Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong - Romance - Nairaland
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| Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by unbranded0029: 9:02pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
House, please read my story and tell me if am wrong or right. I am an employee with a meager salary. I do my best to help my fiancee with her undergraduate fees. Sometimes, to meet up with her financial requirements is very challenging to me, considering how small my own means of income is. But she alwez fail to understand that my support to her is out of luv. Rather, by virtue of her attitude, she usually insinuates it's my responsibility because if i do not exist in her life someone else who would pay all her bills would hav come to marry her. This is to some extent true because suitors hv bn coming 4 her. She's very pretty, faithful and lovely. But i can't do more than is possible with my earnings. I met her 6 yrs ago during my 100 level and talked her into furthering her education up to d university level. Since then, i hav alwez encouraged and supported her. But each time i don't meet up with her financially expectation, she gets emotionally affected and sometimes take it out on me in a way that pisses me off. Her parents are still alive, but are completely handicapped to render any form of help. With this atitude i feel quitting sometimes. I lov her so much and hv come this far to quit. Just 3 semesters to go and she would be done with skul and we will get married. Just few weeks ago, her skul fees for 300 level came, standing at a little above 100k. I put together 50k to support her, but because i didn't come up with d money sooner than she expected (u know salary payment and delays), she became angry and even dropped a call while i was going to tell her d money was ready. Days later, she called and did not bother to apologise or tell me why she did that. Now am so furious that i have decided to keep my money. Let her go sort herself out with those she believe can pay promptly. I am quitting. Thought not easy 4 me. She has been in my head 2 weeks now. But i am sure i will survive it, perhaps take my lov and effort to somewhere it can be appreciated. She wil blame me b4 family and friends on why it crashed, but i don't care. Guys if u think my decision is out of line, please advise. Thanks 3 Likes |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Killz3(m): 9:05pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
That's harsh dude. . . You've started it already, why not finish it? |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by slimyem: 9:17pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
you gf is an ungrateful biatch! You dont do your own...make she go find way herself! And yes,take your love and affection to where it'll better appreciated! 1 Like |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Roland17(m): 9:17pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
Its a pity many unfortunate dating men/women are still caged with financial responsibilities of their partners. just because she is pretty, faithful and lovely is not enough to make you her foster father before marriage  , relationships are supposed to be mature, mutual and still maintain some level of independence, she not a baby, she can get a good part time job to support herself..What if you get physically handicapped, what happens? what if for some reasons you are no longer able to provide for her financially, what happens to you? YOUR LOVE FOR HER IS FOUNDED ON GENUINE AND SINCERE FEELINGS, WHILE HER'S IS GROUNDED ON THE FACT THAT YOU ARE HER OFFICE, HER ATM AND CREDIT CARD THAT MUST ALWAYS PAY HER BILLS.. PAYING HER BILLS DETERMINES HOW SHE TREATS YOU, IF YOU ARE DOING WELL SHE TREATS YOU FINE, BUT IF YOU DON'T SHE TREATS YOU WITH DISGUST.. 2 Likes |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by doeeyed: 9:21pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
Bros, Abeg softly, softly, little immature she appears. ........... Vocalizing bout her offering her affections to the highest bidder. Are u aware of any of her mentors who can relate your difficulties n attempts to overcome them to her  BTW, is it set in stone, she will marry you Her affections seem rather fickle at times. :-( |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Metalgoong(m): 9:28pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
I weep for my Nigerian brothers!! . . . You guys suffer a lot in name of girls. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Nobody: 9:30pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
