Miraijj:
Can you remember one heediot's thread where he was like, "I hit her, I regret it, She deserved it? Na me be the 'she'.

You see that beautiful woman, babyosisi, I don't know her from Adam neither did I run into her back in my days at Eden, God really imbued her with rare insight to see beyond the surface.

And those who think I need deliverance,I really do. Why don't I,when I allowed that sickled demented fellow into my beautiful life.

Ask him, he'ld tell you that a hundred cloned persons that are his exact lookalike no fit reach my feet!

That guy has got talent. He writes well, but Mba! No! He no go gree use am well. Na to dey flood NL with rubbish, dey look for who im go invite im pity party.

Ehen! Back to the matter on ground, I used to physically abuse you ehn? Anu! Do I have anything to tell you? Never! What do you even expect me to do with an expired entity? Bullshit am big time!
So you didn't tell the world that you took a two months plus baby to a neighbour's house about nine poles away and hurried to the market to buy milk and baby carrier because you didn't want her to suckle my 'stupid' breast. Okwa ya?

Why didn't you tell the world you were sexually harassing my friend in my presence when you thought I was deep asleep and it happened that she slept over?
Why didn't you? Why?

So you told a girl I was an ex while we were together because you were trying to chat her up on whatsapp?
My friends hate you to the end of the world! Yes! They couldn't imagine their friend (me of course) doomed for life all in the name of marriage nzuzu. I was too blind in foolish love to see what they were seeing.

And you thought you had totally gotten me especially with my having a child for you? Oh boy you lied big time!

Everyone calls me wicked! That I left this fellow because he is moneyless! That's their damning business! Do I owe them an explanation? Never! All those times I was hungry while heavily pregnant because of misplaced and ill-timed love, I was just being a fool,I was!

You know one thing about this type of fellows? They have a sweet deceptive tongue! So what do I do to protect myself from them? I use my brain, make more than enough money and learn to act like a mermaid.

Chai! I felt like poo poo... This guy would tell me to my face, "thanks, you taught me to explore sex". He would even call me an irresponsible girl whose parents abandoned because of her irresponsibility!

So you could call a girl you once dated to come sleep over and you had the effrontery to tell me?

He would tell me how I was vulnerable, and how he was the only person who could love me. You don love me finish na? I believed him. I believed I was responsible for all the problems we had.

Why would you talk to me anyhow in the presence of others in the name of being 'frank'?

I became a nervous wreck. Jesus! I was totally losing my self worth. A terrible part of me I never knew was there surfaced.

And to even think that this dude told me to write down everything about him I would love to have changed... In my mind I was like, "why would I when I would just waste my time, merely baring my mind for him to see, just as he had been using everything I call secret against me."

So as you can see, I no longer have any secret. I am as open as a newspaper, so you just seat tight, read and yes, enjoy, if there is anything enjoyable!

Then he insulted my father to his face! Chai! That was the last straw!

FINAL WARNING: If you send any other bastard sms to me again, Amadioha go reshuffle your fingers!

Life's more fulfilling and more promising without you! Oshi!

OMG now I see why the guy whooped ur azz, you're a ghetto, ignorant, insulting, manipulative, psychotic, annoying BITCCH!!!!!! GODDAMN wonder how that guy managed to be with you all these while?!?!?!!? no atom of respect and you ain't got respect for yourself.... I'm surprised damn that guy is THE BEST NIGERIAN GENTLEMAN I will testify to that. You are DAMAGED GOODS (emotionally, spiritually, intellectually and other ramifications) . IF YOU'RE LIKE THIS ONLINE THEN WONDER WHAT U R IN PERSON, you just confirmed that what THE guy was saying /typed were true.

#FkBitcches. #MyHapinessOverEveryAnyGirl

Please these are not insults dear, you should just be on your own. no SANE MAN can be with you.

yagbaboy1:

I understand ur point cocoa, but the fact she is calling names and making moving on look grand made me input that
And u self busy body, why u come dey quote me I call ur name. BTW wether u agree or not, it's d man Dat bleeps d woman. Shikina

All of us for this thread na busybody so anybody fit quote anybody.

