It is our duty as men, fathers, and responsible citizens to counter these negative images and raise a new generation of men who are respectful, loving, and willing to contribute to society in a positive way.

If we are to achieve this goal, we must start with improving ourselves. The greatest compliment that a man can get from his daughter is “I want to marry someone just like you.” That kind of pressure forces you to examine your life and look for ways to improve.

Over the years, I’ve discovered seven traits that real men possess:

1. Integrity – Integrity is more than being honest. It’s a lifestyle set on striving towards moral excellence. Real men say what they mean and mean what they say. They are the same person whether or not others are watching. They are trustworthy, dependable, and unwavering.

2. Compassion – Compassion is sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress together with a desire to alleviate it. In other words, you feel compelled to help someone who is hurting. Men aren’t often viewed as being compassionate, but it is a trait that helps us to become more connected to the people around us. Real men turn their compassion into service and work to make the world a better place.

3. Confidence – Real men are confident. Many people confuse confidence with arrogance and self-centeredness. Real men know the difference. Confidence is about being self-assured and self-aware. Confident men have faith in their abilities and knowledge. They don’t need to tear others down in order to build themselves up. They earn people’s trust with their radiant, inner strength. When a they walk into the room, everyone takes notice.

4. Self-control – Hardly a day goes by without a news report about some high-profile man who has been destroyed by sex, money, and/or drugs. Too many men lack self-control, but it is the foundation of a virtuous life. Self-control starts with focus and ridding yourself of distractions. Doing this isn’t easy because temptations lurk around every corner. Real men are able to tame their desires and channel that energy into positive pursuits.

5. Perseverance – Perseverance is the product of self-control. It is courageous resistance against difficult circumstances. Perseverance is only developed through trials. Real men endure the trials and emerge stronger. They never give up.

6. Bravery – Bravery is the courage to do what is right regardless of the circumstances. Nothing is ever accomplished with an attitude of passivity. Real men stand up in the face of adversity.

7. Humility – Today’s breed of young men love to let everyone know how much swagger they have. They thump their chests and proclaim to the world, “I’m a Big Deal. Look at me!” Real men understand the value of being humble and letting someone else’s light shine. They realize that humility is more endearing than self-importance. Humility indicates that you are ridding yourself of the poison of self-centeredness. Besides, humility softens the blow when someone knocks you off your pedestal.

Acquiring all of these traits takes time and dedication. However, our society would benefit greatly if all men strove to possess them.

Stay Strong

Abeg he is a complete or real man when he's got a heavy weight in his pocket , that was omitted in your list OP

jennykadry:

Abeg he is not a complete or real man without a heavy weight in his pocket

So you'd rather settle for a man with a heavy pocket but lacks the traits listed above

v3:

So you'd rather settle for a man with a heavy pocket but lacks the traits listed above

I can manage

What I am trying to say is that list is very useless to me and incomplete if "that" real man cannot provide for his family. Na self confidence,integrity,compassion e.t.c me and my kids go chop all the rest of our lives?

You have to include

Receiving slaps at random from his wife on a daily basis while he turns the other cheek just like NL women want.

jennykadry:

I can manage

What I am trying to say is that list is very useless to me and incomplete if "that" real man cannot provide for his family. Na self confidence,integrity,compassion e.t.c me and my kids go chop all the rest of our lives?

Abeg help me ask them my sister!

dayokanu:

You have to include

Receiving slaps at random from his wife on a daily basis while he turns the other cheek just like NL women want.

Yea, that too!

dayokanu:

You have to include
Receiving slaps at random from his wife on a daily basis while he turns the other cheek just like NL women want.

No wonder Fools fall in love

v3:

No wonder Fools fall in love

Yea add that too . . .  a 'real' man's got to be a f[i]oo[/i]l! 

jennykadry:

Abeg he is a complete or real man when he's got a heavy weight in his pocket , that was omitted in your list OP

Jennykadry, when was the last time you saw a man  who was very persistent but couldn't provide for his family? Usually those who can't provide for their families are lazy and inconsistent.