unbranded0029: House, please read my story and tell me if am wrong or right. I am an employee with a meager salary. I do my best to help my fiancee with her undergraduate fees. Sometimes, to meet up with her financial requirements is very challenging to me, considering how small my own means of income is. But she alwez fail to understand that my support to her is out of luv. Rather, by virtue of her attitude, she usually insinuates it's my responsibility because if i do not exist in her life someone else who would pay all her bills would hav come to marry her. This is to some extent true because suitors hv bn coming 4 her. She's very pretty, faithful and lovely. But i can't do more than is possible with my earnings. I met her 6 yrs ago during my 100 level and talked her into furthering her education up to d university level. Since then, i hav alwez encouraged and supported her. But each time i don't meet up with her financially expectation, she gets emotionally affected and sometimes take it out on me in a way that pisses me off. Her parents are still alive, but are completely handicapped to render any form of help. With this atitude i feel quitting sometimes. I lov her so much and hv come this far to quit. Just 3 semesters to go and she would be done with skul and we will get married. Just few weeks ago, her skul fees for 300 level came, standing at a little above 100k. I put together 50k to support her, but because i didn't come up with d money sooner than she expected (u know salary payment and delays), she became angry and even dropped a call while i was going to tell her d money was ready. Days later, she called and did not bother to apologise or tell me why she did that. Now am so furious that i have decided to keep my money. Let her go sort herself out with those she believe can pay promptly. I am quitting. Thought not easy 4 me. She has been in my head 2 weeks now. But i am sure i will survive it, perhaps take my lov and effort to somewhere it can be appreciated. She wil blame me b4 family and friends on why it crashed, but i don't care. Guys if u think my decision is out of line, please advise. Thanks@OP. No be u advice her say make she go school If her parents where capable, she would be in school. Now you talked her back into going in school and now you are complaining of financial responsibilities which you know it would lead to. You didn't think of you poor salary from the onset. You wanted to show you were capable and now you got stuck on the road and you are here complaining s.c.u.m.b.a.g. Why didn't you think of your pocket at the beginning of the relationship. Improper planning na hin go finish you. After spending you hard earned money on her, you want to leave her stranded. Yeye man, oloshi oloriburuku. Her kitty don tire u abi mtcheeeeew! Idiot. Fool, baga, were, you beta don't type sh1t here again d.e.l.u.d.e.d dickson. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by cowgurl: 9:46pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
A sad tale indeed. 'l suggest u v a chat wit er for d last tym b4 u tak dat decision of urs. Watch out 4 er verbal n non verbal cues yle talkin wit er, if u ain't convinced bro, DO TAKE A HIKE! But 2 b frank wit u, I rili can't shake out d feelin she's gat som dude lurkin around. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by unbranded0029: 9:49pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
Roland, Slimyem, Killz thanks so much 4 ur takes. Doe-eyed, i don't have any of such relative of hers to take d matter to. The first time i tried it, though we settled, she frowned at it. This has bn her way since we began to think we belong to each other. Am not scared of today. Am only worried hw i can cope with that in marriage that is full of ups and downs. Again, its not as if we must marry. But we, our families and friends do not believ otherwise. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by omosexy1: 9:57pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
Guy you dey drink OMO oh..... are you the father? Are there no relatives? Honestly you can quote me that girl will finally dump you. She is using you to gain an education and once she is done, she will move on to a guy who is more financially buoyant than you. She feels her beautiful is a money exchange business. Rather than be a sorry A$$ in the future you better stop now. If you think sponsoring her education would land you a marriage certificate I feel sorry for you. Stop to dey drink OMO this man |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Killz3(m): 10:03pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
unbranded0029: Roland, Slimyem, Killz thanks so much 4 ur takes. Doe-eyed, i don't have any of such relative of hers to take d matter to. The first time i tried it, though we settled, she frowned at it. This has bn her way since we began to think we belong to each other. Am not scared of today. Am only worried hw i can cope with that in marriage that is full of ups and downs. Again, its not as if we must marry. But we, our families and friends do not believ otherwise.Look, you have strong feelings for her. No matter what, you leaving her at this stage may have adverse affects on you. I think you should really talk to her, and express your fears to her. Marriage is in the works, so be sure of what you are doing, and if it will not be favorable, you know what to do, but at this stage, i won't support you taking harsh decisions just because you can mehn. . . That's a no no. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by unbranded0029: 10:09pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
