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Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by KELVIN086: 11:40am On May 28, 2016 |
Silkmoth33:John share ur own experience , who do u like better ur dad or mom. As for me I love my dad way more. |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by obowunmi(m): 11:46am On May 28, 2016 |
Many people's parents were sadists. Looks like your dad is not an exception. |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by cocktopuss: 12:07pm On May 28, 2016 |
My dad denied me from birth.... said i was too fair...lol. never paid my fees, never bought me a biscuit... but do i hate him? No! My life is too good to be bitter... i can only be thankful to my mum for being strong for me... He is claiming he has a correct son now though. Just leave the bitterness and embrace greatness. Everyone will rally round.... the journey is just starting.... until i get my mum a big house in lekki im not heaving a sigh of relief yet..... Maybe i wont beat my kids when i have them though from the trend im seeing on this thread. 1 Like |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by haymoney01(m): 12:25pm On May 28, 2016 |
tayooluwole:Same here bro... I do not hate him o but I no dey like make he dey around |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by Swaggerlomo: 12:41pm On May 28, 2016 |
When would u nw lyk I'm,is it when his died already?FOOL |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by tntcorps(m): 12:47pm On May 28, 2016 |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by Nobody: 12:59pm On May 28, 2016 |
omonnakoda: Beautiful comment! please pm me. i'll love us to be e-friends:-) |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by shaybebaby(f): 1:00pm On May 28, 2016 |
favourmic:There are ways to correct a child. But hitting shouldn't be one of them. It is nothing but inflicting pain(physical and emotional) and does nothing to address why you believe the offence is wrong. Let the punishment relate to the offence but also take time to explain why they are being punished. With my child, I simply take away whatever privileges he has at that moment. Yes some kids can push your buttons but when I see myself about to react in anger, I walk away before I lash out and hurt him. Only when I have calmed down do I address the behaviour. You hit your child, you are only teaching them to solve problems with violence. We have to think about the message we want them to take forward. Help them understand why the action is wrong rather than simply communicating that they are wrong. 2 Likes |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by Nobody: 1:25pm On May 28, 2016 |
You should be thanking ur God and him for sticking around,he probably wanted the best for you and didn't want to see you go astray. Go ask those that their dad was never around e.g tupac shakur. I just saw a thread similar to what I was trying say.so I tot I should modify my post. See pic below for the thread.
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Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by Nobody: 1:29pm On May 28, 2016 |
shaybebaby: You so sound like my wife.what privilege does average Africa child have? |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by yanabasee(m): 1:37pm On May 28, 2016 |
nikkypearl: Nikky... You've almost said my mind... @airforce1 .... You will be a father somehow and you'll beat ur child when he's either wrong or not and he'll not see it as a punishment but as hatred... You have to let go whatever your father did to you and be in harmony with him..... Call him and be free.. Else, you will regret somehow if u realised that u hated him for nothing! I dnt think your dad will jst beat u when u've not done somfin wrong! 1 Like |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by sugarbeesmith(m): 1:47pm On May 28, 2016 |
Gofwane:i got to love him on his dying bed.i couldn't take it seeing him struggle to live...I still regret not loving him.blood is always be thicker than water 1 Like |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by sugarbeesmith(m): 1:51pm On May 28, 2016 |
qoura123:bros I bet if he dies you will live to remember him someday and ud wished u were close to him |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by GloriaNinja(f): 2:02pm On May 28, 2016 |
tntcorps:and I don't think you are brainy enough to quote me. |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by Nobody: 2:05pm On May 28, 2016 |
Airforce1: We are in the same boat. I thought I was the only one. My friends with wonderful dads keep advising me to forgive him but little do they know that the issue has nothing to do with forgiveness, we just can't be close. I just can't call him and I just don't care about him. |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by qoura123(m): 2:07pm On May 28, 2016 |
sugarbeesmith:no bro it just natural blood is thicker than water hell no. the blood of friendship (cult) is thicker than water (from the womb) if he dies I pay a visit bury him move on sikena |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by favouryemmy: 2:22pm On May 28, 2016 |
@Airforce 1. Congrats for letting us know what you are doing to yourself. It could actually turn out to be to your good if you listen to kind advice. You people going around hating anyone including your fathers, remember you will be someone's parent someday. What goes around comes around. I had reasons to dislike my dad also but I didn't have a choice but to forgive him, cos he's my dad and I couldn't have come to this world without him. I confronted him one day and he wasn't happy but I freed my mind of what I was carrying inside and became free. My dads only way of correction was flogging and I didn't improve until he changed his methods to advising me. He also kept comparing me to my cousins that usually do better than me in school for instance. Bros, free yourself. Tell your dad what is going on inside of you and begin your healing process. Tell him in the way he will understand. If you don't do this, you will see the long term effects of grudge. And it's not a good thing. Good luck! |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by shaybebaby(f): 3:25pm On May 28, 2016 |
euromilion:You'll be amazed. It's a matter of taking something "THEY" like away. My child for instance likes to tell me when to shower and I humour him because I find it funny, like he is the shower police. Any ways, it was bedtime and he had just had his shower and as usual was like" mummy shower". He had been naughty during his shower, tipping water over the floor and generally being a little terror. So of course when the usual order came, I refused. No point in rewarding bad behaviour with nice mummy who generally runs around trying to please him. You should have seen the tears that day , one would think he would have preferred it if I had smacked him. Needless to say, it worked a treat. Actually his reaction made me laugh but if I had smacked him, it wouldn't have hit home where it should have. 2 Likes |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by Nobody: 4:10pm On May 28, 2016 |