Trust me; if a man has all the traits listed above, money will follow. Perseverance, confidence and integrity are ingredients to financial freedom and a good name.

Conversely, a man can inherit a load of cash but lose it all because he lacks the attributes listed above.

By the way, you remind me of what someone once told me "Without money, a man is not a man but a child." How truth is this?


TheCongo,

If there was Just 1 man with all these qualities!

@Thecongo

In a country like Nigeria,lots of men have got this qualities but with no kobo to their name due to hardship. Yes I have seen. My brother's best friend works twice as hard but eats like an ant. My brother on the other hand is someone who's always been favoured and really doesn't have to struggle much to get what he wants.

Lots of peeps have got those qualities but blessed with bad luck.

So yes I have seen men(both in nigeria and outside) with those qualities and no material/financial establishment to top it up with.

Missy ★ B:

If there was Just 1 man with all these qualities!

thats me

^^abeg go sitdon

jennykadry:



Lots of peeps have got those qualities but blessed with bad luck.

So yes I have seen men(both in nigeria and outside) with those qualities and no material/financial establishment to top it up with.

are you saying success comes from luck?

^^^^ask my wife she go tell you  

jennykadry:

@Thecongo

My brother's best friend works twice as hard but eats like an ant.

there's nothing on the list that said HARD WORK, so the fact that ur brother's friend works hard doesnt mean he has the 7 qualities listed above, being poor is as hard a work as being rich what counts are the other ingredients you put into the hard work

jennykadry:

@Thecongo

In a country like Nigeria,lots of men have got this qualities but with no kobo to their name due to hardship.


So yes I have seen men(both in nigeria and outside) with those qualities and no material/financial establishment to top it up with.

maybe u have seen a men with one, two or even three of the qualities listed but i can guarantee you have not seen a man with ALL seven qualities who is poor not even in a country like Sudan not to talk of Nigeria where there are countless opportunities to be rich

@V3 and TheCongo. . . DAYOKANU and JENKANDRY are right with their comments. Your post is great but not generally applicable to everyone. First of all, a lot of men (Nigerian men especially) possess these attributes and much more and still, they remain unsuccessful in business and relationships. There are guys who have excellent CV's and are jobless not becos they dont want 2 work but they cant get decent jobs. Or do you expect a banking and finance graduate with 2.1 to take up basket weaving or clean roads all becos he's jobless? Can u do it? Come on! I've a graduate in food and nutrition who chilled at home played xbox while his father worked out a heavy salary paying job for him in a multinational oil and gas company. He was barely interviewed meanwhile graduates with degrees in petrochemical engineering were being grilled unecessarily and denied their rightful jobs. Tell me, what has food and nutrition got to do with oil and gas? Sadly, thats how it is. Furthermore, a "real man" is always valued with his pocket and not necessarily his virtues. No matter what, you can NEVER call either Obasanjo,IBB or Bode George thieves if you meet them face 2 face. We all know they are thieves but we subconsiously respect them coz they've got mega billions in naira and dollars. Same applies with the average man. No money, no respect! On what DAYOKANU said, you have 2 admit that today's definition of "real men" has changed due to feminism. The definition of what a real man should be is determined by MEN and governed by the laws of chivalry which once again has been shot dead by feminists. For instance, hitting a woman is unchivalric becos men had NO reason to. Why? REAL WOMEN dont hit men and vice versa. When there is an anomaly, then it must corrected "instanta" e.g stomp the dumb biatch with your foot and piss on her afterwards. That's what REAL MEN do 2 misguided women. They work hard to return normalcy. It's not easy being a man.

@v3.While I strongly believe in your list I cant but point out the fact that its somewhat incomplete.I,hereby,attempt to include other virtues.






8.INTELLIGENCE.This means having a high mental ability and a good understanding of situations which of course has to be developed by said man.A real man should be able to use his brain to solve his and his family's problems.Intelligence isnt graduating with a first class and bemoaning your joblessness,its finding a way to earn a living (legally)paid employment or not, More to come.

harakiri:

    Obasanjo,IBB or Bode George thieves if you meet them face 2 face. We all know they are thieves but we subconsiously respect them coz they've got mega billions in naira and dollars. Same applies with the average man. No money, no respect!

