A lady who isn’t contributing financially to her wedding shouldn’t be dragging opinions which money is so much involved with you.I think you caused this whole thing because you shouldn’t planned to even marry a who can’t contribute Atleast 500k to her wedding in the first place bros this is so simple tell her to pay 30 percent of the budget fees if she insisted on doing both home and away kind of wedding

janvier27:
There are ways you can talk to her and get her consent. You need not tell her it's your mom's idea.

That is why it went ballistic between them on the phone call

I will tell you what nobody is willing to say.....

Run oooooooooo



Run �‍♀️�‍♀️�‍♀️�‍♀️�‍♀️�‍♀️�‍♀️�‍♀️�‍♀️ ooooo

It is of utmost importance that a man should marry a reasonable wife. Even if u have money doesn’t mean u should be reckless with it just to please people or get unnecessary hype.

Maybe you aren’t carrying her along the way you should. Your wife too be should have more say than your mother because it’s her wedding. You guys need to agree

Sickmod:
Awaiting corper?

Best of luck guy

That can be bleeped during camping. A lady with high taste but has no shishi to contribute is a big liability. The earlier he cuts her off the better.

Dude. Stop telling her what your mum said. Next time....never mention your mum.

Also...whatever you do...do not agree to a two day wedding in two different places. If she wants it...then she can pay for it herself.

If she can't pay. Then she must do whatever she wants to do within the 2m budget you have.

If you allow it to happen Ehn....you go hear am. She will see you as a easy ride and will want her way all the time.

Stick to your guns if she bring this issue up again and simply say you are suspending all wedding plans. Let her know there are many people who did wedding with less than 1 million and they didn't die.if she wants it.. She must contribute to it.



Take this from someone who has been married for a decade!

DAramis:
@OP, traditional marriage is more important, because you will need to fulfil traditions before any other civil marriage (Church marriage inclusive).

The best solution is to move the church wedding to the East then. Do a simple white wedding with 3 witnesses on both sides, and then proceed to the village to do elaborate traditional wedding.

The foods and drinks to be served on the traditional wedding will cover for both weddings. Remember, it could be same day or two days interval between both weddings.
The expenses should even be lesser... probably around 1 million or 1.5 million max.
My opinion.

She wants the wedding in the city according to op

I am not a relationship expert neither am I good in keeping one. But standing as a neutral I can only tell you that If you don't grow up as a man you would end up having issues in your marriage. You have already planted the seed that you can't make your own decisions and you will always need your wife to make good decisions or else na yawa. You have made your wife to think or to know that you are mummy's boy, it is better to be a daddy's boy than a mummy's boy. No woman want to share the love of her man, no matter who, some women even jealous the love of there husbands to there children. Even if your mum gave that super advice , you should have told your fiancee in such a way that she will feel it's your idea. She may even think when you have issues later in your marriage that you will bring third party.

apokan200:
A lady who isn’t contributing financially to her wedding shouldn’t be dragging opinions which money is so much involved with you.I think you caused this whole thing because you shouldn’t planned to even marry a who can’t contribute Atleast 500k to her wedding in the first place bros this is so simple tell her to pay 30 percent of the budget fees if she insisted on doing both home and away kind of wedding

Supported.

Annoms:
I'll try to make this short.

Yesterday I was having a conversation with my fiancée about my mum's suggestion about how to go about our wedding which is scheduled to take place Jan next year. My mum suggested that we do both trad and white wedding on the same day to cut cost. She opined that we do the white wedding in the morning and hold the traditional marriage as a reception in the afternoon. I pretty much see reasons from her perspective considering the harsh economic condition in Nigeria.

I was relating this to my fiancée yesterday in a phone call, when she flared up and said I should have consulted her to seek her opinion on this marriage arrangement before going to my family to seek theirs because I said my mum's advise seems okay.

What I deduce from her plight was that she wants the trad marriage at the village (south-east) while the white at the town where we base (South-West). That was what I initially wanted but due to high inflation in the land, I'm actually tilting towards my mum advise because I can't go bankruptcy just because I want to satisfy her. Why not use a stone to kill two birds?

She wants a cream-de-la-cream kind of wedding but she's not ready to assist financially to make that happen. (she's an awaiting corper)

I told her that the cost of transportation and lodging people from the village (hers and mine) to the city for our white marriage alone is gulping about 500/600k. That's transportation & lodging alone ooo.. I'll now spend if not x2 of what I spent on trad for white.. Why not just do everything in the village and move on with our lives? We can actually have it in the village and it will still be all nice and glamourous.

