If your 30 and above, having a partner 20 years older is okay. Otherwise; you'll be manipulated by the age difference and experience that coms along with it.

ho let me run and look for my 20 years younger

What men can do women cn do better

Let's say RMD is still single and eligible and he proposes to you and you are only 18, will you accept or refuse?

I know a successful professor in Nigeria who only got married at 50 plus.
He was a professor at UNN.
He was happy when he was still single at 50 and happier now married to a much younger person and she was the one who convinced him to marry. Because, he was too busy with his projects to be bothered by women who cannot offer him anything more than marriage.

My father married early at 35 and I am over 40 and I am still single and I am very very happy and more concerned about my charities than chasing skirts or being monopolized by a woman in a selfish relationship or marriage.

Most people in Nigeria tell you to marry early so that you can raise up your children before you die.

They also tell you to marry so that you will have children to survive you.

With all the early marriages in Nigeria, we have only increased the population of poor people all over Nigeria. Because millions have rushed into marriage without family planning and have multiplied the socio-economic crises in Nigeria.

The age difference is not even the problem, but the productivity.

Useless relationships have produced useless marriages.

I will only marry for the sake of "Jaiyesimi".
I have a publishing company and the two books I have published between January and February mean more to me than taking a girl or lady to the altar.
Right now, I am more interested in relationships that can turn the fortunes of Nigeria around to improve the state of Nigerians.

What we need most now in Nigeria are not sexual productions, but human capital development.

If I find a young girl of 18 or an older woman of 50 who can inspire me to write a bestseller or make a great film, I will marry her right away. But not all the materialistic girls and ladies who cannot offer anything more upstairs, except to lure you into marriage and make babies and have comfortable families.
Even sheep and goats do that and have been more peaceful than humans.

Look at Nigeria and look at where your ways of life have led us.
The most populous country in Africa and among the poorest in the world.

The sooner we know our priorities in Nigeria the better.

20 years older HELL NO!!!!

I can't even imagine dating anyone who is 45. But it happens everyday, some men suffering from mid-life crisis, having being deceived too many times by their friends that the look younger than their original age, still think they can step up to any young damsel.

When I come across such men at clubs, doing the 2 steps lol, they just make me cringe!!!

I don't see anything wrong with it. Personally, I can date a 40 year old. My boyfriend is 31 and I'm 18 . . . everything is working out fine.

WoW!!! I find that real cool, i mean , I've alwayz fancied big guys they know how to treat a lady right Unlike these lil guyz

Rhodalyn,
Do you support a younger woman and older man marriage?

Personally I can only date a younger woman. But I want her to marry a younger man. Why? For her own peace of mind. I have my life to live.

But if the younger lady is in love with the older man, what should the older man do?
Reject her and break her heart?

I heard that it was Lady Bianca Ono who talked Chief Emeka Ojukwu into their marriage. And they say they are still happily married.

I am really worried, because I have seen younger women falling in love with older men and their parents even welcomed the older men.

I care for humans a lot and that is why I don't condemn anybody engaged in pre-marital sex or extra-marital sex. Because, we did not create ourselves and it only natural to be attracted to the opposite sex. And if the babe is old enough to choose the boy or man she wants to be with, why should we discourage or stop her?
Her security is what matters most. And if the older man can take good care of her, let them be.

Jacob was 47 when he married Leah and waited another 7 years to marry Rachel in the Holy Bible. And from my researches, I found out that they were very much younger than him.

So, when hypocritical "christians" are posing and posturing over an older man getting married to a younger woman, they are only fooling themselves. Because, once the nubile girl or maiden is 18, she is even free to leave her parents and marry the man she wants to be her husband for life.

Jesus Christ never officiated any wedding and none of his disciples did. So, I don't know where churches got their bill of rights to make rules and regulations for marriage. Because, Jesus Christ never gave us such an assignment.

The business of Christians is to make disciples of all nations as Jesus Christ gave us the great commission before his ascended to heaven.

