DreManuel:


You've raised a valid point. Most Nigerian women overseas want to have their cake and eat yours. They want you to play the traditional man's role but at the same time, they often don't want to play the traditional woman. For instance, every date I have been to with WW, they almost always offered to pay their own bills. Nigerian women or AA women, on the other hand, want you to pay for them, and if you refuse, they would become grumpy.

Bro you need to see how suprised I was the first day I went to the movies with a WW. The lady offered to pay for her own stuff but I paid for everything. On our second movie date, she paid for everything and she did not allow me to spend one cent. Naija girls will even demand you pay for her uber to come see you. smh

Jainine:



Very wrong! The egoistic behaviour is rooted in most Nigerian men upbringing and even when they meet women who know their worth and don't stoop to begging and_shit, they still can't stop and on here we are particularly talking about women who work and earn enough to care for themeslve in America, and men who still want to enslave and form stupid alpha. But when they meet a white woman they start to feel like inferior piece of shit, kiss her_ass and licking the floor she walks. Ofcourse this is not everyman, but vast majority who are used to mummy being disrespected and disregarded

I agree with your points...Most men (not just black men) that are new to America worship white women but the ass licking wears away with time especially after you sample a couple of white puna. Nigerian women are well educated and earn good money (I respect them for that). But no matter how much they earn, the average naija girl still expect the man to spend & pay 90% of the bill in every relationship.

Also are we gonna pretend that naija girls don't kiss ass when it comes to white boys? You guys demand heaven and earth from naija boys but all a caucasian boy need to do is say hello and y'all spread your leg for them. Marriage between white men and black women has the lowest divorce rate because black women abandon all their standards and requirements for any basic white boy. They cook, clean, work, pay bill and do as the white man demands. So keep the same energy for both gender

Kobojunkie:

If only that were true, but I am afraid you are wrong.

That is my own experience and the experience of most guys around me. You might have different experience or opinion and that's fine but don't say that I'm wrong

Rickywowoz:


I agree with your points...Most men (not just black men) that are new to America worship white women but the ass licking wears away with time especially after you sample a couple of white puna. Nigerian women are well educated and earn good money (I respect them for that). But no matter how much they earn, the average naija girl still expect the man to spend & pay 90% of the bill in every relationship.

Also are we gonna pretend that naija girls don't kiss ass when it comes to white boys? You guys demand heaven and earth from naija boys but all a caucasian boy need to do is say hello and y'all spread your leg for them. Marriage between white men and black women has the lowest divorce rate because black women abandon all their standards and requirements for any basic white boy. They cook, clean, work, pay bill and do as the white man demands. So keep the same energy for both gender

This is getting interesting...


You see, white boys (not the racist ones) actually respect black women, I am not even talking about relationship wise yet, I am talking about generally, the white guys are not brought up to see their sisters or other women as any less than they are, if anything they are brought up to respect and support women. When they meet Nigerians, they bring that same energy into the room, and even if she is always on her guard, she will loose her guard quite easily because most people actually shouting for equality in and from Nigeria do so because of level of disrespect Nigerian men have for women.


Before we make this a debate on white vs black, I should quickly point out what point am trying to pass.

Even when a Nigerian woman, pays her own bill and doesn't beg for money from Nigerian men, they will want to bring her low to the level Nigerian culture set for women, under a man's feet. But when they meet white women they can't keep the energy


Secondly, white boy/black girl relationship or marriage is winning because the white boys do not have the same values and disrespectful upbringing. They adore women, respect them and love them.



All I'm saying and from what op has said is for Nigerians to learn humility and respect toward women. That is the reason for the happy marriages between black women and white boys



Cheers!

I co-sign this:

Rickywowoz:


I agree with your points...Most men (not just black men) that are new to America worship white women but the ass licking wears away with time especially after you sample a couple of white puna. Nigerian women are well educated and earn good money (I respect them for that). But no matter how much they earn, the average naija girl still expect the man to spend & pay 90% of the bill in every relationship.

