teflonbuzz:

It's a small world man. Is this the Yuzedo I know? Did you serve in Lagos and play a lot of soccer?

oppinionated:
she hurt you this bad? I can make everything okay you know?

I bet you could, sisthren...

ahsekeena:



Awwwwww








U need to tell her that u know she's cheating. That might be a wake up call for her. I'm sure she'll apologise and u two will be good together again. Happens.


Everyone cheats

czarr:
what do you mean by every1 cheats madame?.....speak for yourself biko

yuzedo:
[size=3pt]Sir,

Making excuses for a cheating woman is dangerous. You don't want to be with someone who can pass off bàstards as yours. Nothing good about a cheating woman because she is automatically a liar, thief, and a potential killer.

Be strong and do the painful (but right) thing. You deserve better and I promise you if you go out there knowing you can, you WILL get better. Don't dwell on her and how nobody out there can match her love or beat the connection/chemistry you both had. Speaking on the authority of experience... Cut that bìtch off for your futures sake. Your kids deserve better than a heaux mama.

Salute. [/size]

ahsekeena:



Awwwwww








U need to tell her that u know she's cheating. That might be a wake up call for her. I'm sure she'll apologise and u two will be good together again. Happens.


Everyone cheats

DollyParton1:

Oh yeah. ... keep bullshiting.

teflonbuzz:

From what I saw she doesn't really like the guy cos they just kept the whole thing like they were just having fun. No sentiments. I would have questioned my bed skills but I know what I'm made of, which she and others before her have confirmed...which only leaves me with the question,why? Is it just boredom or what?

kowema:


O.p, this is really sad mehn! And I feel ur pain. This is how u shud confront her:, find a way to invite her over and treat her to a very romantic dinner that u cooked your self at ur place. Don't give her the slightest indication dat smtn is wrong, just keep looking into her eyes while u play, tease her etc..She may be uneasy at first knowing she has strings with someone else but later she wud get comfortable. At the climax of the dinner, hold her hands gently, loook into her eyes and ask her "why"?, she will be all dramatic but keep ur cool, den tell her she has been cheating on u and u know. Let her confess, allow her to talk even if she gets defensive, after she talks, let her know how much u love her and also make her know u won't hold her against u and that she is free and then ask her is that what u wan?"...she may be all crying at this pointt. At that point, tell her to make up her mind that what ever decision she takes is fine but u still love her. Don't shout oh. Then leave her and go to bed. You wud kill her if u do this smoothly and she wud remember for the rest of her life. Now if she comes back crying and begging, you can nowget angry, and then warn her Neva eva to try that with u again. Give her instructions like call him now and tell him its over, delete his number etc. Then go on and love her dis time with plenty adventure.
Her kind of person loves adventure and attention, the moment u take ur eyes off them, they cud fall for someone else weda good or bad.
Goodluck winning ur love back

teflonbuzz:


Exactly. If I ever keep her and say we get married, I am going to spend my life worrying if she'll be a repeat offender. You know the kind of thing where you are scared if you wanna travel without her that she may repeat old ways.
Just my 2Kobo.

kowema:
@ WackyJ1, on the contrary, if she comes back to him, she wud neva ever try it again. All u need to do then is telll her u love her nd wud do anytn for her, den tell her she shud always tell u wat she wants and how she wants it. Meanwhile, you can't keep her as a frnd trust me, she likes to win hence she must neva smell ur relationship. You either forgive her and take her back or u forgv her and let her go completely. If she wants u back and u don't take her back and u keep her as a frnd, she may ruin ur next relatiosnship, even marriage unless she is God fearing. Remeber, they like to win hence if she can't have u no one else will

