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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S (84989 Views)
Nigerian Men Speak On Dating Abroad / Filipina Woman Claps Back @ Black American Women Over Black Men Dating Abroad / Wife Of Nigerian Doctor Arrested For Having Sex With Her Student In The U.S (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by zexy2030(m): 10:58pm On Apr 11, 2020 |
FarmTech:u r right, but most women wants to work these days and make their own money. |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by Nobody: 11:14pm On Apr 11, 2020 |
"More so, expecting a Nigerian guy(particularly a foreign student) to have it all figured out( be rich, handsome, sociable, this and that) at the age of 22 is insane." This up there is the problem. Why can't you date out? Must you date a Nigerian? 2 Likes |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by DexterousOne(m): 12:01am On Apr 12, 2020 |
lordeoregon: When life throw curve balls at you You manoeuvre and make the best out of it 2 Likes |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by DexterousOne(m): 4:43am On Apr 12, 2020 |
fujirice: I read your post And what I said you did is what you did You were not happy he painted African way the way he did And st the same time tagged another's way of life as warped African way of life is not a total write off Tho It needs some modification here and there But no call another man way warped if you think your own is not warped That's my point 1 Like |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by Eagba(m): 5:43am On Apr 12, 2020 |
uuzba:Bros how much is the loneliness? is that they avoid you or they naturally don't like associating. cos here in naija, I try to avoid people like fuc 2 Likes |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by emmaodet: 6:15am On Apr 12, 2020 |
HeavenlyCherub: Ok, from your post, you said Marriage is not an accomplishment. Pls, can you list some of the things we can assume are accomplishment? Just want to know and enlighten myself more. |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by HeavenlyCherub(f): 6:21am On Apr 12, 2020 |
emmaodet: I wrote an answer for you, but decided to delete it. Please feel free to make your own assumptions. What ever you believe the answer to be, it is correct. |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by emmaodet: 6:37am On Apr 12, 2020 |
HeavenlyCherub: Lol. Which means, you never answered my question in the first place. So, let us leave it that way. Over and out. |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by Smile4mee01: 7:00am On Apr 12, 2020 |
The curse of the woman is emotional, relational. That is the way nature designed her. She was made for the man and when that is unattainable she moved to her children, after that maybe pets, that why we have so many pets here. Feminist are trying hard to reverse this. But its impossible. So they derive satisfaction from the strength of their relationships. Just as it is for a woman, a man's curse is to labour all the days of his life. To succeed. To be economically balanced. And financially independent. A man derives satisafcation for his job/work/hustle With the ratio of women to men increasing. And the prophesy of 7 to1. Not all women will be married. Some women will have to share thier man. If you girls climb down from your high horse. You will get a man , consider sponsoring an already hard working man in 9ja. Dont look at the help u are doing for him, see it as you are investing in your future kids. And do the best you can to be gentle, kind and homely armed with the fact that he may still misbehave. This is a better option than running out of eggs and dying lonely. Even here in Australia. I always desired to marry a 9ja babe....but with what I see here, I might end up with a lady from another nation. I am so glad I am a man. Feel for my 9ja sisters. 3 Likes |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by airminem(f): 12:33pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
fuckpro:Hey |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by HeavenlyCherub(f): 3:35pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
emmaodet: No I just choose not to. If you choose not to see different perspectives there’s nothing I can do about that. In 2020 I’m just not arguing with anyone. If it doesn’t make me better, make me happier or add to my life. I just don’t make time for it. Protecting my energy and my peace. |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by HeavenlyCherub(f): 3:38pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
emmaodet: No I just choose not to. If you choose not to see different perspectives there’s nothing I can do about that. In 2020 I’m just not arguing with anyone. If it doesn’t make me better, make me happier or add to my life. I just don’t make time for it. Protecting my energy and my peace. |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by emmaodet: 5:02pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
HeavenlyCherub: Point of correction - i don't like argument or quarrel too. It adds nothing to me. When i engage in discussion, it is because i either want to learn something or raise an observation from my own point of view without enforcing it on the other party. I believe in discussion for positive reasons by improving and not imposing my stand or thinking my view and decisions are the best. |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by FarmTech(m): 11:33pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
zexy2030:. They can work. The bible in Psalms even described a good wife as a hardworking person. But the work shud not deprive them of their basic duty as mothers. Else, the children and marriage will suffer. Any lady that will not agree to this during courtship is not worth marrying. |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by EgunMogaji2: 11:18am On Apr 14, 2020 |
ssegs5: I’m good. Just curious if people were paying that much for real estate rentals on Akala. I’m motivated. I’m in Moganna Village. 1 Like |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by FarmTech(m): 9:20pm On Apr 16, 2020 |
zexy2030:. I won't argue that. But let such women know that if they fail in their role as mothers, they will regret their 2morrow. Both in this world and b4 God's judgement seat. Working is good. But not the type that will sap most of their time. I know one family where such a thing happened and right now, their daughters are on the way to prostitution. |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by Leezah(f): 1:53pm On Apr 17, 2020 |
Leezah:or lockdown quarantine |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by Chuky7(m): 9:45pm On Apr 17, 2020 |
Rawhumper: lol...CIA for real?? How did you loose the interview? |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by Rawhumper(m): 10:17pm On Apr 17, 2020 |