Also are we gonna pretend that naija girls don't kiss ass when it comes to white boys? You guys demand heaven and earth from naija boys but all a caucasian boy need to do is say hello and y'all spread your leg for them. Marriage between white men and black women has the lowest divorce rate because black women abandon all their standards and requirements for any basic white boy. They cook, clean, work, pay bill and do as the white man demands. So keep the same energy for both gender

Jainine:



This is getting interesting...


You see, white boys (not the racist ones) actually respect black women, I am not even talking about relationship wise yet, I am talking about generally, the white guys are not brought up to see their sisters or other women as any less than they are, if anything they are brought up to respect and support women. When they meet Nigerians, they bring that same energy into the room, and even if she is always on her guard, she will loose her guard quite easily because most people actually shouting for equality in and from Nigeria do so because of level of disrespect Nigerian men have for women.


Before we make this a debate on white vs black, I should quickly point out what point am trying to pass.

Even when a Nigerian woman, pays her own bill and doesn't beg for money from Nigerian men, they will want to bring her low to the level Nigerian culture set for women, under a man's feet. But when they meet white women they can't keep the energy


Secondly, white boy/black girl relationship or marriage is winning because the white boys do not have the same values and disrespectful upbringing. They adore women, respect them and love them.



All I'm saying and from what op has said is for Nigerians to learn humility and respect toward women. That is the reason for the happy marriages between black women and white boys



Cheers!

Even in your response, you're elating WM as pure, perfect, respectful, and chivalrous. Isn't it funny how you described the "white boy/black girl relationship or marriage" as "winning"? Let's cut the crap, BW have different standards for BM, but that's none of my business because I don't give a flying fck who they date or don't date. Again, not all non-racist WM are respectful. In fact, they feel the most entitled because they are arguably the most desired (every race wants them and they know it). Side note, most things Yte boys do that BW may consider sweet and chivalrous, but if a BM does the same thing, they could consider him weak and lame. You can't just win. It's common with AA women tho but a few Nigerian women act that way too.

In one of the schools that I attended, I saw how "our" single "sisters", especially the attractive ones, change tone when they are talking to Yte boyz. In fact, I've seen how a few of them didn't like to talk to fellow African students that are male (they acted like though you're subpar) but these were the same girls drooling over yte boyz who often dog them, and toss them around. The Nigerian men that I know may not be perfect but they are not that snobbish. Nigerian women that are more relatable are those that are married, "old" and are under pressure to settle down, in a relationship, or not too blessed with looks.

We may be viewing this issue from different lenses because I don't know the social class of the Nigerian women and men you're talking about, but most men in my circle are professionals in no need of anyone's paper, looking to build with someone and not to tear anyone down or subjugate them. So I won't be too critical of your perspective.

I don't "own" Nigerian women or BW, and they don't "own" me too. Let everyone date or marry whoever makes them happy, and let no one question them for their choice.

Jainine:

This is getting interesting...
You see, white boys (not the racist ones) actually respect black women, I am not even talking about relationship wise yet, I am talking about generally, the white guys are not brought up to see their sisters or other women as any less than they are, if anything they are brought up to respect and support women. When they meet Nigerians, they bring that same energy into the room, and even if she is always on her guard, she will loose her guard quite easily because most people actually shouting for equality in and from Nigeria do so because of level of disrespect Nigerian men have for women.
Before we make this a debate on white vs black, I should quickly point out what point am trying to pass.

Even when a Nigerian woman, pays her own bill and doesn't beg for money from Nigerian men, they will want to bring her low to the level Nigerian culture set for women, under a man's feet. But when they meet white women they can't keep the energy
Secondly, white boy/black girl relationship or marriage is winning because the white boys do not have the same values and disrespectful upbringing. They adore women, respect them and love them.
All I'm saying and from what op has said is for Nigerians to learn humility and respect toward women. That is the reason for the happy marriages between black women and white boys
Cheers!

I have equally observed this myself !
Many of my Nigerian gals married to white men, have less drama to deal with in their relationships compared to the gals married to Nigerian men. The difference is like night and day in some cases, almost to the point of boring since the gals married to whitemen rarely have real complaints for me to listen to..

