Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?

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Nairaland Forum  |  General Discussion  |  Romance (Moderators: mukina2, iice)  |  Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
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Author Topic: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?  (Read 3959 views)
Outkast (f)
Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« on: December 08, 2005, 05:19 PM »

I'm not sure if this has been discussed before but..het

A man asks a woman out and she accepts. He ends up taking her on a date. They go to a fancy restaurant.They have fun eating and generally enjoying eachother's company. Then the bill comes. He turns to her and says
"So how are we going to settle this?"
The woman is surprised and gives him her credit card, she tells him to do what he feels is right. She excuses herself and goes to the bathroom. Her date ends up using her credit card to pay for everything and she never goes out with him again.

My question is:
1) On a date who pays? Does this only apply to a first date?
2) Do you believe in going "dutch"
3) What happened to the line "I'm Miss Independent"?
IAH (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #1 on: December 08, 2005, 08:12 PM »

The person who asked the other person out should normally be ready to pay. Could be the boy or the girl but whoever came up with the suggestion should pay.
That reminds of one incident where someone took my friend out on a date. After they finished eating and time came to pay the bills, the guy dusted his wallet and was unable to pay the whole amount! Thank God my girl was holding some money, maybe she would have had to drop her shoes or wrist-watch as collateral. Grin Grin Hahahaha! When she gave us the gist, we were just laughing at her...how can you go out with suffer-head boy like that? I'm sure he's never been to such a restaurant, he didn't know the bills would be that high, he thought it's Mama-put's buka. Hehehehe! Cheesy Cheesy
Oracle (m)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #2 on: December 09, 2005, 12:02 AM »

Quote
The person who asked the other person out should normally be ready to pay
Yeah thatz right
im surprised to hear that the man asked her out and asked her to pay the bill
thatz ridiculous
he's an incompetent looser.


* dinner_date.jpg (12.69 KB, 250x237 )
enchantra (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #3 on: December 09, 2005, 12:33 PM »

1) On a date who pays? Does this only apply to a first date? : The askee pays!!! but sometimes when a woman wants to show
her indepence, she might pay - with an implied msg saying at this point in my life, you can't really do anything for me. Not even buying me a damn dinner.
And thats saying something!!!!
sweetme (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #4 on: December 10, 2005, 01:31 AM »

 Shocked i can't believe that guy asked her to pay that is just very bad of him...she was even nice enough to give him her card to pay if i was d one i would just walk(unless i have extra cash to spare).

i think the person askin someone out should pay and on subsequent dates when they become more familiar with each other they can now decide if they split the bills or watever... Smiley
christyne (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #5 on: December 10, 2005, 12:33 PM »

The ''askee'' as enchantra has said should be d one to pay.
sweetnini (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #6 on: December 11, 2005, 04:25 AM »

where i stay it's pay for yourself  if they ask u out be ready to pay ooo if not u'll disgrace yourself
but we foreigners are different

back to the topic
i think a guy should pay
sweetme (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #7 on: December 11, 2005, 01:44 PM »

@sweetnini....if  i may ask where do u stay Smiley
sweetnini (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #8 on: December 11, 2005, 02:25 PM »

planet mars  Smiley
bagoma (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #9 on: December 11, 2005, 08:57 PM »

@ sweetnini
 Grin Grin
icingbaby (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #10 on: December 12, 2005, 01:41 AM »

the person who ask the otherone out.
all the date i have ever been, i have never pay for it. Smiley
christyne (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #11 on: December 13, 2005, 10:19 AM »

Although, the person that ask one out should pay but in a situation where a lady asks a guy out,if d guy is man enough,he should be d one to pay.
otokx (m)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #12 on: December 13, 2005, 10:31 AM »

@christine "what do u mean by man enough?" the lady should pay the cash and if the man offers to then OK...
snazzydawn (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #13 on: December 13, 2005, 10:36 AM »

of because the askee pays de bills.When I call my sweetheart for lunch,I pay the bills.(oh sorry,forgot to tell you all,I have a sweetheart.wish me luck)
Terry1 (m)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #14 on: December 13, 2005, 10:42 AM »

all the luck snazzydawn, i think its the askee that pays the bill here,
but sometimes it depends u know..... Tongue
Outkast (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #15 on: December 13, 2005, 03:00 PM »

hello terry1 welcome to nairaland.
depends on what?
disney (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #16 on: December 13, 2005, 04:17 PM »

In nigerian culture, the man should pay and must pay whether he likes it or now if not girl go run ooooooooo .

In oyinbo culture, the man or the woman can pay..thats the way their culture works.

But to me, l think it doesn't really matter as long as you have mutual understanding that shoudn't be an issue.
mckaycee (m)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #17 on: December 14, 2005, 03:24 PM »

This topic made me remember what happened to a good friend of mine the other day.
It was just on a good sunday evening and he had gone to his Uncle's to collect some cash from him, unfortunately, the uncle travelled and he had only his transport fare back home.
At the bustop, he came across this babe he's been disturbing for long. At the bus stop, she took him to a fine joint nearby.
The guy was surprised because the girl has been playing hard- to- get for a very long time. Meanwhile at the joint, this babe ordered for two plates of pepper soup and two bottles of Gordon spark(a brand by Guiness). They finished it and she ordered and ordered till they took three bottles apiece.
when it was time to pay the bill, the girl shifted it to the guy and being the guy he is, he told her the plain truth about his condition then.
Later, the girl paid and said some nonsense then walked out on my guy.In fact, she humiliated my guy so much that his whole evening messed up.
 
