Lamanii22:
She better need to clean that tears and look for a way to chase the maid away…. I don’t know why people need a maid in the first place

@the bolded.
Exactly my take, especially in young Marriages. An average modern lady likes to have a maid in young marriages. Modern ladies are lazy in house keeping but they wont accept this unfriendly truth. If the maid is now mature to the point of knowing how to cook, then it is like giving a man an option, esp. when he is angry, he might be tempted to ignore her food and ask the maid to cook for him. If the maid is a very good cook, then the man sure has real bigger temptation to fight which I doubt 9 out of every 10 men can resist - the temptation to taste the other food

The safest thing here is there is no need for a matured maid or any maid at all in young marriages.

xevove2061:


Who does the cooking more in your household?

Me
Why

ahmepic:
Dear Poster,
This might not be a popular opinion but you need to listen and hear me out.
From experience I can tell you it is possible all this are in your sister's imagination and here is my story.
My wife once employed a house girl who was a 15 years old and whom I feel needed help based on her poor background. Before the girl resumed, the plan was to send this girl to school and try to make her feel very much like one of our own but just a few days into her coming my wife changed completely and started bullying the poor girl.
The girl never went to school and had no right to come into the sitting room when my kids are watching the TV. One day I came home to saw her crying alone in her room due to loneliness while my own children were playing all around the house happy and that was the day I made up my mind to fight for this poor girl.
My wife reported me to all my family members that the girl want to take over the house since I did not let her send the girl packing as a result of hatred I saw in her for the poor child but I was determined that she either integrate the girl properly into the family or I continue to give her special treatment whenever I come home cos I just can't stand the maltreatment and jealousy over a little girl.

What! You took unworthy risk there man. . Though I do not support the way your wife treated the maid, yet that girl could have been helped from safer distance. Your marriage shouldn't be made to go through such stress just because you want to help a girl.

This type of risks do backfire man.

Lovilla:
trash..

if i am to be in my sister's shoe, i would ve poisoned that girl on a lowkey.

You want to poise her on a low-key? I thought we all agreed that women and feminist don't need a Man in their life? Why wishing to poise another girl because of a man? Awon e-diot feminist. U never see anything. Keep being a feminist while your maid plays the role of a real woman.

Besides you and your sister should better allow that girl to enjoy. A man has the right to marry any girl he wants. If you and your feminist sister isn't okay with that then pack out and stop disturbing us

Lovilla:
trash..

if i am to be in my sister's shoe, i would ve poisoned that girl on a lowkey.

If you have this type of mindset and your sister has even a little bit of the same mindset, then I see where the problem is coming from.

So the only solution your brain can come up with is to poison somebody's child?

Haaaaaaaa!!!!!
Na wao!!!!!

Lovilla:
trash..

if i am to be in my sister's shoe, i would ve poisoned that girl on a lowkey.

Then tell your sister to poison her...

Let's see how she survives it

BloomingDale:
Until Nigerian women begin to understand that marriage is a contract to these Nigerian men, they will keep getting blindsided.

Nigerian men are looking for the best cooks, house-helps, nanny, prostitutes and child bearers in the guise of a wife. That’s why they go looking for such women to marry, and it’s also easy for them to cheat because they are not looking for a companion, but a house slave. Once you can no longer fulfill those conditions he will terminate the contract or go looking for another like your househelp (maybe she is a better cook).

The question is what are you as as a wife gaining from that marriage? The best solution is whatever you are gaining from him, try as much as possible to squeeze and extract as if you are running out of time and make sure you are not giving much more than him.

All that crying is just a waste of your time and effort. Think strategically and stop the foolishness.

Akika
End time marriage adviser!!!

Lovilla:
i dont see where she is getting it wrong

She has always been submissive to her husband

Which submissive? Does a feminist submit to a man? If anything happens to that maid, we must ensure you feminist and your sister pays dearly for it. You and your feminist sister Will spend the remaining of your years on earth in State CID

Lamanii22:
She better need to clean that tears and look for a way to chase the maid away…. I don’t know why people need a maid in the first place

In the African tradition the home belongs to the woman, it is her primary office and when the tasks multiply, to remain efficient, like any office assistance is needed.