@DreManuel

I agree with you 100%. From what Jainine said, I already knew she might be among the people that ass lick and glorify white boys that is why I didn't bother to respond. An average looking white boy understands his privilege and don't give a shit about women, these guys don't even pay for date (they split everything 50:50). They even prefer to marry their fellow white but they use BW for their sexual pleasure. In most marriages between BW and WM, the WM are very old with wrinkled face but BW doesn't care because they worship anything white.
Whether you believe it or not, Nigerian men are among the most desired in the black race.

Lastly, I don't give a shit who anyone dates, don't come bashing naija boys as disrespectful. If we that bad, why are other girls flocking around us

Kobojunkie:

I have equally observed this myself !
Many of my Nigerian gals married to white men, have less drama to deal with in their relationships compared to the gals married to Nigerian men. The difference is like night and day in some cases, almost to the point of boring since the gals married to whitemen rarely have real complaints for me to listen to..

If that’s the case, then I highly encourage Nigerian girls abroad to actively seek and only get married to WM. They deserve all the happiness in life, and should not get with the purported kill-joy and oppressive Nigerian men.

@DreManuel
@riskywowoz

One of you quoted me saying black men are the most desired the other one said white men are.... Lol not like it's important, it was just funny coincidence I thought I should point out.

This has nothing to do with physical attraction, let's be clear blackmen and women are the most attractive! so this is not about kissing white boys ass... This is about how to treat a woman right and why egoistic Nigerian men find it hard to cope with Nigerian girls who know they deserve better, Home or abroad but same girls tend to be swiped away by some random white dude.

Kobojunkie:

I have equally observed this myself !
Many of my Nigerian gals married to white men, have less drama to deal with in their relationships compared to the gals married to Nigerian men. The difference is like night and day in some cases, almost to the point of boring since the gals married to whitemen rarely have real complaints for me to listen to..

I didn't even point out how, from the start a white guy is not trying to woo a black girl with material thing but being there, caring, supportive, loving, Sweet, Building a real thing.


Not Nigerian men, they will say they don't have time for all that... Soon they will say women leave when they get broke. Where as all the foundation of their relationship was built on money money.


Thats by the way, I'm sure your biracial couple friends fight over how much pepper go into the meal when they are cooking



And on a final note. I respect men who respect women (white men or black men) and that_shit doesn't make you weak, It's sexy as hell!

Peace out!

Jainine:
@DreManuel
@riskywowoz

One of you quoted me saying black men are the most desired the other one said white men are.... Lol not like it's important, it was just funny coincidence I thought I should point out.

This has nothing to do with physical attraction, let's be clear blackmen and women are the most attractive! so this is not about kissing white boys ass... This is about how to treat a woman right and why egoistic Nigerian men find it hard to cope with Nigerian girls who know they deserve better, Home or abroad but same girls tend to be swiped away by some random white dude.







I didn't even point out how, from the start a white guy is not trying to woo a black girl with material thing but being there, caring, supportive, loving, Sweet, Building a real thing.


Not Nigerian men, they will say they don't have time for all that... Soon they will say women leave when they get broke. Where as all the foundation of their relationship was built on money money.


Thats by the way, I'm sure your biracial couple friends fight over how much pepper go into the meal when they are cooking



And on a final note. I respect men who respect women (white men or black men) and that_shit doesn't make you weak, It's sexy as hell!

Peace out!

I’m not delusional, being attractive is different from being desired. Don’t know who told you that BM are the MOST desired.

I don’t know about the pepper fight o, but at least they could always cook their meals separately.

Peace and blessings.

Jainine:
@DreManuel
@riskywowoz

One of you quoted me saying black men are the most desired the other one said white men are.... Lol not like it's important, it was just funny coincidence I thought I should point out.

This has nothing to do with physical attraction, let's be clear blackmen and women are the most attractive! so this is not about kissing white boys ass... This is about how to treat a woman right and why egoistic Nigerian men find it hard to cope with Nigerian girls who know they deserve better, Home or abroad but same girls tend to be swiped away by some random white dude.







I didn't even point out how, from the start a white guy is not trying to woo a black girl with material thing but being there, caring, supportive, loving, Sweet, Building a real thing.


Not Nigerian men, they will say they don't have time for all that... Soon they will say women leave when they get broke. Where as all the foundation of their relationship was built on money money.