   
   Nelson Mandela's humble little house in Soweto had become an interesting stopover attracting millions of visitors from around the globe. (Mandela lived in this house in the 50's).

   How many of those visitors will be keen to flock to Nigeria to visit Abacha or Obasanjo's million-dollar villa?

   But those visitors would be glad to pay a lot of money to touch Ghandy's pair of glasses which were counted among his only worldy possessions.

   What makes Mandela and Ghandi so special? The 7 traits of a real man.

   TheCongo

V3 is referring a qualities and values --- most women don't examine when seeking a man ---- MONEY IS NOt everything.

Values carry more weight than money.

harakiri:

@V3 and TheCongo. . . DAYOKANU and JENKANDRY are right with their comments. Your post is great but not generally applicable to everyone. First of all, a lot of men (Nigerian men especially) possess these attributes and much more and still, they remain unsuccessful in business and relationships. There are guys who have excellent CV's and are jobless not becos they dont want 2 work but they cant get decent jobs. Or do you expect a banking and finance graduate with 2.1 to take up basket weaving or clean roads all becos he's jobless? Can u do it? Come on! I've a graduate in food and nutrition who chilled at home played xbox while his father worked out a heavy salary paying job for him in a multinational oil and gas company. He was barely interviewed meanwhile graduates with degrees in petrochemical engineering were being grilled unecessarily and denied their rightful jobs. Tell me, what has food and nutrition got to do with oil and gas? Sadly, thats how it is. Furthermore, a "real man" is always valued with his pocket and not necessarily his virtues. No matter what, you can NEVER call either Obasanjo,IBB or Bode George thieves if you meet them face 2 face. We all know they are thieves but we subconsiously respect them coz they've got mega billions in naira and dollars. Same applies with the average man. No money, no respect! On what DAYOKANU said, you have 2 admit that today's definition of "real men" has changed due to feminism. The definition of what a real man should be is determined by MEN and governed by the laws of chivalry which once again has been shot dead by feminists. For instance, hitting a woman is unchivalric becos men had NO reason to. Why? REAL WOMEN dont hit men and vice versa. When there is an anomaly, then it must corrected "instanta" e.g stomp the dumb biatch with your foot and piss on her afterwards. That's what REAL MEN do 2 misguided women. They work hard to return normalcy. It's not easy being a man.

What else can I say

walcolm:

there's nothing on the list that said HARD WORK, so the fact that your brother's friend works hard doesnt mean he has the 7 qualities listed above,  being poor is as hard a work as being rich what counts are the other ingredients you put into the hard work

The more reason why I said that list isn't complete. A man who has got all those qualities and isn't hardworking is just a mere vegetable. Hardwork is the spice of life. Our parents struggled and worked hard to get us to where we are today.

Hardwork my friend is the experience of life you always refer to when you are trying to push someone who is stuck on the way show me a man who isn't hardworking and I will show you a man who will not rise if he falls

maybe u have seen a men with one, two or even three of the qualities listed but i can guarantee you have not seen a man with ALL seven qualities who is poor not even in a country like Sudan not to talk of Nigeria where there are countless opportunities to be rich

Please don't tell me what I have seen sir   alot of Men with those qualities are poor. Nigeria has got countless of opportunities yet alot of us leave Nigeria to other countries for greener pastures, nigeria has alot of opportunities and alot of first class graduates even PHD holders are walking around the streets with files in hand looking for jobs, yes so many oppotunities and we see alot of graduates earning 500 naira a day selling pure water in traffic or doing conductor work.

SO many opportunities indeed

.

walcolm:


maybe u have seen a men with one, two or even three of the qualities listed but i can guarantee you have not seen a man with ALL seven qualities who is poor not even in a country like Sudan not to talk of Nigeria where there are countless opportunities to be rich

I agree. No way for a man to be poor and have all those seven qualities.
And even if he was poor, believe me, I would not hesistate for one second to spend my whole life with him, cherish and respect him and give my all to him.
But still, don't believe such man can stay poor.