ted1741:
Young man, let me give you one golden advise. First, you live in the USA and know or should know that going to confront her, whatever that means, may land you in a very serious legal situation that may ruin you either financially or pyschologically or both. Sexual assualt (confronting her) is a criminal offence that is indictable in most states (USA) and provinces (in Canada). You are distraught understably, however, I advise you to stop imagining her as some precious possession only available to you. Yes she betrayed you and no explanation can justify it but she is only a girlfriend not your wife or personal property. Whatever drove her to someone else cannot be justified but one thing is clear, the relationship will never be the same again even if she apologises and you get back together. You do not need to fly to whereever she is, call her first, ask some basic questions about your relationship. Since you know her well, her responses, including hesitations, brief silences, questions, answers, etc will give you a clue on what she is up to. Tell her about your findings but be careful she may turn it against you for intruding into her privacy and snooping on her. If she apologises, you then decide whether/not to continue with the relationship. Boarding a plan to confront her may make things worst unless she suggests you both meet and discuss. Whatever happens, be sure to stop rewinding the good times, her love to you, the sexes etc. The more you think about them, the more you are tempted to make irrational decision and in fact the more sleepless nights you will have because all you will be doing is imagining another man grinding in between her pelvics and the maonings that ooz out of her mouth. These will only drive you insane which ultimately may push you to go and confront her as you are thinking, at the end what you will achieve is a metaphor of sanity being guilty of insanity. Nothing good will come out of it. Whatever you do, don't beg her out of desperation because you don't appear to have done anything wrong based on your account and refuse the guilty trip. Once you show desperation by beging, your are doomed and have given her unsolicited weapon of choice, it is a dangerous precedent. And yes, you will survive even if it ends because time heals. Maybe you don't know her as much as you thought, good relationships survive long distances. You have not told us how long you were seperated by distance, and why you feel it is your fault, however, remember that every disappointment may be a blessing in disguise. The problem sometimes is that we look to hard into a closed door and refuse to see an open one that has better future for us. She may be pretty but a good player ready for the asking, a side of her you never knew before now. Right now, you are a nervous wrack by the sound of it, get yourself together, take a deep breath and don't jump to hasty decisions. Women are the downfalls of many people in north America financially and otherwise. Ultra radical feminists have inherently help the laws and judicial system to be anti men, therefore be careful what and how you manage the situation. Goodluck.

teflonbuzz:

Thanks for your advice. Made lotta sense.

A relationship worth keeping is with someone that encourages you, appreciates you, respects you, supports you, and treats you very well. If that person is giving more hurt and pain, let go of that person and end that relationship. Don't get treated less when there are people that will treat you a lot better.

ahsekeena:



Awwwwww








U need to tell her that u know she's cheating. That might be a wake up call for her. I'm sure she'll apologise and u two will be good together again. Happens.


Everyone cheats

I DON"T KNOW WHAT I SHOULD CALL TO STRIKE YOU!!!!!

tai2:


Ever since I wrote a classic back in the day on these issues, I don't comment on them again but for you I will make an exception in order to cure you of the illness you currently suffer from.

Before I became what they call a bad man, I chopped nonsense, in the name of love. That was until I got sense. You have to ask yourself why women cheat on nice guys but will spend their time on men who maltreat them and tell them how it is. People like Chris Brown, who will use his babe for orgie.s, have a baby outside with another babe and yet his babe keeps leaving and coming back. Or is it other men and their sidechicks? Having babies with 5 women all begging them.

A babe will carry her lifesavings and give a guy she's tripping for while another mugu will be spending silly. You're here deceiving and consoling yourself that she's not really into the guy, yet she's buying plane tickets, booking hotels and asking him to come and lash her and take her to Cloud 9? Boy, you'd better behave. Love is no excuse for foolishness.

Being an occasional romantic is fun, being a she-man is not. Even to the women. Right now, this babe has wronged you badly and truly but in your mind here you are trying to justify her actions, asking yourself why, defending her and even blaming yourself. Reminiscing of good times, what she did, what she said etc. etc. You are becoming a she-man. Accusing yourself of what is no fault of yours.

My brother, even if you confront her and she cries her eyes out, she will still end up doing the same thing again, because at this stage when she cries, your heart is ready to forgive her immediately. Its like a child who commits a crime and you beat the child, he cries a bit and then you pat him all too quickly. That child will repeat the same thing again, because they are yet to learn their lesson.