She said she wants to have a say in how her marriage will look like. Her imput is welcomed. But if she still insist on having the white wedding and not putting finances into consideration. I'm thinking that she want the white wedding on the city because of her friends who will attend which is not enough reason to go bankruptcy for.

It was a heated argument yesterday. We both went to bed angrily and not in talking terms till now

Pls advice accordingly. Thanks

ogbeni, give yourself brain and cut your clothes according to your materials oo. Dont live to please anyone. You may regret it.

Kokaine:
You are the man. Always make it look like you're doing her a favour by marrying her even if you don't say it expressly. Let it be clear that you are aware that many women will give their fairy tooth to marry you in this period where marriages are hard. She should be grateful you are picking her from the millions of available women who will do all your biddings to be your wife.

There are some spectacularly-DUMB folks on Nairaland...
>

Annoms:
I'll try to make this short.

Yesterday I was having a conversation with my fiancée about my mum's suggestion about how to go about our wedding which is scheduled to take place Jan next year. My mum suggested that we do both trad and white wedding on the same day to cut cost. She opined that we do the white wedding in the morning and hold the traditional marriage as a reception in the afternoon. I pretty much see reasons from her perspective considering the harsh economic condition in Nigeria.

I was relating this to my fiancée yesterday in a phone call, when she flared up and said I should have consulted her to seek her opinion on this marriage arrangement before going to my family to seek theirs because I said my mum's advise seems okay.

What I deduce from her plight was that she wants the trad marriage at the village (south-east) while the white at the town where we base (South-West). That was what I initially wanted but due to high inflation in the land, I'm actually tilting towards my mum advise because I can't go bankruptcy just because I want to satisfy her. Why not use a stone to kill two birds?

She wants a cream-de-la-cream kind of wedding but she's not ready to assist financially to make that happen. (she's an awaiting corper)

I told her that the cost of transportation and lodging people from the village (hers and mine) to the city for our white marriage alone is gulping about 500/600k. That's transportation & lodging alone ooo.. I'll now spend if not x2 of what I spent on trad for white.. Why not just do everything in the village and move on with our lives? We can actually have it in the village and it will still be all nice and glamourous.

She said she wants to have a say in how her marriage will look like. Her imput is welcomed. But if she still insist on having the white wedding and not putting finances into consideration. I'm thinking that she want the white wedding on the city because of her friends who will attend which is not enough reason to go bankruptcy for.

It was a heated argument yesterday. We both went to bed angrily and not in talking terms till now

Pls advice accordingly. Thanks

In this day and age, any woman who still values the wedding more than the marriage should not be taken seriously. Put your feet down! If she won't accept, let get GO!

...

Na watin de scatter wedding be this,after the wedding there is a lot of continuous bills coming,pleas don’t spend more than 1m for the wedding,bills no de finish for marriage oooo

This lady that has never earned one kobo in her life wants to bankrupt you.

Oga, if she can't bring 40% of the budget. You are free to have your way. Wedding is a day, marriage is for years. Think twice and hoose who will manage your resources.

.

I read four million naira for wedding

...i'm anxiously waiting for ladies in the house to comment but it seems they are all on observation mood.
Ladies, receive sense...There is no best wedding or worst wedding. What matters is life after.
The money i saved when i did my 'kpankolo' wedding was what i used to buy my land at Ajar,Lagos and to God may have it,i'm living in my own house with my wife who nearly fought me during my wedding because of my choice of wedding.

Kokaine:


Bro if you use that wedding money to travel to Canada, you will get a finer young and richer girl. Don't be cheap. You are only doing her a favour here. Tell her you don't want to marry again that instead you want to travel abroad and marry a white rich girl with long nose so your kids will be very fine and rich. Let's see who calls back

best advice on nairaland this year!

Annoms:
I'll try to make this short.. Thanks

Broda rub for your life. Leave marriage aside:-
[b]Better marry someone that has good financial sense.[b]
If she can't see things from your end when you're unmarried when you now enter the bond?

I forecast disaster. However, it's simple. Let her understand that their is a budget for wedding and after marriage. Lots of things come in.

Youre the man better know when to damn all consequences and put your foot down.

Sickmod:
Awaiting corper?

Best of luck guy

Dem no dry tell person.. Bros no loud am abeg.

Women this days don't want a marriage, it's the wedding they are interested in. Best of luck OP

Can't really say anything coz I don't know how you both started the ship!maybe you alway lavish on her and this has made her have the impression of my man is capable of anything .
secondly just make her see reasons as to why you obliged to ur mum's opinion besides it for u both good !lastly give her time to think !don't worry she'll come around .

