He knew quite well that she wasn't educated or a graduate before he started dating her, didn't he?? Or was he blind? So why did he date her and then use such a lame excuse, to dump her later? In the old days, some of our fathers and grandfathers paid for the education of their wives, through school.

I always advise people, to try and build a friendship with someone you are attracted to, before dating or getting into a relationship with that person. During the friendship phase, you can tell a lot about the person - if he/she is lazy, or idle or lacks a skill. If you are not satisfied with the traits they show during the friendship period, then you can both go your separate ways peacefully, without getting entangled in a relationship. But unfortunately, the word patience and wisdom disappeared from the dictionaries of a lot of people, many years ago. undecided
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by LaudableXX: 12:57pm On Feb 09, 2018
Dayg88:
I do not engage in conversations like this because they are usually gender sensitive. That being said, if you read the post carefully, you will understand the message being passed across was never about men being saints or women being the cause for break ups. The message applies to both parties. It is okay if you do not know what you want. But it is bad if we do not know what we do not want. If you (either the guy or the lady) are actually worth keeping, anyone would go any length to make you(in the same context) theirs. A year in a relationship is enough to deduce what we do not want or like in our partners. I just do not support the word dump. It is derogatory.

No sir. sad Read the OP's post again! He specifically targeted women, and he did so repeatedly. undecided That is why the women on this thread are so opposed to his views. And I think I understand where they are coming from. If he had been gender-neutral, then his comments would have attracted less opposition. The truth is that what he said also applies to men, but he failed to put that into context and failed to balance his views. Both men and women often make wrong choices, when it comes to dating. It has nothing to do with gender, but with a person's decision-making skills, worldview, self-esteem, psyche and lack of clarity.

1 Like

Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Psoul(m): 1:03pm On Feb 09, 2018
Gangster1ms:
These girls thinking they are doing u favour by dating u and that's why u see most of them misbehaving.. meanwhile the real person doing the favour is the guys.. they are helping the girls miserable life sef. My God.. u don use konji scatter this world.. take away that curse from we men and u see these women cry blood cos we no go send them at all!


Buy a intimacy gadget grin grin grin grin grin
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by Barzinime(m): 1:04pm On Feb 09, 2018
Jamari on point? undecided I give up on you too
Ladyhippolyta88:
Jamari jamari always on point.
Re: If A Man Dates You For a year or more And latter Dumps You,check Yourself. by AZeD1(m): 1:06pm On Feb 09, 2018
Psoul:



You are overwhelmed wt what u think you knw and it makes u not to calm down to read other ppl's opinion and to also comprehend it to make a rational argument.
You can't make something subjective a rule doing so makes having a rational argument almost impossible.

The OP stated "If a guy lives a relationship after a year, the lady should herself".

Really? You have no idea why the relationship didn't work but you assume it's most likely the lady's fault?

Does that make "sense"?

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