How to deal with a break up and smile!

Your will power and your determination is the only thing that matters when it comes to moving on after a break up. Nothing else will help you, not your friends and not a string of flings. Hold your ground, convince yourself that you’re ready to move on and get away from the pain. And use these steps to move on and deal with a break up.

#1 Don’t write letters. There’s always a constant itch to get in touch with an ex. When you feel down, when you listen to a romantic song, or even when you’re drunk. But hold that thought. Never try to get in touch with an ex unless you’re just bumping into them accidentally. It’ll weaken your resolve to get over your ex.

If you find yourself writing a long email to your ex, write it if you must but don’t send it. Hold on to that draft copy overnight. When you wake up in the morning, you’d realize that it was just a weak moment and you don’t really want to send the email anymore. By waiting a while, you’d be able to feel stronger about your own resolve. The same rule can be applied to phone calls and texts too.

If an uncontrollable urge to call or text your ex overwhelms you, don’t stop yourself. Instead, just convince yourself that you’ll call the next morning if you still feel like it. Each time you put away a phone call or an email, you’d feel more confident about getting over your ex and moving on.

#2 Deal with the addiction. Exes are an addiction, just like any other serious life threatening addiction in the world. And the worst part here, is that you can’t really cut down a little bit at a time. You have no choice but to go cold turkey and avoid all contact. It will hurt and you will feel terrible, but you’ll feel better a week later, and even better another week later.

Treat your ex like a bad addiction, and learn to deal with the break up. It’ll help you when you start to see your ex as something that’s bad for your life.

#3 The evil selfish ex. [/b]Let’s face it, if your boyfriend or girlfriend dumps you, they’re evil *at least in your head*. If your ex gets rude or yells at you when you try to talk to them, or if they ignore you, or if they look at you with spite and disgust each time you walk up to them, you have every right to believe that they’re evil, selfish little devils. But you know what, you can’t blame them for it.

Your ex doesn’t like you anymore, they despise you. Of course, they could be nicer and try to be more understanding. But you can’t expect every ex to hold you by the hand and help you find the way out. A few exes prefer tripping you and kicking you where it hurts. Hate them for it. But deal with it. And get over it.

[b]#4 Replay your relationship. While you sitting alone and staring at a wall or an empty glass of wine, replay the relationship in your head. Pick the mistakes and the flaws in the relationship, and try to see where things started falling apart.

But remember to pick the mistakes, not the pieces of the relationship. The love affair is over. What you need here is to try and figure out where you went wrong, and where your partner hurt you. Were you trying too hard to please, insecure, clingy, or were you just too busy with your own life? And about your ex, try to pick their flaws too, so you don’t fall for another person with the same flaws again.

#5 Don’t force yourself. For the first week or so, don’t bother trying to convince yourself that you’re over your ex. Just let life take its course. Do your best to get over your ex by keeping yourself occupied, but don’t force your mind to forget your ex. You may be successful in bottling the thoughts, but they’ll always come back now and then in surges that will hurt you more.

#6 Stay miserable. Allow yourself to feel miserable and hurt. But time yourself and keep an eye on the calendar. Give yourself about three weeks to get over your ex. Mark the date on your calendar with a big red marker.

Think about your ex for those three weeks, but constantly remind yourself that at the end of these three weeks, you’ll wake up the next morning and completely overcome the sadness you’re feeling. Keeping a date marked on the calendar can psychologically prepare you to get over your ex. And at times, your wound may heal even before those three weeks!

#7 Fantasize the high road revenge. There are two types of fantasies you can think about after a break up, the I-wish-we-could-get-back fantasy, and the I’ll-get-even-with-you fantasy. Don’t try anything below the belt like spreading naked photos or cheap comebacks like that, it’s not fair and you’ll never forgive yourself for years if you even have the slightest semblance of a conscience.

Take the higher road. Convince yourself that you’ll put your focus and energy into other positive things, so that one fine day, many years from now, you’d do something spectacular with your life. And fantasize scenarios where you’d run into your ex. It’s not fair, but it helps for the moment. And odds are you may forget all about this a few years later. Don’t know what I mean? Go watch Cee Lo’s F*ck you on youtube. Fantasizing about success and exes makes the dreams of success so much sweeter!

#8 Laugh like a crazy person. For the first few weeks, don’t convince yourself you’re happier. Just wallow in your self pity and depression. But once you wake up one day and feel better, a few weeks later, laugh! Feel the happiness well within you. Realize how good you feel. It takes a while, but you’ll feel it when you’re ready. Listen to happy songs, watch funny movies, and laugh out loud. When you’re ready to move on from your sad state, your mind will be more than happy to help you have a nice time.

#9 Curiosity and the no contact rule. The no contact rule is really important. You can use all the other steps and follow it to the tee, but if you screw up here, you’ll be back on square one in no time. Have you ever looked for your ex’s facebook page sometime *just to see what they’re doing*?

The first time you take a peek at your ex’s page, you won’t think too much about it. But as time goes by, you’d end up visiting their page more and more often, until you realize you’re addicted to the idea of wanting to know more about you ex. There’s no escaping your ex once you get wrapped up in the curiosity of knowing more. Avoid it. Don’t stay in contact, and don’t go looking for information either.