I am making a comprehensive post, because I want to address many religious and moral sentiments on this topic.

kudos to u orinikila

i love what u have just said. and u spoke the truth. u are very wise to me. i respect u for that

yes i can date a guy who is 20yrs older than me. as a matter of fact am in a relationship with a guy who is about 24yrs my senior, we've been 2geda for a year and 5months, and he's talking marriage. i love him so much (and am willing and ready to settle down with him), because he's passionate about life, loves me for me. i think it depends on your heart and what's in it. so if u find ur self in that situation, think about it b4 taking actions.
NB:am no aristo girl.

ya all been talking about girls dating men 20yrs older than them and me i got call from my senior bros (i lived with him when i was a kid) and once he started i knew where he was coming from and where he was going ,finally he came open that he has found a girl that am 11 yrs older than for me and she is in the university too,i told him i would think about it and will tell him what i decide,
i felt 11yrs is too much gap between me and my wife age wise,so i told my Indian friend (female ) about this and she said this "one of you must turn to behave like the other for the relationship to work,either u behave like her age or she has to behave like urs "
now i know this is not gonna be very easy to adjust ,so what do u guys think ?

hey am not trying to bump into the main topic here oooh

initially the age difference wont matter but lets face it sooner or later the age difference will become apparent. you'll be putting on your husband's diapers and helping him into the bath tub.
women are die hard romantics but reality paints a harsh picture. as long as you're ready to do what it entails, knock yourself out!

In my own opinion, I think love as noting to do with age difference.

think about long term, you'd be 60 when they are old and prune yuck

its child abuse

Age is nothing but a 2 digit number. If you see in that person something that attracts you or sparks your interest, then why not see where things may led.

@ topic

Yes it does. At 40 I don't want an old 60 year old being. Ewwww

My ex husband was 20 years older than me. It did not matter in the least for many years. Everything was perfect. Once he reached his 60's however, it did begin to matter. He began experiencing erectile dysfunction and blamed it on me. I was devastated. Also his health began to fail. I would have gladly been there for him to do anything. I loved him so much. He had open heart surgery, developed hypertension, began to dribble urine on himself and had to get his teeth pulled and get dentures. I assured him every day that I loved him and that I would always be there for him but he became vile and mean and talked awful to me. I knew he was going through alot so I just counted his meaness as that and loved him anyway. One day out of the blue, he came home from cardiac rehab. and told me that he was leaving me and moving in with his nurse from the rehab. center. So yes I say age matters sometimes. Maybe not for many years. But eventually it does.

Yes. I have heard some people offline say that age doesn't matter and soon as their significant others reach the "threshold", they are no longer together.

I want to see posts where the one 20 years older is in their 60's and up and see how that is working. And not a new affair but one where the couple has been together for a few years because I can tell you from experience it does matter later. A woman reaches her sexual peak in her 30's. And from what I've read a man does in his early 20's. I'm not saying that they can't perform at that age. They most definately can. I'm saying look at the biological difference even at those ages. Then there are the other differences once people reach 60. I know sex isn't everything. Especially if you love someone but my how things change when you no longer see that person as a intimate partner because the can't control their body functions. You then become their caretaker. Noble of you for sure but after a while you will long for someone to hold you, caress you, be strong for you, desire you. And their time has come and gone. In your 40's you are not yet ready for that kind of life that a person in their 60's has. I know, I know. Age doesn't matter. It's just a number. Love conquers all. No it doesn't. That's crap. Wake up and smell the coffee. You can't say what it will be like when you are 40 and they are 60 unless you are their. You have no idea. I learned more about what happens than I wish I knew.

ya....it matters a lot. both in the side of the man and woman.becausf if a man is 20 years older than his wife,he will get old even when ìs wife is still young.imargine when the man is 50 years and his wife is still 30,the woman may start having an afaire with another man,there by destroying tgeir marriage.And if the woman is the one thats 20 years older than his wife ,then that also has lot of disadvantage such as.the man will not be able to command the woman.and that can destroy their marriage