Thats by the way, I'm sure your biracial couple friends fight over how much pepper go into the meal when they are cooking



And on a final note. I respect men who respect women (white men or black men) and that_shit doesn't make you weak, It's sexy as hell!

Peace out!

I don't know if you can't comprehend what I said but make no mistake please. I said that Nigerian men are among the most desired in the black race. I didn't say that black men are the most desired. Those two claims are not the same.

Jainine:

Thats by the way, I'm sure your biracial couple friends fight over how much pepper go into the meal when they are cooking
And on a final note. I respect men who respect women (white men or black men) and that_shit doesn't make you weak, It's sexy as hell!
Peace out!

I don't like to hear of their kind of drama.... I don't call them often cause there is not much to hear them complain about.

2buffagain:


First of all, understand something.
The laws in place in the west were setup by white male simps due to feminist pressure.
White men are generally spineless when it comes to their wives.
I like the idea of feminism, but it's implementation in many accounts is lacking.

Secondly, You say "family power" is useless. That shows you lack understanding.
"Power" is not about who is in power. Power is about who controls who is in power.
Like the old saying goes, the man is the head but the woman is the neck. The neck will always control where the head points.

Women are smart. Being the neck means you can rule without necessarily having to take responsibility for your rulership choices when things go sour.
Through incompletely thought through yet suggestive requests, these men in power figured it would be good to allow certain laws.
Women and children first has always been the motto. Men have always considered themselves expendable.

They felt like knights in shining armor after creating these laws because who wouldn't want to "protect women"? In so doing, laws that were meant for one thing i.e protection from physical abuse blah blah blah, have been abused by these same women to one-up men in any domestic dispute that happens.

Even look at the naming of some laws. VAWA...Violence Against Women Act...not Violence Against Spouses Act. That shows the intent of these laws and their originally altruistic intent. But as lawmakers never learn, before passing laws, always think about how that law can be abused, and make adjustments accordingly. Sadly they did not tackle these adjustments fast enough and now an entire industry has been built around the intimidation and oppression of men through divorce thuggery.

Whenever an industry has been built around a societal failure, that failure then becomes harder to rectify due to special interests.
Just look at the diabolic persistence of the generator industry in Nigeria as a result of the government's failure to buildup its infrastructure in time.

The only way to truly be safe as a man of his own accord in the west is to simply not marry and to not live together with a woman long enough for common law to kick in. That last one is something not a lot of guys know. Common law is also a nasty trap as well. The way it is set up in the US, women should be the ones paying men groomprice to marry, because they basically can take everything from you if they wake up one morning and are tired of you...even if you have proof that she cheated. There is a saying, "It's cheaper to keep her".

To the matter of prenup, yes it is very helpful, but only if you already had some assets from before you married her.
Because after you marry her, any new assets are within her grasp. Prenups are not bullet proof though and many family courts do throw it out the window, and all she would have to prove is "He made me sign it under duress" which, if she has a good lawyer (who you would also likely be paying for), could probably be "proven" on some esoteric and weird level.
Also, if you ever want there to be a penalty for your spouse cheating, a prenup is the only place to define that. The family court will not factor in that she cheated when raping your wallet and giving her your house in the event of a divorce.

However if you must marry, Honestly, the best strategy for western marriage as a man...

- Marry a woman who has and makes her money on the same level as yours or more.
- Never take on a woman as a financial project.
- Encourage her to always think on what to bring into the union as supposed to just what to take because she is a woman.

This will mean a more fair resolution in case things break in the future.
That is the only pure way to not get ganked as a man in the West.

"I am a woman and a real man would xyz blah blah blah" Is an old, cheap and outdated trick used on easily manipulated men, and women know this.
Your wife too should also buy you gifts not just one way. I saw a video of a woman surprising her loving husband with a brand new Tesla. No be human she be?

op frm wat u have written something jux came to mind does these laws apply to same sex marriage.if a lesbian divorce.who will collect d property Nd who will get d child support

Ogaonos:
op frm wat u have written something jux came to mind does these laws apply to same sex marriage.if a lesbian divorce.who will collect d property Nd who will get d child support

The general rule of thumb in western cultures is:
In family affairs, the brokest person and/or the person in the most feminine position always wins.