You claim your babe is occasionally stubborn. Nah. She's disrespectful. It's that disrespect that has led her to cheat on you. A man might have zero kobo and a woman will slave to be at his feet, but she will give another Mr Nice Guy all the attitude in the world. You right now, should be very angry but there is a path of action.

Right now you are holding your heart in your hand and when confronted she will step on it with high heels, blame you and then because you're so deep in love, na you go begin beg. From begging that is the beginning of your problems. No, your case is not different. I have seen it more than 20 times. It is the same issue and no amount of story or settlement between you and her will bring peace right now.

The best scenario right now is to send her an SMS. Not a long one. A short one (not pouring your heart out). Something along the lines of "I know you and Mr. Bleep have been doing the nasty and I'm disappointed to find out but nonetheless, I wish you and him a pleasant future together. There's no need talking about it, asking me the how or telling me the why. It's over between us.".

My brother at this stage you are, your heart wants to tell her so many things, how you would have done this, how you would have done that, how you're so in love with her and had plans etc. Let me tell you the truth. All those things you're planning to tell her, will do no good. She might weep, she might initially act touched but she's still off in the distance and she will repeat the same thing again, if she does not go ahead and continue with the guy. Keep the SMS short and discharge her. Do not explain. It may seem sweet when you do. It is a waste of your blooody time. Women prefer being brutalized and cut off abruptly, not long explanations. Why are you explaining? Are you the one who cheated? Is this your fault?

You need to burn her bridges, let her be the babe who went out to sample excitement and came back and found the door locked and her things packed out. You need to shock her to her marrow and leave her abandoned. Trust me if you abandon her and whoever she's with, that relationship with the guy will crumble in a few months. Don't think sitting down to talk or accepting her back now will solve anything. You will just be digging your grave, because if you make the mistake of confronting and forgiving, hahahaha, you will never sleep in peace, you will always remain in suspicion, checking her emails etc.

She's at a stage where her mind is in conflict, she cannot decide what she wants and because of the new catch, she's leaning towards the other guy. Cut her off now and do it quick. Let her know that you have made her decision for her.

She might initially cry and beg, send you SMSes, call your phone etc etc. My brother do not yield. Women cry in this case because they have been caught. Not necessarily because of deep down remorse. Initially when she begs, your body go sweet you small. Then when she stops begging you will be tempted to reach out and accept her because despite the silence you're forming, you still love her. My brother even then, do not yield. Stonewall your heart. Pain now will be your salvation later.

My brother confront her with the SMS and cease all communication with the babe for 90 days. If she doesn't reach out to you after that and moves on with her life. Swallow your bitter pill there and there.

Yes, we have been there, some of us have almost committed suicide, drank to stupor, felt there was no one else in this life for us etc. A broken heart can feel almost like death or worse itself. You wake up clutching your heart at night but my brother,six months, one year later or two. You will heal.

I would advice you even if you do not love anyone but her right now. After confronting her, two weeks later, get yourself a new girl. A rebound chick. Not a chick you will complain about your ex to. Someone you will screw and set your head straight even if you don't love her. Loneliness is your enemy.

In closing let me give you a final warning. The last person you should take advice over this issue from is women. Including the ones here. They say one thing and mean another. The moment you become putty in their sister's hands from following their advice, you will never know peace. Trust me, endure the pain now and leave with your pride first, you will never regret it in future.


Anything you think you're feeling now. We've been there. Trust me. Do not justify. Do not explain. Do not yield. Act accordingly.

femcruz:


I DON"T KNOW WHAT I SHOULD CALL TO STRIKE YOU!!!!!

femcruz:


where have u been sir?

Goodnuel:
Just forgive am

tai2:


I've been roaming the world. Just came back to see that men are still falling into the hands of these people. Lol.

teflonbuzz:

That's the problem. If I dump her,who will I get next that I am sure won't cheat? A nun? This is like dumping the last 2 yrs of my life. What bothers me more is that I don't wanna see her happy with someone else. Ain't gonna lie, taking her life crossed my mind for a minute not out of hatred but just so I can live with this. It still feels like it's my loss....this damn girl gave me some of the best years of my life.