MartinCorridon:
NEVER tolerate rape. Report him to the police.

It is so rampant in our society. People even boast in public of rape.

IsaAbubakar/ bloodykiller /akpatiozu1/ 50 other monikers is one i have reported to MODs for boasting he's a pedophile


SAY NO TO RAPE. Let us unite in protecting children

weyreypey:

Wish you well. Everyone deserves security..

smileing:
@vululadilolo

thank you so much. I have not reported to anyone yet
hurt, pains and disdain on myself have left me discouraged.

all these while, I have been offering him all I could (companionship, encouragement, emotional support, friendship, spiritual assistance ,inspiration ) except for my body. and he made me love him so much little did I know he would come for my body .

my worth is not based on the hymen but yet I value my chasity.
I'm broken cos I encouraged people to be chaste. who do I talk to. the therapist I tried talking to tried molesting me too

I'm deformed now as I am feeling suicidal
what I built in years just crashed within a twinkling of an eye

smileing:
@vululadilolo

thank you so much. I have not reported to anyone yet
hurt, pains and disdain on myself have left me discouraged.

all these while, I have been offering him all I could (companionship, encouragement, emotional support, friendship, spiritual assistance ,inspiration ) except for my body. and he made me love him so much little did I know he would come for my body .

my worth is not based on the hymen but yet I value my chasity.
I'm broken cos I encouraged people to be chaste. who do I talk to. the therapist I tried talking to tried molesting me too

I'm deformed now as I am feeling suicidal
what I built in years just crashed within a twinkling of an eye

victorian:







Am not single.

smileing:
@vululadilolo

thank you so much. I have not reported to anyone yet
hurt, pains and disdain on myself have left me discouraged.

all these while, I have been offering him all I could (companionship, encouragement, emotional support, friendship, spiritual assistance ,inspiration ) except for my body. and he made me love him so much little did I know he would come for my body .

my worth is not based on the hymen but yet I value my chasity.
I'm broken cos I encouraged people to be chaste. who do I talk to. the therapist I tried talking to tried molesting me too

I'm deformed now as I am feeling suicidal
what I built in years just crashed within a twinkling of an eye

vululadilolo:


Although It's easier said than done, don't be too hard on yourself. He forced himself on you.He is a predator, you are a victim. You did nothing wrong. Don't let it break your spirit.

Look for a professional therapist( female if you fear being assaulted again). If you can't or don't want to, find a trustworthy ( non-judgemental) family member/friend to confide in. Don't keep to yourself. Get your mind busy and fight those suicidal thoughts.

I guess I don't understand what being chaste means because I don't see why you don't consider yourself chaste : You were forced to act against your belief/faith. If he "convinced" you to continue sleeping with him since you are not a virgin anymore and you don't feel at ease with it, stop it...

Life does not always happen the way we want it. We need to face it and rebuild ourselves differently. It can be hard but it's possible( that's why you need all the positive or professional help you can get).

Once again, don't keep (it) to yourself, find someone trustworthy to confide in, preferably a professional. Virgin or not, rape is a terrible assault to your mental and physical integrity.

Btw, If you are still in contact with him, cut it. It's toxic. I insist, if possible, report him. Wish you all the best !

smileing:
Please I need responsible advice

Many were coming as suitors but I don't know why I let him come closer.

He forcefully took away my pride and I was hurt. He said he did that cos he doesn't want to lose me

I wanted to leave but I couldn't cos I love him.
I don't offer sex cos I'm religious and I believe it's a sin. Told him to wait till marriage but he wouldn't.
for almost a year we ve been courting I didn't allow him touch me.

Till this day he forcefully had sex with me .
He wants to come pay my dowry but I'm not sure that my people will let me marry him. I too went and prayed about him and they told me that he is not my husband (about 5 different people said it)

He is OK, financially, is educated and promising.
But not God-fearing as I wanted.

Now I'm pained for what he did to me .I'm grieved cos I wanted to lose my pride on my wedding night.
and I'm thinking of leaving him cos I'm hurting so much now.

I feel less of myself and sinful too

Please what should I do?

those that married non Virgin how did your spouse take it. I need to know cos it ll help reshaping my mindset

victorian:






Thanks.

Yes, everyone does.
Feeling secured is very important .

victorian:








Am not demonizing men.. That's the reality.

While I was living alone, I was almost raped three times on different occasions cos I wan marry!
First rape attempt! Was in my office! Yes in my office ,some years back. I invited guy wooing me, we've been chatting for a while. And we were like let's hang out. Let meet up at my office, then we can hang out. He came when I was about to close office. I showed him round, he had this innocent smile. I never knew he was a devil. As we were about to leave, I had a pressing headache, I was like u know what let's call it a night. Am not feeling fine. He said eeyah sorry. Anyways to cut long story short, he hugged me , relaxed then he wanted to kiss I pulled back. Come and see his hard grip, I was like pls stop. He had this mad excited look in his eyes. He said cmon? Relax.. I was so pissed, I was struggling, he was laughing saying am. Making him more excited by my struggles, then he pinned me by one of my tables, his hands were just like iron. I was scared, I then remembered security guard is not far from my door.. I said if u don't leave me I will scream and security will throw u out! Leave me now! Then I screamed, he thought I was joking. Security knocked at my door. Madam are u okay? . That's when he let go off me. With shaky hands, I opened the door Security walked him out immediately that's number one

Number two, after some months, I say make I date again. At least I can't be single But I will be careful. We met at my place. Foolish me.. I easily forget. That one sef also tried raping me, but I pushed him and ran out of my house with speed of lighting.