Omosexy1, Cowgurl, bennyraz thanks a lot. Points noted. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by khukhi(f): 10:23pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
You've invested so much in this relationship.  I really do feel for you. Either way it may not be a win-win situation cause what if she changes after graduating ...what will you do? And what if you leave her now... .after all the effort to make a better life for y'll as a couple,then you'll have to start over. Maybe you should have a serious talk with her and find out if she really loves you with or without your money. The last thing you need is a primadonna for the rest of your life. You'll be choosing a life of misery. Money's a serious issue and relationships based on money often end badly. ... Goodluck  |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Nobody: 10:38pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
what part is she playing herself to help out in securing funds from the way i see it, if another guy comes and can handle the task its goodbye for you, its no one's fault to have their present financial status however, its sad when you're killing yourself to help out your partner and she can't recognize that effort, anyway like i said every relationships takes one of the partner for granted till the partner leaves, left tome you can move on, love is just a feeling ,and its not absolute you can move on easily if you want to, but you can also talk to her also. take care |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by acidtalk: 10:57pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
unbranded0029: House, please read my story and tell me if am wrong or right. I am an employee with a meager salary. I do my best to help my fiancee with her undergraduate fees. Sometimes, to meet up with her financial requirements is very challenging to me, considering how small my own means of income is. But she alwez fail to understand that my support to her is out of luv. Rather, by virtue of her attitude, she usually insinuates it's my responsibility because if i do not exist in her life someone else who would pay all her bills would hav come to marry her. This is to some extent true because suitors hv bn coming 4 her. She's very pretty, faithful and lovely. But i can't do more than is possible with my earnings. I met her 6 yrs ago during my 100 level and talked her into furthering her education up to d university level. Since then, i hav alwez encouraged and supported her. But each time i don't meet up with her financially expectation, she gets emotionally affected and sometimes take it out on me in a way that pisses me off. Her parents are still alive, but are completely handicapped to render any form of help. With this atitude i feel quitting sometimes. I lov her so much and hv come this far to quit. Just 3 semesters to go and she would be done with skul and we will get married. Just few weeks ago, her skul fees for 300 level came, standing at a little above 100k. I put together 50k to support her, but because i didn't come up with d money sooner than she expected (u know salary payment and delays), she became angry and even dropped a call while i was going to tell her d money was ready. Days later, she called and did not bother to apologise or tell me why she did that. Now am so furious that i have decided to keep my money. Let her go sort herself out with those she believe can pay promptly. I am quitting. Thought not easy 4 me. She has been in my head 2 weeks now. But i am sure i will survive it, perhaps take my lov and effort to somewhere it can be appreciated. She wil blame me b4 family and friends on why it crashed, but i don't care. Guys if u think my decision is out of line, please advise. Thanks Never knew CRACK HEADS like you still exist Whcih sane man still trains a girlfriend through school (only permitted for a wife) Women are known to be extremely ungrateful to such gestures. dont be surprised if she calls it quick with you the very day she rights her final papers. That money would have been of immense benefit if you had trained a total stranger |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Nobody: 10:59pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
unbranded0029: Omosexy1, Cowgurl, bennyraz thanks a lot. Points noted.i was angry when i saw your post. Really am a type of person that hates to spend money & i see d money wash down the drains. Its painful though & i share your pains. Never make money the base or backbone of your relationship. If theres no money again, the relationship will cripple. Honestly, i'm sorry for the way i lashed out at you in my first post. I just hate it when i waste money. Now, you breaking up with her only means you've lost and if you don't you might still loose her to trends of the world. You've just furnished her for another man. You started and you can't finish. What a pity! Now she feels her love for you depends on your money. Guy, you are on a time bomb! |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Elemental(m): 11:14pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
Mehn I feel for u. Kai... this is paining me |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by tpm(m): 11:46pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