You believe what you want to but my man and I feck each other, period.

coogar:
what a way to start a monday.....

miraijj, can you formally introduce yourself and tell the house who you are & what your query is?

wonders shall never end on NL

...heard Putin was off the radar for 11days ... With his mistress who just put to bed

sweetcocoa:
Seriously though, why do you clamor for equality when you want to be treated differently in some aspects? How is he the architect of her irresponsibility? Is she underage? Was she raped?

This has nothing to do with equality. They made a mess together. He was supposed to be supportive. He wasn't. Instead he taunted her for a mistake he contributed to. She reacted as a normal human would and his answer was to beat her up.

I don't get how equality has anything to do with this issue.

Do you guys just bring it up to sound politically correct or what?


Say this lady hepled him make a mess of his life for example financially and when others ridicule him for it,she joins to ridicule him and call him irresponsible, if he reacts hurt like is expected, would we be talking about equality and how he's not supposed to be pained because he's trying to show equality?

Nairaland!

Everything jumbled into one. Related or not

sweetcocoa:
All of us for this thread na busybody so anybody fit quote anybody.

You believe what you want to but my man and I feck each other, period.

I dey laff. Chai!

@sweetcocoa defending mcdokwe
I hope you'll say the same if an abuser gets his hand on your daughter tomorrow, sexing her like no man business, impregnates her outside wedlock and gives her the type of blows he himself described here, and insults your husband

Just because this another person's daughter, u're asking if she was raped.
Let's be careful. Karma never dissapoints


If this lady was abusive as u paint her, she could've silently cut his JT that night or at least before moving on. Just saying

coogar:


this is what i call objectivity.
it saddens me when women who ask for equality cannot own responsibility of their bad behaviour. she was as abusive in the relationship as he was.

That woman is very intelligent. she thinks like a man.

I think she and mizmycoli need to continue to give their advice here,the rest should go watch africa magic.

Wedon:


Relationships are difficult . . . yes we women tend to push men to the wall. Me, I can try the patience of a saint . . . It's not something I am proud of ooh.
But the day my husband lays his hands on me is the day I walk . . . we go share the kids 50/50 . . . Every man to himself.

Abeg I want to live long to enjoy my children jor . .

keep tempting him till he snaps and whoops your azz or ignores you and gets himself a mistress outside...

why not stop tempting your husband and live happily with him in harmony so that both of you can enjoy ur kids without bringing awkward divorce situations to your whole family?!?!? :-((
if you keep going this way believe me UR AZZ WHOOPING IS ON THE WAY!! no man wants to beat a woman but the women make most men surprise themselves, ur hubby might be a victim too.

#FishBrainSyndrome

cococandy:


This has nothing to do with equality. They made a mess together. He was supposed to be supportive. He wasn't. Instead he taunted her for a mistake he contributed to. She reacted as a normal human would and his answer was to beat her up.

I don't get how equality has anything to do with this issue.

Do you guys just bring it up to sound politically correct or what?


Say this lady hepled him make a mess of his life for example financially and when others ridicule him for it,she joins to ridicule him and call him irresponsible, if he reacts hurt like is expected, would we talking about equality and how he's not supposed to be pained because he's trying to show equality?

Nairaland!

Everything jumbled into one. Related or not

Nothing is being jumbled here, you said he is the architect(emphasis on the word 'architect'), by saying so, you absorbed her of any responsibly, you actually said the OP planned it all, that's why I brought up equality, because you sounded like he should take the crap because he "got" her pregnant.

I read the dude's thread and I read the OP's. He didn't just start taunting her did he? He told her friend not to come to his house, she started insulting him and a fight ensued, now how is it all his fault?

He has his own faults ofcourse but I don't agree with you all supporting the lady because she is a woman, apportion blames accordingly is all I'm saying.

sweetcocoa:
Seriously though, why do you clamor for equality when you want to be treated differently in some aspects? How is he the architect of her irresponsibility? Is she underage? Was she raped?

