Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,151,929 members, 7,814,145 topics. Date: Wednesday, 01 May 2024 at 07:44 AM

My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job - Family - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job (34284 Views)

My Wife Is A Good Woman But Hates Sex After Marriage / My Boss Is Threatening My Marriage / My Wife Is Not What I Thought Before We Got Married: I Want To Divorce (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (Reply) (Go Down)

My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by tallfish145(m): 1:55pm On Nov 22, 2015
I graduated in 2012 and had my NYSC in 2014 but since then getting a meaning job has been a major challenge for me. Though after my NYSC,I opened an hair dressing salon for my wife in my hometown but after few months,she asked if we can relocate to abuja(where we met). After so many pressures from her,she moved to Abuja sometime in March,2015 and i later joined her in April after she secured an apartment i paid for. I stayed idle(after many job search) for two months before i got somewhere(through nairaland). As a graduate,i was earning 20k per month and transportation to work in month cost about 9-10k. Due to stress,i left the place after 3months. Now,this is November, no job and my wife is threatening to leave me,for reason that she hasn't experience hardship when she was alone. Please advice me on what to do friends.

10 Likes 6 Shares

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by musco4me: 2:11pm On Nov 22, 2015
Is ur wife still doing the hair dressn stuff? I tink a good wife should always be by her husband's side both in good and bad situations. OP u shouldnt hv left the little job u had b4. I suggest u intensify ur effort on job search and also try discussn wit ur wife to be patient with u at the moment. But after discussn with her and she still insists on leavn, then u better use ur tongue to count ur teeth. Maybe shes just after material things. Thats all.

92 Likes 8 Shares

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by StPete: 2:12pm On Nov 22, 2015
She should be ashamed of herself for even making such statements. A wife is a helpmate. If you are down, she should be there to assist pending wen u get back on ur feet, rather than making threats and giving u ultimatums

90 Likes 10 Shares

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by OCTAVO: 2:14pm On Nov 22, 2015
Maybe she's not completely your wife. angry

62 Likes 4 Shares

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by Karleb(m): 2:28pm On Nov 22, 2015
Tell her to leave and take your shop back.

33 Likes

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by Nova15: 2:30pm On Nov 22, 2015
But OP why should you even be thinking of marrying when you haven't secured a job?


You should get your priorities striaght!

256 Likes 12 Shares

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by DUNKA(m): 2:31pm On Nov 22, 2015
What happened to d vow of For better or worse?
These hoes ain't loyal grin

16 Likes

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by gentlesinna(m): 2:32pm On Nov 22, 2015
Jack ruby her ass out of ur life dude.
She is not a wife material.
Hope u dnt need me to tell u dat somebody is Bleep her outside.jst let her go,den focus on ur life.



There are billions of girls everywhere who are even prettier nd better dan her.

13 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by Nobody: 2:42pm On Nov 22, 2015
THEN GET ONE

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by MrHighSea: 2:53pm On Nov 22, 2015
ONE MAN SQUAD SURE PASS

3 Likes

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by Anikishaya(f): 3:02pm On Nov 22, 2015
Mr Op, let's start from here,
1. Are u married? If yes, i tink a good wife should be able to stand by her husband through thick n thin. I was once in her shoes, cos it's always frustrating seeing ur friends doing good as a lady n u can't get along with them.
2. Is she just a fiancee? If yes, try n explain to her that rome is not built in a day, she should please bear along with you, cos those days when my guy was searching, I fought him everyday also but power has finally changed hands.
Finally, if you love her, talk to her n make her see things in your direction and make sure she's busy also, so that she can help u in situations like this
I rest my case..

16 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by mercythrone(m): 3:06pm On Nov 22, 2015
Sir, though I may be wrong, I think you got her consent to marry you by impressing her with outward and monetary things. Your grip as a husband isn't yet firm on her, I dont mean being harsh but her respecting and giving you the expected reverence.

You made a mistake by closing the shop in your home town and permitting her to relocate to Abuja. You even went there with her. Abuja is difficult to cope with when there isn't tangible source of earning. Sir! Be the decision maker please, and dont allow her to push you in doing things beyond your means.