You all keep talking about diplomas, cvs, job opportunities -it's all important, but even with hard work and all these a man can stay poor.
Once you set yourself a goal and stick to it, don't get discouraged and are self-confident about what you want to achieve, your chances of being rich are very high.
I have interviewed many people who wanyted to get a job in my life, and believeme, a good cv isn't the most important thing an employer looks for.
It's the qualities that one posseses -that can be of course also shown on a cv -by the choice of past jobs, time spent in one company and achievements -all resulting from a list above.

obowunmi:

V3 is referring a qualities and values --- most women don't examine when seeking a man ---- MONEY IS NOt everything.

Values carry more weight than money.

True talk Obowunmi, but, by the time the man has no money to take care of the woman and her children, she will ask if na value den go chop?, i believe a man needs to possess all those values, add hardwork and rich pocket to it, This has nothing to do with gold-digging as some would claim, but just the truth.

This is all fine & dandy but I've seen these same 7 traits floating around the web for a few years now.

Are you sure, [b]you [/b]discovered what real men need to possess?

v3:

It is our duty as men, fathers, and responsible citizens to counter these negative images and raise a new generation of men who are respectful, loving, and willing to contribute to society in a positive way.

If we are to achieve this goal, we must start with improving ourselves. The greatest compliment that a man can get from his daughter is “I want to marry someone just like you.” That kind of pressure forces you to examine your life and look for ways to improve.

Over the years, I’ve discovered seven traits that real men possess:

   1. Integrity – Integrity is more than being honest. It’s a lifestyle set on striving towards moral excellence. Real men say what they mean and mean what they say. They are the same person whether or not others are watching. They are trustworthy, dependable, and unwavering.

   2. Compassion – Compassion is sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress together with a desire to alleviate it. In other words, you feel compelled to help someone who is hurting. Men aren’t often viewed as being compassionate, but it is a trait that helps us to become more connected to the people around us. Real men turn their compassion into service and work to make the world a better place.

   3. Confidence – Real men are confident. Many people confuse confidence with arrogance and self-centeredness. Real men know the difference. Confidence is about being self-assured and self-aware. Confident men have faith in their abilities and knowledge. They don’t need to tear others down in order to build themselves up. They earn people’s trust with their radiant, inner strength. When a they walk into the room, everyone takes notice.

   4. Self-control – Hardly a day goes by without a news report about some high-profile man who has been destroyed by sex, money, and/or drugs. Too many men lack self-control, but it is the foundation of a virtuous life. Self-control starts with focus and ridding yourself of distractions. Doing this isn’t easy because temptations lurk around every corner. Real men are able to tame their desires and channel that energy into positive pursuits.

   5. Perseverance – Perseverance is the product of self-control. It is courageous resistance against difficult circumstances. Perseverance is only developed through trials. Real men endure the trials and emerge stronger. They never give up.

   6. Bravery – Bravery is the courage to do what is right regardless of the circumstances. Nothing is ever accomplished with an attitude of passivity. Real men stand up in the face of adversity.

   7. Humility – Today’s breed of young men love to let everyone know how much swagger they have. They thump their chests and proclaim to the world, “I’m a Big Deal. Look at me!” Real men understand the value of being humble and letting someone else’s light shine. They realize that humility is more endearing than self-importance. Humility indicates that you are ridding yourself of the poison of self-centeredness. Besides, humility softens the blow when someone knocks you off your pedestal.

Acquiring all of these traits takes time and dedication. However, our society would benefit greatly if all men strove to possess them.

Stay Strong

fairy tale  a man with all these traits only exists in fairy tales
this kinda thing does not happen in real life, men with their over bloated egos will give excuses as to why they cannot posses these traits, so as not to appear to be a sissy or too dull

..

dayokanu:

You have to include

Receiving slaps at random from his wife on a daily basis while he turns the other cheek just like NL women want.

so you dont want your wife to slap your derriere on a daily basis?