I think babes should help out if the guy can't. But if non of them can't even after pulling their resources together, then gbese don gazz! 
Banderas (m)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #18 on: December 14, 2005, 06:25 PM »

If I invite a babe out for a date, I make sure I hold enough money to pay. The first time I invited a babe out for a date (oceanview) I held 50K. If the girl now decides to pay half, then it's a different question.

Even here in the UK where everyone goes dutch, I tend to make sure we all know I can't afford to pay for everyone. I must confess that back in Naija, it became a slight turnoff to me that women were always expecting me to pay their bills. Even when they initiated the date. I once was in a position where a babe asked me to go with her on a dinner date, chose the restaurant (Imperial chinese, I told her I preferred Biggs) and then when I asked who was paying the bill, she said I was cheap. I had to tell her that if I was cheap, then she was a freeloader. The dinner never held.
Soulful (m)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #19 on: December 14, 2005, 06:37 PM »

I'm old and old fashioned......

The man always pays unless the woman initiates the date and says AT THE TIME OF ASKING that she is taking care of it NOT when it is time to pay...

Come on guys....lets be men!!
Banderas (m)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #20 on: December 14, 2005, 06:44 PM »

Hello Soulful, your post smacks of a slight amount of prejudice. I tend to be more liberated, to the extent that I'm almost a feminist, even though I'm male. Apart from some physical attributes and abilities, I don't think women are different from men. I have met intelligent women that absolutely humbled me, yet I am known as quite an intelligent person. It has nothing to do with being a man my brother. I always encourage women to be all they can do, and play larger roles in the society. I have no problems with a woman paying for dinner, in the same way that I have no problems paying the bills when I eat out with a woman. I simply don't see why it is my responsibility "as a man". What am I, a walking wallet? A talking credit card??
Barry Boy
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #21 on: December 14, 2005, 08:29 PM »

The both of them where suppose to pay their bills because the both of them enjoyed themselves very well the girl enjoys it most.... so she suppose pay pass the guy...Abi na lie my fellow brothers?
nana (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #22 on: December 15, 2005, 12:05 AM »

Quote from: Barry Boy on December 14, 2005, 08:29 PM
The both of them where suppose to pay their bills because the both of them enjoyed themselves very well the girl enjoys it most.... so she suppose pay pass the guy...Abi na lie my fellow brothers?
Barry,You lie no be small.
Why not read d storyline before concluding?
Fumi (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #23 on: December 15, 2005, 01:36 AM »

Hi,

i want to give you a little example of what im seeing here in Germany.

If a Man invites a Lady for Dinner - he pays. But only at the first date. Later both can pay.

If a Woman tells you (at your first date), that she is paying her own food herself - you never see her again  Grin

greetz

fumi
Seun (m)
temp
« #24 on: December 15, 2005, 02:38 AM »

temp
WesleyanA (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #25 on: December 15, 2005, 03:33 AM »

whoever asks the other person out pays.
if the guy asks the girl out, he pays. . . but she could pay sometimes if they really know each other well.
if the girl asks the guy out, she pays!. and of course except maybe if they    really know each. . . . . . .. yeah.
larger_20 (m)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #26 on: December 15, 2005, 03:45 AM »

Whoever asked out should not pay becasue for you to agree on the request means you are as well intrested in the person that asked you out unless you play mind games which many nigerian girls tends to do.  Well it really depends.Let me give u an example.....

I have known this girl in my school for like three years..so latley I decided to ask her out on a date...we went to a resturant..and did our thing...when the bill came..I wanted to pay for her but she paid her part. I paid my too after all I see in school everyday and concidering we r both students..it does not worth it..

Well the case is diffrent if I was a full working graduate and go out with a student, I will pay for our both meals....

If we r both full working graduates, and I know you and see you around all the time, on the first date, it makes sense that we pay our own way....

In summary, if the level of mans intergrity(including money) is equal or relativley the same with a womans intergrity, both should pay their own way unless,

- Either party voluntary decide to pay for the other...
- If payment will not cause a problem to either parties account
- If the two have similar go go personality (not looking deep into things which I have myself like asking if i am surporse to pay)



K2DaC (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #27 on: December 15, 2005, 03:46 AM »

the guy of course
Txlonghorn (m)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #28 on: December 15, 2005, 03:47 AM »

Quit looking for a reason to be cheap my African brother, if you are nice enough to take a girl out on a date, paying for dinner should never be an issue. Cheesy
WesleyanA (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #29 on: December 15, 2005, 03:48 AM »

Quote from: Txlonghorn on December 15, 2005, 03:47 AM
Quit looking for a reason to be cheap my African brother, if you are nice enough to take a girl out on a date, paying for dinner should never be an issue. Cheesy

it can be sometimes  Cheesy and there's nothing one can do about it. .
besides, they've known each other for three years  Wink
larger_20 (m)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #30 on: December 15, 2005, 03:50 AM »

in law black can be white......it does not always sound right because majority does things in a particular way...let me write your consititution Cheesy
Tollababe (f)
Re: Man or Woman, Who Should Pay on a Restaurant Date?
« #31 on: December 15, 2005, 04:21 AM »

In most countries  say US for example,  each person pays his or her bill as sweetme said.. 

but in the real sense,  a man should still be man enough to foot the bill.

Though I really wouldn't mind paying my bill.. 
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