Annoms:
I'll try to make this short.

Yesterday I was having a conversation with my fiancée about my mum's suggestion about how to go about our wedding which is scheduled to take place Jan next year. My mum suggested that we do both trad and white wedding on the same day to cut cost. She opined that we do the white wedding in the morning and hold the traditional marriage as a reception in the afternoon. I pretty much see reasons from her perspective considering the harsh economic condition in Nigeria.

I was relating this to my fiancée yesterday in a phone call, when she flared up and said I should have consulted her to seek her opinion on this marriage arrangement before going to my family to seek theirs because I said my mum's advise seems okay.

What I deduce from her plight was that she wants the trad marriage at the village (south-east) while the white at the town where we base (South-West). That was what I initially wanted but due to high inflation in the land, I'm actually tilting towards my mum advise because I can't go bankruptcy just because I want to satisfy her. Why not use a stone to kill two birds?

She wants a cream-de-la-cream kind of wedding but she's not ready to assist financially to make that happen. (she's an awaiting corper)

I told her that the cost of transportation and lodging people from the village (hers and mine) to the city for our white marriage alone is gulping about 500/600k. That's transportation & lodging alone ooo.. I'll now spend if not x2 of what I spent on trad for white.. Why not just do everything in the village and move on with our lives? We can actually have it in the village and it will still be all nice and glamourous.

She said she wants to have a say in how her marriage will look like. Her imput is welcomed. But if she still insist on having the white wedding and not putting finances into consideration. I'm thinking that she want the white wedding on the city because of her friends who will attend which is not enough reason to go bankruptcy for.

It was a heated argument yesterday. We both went to bed angrily and not in talking terms till now


Pls advice accordingly. Thanks

You’ve spoken well but the only error you made here was discussing it with your mum first.

This lady is going to be your wife so make her feel she matters it’s not your mum,s wedding.

Sit her down alone without your mother and discuss the issue again perhaps there is a way to compromise.

Like you say she is a Corper, so am assuming she is young even the bible talks about the foolishness of youth.You probably spoilt her with cash and she has earned bragging rights.

In marriage,it is important how you start so common rice and Dj should not bring bad blood.She also has to mature really quickly as wedding pictures will not pay rent.

Annoms:
I'll try to make this short.

Yesterday I was having a conversation with my fiancée about my mum's suggestion about how to go about our wedding which is scheduled to take place Jan next year. My mum suggested that we do both trad and white wedding on the same day to cut cost. She opined that we do the white wedding in the morning and hold the traditional marriage as a reception in the afternoon. I pretty much see reasons from her perspective considering the harsh economic condition in Nigeria.

I was relating this to my fiancée yesterday in a phone call, when she flared up and said I should have consulted her to seek her opinion on this marriage arrangement before going to my family to seek theirs because I said my mum's advise seems okay.

What I deduce from her plight was that she wants the trad marriage at the village (south-east) while the white at the town where we base (South-West). That was what I initially wanted but due to high inflation in the land, I'm actually tilting towards my mum advise because I can't go bankruptcy just because I want to satisfy her. Why not use a stone to kill two birds?

She wants a cream-de-la-cream kind of wedding but she's not ready to assist financially to make that happen. (she's an awaiting corper)

I told her that the cost of transportation and lodging people from the village (hers and mine) to the city for our white marriage alone is gulping about 500/600k. That's transportation & lodging alone ooo.. I'll now spend if not x2 of what I spent on trad for white.. Why not just do everything in the village and move on with our lives? We can actually have it in the village and it will still be all nice and glamourous.

She said she wants to have a say in how her marriage will look like. Her imput is welcomed. But if she still insist on having the white wedding and not putting finances into consideration. I'm thinking that she want the white wedding on the city because of her friends who will attend which is not enough reason to go bankruptcy for.

It was a heated argument yesterday. We both went to bed angrily and not in talking terms till now

Pls advice accordingly. Thanks

My brother run o! this one only wants wedding for the glitz and glamour not marriage proper. if u like no hear word!

iamDrRhymes:
Maybe you aren’t carrying her along the way you should. Your wife too be should have more say than your mother because it’s her wedding. You guys need to agree

who b dis one again!

You are a weak man.

Its crystal clear.

Im just being honest with you.

As in

4 million naira?

Sisi man spotted, am here crying day and night that my late mother ain’t there anymore to give me Good advices, nature still gave u the privilege of having such a sensible mother still alive, and ur listening to girl that after marrying that may mess up ur life tomorrow with out Remorse.all those men regretting their marriages u think they no spend more than u self..