Most of the men I roll with as friends possess all these traits and even more, though they are not perfect but at least possess these traits in great measure. 

tpia@:

so you dont want your wife to slap your derriere on a daily basis?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SMH
1. Integrity – Integrity is more than being honest. It’s a lifestyle set on striving towards moral excellence. Real men say what they mean and mean what they say. They are the same person whether or not others are watching. They are trustworthy, dependable, and unwavering.

2. Compassion – Compassion is sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress together with a desire to alleviate it. In other words, you feel compelled to help someone who is hurting. Men aren’t often viewed as being compassionate, but it is a trait that helps us to become more connected to the people around us. Real men turn their compassion into service and work to make the world a better place.

3. Confidence – Real men are confident. Many people confuse confidence with arrogance and self-centeredness. Real men know the difference. Confidence is about being self-assured and self-aware. Confident men have faith in their abilities and knowledge. They don’t need to tear others down in order to build themselves up. They earn people’s trust with their radiant, inner strength. When a they walk into the room, everyone takes notice.

4. Self-control – Hardly a day goes by without a news report about some high-profile man who has been destroyed by sex, money, and/or drugs. Too many men lack self-control, but it is the foundation of a virtuous life. Self-control starts with focus and ridding yourself of distractions. Doing this isn’t easy because temptations lurk around every corner. Real men are able to tame their desires and channel that energy into positive pursuits.

5. Perseverance – Perseverance is the product of self-control. It is courageous resistance against difficult circumstances. Perseverance is only developed through trials. Real men endure the trials and emerge stronger. They never give up.

6. Bravery – Bravery is the courage to do what is right regardless of the circumstances. Nothing is ever accomplished with an attitude of passivity. Real men stand up in the face of adversity.

7. Humility – Today’s breed of young men love to let everyone know how much swagger they have. They thump their chests and proclaim to the world, “I’m a Big Deal. Look at me!” Real men understand the value of being humble and letting someone else’s light shine. They realize that humility is more endearing than self-importance. Humility indicates that you are ridding yourself of the poison of self-centeredness. Besides, humility softens the blow when someone knocks you off your pedestal.

Men with all these intact are endangered species if not extinct. I do know of one man though. . .

firestar:


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SMH
1. Integrity – Integrity is more than being honest. It’s a lifestyle set on striving towards moral excellence. Real men say what they mean and mean what they say. They are the same person whether or not others are watching. They are trustworthy, dependable, and unwavering.

2. Compassion – Compassion is sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress together with a desire to alleviate it. In other words, you feel compelled to help someone who is hurting. Men aren’t often viewed as being compassionate, but it is a trait that helps us to become more connected to the people around us. Real men turn their compassion into service and work to make the world a better place.

3. Confidence – Real men are confident. Many people confuse confidence with arrogance and self-centeredness. Real men know the difference. Confidence is about being self-assured and self-aware. Confident men have faith in their abilities and knowledge. They don’t need to tear others down in order to build themselves up. They earn people’s trust with their radiant, inner strength. When a they walk into the room, everyone takes notice.

4. Self-control – Hardly a day goes by without a news report about some high-profile man who has been destroyed by sex, money, and/or drugs. Too many men lack self-control, but it is the foundation of a virtuous life. Self-control starts with focus and ridding yourself of distractions. Doing this isn’t easy because temptations lurk around every corner. Real men are able to tame their desires and channel that energy into positive pursuits.

5. Perseverance – Perseverance is the product of self-control. It is courageous resistance against difficult circumstances. Perseverance is only developed through trials. Real men endure the trials and emerge stronger. They never give up.

6. Bravery – Bravery is the courage to do what is right regardless of the circumstances. Nothing is ever accomplished with an attitude of passivity. Real men stand up in the face of adversity.

7. Humility – Today’s breed of young men love to let everyone know how much swagger they have. They thump their chests and proclaim to the world, “I’m a Big Deal. Look at me!” Real men understand the value of being humble and letting someone else’s light shine. They realize that humility is more endearing than self-importance. Humility indicates that you are ridding yourself of the poison of self-centeredness. Besides, humility softens the blow when someone knocks you off your pedestal.

Men with all these intact are endangered species if not extinct. I do know of one man though. . .

Me ^_^