Even same sex couples must have a masculine and feminine dynamic.
A man staying home for years being a house-husband while his wife pulls in all the money, is also feminine.

This is why it is asset suicide to get with a spouse who has no plans of being financially relevant here.
All they need to do is marry you and they become your problem for life.

Whether you divorce them, or they divorce you, or they cheat, it doesn't matter. The end result is the same. You will pay for being foolish enough to marry a financially irrelevant person.

Ogaonos:
op frm wat u have written something jux came to mind does these laws apply to same sex marriage.if a lesbian divorce.who will collect d property Nd who will get d child support

straight or same sex marriage can be settled amicable or sometimes 50/50 % of assets acquired within the period of marriage or prenup of the marriage

cococandy:
I’ll say that on the basis of equality and fairness, things are better for women here than it is for women in Nigeria (my personal experience. Anyone feel free to disagree please) but women here still have a[b] loooong way to go in achieving real and true equality[/b]. And it’s awork in progress. It took thousands if not millions of years to build the patriarchy, I don’t expect it will be dismantled in a few decades.

Why people think that women have overrun America (or the west as most ignorantly call all 1st world nations) is because for those who benefit from the oppression, equality seems like they are being cheated of their birthright. And they don’t know how to adjust to a world where they have to treat others like they want to be treated.

Let's delve into this more.

Why do you think we still have a long way to go in the west before true equality for women? This discussion warrants its own thread https://www.nairaland.com/5863788/why-women-west-still-say

Some Ladies wey never pass Obalende don suddenly turn foreign relationship expert. I dey sight una sha.

2buffagain:


First of all, understand something.
The laws in place in the west were setup by white male simps due to feminist pressure.
White men are generally spineless when it comes to their wives.
I like the idea of feminism, but it's implementation in many accounts is lacking.

Secondly, You say "family power" is useless. That shows you lack understanding.
"Power" is not about who is in power. Power is about who controls who is in power.
Like the old saying goes, the man is the head but the woman is the neck. The neck will always control where the head points.

Women are smart. Being the neck means you can rule without necessarily having to take responsibility for your rulership choices when things go sour.
Through incompletely thought through yet suggestive requests, these men in power figured it would be good to allow certain laws.
Women and children first has always been the motto. Men have always considered themselves expendable.

They felt like knights in shining armor after creating these laws because who wouldn't want to "protect women"? In so doing, laws that were meant for one thing i.e protection from physical abuse blah blah blah, have been abused by these same women to one-up men in any domestic dispute that happens.

Even look at the naming of some laws. VAWA...Violence Against Women Act...not Violence Against Spouses Act. That shows the intent of these laws and their originally altruistic intent. But as lawmakers never learn, before passing laws, always think about how that law can be abused, and make adjustments accordingly. Sadly they did not tackle these adjustments fast enough and now an entire industry has been built around the intimidation and oppression of men through divorce thuggery.

Whenever an industry has been built around a societal failure, that failure then becomes harder to rectify due to special interests.
Just look at the diabolic persistence of the generator industry in Nigeria as a result of the government's failure to buildup its infrastructure in time.

The only way to truly be safe as a man of his own accord in the west is to simply not marry and to not live together with a woman long enough for common law to kick in. That last one is something not a lot of guys know. Common law is also a nasty trap as well. The way it is set up in the US, women should be the ones paying men groomprice to marry, because they basically can take everything from you if they wake up one morning and are tired of you...even if you have proof that she cheated. There is a saying, "It's cheaper to keep her".

To the matter of prenup, yes it is very helpful, but only if you already had some assets from before you married her.
Because after you marry her, any new assets are within her grasp. Prenups are not bullet proof though and many family courts do throw it out the window, and all she would have to prove is "He made me sign it under duress" which, if she has a good lawyer (who you would also likely be paying for), could probably be "proven" on some esoteric and weird level.
Also, if you ever want there to be a penalty for your spouse cheating, a prenup is the only place to define that. The family court will not factor in that she cheated when raping your wallet and giving her your house in the event of a divorce.

However if you must marry, Honestly, the best strategy for western marriage as a man...