No she wasn't but let's be honest here, the women have it harder in this situation and end up sacrificing more, she is the one who got taunted by friends and foes alike, got abandoned by family, probably experienced some hitches in school or work. she is the one who may find it difficult to get married in the future if she is unfortunate to keep meeting narrow-minded men.
She is the one who would give anything to make this relationship work because she has more to lose, the fact that she is giving up and he is the one begging should say a lot.
Asides the physical abuse, did you see the obvious signs of emotional abuse and manipulation he has been giving her? he told her that he was the only person who could love her, that she was responsible for all their problems, he talks to her anyhow in the presence of friends under the guise of being 'frank', she said she actually lost her self worth (who wouldn't)
Then he turns around and insults her for being dumb enough to turn her back on friends and family for his sake, finally he beats her blue black while her baby (his supposed joy) is just two months and comes online to brag. the physical beating was the least of his problems.

There is only so much a person can take, she is fighting to take back her self esteem, bashing him online is completely okay, IMO
She is also the architect of her irresponsibility and now that she is taking charge of her life again, he should leave her be

sweetcocoa:
Why did she go further to insult him with everyone asking her to stop to no avail, did she tell you she didn't hit him too? I know you'd say a man hits harder but that's just bull.

Who's fault is it that she has a child?

Verbal abuse is just as bad as physical abuse, in most cases sef, verbal abuse brings about physical abuse, so yea, they are pretty much the same, so if you decide to stay with a man who would hit you for insulting him especially because he can't keep up with you in that department, then that's your fault.

Verbal/Emotional abuse takes skills that this woman does not have. If the op could raise his hands on her multiple times and claim or realize that she deserved it, he is not showing the signs of an abused man. What makes verbal/emotional abuse powerful is that the abused tend to think he/she deserved the treatment he/she got. Who the abuser is becomes very unclear in the mind of the abused.

There is a reason verbal abuse is not a crime. You cannot put your hands on someone because they insulted you, if you cannot retaliate verbally, then leave the situation. He threw the first punch.

Btw, he told her that he was the only person who could love her, that she was responsible for all their problems,.......... This man is not innocent.

sweetcocoa:
Nothing is being jumbled here, you said he is the architect(emphasis on the word 'architect'), by saying so, you absorbed her of any responsibly, you actually said the OP planned it all that's why I brought up equality, because you sounded like he should take the crap because he "got" her pregnant.

I read the dude's thread and I read the OP's. He didn't just start taunting her did he? He told her friend not to come to his house, she started insulting him and a fight ensued, now how is it all his fault?

He has his own faults ofcourse but I don't agree with you all supporting the lady because she is a woman, apportion blames accordingly is all I'm saying.

lol. Planned ke? that was you reading multiple meanings into a simple post


In the spirit of equality, she's moving on and taking care of her shiit.

He should do same. At least now he knows he's not the only one who can 'love' her.
She's loving herself and her family is there too.

Imagine a man who think this kind of love is all she deserves from everybody in the world. He must think she's beneath scum.

cococandy:
lol. Planned ke? that was you reading multiple meanings into a simple post

go watch africa magic,this kind of thing is not your calling.

Rose2014:
@sweetcocoa defending mcdokwe
I hope you'll say the same if an abuser gets his hand on your daughter tomorrow, sexing her like no man business, impregnates her outside wedlock and gives her the type of blows he himself described here, and insults your husband

Just because this another person's daughter, u're asking if she was raped.
Let's be careful. Karma never dissapoints


If this lady was abusive as u paint her, she could've silently cut his JT that night or at least before moving on. Just saying

chai!! that would have been something to see
imagine the title of the thread he would create: " I beat her, she castrated me, I deserved it"

remsonik:


His anger should be used to justify the slap, yet after the slap he couldn't have a rethink and still had the effontery to beat her up again??. Do you still think she would have gotten over that in 3 months?? babe a boyfriend or fiance is different from a man you have a child for o

Lemme tell you she can never forget the pain
Cut the babe some slacks please, the guy can talk here since it's easy for him but the lady won't find it easy to move on.
@the bolded, Do we now have to use physical abuse to justify verbal abuse??

If you don't want to be beaten, don't run your mouth like a leaking faucet.