These days with the evolution of tradition (for better or worse) with more people born and living in cities the extended family system that offered secured assistance has broken down leading many to bring total 'strangers' into their homes and their lives.

Unfortunately the administration of these 'helps' has not evolved from tradition. It is held in limbo. So you have a strange person in your home but treat the situation with the laxity of the trafitional extended family system.

This is the cause of a lot of problems with so called domestics. People should raise their game and administer the helps to the degree of formality a corporate workforce operates.

That is proper documentation, assessments and interviews. Well spelt out Terms and Conditions of service. Signed Agreements and all. So the woman of the house can assume the position of Manager and watch to see how everyone behaves appropriately.

Many homes I know operate this way without problems.

Get serious with serious people in a serious way and see results.

Berrityga:
Abeg one Crete of beer for the Man and another for All the men knacking their house help. All this women will come online to look for sympathy but forgetting they fucccked peoples husbands before they got married.

It's possible that he's not fucking her

At least not yet.

I think he's just doing this to teach the wife a lesson or something.

WHEN DEY SAY PLAY YOUR WIFEY ROLE UNA GO DEY SHOUT UPANDAN U THINK SAY THIS MAIDS NO GET SENSE?

COOK U GO DEY SHOUT.....MAID IS TAKING OVER SEE TEARS

Lovilla:
My married sister kept complaining how thier house help is about to bring her marriage to the mud.

She said her husband is no longer giving her attention like before just few months the maid arrived.

The maid is taking over her marriage slowly, as her husband only eats food prepared by the house girl.

She has been crying all day.
She said she has tried everything possible to chase the girl away but her husband always kicks against it.

She is afraid of loosing her marriage.

Please, what must she do?

There is nothing wrong in having a maid if one is warranted. Does your sister works long hours?

Chasing the maid now wont solve the problem or might even complicate things. The hubby is going to resist it and if somehow he agrees to let her go, she should be wary. He might just fix her up with a new place.

What i think your sis should do is to self evaluate. Is the maid's cooking better? Then she should make effort to learn and take time to do more of the cooking. Gradually ease the maid out of the role. Same with any other attributes the man might like the maid for.

Secondly, she should have a heart to heart with the hubby to identify areas of improvement. What does he feel he is not getting from her? Let her commit to making changes. Its also a good time for her to air her concerns too.

Chasing the maid is focusing on a battle. Another maid or even woman will just come along
The plan should be to win the war and that requires strategy and time.

You employ housemaid, you then turn into madam.
Maid cares for the kids
Maid welcomes oga from work
Maid feeds Oga
Maid washes Oga's clothes
Maid ensures home is clean
Maid respects Oga
Madam folds hands and believes sex is all a husband needs, wakes up with folded hands, and a sharp tongue.

Madam now cries foul .. oga is paying attention to Maid... Madam never see anything.

Point is the maid is smarter than your sis,if she is not careful d maid will take over that home

For all those women saying i can't be a slave i can't be cooking for a man i will employ a maid to do that

Continue u will get shocked soon

Then let the husband decide, the house maid or her, I don't understand kicking against her leaving the house

Lovilla:
she told me that her husband kicks against all her efforts to throw the girl out

Lovilla:
all i can say is Men are polygamous in nature, so i dont blame him.

Bcause this maid in question doesnt even come close to my sister in terms of beauty.

This is where females get it wrong always, men don't care about physical beauty but the ability to make the home beautiful and conducive for the man.

The truth of the matter is that you've been feeding your husband with poison and call it food. Now that your husband has find a fabulous cook you're pointing an accusing finger at her.

Lovilla:
all i can say is Men are polygamous in nature, so i dont blame him.

Bcause this maid in question doesnt even come close to my sister in terms of beauty.

Shut up!