You stories are just infinitesimal compared to mine. My dad was a monster. Still a monster. I became short-sighted due to one of his beatings. I was filled with fear anytime I was sleeping. I couldn't sleep deep for abt 10 yrs of my life. He was a Pharaoh in my life. Also very fetish (he is a pastor too, dt makes me laff). There are some tins I can't just type here. I can write a story about him and it will make a hit. Sorry terrible a father. 1 Like |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by omonnakoda: 4:27pm On May 28, 2016 |
AnalyticEngine:The issue is not really forgiving him. I think that is where people get confused. First of all what does it mean to forgive a person. Imagine if you have a driver that drinks a lot. You sack him and he comes back to plead and you forgive him but he is still a drinker would you reemploy him? So forgiveness is not about getting close and going out partying together. Forgiving is a process of SELF PURIFICATION. Failure to forgive often manifests in dreams one way or another. Infact it is not only others we need to forgive. We need to forgive ourselves too. There are many things we have all done small and big for which we have not forgiven ourselves and may not even be aware of .On the other hand there are times when we believe we have forgiven others and we really have not.Whatever ma be the case unless in situations where we can actually inflict suffering on the offender Our forgiveness is irrelevant to them. We must understand that our mind and our bodies are continuations one of the other and failure to forgive can result in physical illnesses in fact Jesus spoke of forgiveness before prayer or something like that.Funny I am quoting Jesus as I am an Ifa adherent. If you have difficulty forgiving a particular person and it causes difficulty you can perform some rituals e.g coconut breaking or prayer to cleanse yourself, for the concretely minded otherwise contemplation and meditation should do. In other to forgive you must persuade yourself that somehow whatever offence was committed was committed by you or AS IF by you and that you are the one in need of forgiveness. i.e empathizing with the offender. This is a profound psychological task and that is why people rarely forgive even though they claim to have done so The end result of forgiveness should be a state of mind where you feel compassion and understanding for the offender but also you must acquire something in the process.The knowledge that people including yourself are weak and fallible and that you too offend and need forgiveness too. There is no forgiveness without forgiving and so on. |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by Nobody: 5:07pm On May 28, 2016 |
shaybebaby: I know it works,but not in Africa,African kids has no privilege,I can't remember anything that my parents could've taken away from me then. I however do use your method on my kids,because they've things that I could take away. But as for average African kids,all I could say is Lord have mercy.some African parents are so poor,that all they've is their kids. |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by shaybebaby(f): 5:22pm On May 28, 2016 |
euromilion:That just made me sad. Broke my heart |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by Nobody: 5:44pm On May 28, 2016 |
shaybebaby: I know it's sad,but that's the life we are living on,bad politicians in Africa are the cause,not me or you. All me and you can do is to try and educate people around us,especially those in Africa,not to have kids if they can't afford it. Shalom. 1 Like |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by free2ryhme: 6:03pm On May 28, 2016 |
MsFaith: And you think anyone online will have pity on you? Go on share, you are only given them the ammunition to use against you |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by free2ryhme: 6:06pm On May 28, 2016 |
cocktopuss: I may not know you but from you comment it showed you are one of the few mature minds here. You post is deep Thank you |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by favourmic(m): 6:42pm On May 28, 2016 |
[quote author=shaybebaby post=46050068] There are ways to correct a child. But hitting shouldn't be one of them. It is nothing but inflicting pain(physical and emotional) and does nothing to address why you believe the offence is wrong. Let the punishment relate to the offence but also take time to explain why they are being punished. With my child, I simply take away whatever privileges he has at that moment. Yes some kids can push your buttons but when I see myself about to react in anger, I walk away before I lash out and hurt him. Only when I have calmed down do I address the behaviour. You hit your child, you are only teaching them to solve problems with violence. We have to think about the message we want them to take forward. Help them understand why the action is wrong rather than simply communicating that they are wrong.[/quote Then why the Bible say A child's heart has a tendency to do wrong, but the rod of discipline removes it far away from him. I remember back in school I used to came late then, even never too serious about my studies my highest scored is 4/10 during our test, but when this teacher Mr Lash take over my life never remain the same although I don't like him then but no I always pray for him and want to do more for him. |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by Anas09: 7:25pm On May 28, 2016 |
Airforce1:If you see how I rush to come read weytin your gather do you enh. |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by Nobody: 7:50pm On May 28, 2016 |
omonnakoda: Nice one. |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by Blackfire(m): 7:57pm On May 28, 2016 |
Hmmm father's love.. I promise when i ve my own kids i will give them all the love in the world. I will make sure none of them repeat my mistakes.. And in all the places my father ve had his short comings towards me, i will learn from it to better my kids life. Unfortunately when u disdain your parents, as u grow up u find yourself doing exactly the samething. |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by MsFaith: 8:01pm On May 28, 2016 |
free2ryhme: but you are funny o. He came online to share his pain, you are suppose to advice him not criticise him. Even on this same thread, people are speaking up and testifying to the kind of hatred they built for their parents over the years. What would you say about those that came to seek advice over some issues? 1 Like |
Re: I Didnt Like My Dad When I Was A Kid And Still Dont Like Him Now I'm Grown Up by salt1: 8:26pm On May 28, 2016 |
naijaboiy: I actually think op did the right thing by pouring out his hidden pain in an anonymous forum. We can't continue to live in pretence. See how many others have been encouraged by his frankness to open up on their own hurt. There are ladies who can't ever muster the courage to inform their mothers how they were sexually abused by their fathers Admitting that there is a problem is the first step toward healing. My own father! I don't want to go there but my siblings and I decided to be everything he was not. So evil behavior isn't genetic. 2 Likes |
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