My appreciation to ALL of u. Bennyraz it's ok, u made a lot of sense. For me, d past is 4gotten. Whatever i did 4 her does not pain me as much as d fear of facing this same thing in d future if by luck i get married to her. I can easily put all behind me. But i won't 4give myself if in d future, this attitude continues, knowing fully well i had a chance to nip it in d bud before. Once again, 4 d sake of love, it won't hurt me that much. U neva know except u experience how difficult life can be with a difficult wife. I hav learnt wisdom from u all. Best regards! |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by dokunbam(m): 11:59pm On Apr 19, 2012 |
Guy the issue of moni been the bases of the relationship has already been established. Even if you get married to her the problem will still continue if u cannot meet her needs. Pls wise up before its to late. I could get worse in marriage. Don't do what you will regret later. Do something now before its to late. Most Ladies are always ungrateful( the real one are rare |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by zuzuki: 8:59am On Apr 20, 2012 |
@ poster! Dude I really like ur person, u̶̲̥̅̊ ar such a good guy , advising her in d right direction(_getting educated) and bankrolling her education in tertiary institution in d present Nigeria. I giv u̶̲̥̅̊ kudos! But as regards her attitude and her being vocal abt other higher bidder somwhere dt can easily take ur place should u̶̲̥̅̊ default........... Bro I fink u̶̲̥̅̊ don't need to read btw d lines to get d picture. Fact is she has her mind on those HER acclaimed "bigger wallets" and u̶̲̥̅̊ ar @ d moment, a means to an end or her Visa to get through with her Education ....and after dt ur record is closed for good and a new Era begins in her life. because if u̶̲̥̅̊ can't Control her while dating and financing her education, u̶̲̥̅̊ don't u̶̲̥̅̊ don't need a soothsayer to tell u̶̲̥̅̊ dt ur marriage to her (if it happens @ all) will be built on a cliff edge of a rocky waterfalls! My advise for u̶̲̥̅̊ is to take to ur heels while u̶̲̥̅̊ can still do. BUT d good work u̶̲̥̅̊ started in her life must not be left to destruction, I know u̶̲̥̅̊ ar a good guy , if it is 10k or more/less try send to her @ ur convenience periodically so she won't hav to drop out of school , but dt won't be under duress or compulsion like d one u̶̲̥̅̊ ar doing @ d moment and God will reward u̶̲̥̅̊ for dt! I wish u̶̲̥̅̊ best of luck in ur search for real and true L♥√ع built on mutual reciprocity cos u̶̲̥̅̊ deserve it! |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Arosa(m): 9:37am On Apr 20, 2012 |
Beware of ungrateful gold diggers, they can kill you for money. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by kpolli(m): 10:39am On Apr 20, 2012 |
Dump her, cos she wud prolly leave u when she is thru with skool. . . She is too ungrateful |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Nobody: 11:40am On Apr 20, 2012 |
..women are unpredictable. You have to talk sense into her.. In fact it's a mistake, and would always be training a girl. I have been there and mine ended badly. But in my own case..I was financially bouyant. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by beylinko(m): 2:25pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
It's a pity dis relationship is goin dis way. She might has wel be telin people she is putin up wit u out of pity.U r definately a gud guy,pls cal her n hv a heart2heart discusion. Let her no d feelings u hv 4 her is nt based on ur investments on her,let her no ur luv is genuine dat if she doesnt want 2 conthnue u wont feel bad(dat wat u said) |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Nobody: 2:33pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
This girl is ungrateful from the story you have told us but i know we humans we all have our faults. Tell her you will not tolerate her ungrateful attitude and give her this last chance. If she persists with her ungrateful attitude please kick her out of your life. No dulling jor. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Nobody: 4:34pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
OP, that babe has left u, someone somewhere is thrillin her with some lies and now u are an alternative forgone(opportunity cost) .just get up, dust us a$$, put ur poker dot on ur shoulder, put ur shoes on, and hit the road. . . . |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by maclatunji: 4:58pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
You made a mistake, if you had married her by now you would be investing in your wife not a girlfriend that you now want to leave. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Nobody: 9:24pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