Rose2014:


I beg to disagree o
This guy rants more than a woman
Don't let him sweet talk u like he did op and started mocking her and her family

The guy is worse than a beast and op is lucky he didn't kill her
Imagine his rants to his father in law, talk less of the lady in question

I smh in disgust for him

Lady are you one of the ops so called friends? See as you carry the matter for head. I hate nl cos of all this itk them. Haba! take a chill pill.

Shollypopzz:


Verbal/Emotional abuse takes skills that this woman does not have. If the op could raise his hands on her multiple times and claim or realize that she deserved it, he is not showing the signs of an abused man. What makes verbal/emotional abuse powerful is that the abused tend to think he/she deserved the treatment he/she got. Who the abuser is becomes very unclear in the mind of the abused.

There is a reason verbal abuse is not a crime. You cannot put your hands on someone because they insulted you, if you cannot retaliate verbally, then leave the situation. He threw the first punch.

Btw, he told her that he was the only person who could love her, that she was responsible for all their problems,.......... This man is not innocent.

took the words right out of my mouth

charles316:


go watch africa magic,this kind of thing is not your calling.

it is your calling. Now solve the problem for them.

Goat

Rose2014:

If this lady was abusive as u paint her, she could've silently cut his JT that night or at least before moving on. Just saying

Rose2014:
@sweetcocoa defending mcdokwe
I hope you'll say the same if an abuser gets his hand on your daughter tomorrow, sexing her like no man business, impregnates her outside wedlock and gives her the type of blows he himself described here, and insults your husband

Just because this another person's daughter, u're asking if she was raped.
Let's be careful. Karma never dissapoints


If this lady was abusive as u paint her, she could've silently cut his JT that night or at least before moving on. Just saying

wtf are you talking about? If my daughter packs her beg to go live with a man she's not married to, then whatever she gets, is her beeswax.

I will do my part by teaching her to make better judgments, you hear me? I will actually bury my head in shame if this OP is my daughter because as far as I'm concerned, I failed as a parent, I'm in my mid 20's and I've never gotten pregnant and if happen to get pregnant tomorrow, I will take full responsibility so long as I wasn't raped.

Women too were created with common sense, is it a crime to use it? You go out with a guy, get pregnant, decide to have the baby and you turn around to solely blame the guy? What kinda thinking is that one?

Lol @ cutting his JT, why do you all think it is only abuse when someone gets hit?

cococandy:
it is your calling. Now solve the problem for them.

Goat

your husband is the goat here.

mcdokwe:
she may not beg me, but if every other thing fails we will have to explain to the child why daddy and mama didn't work

You are so immature, after bringing your personal issues to nl to disgrace yourself and your gf/wife you still want it to work. Most of the people ranting here, are going through worst situations in real life than you. Learn from your mistake .

cococandy:
take your own advice too. Thank you.

You'll need it more than me!

Rose2014:


The guy too is abusive o

He should tell us what he said of her family

*sips my fanta*

I am sorry, I won't oblige you and the likes. She wasn't a misfortune. I know you expect me to say how bad her family is, but no. To guide you, it is all linked to how I felt I was treated which even though uncalled for were understandable and thus excusable, what other deduction you wish to make is at you discretion. I learnt my lessons it is upto those who are likely to make our same mistakes to learn or not. I offered myself as a blackboard you could all learn from. I tried making things up between her dad and herself for my gross irresponsibility but failed, the tables have turned and I am willing to take the fall.

With exception to the outright insults, I still pick a word of two from people who think they are bashing me, hopefully she won't see those saying things that don't favour her as spiteful. None of you actually knew what we had and for the records, even though a single push is as bad as beating a spouse black and blue, it wasn't exactly as bad as people want to see it, whichever shouldn't have happened. For those who'd keep bashing, Kontinu, we could get back and laugh at you all or find better spouses and prove we aren't all that unsaleable.

She has won a place already and whenever I talk about her, it would be with a regretful passion not a spiteful one.

To people out there who could grab something from all this, people's wants can't be same as yours, and the greatest mistake is to judge what you have from their eyes. People who have told her she should leave me as much as I know have personally told me she should feel lucky she had me, now knowing both contradicting sentiments from same souls, I wonder what they stood to gain. I think I am done replying these posts.