#10 Get better and sexier. Have a life, go on out there and enjoy yourself. Sitting by yourself in the corner of the room will never make you feel better. Date others or at least meet a few interesting dating potentials that catch your fancy. Remember, you’ll have a very difficult time moving on if you find out that your ex is dating someone new, especially if you aren’t getting flirty with someone else already.

Work out and get fit. You’ll look better, and the endorphins released in your body will make you feel more upbeat and look sexier.

A heartbreak isn’t the end of the world. Sometimes, as hard as you try to prevent it, break ups are inevitable. What you do next and how you pull yourself together to deal with the break up makes all the difference between a person who experiences a break up, and a broken lover who gives up on a chance to have a happy life again.

Also Read- " 13 ways to Tell a Girl You Like Her Over Text Without Sounding Cheesy "

Read Here- https://www.newsvilla.com.ng/2018/03/29/13-ways-tell-girl-like-text-without-sounding-cheesy/


Source:https://www.newsvilla.com.ng

Also Read- " 13 ways to Tell a Girl You Like Her Over Text Without Sounding Cheesy "

Read Here- https://www.newsvilla.com.ng/2018/03/29/13-ways-tell-girl-like-text-without-sounding-cheesy/

Feeling great already!

So this made front page??
Mtchewww I Sha want to talk say, I need something on shorts!

I go soon toast you.

SapphirePRINCEX:
Feeling great already!

Most people curse and hate their exes when their relationships fail but do not take a look in the mirror and see that they may have contributed (or totally responsible) to why the relationship failed. The bad part is that they carry such bad characters to future relationship and get the same results. If you have had, say, 5 relationships that ended, analyse and ask (objectively), what areas you erred and how to better your relationships. Most old maids are single, not because they have spiritual issues but look closely and see what kept them that way.

If you ever want to deal with your EX, call her again and then pull off her pant and hit her up several times until she bleeds.

next post please

Ok

So people are still dating


Can't put my heart out there again.

take weed to cure ur heart break

A typical Nigerian girl wouldn't break up with u when you have money. Even me wouldn't break up with my girl friend when she splashes money on me. these days, relationship is all about money. Money, Money, Money...!!!!

Make money and see how she will come back to you

Nairaland..... Oh Nairaland..... Going through a terrible breakup now, as a matter of fact, the babe dey Dubai with one G-boy like this, even sent me a WhatsApp message that she is coming back to me. Lol. I don cry tire. Thanks for this post. Learnt one or two

This is great...
Now I can forget abt my ex in peace

Breaking up and getting over it I wish it easy I was down for two months the bissshh still call me today to Bleep me

Just think of Nigeria wahala and you will be fine again

1. Don't block her on your social media accounts, let her be there monitoring your progress
2. Make sure you replace her immediately, I mean in less than a week get someone who you'll flaunt around with both on social media and off social media

3. Think of the islamization going on in Nigeria

The truth of the matter be say, break_up hurt.... I hate break up

For ur movies and musical video #contact;08162560633

Nairaland moderators have penchant for recycling same topics million times, yet to frontpage.

This very subject has been repeated more than the number of active users and guests on Nairaland. It's boring.

Are the moderators and nairalanders out of ideas already?

xynerise:
Just think of Nigeria wahala and you will be fine again

lol thats ajoking one. Getting over ex is not easy but its easy.....do what you have not been doing before. For the heart brokers..sorry ohh

Just2endowed2:


lol thats ajoking one. Getting over ex is not easy but its easy.....do what you have not been doing before. For the heart brokers..sorry ohh

I don't know how I do it but when such happens, I think of other things I am yet to achieve in life.. that is why I don't put up to 50% investment in relationship unless marriage

It's not easy to get over addiction, but if you understand that things change you will be fine.

Best way is grind hard.... Staywoke sleep when you die....


#10

Most of this points is what we all do when a break up occurs,but self control is the key..DO NOT CONTACT YOUR EX IN ANY WAY.Trust me this is a nice post and I agree with the points except getting a new partner so she feels hurt or something(you don’t need that!!!)breakup hurts so bad especially when you’re truly in love with that person..for men,it’s simple just go fix your life,if you’re broke go make money,achieve!!!if it’s your character,work on it better coz it might have happened even twice which caused the both breakup..but most times I think it’s just money..when it all started you’re well off financially,not rich eventually things change,she begins to give you attitude and all that lol,sooner or later she leaves you and cares less..it’s normal to feel bad,cry if must cry and then the best thing is to “grind hard”,I won’t advise you jump into another relationship just to make your ex feel bad lol,trust me it will hurt you at the end,I swear when my ex left me,I felt bad for weeks,really sad,but I just discovered I felt even much better with time,you think less of her and you’re even getting happy,no doubt you still remember her sometimes but not like before,don’t jump Into another relationship,enjoy the free world,relieve yourself of worrying about a partner,Grind hard!!work hard,try new ways to get better financially,think about your future and getting successful,it’s a blessing if you don’t know and an opportunity to fix your life.