Yeah some of d white People online Are secret agents but most People dont know.D Can b working legit in a normal biz or Work. Dont want to Remember d last bro..it has happened it has happened. A Girl dat visited me today i told her there is nothing she does i wont understand b4 she tot i was blabbing but afta tryin 2b smart wit me i made her realize i knew Abt dat...i May Look Young but in Experience am a grandfather....when i saw her off,i didnt know some Yahoo Guys dat passed when i was seeing her off were Inside d car waiting 4her patiently at d estate gate to toast her. I felt it when i later asked her she Said if i hv powers,i laughed.She accepted d indeed stopped her but she ignored dem and crossed d Road n enter keke.Well it May or it may not b true she ignored dem. L quote author=Chuky7 post=88557690] ...CIA for real?? How did you loose the interview?[/quote] |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by castrokins(m): 9:16am On Apr 19, 2020 |
I Feel Terrible About Your Experiences. And Moreso, The Guy Who Traveled Back To Marry His "Real" Girlfriend After Securing His Papers With Another Lady. I Read About This Quite Often. Why Do Some People Feel It's Okay To Use People As A Means To An End? HeavenlyCherub: 2 Likes |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by HeavenlyCherub(f): 11:44am On Apr 19, 2020 |
castrokins: That is people for you dear. I can only pray for God to heal me. I don’t think I can ever love again. Even in marriage. To me it will always be a transaction first rather than love |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by ednut1(m): 12:42pm On Apr 19, 2020 |
HeavenlyCherub:i think humans should do away with love and make it transactional. Love is like exposing your self to danger |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by castrokins(m): 2:21pm On Apr 20, 2020 |
Surely, Healing Will Come For You. But You'd Be Willing To Accept The Healing. A Marriage Not Founded On Love Can Only Be Waverying. And So, You'd Have To Deliberately Set Yourself On The Path Of Healing In Order To Marry For Love. I Have Had A Few Bad Relationships In The Past, But I Still Want To Get Married. I Still Want To Love And Be Loved. This Can Only Be Possible If I Reach Out For Love Genuinely And Deliberately, Regardless Of Whatever Happened In The Past. HeavenlyCherub: 1 Like |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by kumulus(m): 6:11pm On Apr 20, 2020 |
HeavenlyCherub: Life itself is transactional.....always will be |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by Nobody: 11:52pm On Apr 21, 2020 |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by Smile4mee01: 6:30am On May 10, 2020 |
CsRockefeller: Melbourne, Under 1 yr, Tribe- Yoruba/Edo, in fact, Lagos boy. I only understand Yoruba. It would be fun to meet up with Nigerians. |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by CsRockefeller(m): 9:53am On May 10, 2020 |
Smile4mee01: Cool but, the lady in question has been there for over 3 years now, she's Igbo and I don't think she will be interested. She's not even in Melbourne. |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by Smile4mee01: 11:33am On May 10, 2020 |
Thanks bro.. At least you try. You deserve one crate of cold bottled origin. CsRockefeller: |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by jumissy: 1:35am On May 12, 2020 |
A lot of comments are so disheartening. Everybody is trying to not get burned....or burned again. People have their defences up. Men pass by very good women but have preconceived notions from past experience, their ideals, and unrealistic expectations. And women do the same. The trouble is for people who don't fit into their preconceived notions but are written off already, because everybody has their defences up instead of entering a new relationship healed, learned from past experiences (rather than being bitter), and with a fresh, open mind. Sometimes, it seems people like drama. When someone doesn't have issues they complained of, then they focus on a minor issue they could have worked on with communication, especially when you are with a good, understanding person. Sometimes, though, one person doesn't open up or is impatient to let the person work on that minor issue that seems so important. Marriage is for mature people. If you cannot be patient with a partner before marriage, it's going to be difficult dealing with the person later in the long adventure of marriage. Many people, both men and women, spend more time looking for someone who has the superfluous qualities on their checklist. Their hearts are more set on finding someone with those qualities than finding someone with the important qualities that marriage cannot survive without. In this life, doing things at the right time is important, even for men. Some people are unserious, playing for long and believe time is on their side, but by the time they make up their mind or think is the right time, they end up with less than "ideal" situations and wish they could have done things differently. People evolve over time. Nobody has it all together from the onset. Even if everything on your checklist for a partner is checked, you will later find some areas for improvement. If you can find someone who has the qualities that marriage cannot survive without, you're good to go. All other superfluous qualities will come easier to develop in that partner. The issue is knowing the qualities that marriage cannot survive without and knowing how to separate it from superfluous qualities you thought are so important but really are not important for the survival of a good marriage. You and your partner can communicate and work together on those superfluous qualities. Additionally, doing this will draw you together, to understand each other more and bond more, strengthening your relationship. 1 Like |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by Troynewyork(f): 5:38am On Aug 09, 2020 |
I just want to say not all marriages between afro Americans and Nigerians are the same.I am married to an (Igbo).He is very ambitious,hard working,a real go getter.It is not the Nigerians fault that they have a care, house,good job within a short time after coming here.Why??because he took advantage of the opportunities surrounding him.A large number of men here booth black and white don't take advantage of opportunities surrounding them everyday.The city where I live,there are no less than 10 places right in this area that are hiring immediately.I love Nigeria, the culture, food.Ok, the average Nigerians man is a little dominant,oga is going to be oga.That is fine by me because I love me a man's man because I am a woman's woman I love taking care of my little family. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Loneliness & Dating Abroad: Perspectives of a Nigerian Student in The U.S by erico2k2(m): 12:59pm On Aug 10, 2020 |
FarmTech:And we say we want to move 4ward, when you get married and it is called white wedding then waht you described above is what you have just subscribed to, you cant pick and chose! |
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