I could careless about most of you especially the acclaimed wife of Azubuike.
I learn, I take blames and I work out where I need to.

fem29:



Ahh noo oo, I don't condone all that prostitute talk ooo, I don't know her and she came for me for no discernible reason. Dont come for me unless I send for you.

Also I don't use bad words against people. I just explain my points concisely

Nice one

Choi, I have invoices and accounts to do and I'm here reading this never ending thread, I don die oo

cococandy:
lol. Planned ke? that was you reading multiple meanings into a simple post


In the spirit of equality, she's moving on and taking care of her shiit.

He should do same. At least now he knows he's not the only one who can 'love' her.
She's loving herself and her family is there too.

Imagine a man who think this kind of love is all she deserves from everybody in the world. He must think she's beneath scum.

No, that was me using your words.

I have said it countless times that I'm not supporting the OP but I hate it when grown a$$ women can't take responsibility for the actions they take.

I wouldn't date a guy that treats me that way and if I do, I should be totally blamed for it, well unless I'm an 1mbecile with no mind of my own.

He is not innocent just like the OP isn't, that is my point.

Shollypopzz:


Verbal/Emotional abuse takes skills that this woman does not have. If the op could raise his hands on her multiple times and claim or realize that she deserved it, he is not showing the signs of an abused man. What makes verbal/emotional abuse powerful is that the abused tend to think he/she deserved the treatment he/she got. Who the abuser is becomes very unclear in the mind of the abused.

There is a reason verbal abuse is not a crime. You cannot put your hands on someone because they insulted you, if you cannot retaliate verbally, then leave the situation. He threw the first punch.

Btw, he told her that he was the only person who could love her, that she was responsible for all their problems,.......... This man is not innocent.

No body is saying the man is innocent but the woman is as guilty as the man, am sure you haven't seen someone emotional abused that he has to commit suicide because of that, you have to loose your self worth because of that, that you posion yourself because of that.

So, the lady was at fault too by continue abusing and saying derogatory words to the guy which we aren't opportune to see only we learnt about the guys own because he said it.
Also the tone and tune the lady used to make her first posting concerning the matters shows how she is and uncultured with her mouth







IMO the man says he beat her on two occasion

Serious case!!!

Relationship wahala !!

fem29:
Choi, I have invoices and accounts to do and I'm here reading this never ending thread, I don die oo

Where's my cane? Oya, go and balance that account and leave tori alone ..

cococandy:


This has nothing to do with equality. They made a mess together. He was supposed to be supportive. He wasn't. Instead he taunted her for a mistake he contributed to. She reacted as a normal human would and his answer was to beat her up.

I don't get how equality has anything to do with this issue.

Do you guys just bring it up to sound politically correct or what?


Say this lady hepled him make a mess of his life for example financially and when others ridicule him for it,she joins to ridicule him and call him irresponsible, if he reacts hurt like is expected, would we be talking about equality and how he's not supposed to be pained because he's trying to show equality?

Nairaland!

Everything jumbled into one. Related or not

May you never be beaten.

But may you also never use your mouth rather than your head to think.

Talking about verbal abuse, they both abused each other.. Whose fault the girl could talk more??( If true)


Beating a woman in public leaves her with no iota of self respect, people wouldn't take her seriously again... People were even trying to hold him but he overpowered them and continued pounding her...

Also, If he could tell that to the girl's dad, why do you guys think he hasn't told the girl worse?? They're both verbally abusive so should sort themselves...

Just forget about marrying that lady because her dad will chase you out of his compound with a cutlass if you try to come after "the girl he abondoned"..

dre11:


No body is saying the man is innocent but the woman is as guilty as the man, am sure you haven't seen someone emotional abused that he has to commit suicide because of that, you have to loose your self worth because of that, that you posion yourself because of that.

So, the lady was at fault too by continue abusing and saying derogatory words to the guy which we aren't opportune to see only we learnt about the guys own because he said it.
Also the tone and tune the lady used to make her first posting concerning the matters shows how she is and uncultured with her mouth

IMO the man says he beat her on two occasion

On this issue, we both have a common stand.