Nothing spoil sir, just be focused in getting a new job. Dont get weighed down by her threatenings, allow her to do what she pleases, dont try to impress her. If she loves you she will stay.

Be focused on getting something to earn a living. On a final note, this isn't a licence to divorce her. Just give her sometime, she's gonna adjust.

46 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by Erums(m): 3:10pm On Nov 22, 2015
well I think you made some harsh decisions like marrying before getting a job, And moving to abj wen you cant boast of a constant income,


live within your means, don't let a woman dictate for you just like that
be a man.....
use ur brains,

now u suffering .....Bt It's not too late, ...make serious efforts to get a job or start sometin also pray....watch her make treats And ultimatum just concur And watch....

#lifelessons

18 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by butanep(m): 3:10pm On Nov 22, 2015
End time women...

If she is really your wife, she won't threaten you based on your predicament. Try to talk to her but if she refuses, let her go.

The job search is not easy when you are with some End time women. They even make you frustrated and depressed.


I don't know why some guyz get married when they don't have stable job or something tangible.

Sorry you have a materialistic and lazy girl like my ex...

End time women only love you when you are glowing...

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by fm7070: 3:39pm On Nov 22, 2015
i don't think that woman is meant for you in the first place.
from experience, i think you should fight for your own head and survival first
it is very difficult when you are out of job and your wife is not supportive morally and psychologically
you could have been running that salon/barbing by yourself until you get a better job, I believe the salon can even grow bigger
earning 20k as a graduate is arrant nonsense. You can't get job under pressure, employers don't like to employ desperate people.
she may end up in another man's arm if this joblessness persist.
I just pray God will guide you to the right path

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by fm7070: 3:41pm On Nov 22, 2015
butanep:
End time women...
If she is really your wife, she won't threaten you based on your predicament. Try to talk to her but if she refuses, let her go.
The job search is not easy when you are with some End time women. They even make you frustrated and depressed.
I don't know why some guyz get married when they don't have stable job or something tangible.
Sorry you have a materialistic and lazy girl like my ex...
End time women only love you when you are glowing...

Pls do not castigate the guy for marrying without stable job.
is marriage all about bearing the woman's burden.
Men are not burden bearer. We want partners. Not some lazy woman who wants magic overnight

35 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by butanep(m): 3:57pm On Nov 22, 2015
fm7070:


Pls do not castigate the guy for marrying without stable job.
is marriage all about bearing the woman's burden.
Men are not burden bearer. We want partners. Not some lazy woman who wants magic overnight


I am not blaming the guy.


I am only angry about the kind of wife he married and for carelessly following the wife decision.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by KOLZY(m): 4:26pm On Nov 22, 2015
Humanly... You would just tell her to leave and find a way to get money/job any how
Or you find a way to get money/job and let her stay
Or maybe better still you just....

Anyway, just know this is your cross, I'm not married and done have any experience with it, but what I know is, in times like this just stay true to God, If na work, you go get am, she just have to understand that for anybody to really succeed, times for suffering would come.

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by femidejulius(m): 4:26pm On Nov 22, 2015
Wives ought to stay with husband through thin and thick. Marriage is supposed to be for better for worst. If your wife wants to leave you, don't beg her to stay.

However, we must not be quick to condemn her as this is just a side of the story. What's she doing to help your finances? How have you been coping without job for months? Has she been helping? Have you been appreciative of her? Etc etc.

5 Likes

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by alterswerve(m): 4:33pm On Nov 22, 2015
Mehn. This is a sad situation

Well... Your wife is not your life.. Even if they rhyme (haha)

If she wants to go, let her go.

And if you want to revenge, be successful

Its really sad. OP wasn't jobless when he got her a shop and rented an apartment na. She is PROBABLY the cause of this as she was the initiator of the move to Abuja. Why couldn't she stay in the home town where he got a job for her?

OP, you have a lot to achieve in life, and if your wife won't stand by you, God will, for he desires your success even more than you do

7 Likes

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by menix(m): 4:33pm On Nov 22, 2015
OP I don't need to coat words for you cous the world is military..