Do you know what beauty is? After your sister has used the man's money to take care of herself by buying clothes and cream why wouldn't you say she's beautiful?; rubbish. Wait until the man starts packaging and spending money on the maid too, you'll come back and reedit this your comment

If not laziness, you why would a woman need a house maid?
Since she wants to be lazy, she must be thought a lesson
The husband is my kind of man, I will so Bleep you up, ignore you, give all manner attitude (though will never touch the house maid) that you'll be forced to start doing those kitchen stuffs yrslf, nobody will tell you to send the maid packing, and never wish to have a house maid again

adewumiopeyemi:
Your married sister or you

Go to the point so that people can advice you in the comment section


This is not a. Matter of shame again

She's the one affected by this story.

bukatyne:


Can we infer that if the husband is not providing well or good in bed, the wife can start dating the driver?

Well, everybody should make himself happy

Lovilla:
My married sister kept complaining how thier house help is about to bring her marriage to the mud.

She said her husband is no longer giving her attention like before just few months the maid arrived.

The maid is taking over her marriage slowly, as her husband only eats food prepared by the house girl.

She has been crying all day.
She said she has tried everything possible to chase the girl away but her husband always kicks against it.

She is afraid of loosing her marriage.

Please, what must she do?

so as you are like this, you can't save her sisters marriage? You can't do anything, you are not ready to help your sister yet.

Lovilla:
give your opinion Mr Man

It doesnt matter if its me or my sister.

You know what? Eat the food cooked by the maid or ask her to teach you how to cook. You'll understand why she's taking over your marriage. The shortest way to a man's heart is through his stomach.

bukatyne:


Can we infer that if the husband is not providing well or good in bed, the wife can start dating the driver?

Mumu talk. You can date the driver to pepper who? The husband?

This is exactly why you women have fish Brian. What made you think the man won't sent you packing immediately? Date the driver and let's know who will lose na. You think you're doing the man? He'll chase you out of his house ASAP and the bring the maid in with full force. I'm sure you'll go and live with the driver in his village.

Besides I thought we all agreed that women and feminist don't need a Man in their life? What later changed? Awon e-diot feminist without Brain.

Your sister needs to sit her husband down and find out why the attention is shifted to the maid.

If she's lucky, the husband may be honest and thereby amend since your sister is also willing to amend as well...

Mw, if the maid has started entering the other room already, so pe o ti lo

DaddyCash:
Go and learn to cook well my dear.

And don't forget too to learn a new fvcking style. That orthodox style of back for ground, legs wide open is boring. Instead of hating the House-help, swallow your pride and ask her what style she is using to dazzle your husband.

This comment is underated!

Sorry to say bro… your sister is a lazy hag, a pull back, she is lazy, dirty, disrespectful and obviously a bad cook who doesn’t want to improve but bent on making her husband’s life miserable in the name of “marriage is for better for worse”.

Tell your sister to change her dress style whenever her hubby is around. Tell her to secretly sign up for a one on one cooking class. She should stop wearing tight jeans to bed but make access to her Cocky jar as easy as possible.

Tell her to be deliberate about improving on these things I’ve mentioned up there instead of running to prayer houses to deceive herself.

You will thank me later bro…
Otherwise, your sister will be abandoned and sent packing sooner than expected.

You can’t be useless in your husband house in the name of forbetterforwosre. Ire o.

endsarrrs:


Laws of power: "Never outshine your master"

Inappropriate context…

That law doesn’t apply in this scenario as the master is the husband…


And he seems pleased!

Lovilla:
give your opinion Mr Man

It doesnt matter if its me or my sister.

Correct Girl

Have anyone see it from some angles which include;
* The married sister can’t make good meals for the husband?
* The married sister can’t do house chores properly until the maid come?
* The married sister had at a time been knacks by other married man/men before she got married?

Check Out o

If truely is the issue of cooking alone not From the other room,
Which i doubt, because it sounded something is missing here.

let your sister learn from the girl and have the best way of cooking.
Simple.

Lovilla:
trash..

if i am to be in my sister's shoe, i would ve poisoned that girl on a lowkey.

I'm sure you're not up to 25 years.

Small pikin!

Even if you get plans to mud person, must you say it on a public forum?

Do you know that if anything happens to that girl now, it will be difficult to prove your innocence?

You people just open your mouth waaaaaa and type whatever lingers in your brains.


No be advice you come find here, Na accomplice you dey look for.

Dey play!