Iam in a go slow, i will call u back later.

@op
Nepa haff bring light
Na so e con happen o
Body dey scratch me
Why u stone me dis book?

Shoot bird, en mama fly.

You are a person

ginger the swagger

Wan, Toooo, Tiri,....

it is already ready

have u seen what u have done, SHIEE?

ABI u have lost my wrist watch?

OYA talk one after the other...

SHEBI u have money to buy condom but can't FIT buy me panadol extra?

Mummy, I'm AFRAIDING to go outside in the night because she knows I am a FEARING person.

Your face looks familiar have we met on facebbok?

he be like say dey are fearing us
why u no pick my call bah
wetin concern him
rain is beating us
i wan go pupu
i dey finsih i dey test am

whata pun - what happened.
Dress go back- move back
i like am
you nko.

Where is mummy? ~ THEY ARE in the kitchen.

Cacham!

Abeg Free me jo!

Abeg Touchlight the matter - Investigate.

men dis oyel rice make brain. see as e dey make sleep cash me

Hunger dey wire me - am hungry
Abeg, carry waka -please,walk away

CUT YOUR HAND! (Turn ur car steering left or right to the fullest)

Jakumo: "Tokunbo " = Equipment or vehicles previously used by a white man in a genteel, civilized manner.

"Fairly Used" = Anything mis-used by a Nigerian, well past the point of diminishing returns.

"Voga-Naiza" = Tire Shop

"Main and Mental Borris" = Engine Bearings for the Crankshaft, and for the Pistons.

"Packing" = All oil seals that are replaced along with the cylnder-head gasket of an engine.

" How for weekend ? " = Hand over some of the money in your car, or I might accidentally shoot you with my service weapon.

" We no dey here to count bridge " = I know you are hiding some cash in this car, so this is your last warning to pay up.

" Hear smell" = To percieve odor

" Hear language" = To be fluent in speaking and understanding a given language.

" Hear Word" = To understand and respond appropriately to advice

" Small-small " = In moderation

" Well-well " = In excess and with NO moderation

"Toto dey hungry me to chook " = I would very much like to share some carnal knowledge with a woman at this time.

" E get as e be" = That is a stupid question to which I have no reply.

.na dictionary be dis abi wetin?

"be goin,am coming","anty come and tell him o"

Happy Bayiday!

Her payint is showing!

Just collect your kwali from that school

It is absolutely not my consign!

Your food is sweet o!
It is turning my head!

NEPA has carried the light

Trafficate to the right!

Please, your inner light!

The police averted a bomb blast by detonating it on time

They are threatening to struck anytime!

We are on our normal parole.

. . . like a market woman.

Please axe if it was I.

Check the pump whether water is coming

ebamma: tell me u did not copy this from naija rocks facebook page

it doesn't matter,teju babyface also copy jokes form onlinenigeria.com

Leave that talk if u ask me na who i go ask.

A u boy, bring washing hand water, I wan chop.

Guy i will control you

I am hungry, who carry u come.

He shook me with biro
Pls help me reverse back
I am feeling worster than before
Thanks you very much
Give me my biro pen
Dress for me
Is the iced water cold?
She is a choir

kukuma bring am come

iluvnaija: MADE IN NIGERIA ENGLISH.
*ABEG DRESS BACK.
*If I hear pim, u go hear weeen.
*Have they BROUGHT light?
*The FILM is SWEET
*Pls help me SLOW that fan
*Mummy HAVE come
*I'll tell my daddy FOR YOU
*Have you paid your school fees money?
*See as you BAFF up
*Put the bread inside LYLON
*I strong KAKARAKA
*Oya come and be going
*I KUKUMA don't have your time
*Shebi you have BB charger
*See how her eye is entering my food
*Did you see the sound of my ringtone?
*I know you have come since bcoz I hear
your perfume.
Oya add your own ...

This post has just shown me that u never know who is behind the screen on nairaland! This is exactly what i formed and 'broadcast' on BBM! The poster must be among my contacts! Op inbox here let me know who u are? I will inbox wo i am too

We just started a new section. (session)

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the vulcanizer nor come work today,
na so we go dey dey,
e get as e be,
park well,
dont carry last

My cousin sister.