unbranded0029: House, please read my story and tell me if am wrong or right. I am an employee with a meager salary. I do my best to help my fiancee with her undergraduate fees. Sometimes, to meet up with her financial requirements is very challenging to me, considering how small my own means of income is. But she alwez fail to understand that my support to her is out of luv. Rather, by virtue of her attitude, she usually insinuates it's my responsibility because if i do not exist in her life someone else who would pay all her bills would hav come to marry her. This is to some extent true because suitors hv bn coming 4 her. She's very pretty, faithful and lovely. But i can't do more than is possible with my earnings. I met her 6 yrs ago during my 100 level and talked her into furthering her education up to d university level. Since then, i hav alwez encouraged and supported her. But each time i don't meet up with her financially expectation, she gets emotionally affected and sometimes take it out on me in a way that pisses me off. Her parents are still alive, but are completely handicapped to render any form of help. With this atitude i feel quitting sometimes. I lov her so much and hv come this far to quit. Just 3 semesters to go and she would be done with skul and we will get married. Just few weeks ago, her skul fees for 300 level came, standing at a little above 100k. I put together 50k to support her, but because i didn't come up with d money sooner than she expected (u know salary payment and delays), she became angry and even dropped a call while i was going to tell her d money was ready. Days later, she called and did not bother to apologise or tell me why she did that. Now am so furious that i have decided to keep my money. Let her go sort herself out with those she believe can pay promptly. I am quitting. Thought not easy 4 me. She has been in my head 2 weeks now. But i am sure i will survive it, perhaps take my lov and effort to somewhere it can be appreciated. She wil blame me b4 family and friends on why it crashed, but i don't care. Guys if u think my decision is out of line, please advise. ThanksNwa nne m your head is dia. This is just the beginning, it is kinds of women that go and straff men outside marriage all to gather money for gold necklaces. She hasn't even considered your EFFORTS haba, that is ungratefulness and wickedness. And a piece of advice, in the future when women start comparing you o other men it's best to excuse yyourself from that arrangement. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Nobody: 9:42pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
@Unbranded, I take God beg you: LEAVE THAT GIRL ALONE O hehn hehn!!! The chic is one chance, even if you marry this one you will NEVER have a happy life. And I am talking from first hand experience here, people dont change in marriage infact you'd be surprised how those things you initially regarded as trivial will get amplification and cause fights how much more things that didnt even like from the word go. Brother from the bottom of my heart I beg you leave this girl for your sanity's sake, she is not worth recharge card even. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by agreene: 10:21pm On Apr 20, 2012 |
It is disappointing that you are going through such turmoil. She is a grown woman so she need take on her own independence and stop taking advantage of you. I predict it will only get worse when you're married. I am sure there are many guys she can find to do the same but believe me it will only last momentarily. If she truly loves you she will understand. She is selfish and ungrateful so I will give her space. You have convinced her that it is all about her. Sometimes woman use their beauty to get what they want . You're making the right choice by keeping your money. I live in the states. I work full time and attend college for Computer Science & Art full time as well. It is definitely nice to be spoiled but I spoil my own self as well. There is nothing like making your own money and spending it. No ones money spends like your own. I wish you all the best. --Mannie P.S. Much love From The States (ATLANTA) |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by PrettyCindy(f): 1:09pm On Apr 21, 2012 |
Believe me its only God that will bless you for your good deed. My only issue here is the fact that she practically threatens you and reminds you that you are a kind of stumbling block otherwise she would have gone to meet the highest bidder. Why don't you have a heartfelt chat with her, you must really love her for you to be investing all your earnings into her life. Discuss with her, study her and try to find some clues to know if she is already unto another guy. Let her know you are really trying and she should be more understanding. You try sha. |
| Re: Someone Please Tell Me Am Wrong by Datfineboy: 3:36pm On Apr 21, 2012 |
Dats y am tryin nt 2 b a good guy cos girls dnt apreciate gud guys... Bro ur in 2 deep, BT i knw 1 tin-IF A LADY LUVS U,SHE NO GO C U AS AN ALTERNATIVE...use ur head evn though u have bn usin ur heart. Luv s crazyDats y am tryin nt 2 b a good guy cos girls dnt apreciate gud guys... Bro ur in 2 deep, BT i knw 1 tin-IF A LADY LUVS U,SHE NO GO C U AS AN ALTERNATIVE...use ur head evn though u have bn usin ur heart. Luv s crazyDats y am tryin nt 2 b a good guy cos girls dnt apreciate gud guys... Bro ur in 2 deep, BT i knw 1 tin-IF A LADY LUVS U,SHE NO GO C U AS AN ALTERNATIVE...use ur head evn though u have bn usin ur heart. Luv s crazy |
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