U re married to a Gold Saw Dust digger, guy if am in ur shoe I swear to God, I will ask her to hasten up..

What kind of end time woman did u marry
She might even be ur stumbling block cous u married the wrong person..

I pray God remembers you fast.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by Icecomrade: 4:38pm On Nov 22, 2015
I think it was a mistake marrying her in the first place.
Let her go and focus on yourself.

When you dream job arrives you well have mini skirt chicks think to get you attention

1 Like

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by looseweight: 4:38pm On Nov 22, 2015
Ok
Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by TATROVERT: 4:38pm On Nov 22, 2015
Then find a JOB
Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by allanphash7(m): 4:38pm On Nov 22, 2015
Ur wife or gf?




If she is your wife quit her

If she is your gf quit her

1 Like 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by yomalex(m): 4:38pm On Nov 22, 2015
Hmm
Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by Gombs(m): 4:39pm On Nov 22, 2015
relax...


pray!.. no one likes a sit-at-home man! Even if it's car wash, start one... and keep the "I'm a graduate" gist away from your mind.

cheers.

9 Likes

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by englishmart(m): 4:39pm On Nov 22, 2015
if you love her, then find a job. A man who can't provide for the family is worse than an infidel

23 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by TOPCRUISE(m): 4:39pm On Nov 22, 2015
End time wife, useless good for nothing wife, gold digger wife.

But OP what did you see in her by marrying her in the first. As in the criteria and attributes you find in her that made you decide is a wife material. Don't tell me you did not see this coming when you married her

1 Like

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by HungerBAD: 4:39pm On Nov 22, 2015
There are 3 sides to a story.

Your side.

Her side.

The side of the truth.

Let us go with your side of the story. Women, especially married women don't just wake up and tell their husband's they are leaving them just like that, even if things get rough for the men.

Most especially if the Marriage is relatively still new like yours. Which brings me to the question, are you guys legally married?Nigerians after doing introduction are quick to claim her/him as wife and husband, or another Kind of Nigeria marriage is she moves in with you when she gets pregnant and later they start calling themselves husband and wife.

That said.

If she insists on leaving you because you are going through a rough time, then it could be for a couple of reasons:

(1) The life you promised her before she agreed to marry you is not forth coming.
(2)She sees you like the Lazy type not willing to be a goal getter
(3)She is seeing or has eyes for somebody else
(4)She might not mean it, but say it as a way for you to put more effort in getting something.

Yesterday, we read the story of a Mathematics Graduate turned Armed Robber. It is pressures like this that push men into doing things, a graduate ordinarily should not be doing.

But, again i blame you. You just finished NYSC last year and immediately you got married?marriage is not the way you read about it on the Mills and Boons Romance Novel. Marriage is the reality of life, and not some fiction book. You should have been ready, financially, morally, mentally and physically before going into it.

Sadly, if she wants to go, then she was never meant to be yours, so let her go, especially if kids are not involved. It might be the opportunity you need to even get yourself together.

12 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job by Leez(m): 4:40pm On Nov 22, 2015
tallfish145:
I graduated in 2012 and had my NYSC in 2014 but since then getting a meaning job has been a major challenge for me. Though after my NYSC,I opened an hair dressing salon for my wife in my hometown but after few months,she asked if we can relocate to abuja(where we met). After so many pressures from her,she moved to Abuja sometime in March,2015 and i later joined her in April after she secured an apartment i paid for. I stayed idle(after many job search) for two months before i got somewhere(through nairaland). As a graduate,i was earning 20k per month and transportation to work in month cost about 9-10k. Due to stress,i left the place after 3months. Now,this is November, no job and my wife is threatening to leave me,for reason that she hasn't experience hardship when she was alone. Please advice me on what to do friends.
seun abeg all ds fantasy story should go to fiction section na hiaaaaan
i tire o

1 Like

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (Reply)

"I Will Die, If I Give My Wife Money" - Man Tells Lagos Court / RELOCATION SALE: PLOT OF LAND WITH GERMAN FLOOR. I OWN IT! / 30 Habits That Show Improper Upbringing Of Children

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 47
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.