- Marry a woman who has and makes her money on the same level as yours or more.
- Never take on a woman as a financial project.
- Encourage her to always think on what to bring into the union as supposed to just what to take because she is a woman.

This will mean a more fair resolution in case things break in the future.
That is the only pure way to not get ganked as a man in the West.

"I am a woman and a real man would xyz blah blah blah" Is an old, cheap and outdated trick used on easily manipulated men, and women know this.
Your wife too should also buy you gifts not just one way. I saw a video of a woman surprising her loving husband with a brand new Tesla. No be human being like una she be?

.

With all this, its better not to even Marry. Just live your life alone and be free from man's perfect law. Marriage isn't compulsory and it seems to be the major source of sorrow these days.

Its better not to marry

Blueelf:
.

With all this, its better not to even Marry. Just live your life alone and be free from man's perfect law. Marriage isn't compulsory and it seems to be the major source of sorrow these days.

Its better not to marry

I read somewhere that in the lower plains of existence, a diabolic strategy was instigated regarding human marriage.
"Let there be marriage, but let there be no perfect agreement in marriage"....predicated on the biblical statement "How can 2 walk together unless they be agreed?".

There is a reason why the family that prays together often stays together.
That marriage thing is best navigated with harmonic blessings from above...from start to finish.

salford1:

I like this except the account part is kind of grey. My wife and I are both professionals so we both bring home descent incomes. We have seperate checking accounts. We have separate savings account. Then we have a joint investment account and joint bills account. We both contribute equally into the joint investment and joint bills every month. I do not know how much she keeps in her personal checking and savings neither does she knows mine except we tell each other.

This is how we have been able to maintain sanity around our finances at home. Prior to this method when we had access to each other's account, we would often argue/fight about our spending which was seriously straining the marriage.

I'm definitely gonna lean towards this when the time comes. Kudos Sir.

2buffagain:


Let's delve into this more.

Why do you think we still have a long way to go in the west before true equality for women? This discussion warrants its own thread https://www.nairaland.com/5863788/why-women-west-still-say

Why should I get into this with you? What’s the incentive for me?

cococandy:


Why should I get into this with you? What’s the incentive for me?

It doesn't affect me one bit.
You people are the ones that says you want "more equality". If it's that important to you, then go get your point heard there.

2buffagain:


It doesn't affect me one bit.
You people are the ones that says you want "more equality". If it's that important to you, then go get your point heard there.

well you are the one asking. And I rightfully figured you’re not interested in answer. Just looking for another feminist to disagree with :.

Glad I didn’t indulge you. Take care

cococandy:
well you are the one asking. And I rightfully figured you’re not interested in answer. Just looking for another feminist to disagree with :.

Glad I didn’t indulge you. Take care

Nah the fact is you made a statement about western society having a long way to go before women are given equal rights.

You were invited to a space to air your views on what you feel should change in "western" society equality wise.

You choose to weasel out of it, and with typical female flare, you then attempt to blame a man for making you weasel out of it.

The truth is you don't even know what you want to see change in said society. Content instead with the abstract, amorphously undefined status of self-acclaimed victimhood. And that's just standard feminist behavior.

Don't blame me for that. That's all you. Good day

Okay

2buffagain:


Nah the fact is you made a statement about western society having a long way to go before women are given equal rights.

You were invited to a space to air your views on what you feel should change in "western" society equality wise.

You choose to weasel out of it, and with typical female flare, you then attempt to blame a man for making you weasel out of it.

The truth is you don't even know what you want to see happen. And that's just standard feminist behavior.

Don't blame me for that. Good day

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Sorry no vex.i dnt know where ur anger is coming from.

Kingarthur21:
wailer,you can go hit your head on a tree..


I stand by my words that most naija girls are tasteles. Come and beat me for it

starrygal:
Sorry no vex.i dnt know where ur anger is coming from.

lol .who is vexing?you that quoted me??or me that said what I said

topsquino:


My account number to a woman who is likely to leave your ass when you are financially handicapped ? Can't believe a man with BALLS typed this. Chai.. Simping has reached another level.

Happy birthday bro. I hope the cake was bigger this year

MrToothBrush:

Happy birthday bro. I hope the cake was bigger this year

Thanks