Number three, after a year, I say make I date again. Sighs.. This one happened in his family home. He said everyone will be at home and wants to introduce me to the family, whereas it was just him and his friend. God saved me. Immediately I notice no one at home. I became nervous and ready to run. Lol

And I did ran, when opportunity came.

Ha! God!.. Some men out there are evil. Ladies beware o! Be very careful and alert. Not all. Men u see walking towards u with a smile is harmless. Some are demons! And that's the truth!

victorian:









Well am in a lovely relationship as I type.
Thank God my man didn't rape or attempt to rape me during our dating level.
He's patient and disciplined. That's why i said not all men but considerable number of men these days are not in their right senses.

Although it took me 5years before now to trust, with help of God and foresight choose wisely, start a relationship and maintain a stable relationship with a man.

Later, I Met my only one and only Chef, Mr Romantic, Easy going , works hard, balls hard, but with a sense of peace around him. Am fine but I will never forget the past. It pops up sometimes. Am human.

smileing:


mum or sister is a no
they ll nail me
thanks dear

eelipumpin:
I don't think it's rape. It's one those JUST HAPPENED kinda situations.

Do you know Christ has paid for that sin? The prolong guilt is Satan's stronghold on you.

Righteousness is not our inability to fall but it is our responsibility to rise up when we fall. Christ is our righteousness.

God still sees you as a daughter not a non virgin. He still calls you His own. He still has you in His plan.

Virginity self righteousness really ate u up but this incident should teach you to judge less and value grace.


I wrote all these cuz u said you are Religious.

Don't be hard on your self when God is seeing differently.

Forgive yourself and marry the right Man God has designed for you.

You've learnt your mistakes. He was never a sincere Believer and you knew it.
Just be fine.

weyreypey:

I am NOT Am.
Great. But these rape cases should be carefully observed.... When a lady allows you to play around the point without going inside are you doubting she's setting herself up for rape?

alterswerve:
Virginity is not the same as sexual purity.

OsuMustGo:

Woe betide those bastards

victorian:








But what if she doesn't allow you to play around the point?
Is her polite and courteous nature means she wants to get laid?
Is it bad to be polite and friendly?
Why is it when a lady smiles in one on one discussions means she wants sex?
Should she always frown ?to get the message across that hey don't touch me, cos I don't even know u that well?

insperyadyou:
when you said 'he is patient'. You know how to use words well

smileing:


ok
I ve not considered reporting him but if I do I don't think I have a strong evidence apart from the broken hymen.
is there anything else I need to know before reporting him that ll substantiate my evidence

weyreypey:

Nah. Sex must be consensual all the way. Check my other post

MartinCorridon:


Amen. If one doesn't even have sisters or wives or daughters but we all have mothers....

So why do it to a woman

just like Muhammed the hackSAW forked the hell out of little aisha ?

victorian:







Sex must be consensual, I agree. But rapists do not have the patience for it to be consensual from the lady's part. They simple pounce! Which is completely wrong.

smileing:
Please I need responsible advice

Many were coming as suitors but I don't know why I let him come closer.

He forcefully took away my pride and I was hurt. He said he did that cos he doesn't want to lose me

I wanted to leave but I couldn't cos I love him.
I don't offer sex cos I'm religious and I believe it's a sin. Told him to wait till marriage but he wouldn't.
for almost a year we ve been courting I didn't allow him touch me.

Till this day he forcefully had sex with me .
He wants to come pay my dowry but I'm not sure that my people will let me marry him. I too went and prayed about him and they told me that he is not my husband (about 5 different people said it)

He is OK, financially, is educated and promising.
But not God-fearing as I wanted.

Now I'm pained for what he did to me .I'm grieved cos I wanted to lose my pride on my wedding night.
and I'm thinking of leaving him cos I'm hurting so much now.

I feel less of myself and sinful too


Please what should I do?


those that married non Virgin how did your spouse take it. I need to know cos it ll help reshaping my mindset

Richy4:
This sounds to me like a bad scripted movie...

The dude raped u..and u chose to keep it bottled up...

You said u can't leave because u love him... ok

If you don't want to marry him, and the thought of marrying him has not crossed your mind what in God's name where you doing with him for one year?

You can't have all the package at a go dear.. you said he was financially ok, educated, promising.. etc but not God fearing.. I guess you were thinking that you might change him....and he ended up changing u..
If u loved him as u claimed, accept him with all his faults.. don't let any one decide for you whom to be with..

If you don't want him, you should have ended it long time ago.end it.. don't marry him because you were no longer a virgin...that will be suicidal..
A lot of men would still want to be with you not because of your virginity...

Please next time don't go to a man's house when you know that you won't play ball even if he is an angel.. always meet at a public space.. even when you were hugging him, give some room for Jesus between the two of you..

smileing:
Please I need responsible advice

Many were coming as suitors but I don't know why I let him come closer.

He forcefully took away my pride and I was hurt. He said he did that cos he doesn't want to lose me

I wanted to leave but I couldn't cos I love him.
I don't offer sex cos I'm religious and I believe it's a sin. Told him to wait till marriage but he wouldn't.
for almost a year we ve been courting I didn't allow him touch me.

Till this day he forcefully had sex with me .
He wants to come pay my dowry but I'm not sure that my people will let me marry him. I too went and prayed about him and they told me that he is not my husband (about 5 different people said it)

He is OK, financially, is educated and promising.
But not God-fearing as I wanted.

Now I'm pained for what he did to me .I'm grieved cos I wanted to lose my pride on my wedding night.
and I'm thinking of leaving him cos I'm hurting so much now.

I feel less of myself and sinful too


Please what should I do?


those that married non Virgin how did your spouse take it. I need to know cos it ll help reshaping my mindset

weyreypey:

Like I said in my other post those guys are mostly damaged by molestations at very tender age by trusted aunties.