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My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated - Family (4) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated (60837 Views)

My Fiancée Has Stopped Picking My Calls, Please Advise Me On What To Do / "Some Call It Incest, We Call It Fate" - Man Who Impregnates His Sister Says / Irish Woman Devastated After Nigerian Husband Dumped Her Destroys Shop (Video) (2) (3) (4)

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Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by Nobody: 10:49pm On Mar 28, 2017
ok, let me be the badt guy here, every time you see her YOU WILL REMEMBER THAT SAID RELATIONSHIP. so better think about your next step very well. We wont want you to be disturbing ir neighbors with constant quarreling every day.

God!!!! my trust in women keeps waning

It happened once, it will happen again

1 Like

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by CarlosTheJackal: 10:50pm On Mar 28, 2017
Evaberry:



why will I be ashamed when he gave me the best Bleep in my life

3 Likes

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by jakandeola(m): 10:50pm On Mar 28, 2017
MIB1:


Long before we met .. About 6 yrs ago

Maybe pained is not.the right word

I'm just scared of the spiritual aspect like curses or something besides I know I will never have any good relationship with that cousin of hers
sex her den dump her

1 Like

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by CarlosTheJackal: 10:51pm On Mar 28, 2017
Evaberry:
op marry her jhur

I dated my cousin back then but I'm still living well

what of countries like China that cousins get married to each other.

nothing wrong in dating cousins
Iberibe

3 Likes

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by linearity: 10:52pm On Mar 28, 2017
Why are people bringing spiritual angles into this? I can't remember any Bible verse condemning sleeping with cousins.

If you believe in the Bible's procreation story, our great grand parents were brothers and sisters as in the same father, the same mother and the Bible is littered with plenty examples of cousins marrying each other.

Because of the genetic closeness of cousins or close relations, science frown at close relations birthing offersprings because of the possibilities of abnormalities, this was not done because of some spiritual discernment.

There is no different between her bleeping a complete stranger from outer space and her cousin, as far as the Bible or spiritual consequences are concern.

2 Likes

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by chuksjuve(m): 10:53pm On Mar 28, 2017
Alariwo2:


you're not wise

Even kings that God grants privilege to receive bow and worship of men which only He should have counsels

The bible also made mention of elders and living creatures serving as counsels to papa God Himself

so what's your point


and a public forum like nairaland is where you get the needed advise ?

what happened yo the elders and deacons of your church?
what happens to the Godly servants of God of your church?


remember the internet never forgets...

and to the Lady in question , how will she feel when she finds out that what she opened up to you in private has become a public gossip talk ...

now I see why the Bible said my people perish for lack of knowledge.

keep swimming in the ignorance of your twisted and perverted knowledge of the scriptures..

God have mercy on us..

1 Like

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by Nobody: 10:53pm On Mar 28, 2017
Thats her past...everybody has a past these days a dirty past. Even me cant claim to be a saint, so just go ahead with your wedding or better still follow your instinct
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by rinzylee(m): 10:54pm On Mar 28, 2017
Majikals:

You are right though but if she had stomached that secret like most people naturally would have done, and you heard it from a different source when you are already miles into the marriage, you will feel a 1000 times worse than how you are feeling now.
The ball is in your court chief.



Kai.... Shebi if we beg people to give their lives to Christ and stay Holy them no good gree.

Thank God for the reverential fear of God our parents put in us.


Forgive her, pray for her and Marry her. ...Relocate far away from that cousin if you can, it will help the memories obliterate.
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by viktimera(m): 10:54pm On Mar 28, 2017
[/quote]
AstuteJay:


Make no mistake about this brother, your woman made a smart move by telling you upfront. The relationship might be an open secret in her family and the fear it might eventually leak to you made her tell you upfront.

It happened just once........ Never fall for that crap! It must have happened a couple of times before they were caught and might happen again and again.

I had a similar experience; she told me upfront an uncle "raped" her, she got pregnant, it was aborted and all that. I was moved by her sincerity and took her to the altar. I eventually got to know she consented to it and it happened so many times! The fear it might get leaked to me overtime made her tell me upfront. The uncle was late before we met though, but mere thought of the affair is a bitter pill till tomorrow.

You may feel it doesn't matter now but 30 years from now, you might still be feeling bad about it.

Make a better choice!
[quote author=AstuteJay post=54956972]

Make no mistake about this brother, your woman made a smart move by telling you upfront. The relationship might be an open secret in her family and the fear it might eventually leak to you made her tell you upfront.

It happened just once........ Never fall for that crap! It must have happened a couple of times before they were caught and might happen again and again.

I had a similar experience; she told me upfront an uncle "raped" her, she got pregnant, it was aborted and all that. I was moved by her sincerity and took her to the altar. I eventually got to know she consented to it and it happened so many times! The fear it might get leaked to me overtime made her tell me upfront. The uncle was late before we met though, but mere thought of the affair is a bitter pill till tomorrow.

You may feel it doesn't matter now but 30 years from now, you might still be feeling bad about it.

Make a better choice!
AstuteJay:


Make no mistake about this brother, your woman made a smart move by telling you upfront. The relationship might be an open secret in her family and the fear it might eventually leak to you made her tell you upfront.

It happened just once........ Never fall for that crap! It must have happened a couple of times before they were caught and might happen again and again.

I had a similar experience; she told me upfront an uncle "raped" her, she got pregnant, it was aborted and all that. I was moved by her sincerity and took her to the altar. I eventually got to know she consented to it and it happened so many times! The fear it might get leaked to me overtime made her tell me upfront. The uncle was late before we met though, but mere thought of the affair is a bitter pill till tomorrow.

You may feel it doesn't matter now but 30 years from now, you might still be feeling bad about it.

Make a better choice!
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by Bollinger(m): 10:54pm On Mar 28, 2017
MIB1:


Long before we met .. About 6 yrs ago

Maybe pained is not.the right word

I'm just scared of the spiritual aspect like curses or something besides I know I will never have any good relationship with that cousin of hers

Your fiance talks too much. Know this; There are some things in your past that you must never let your spouse know. Most couples cannot handle it. You for instance are a prime example based on your reaction. If my wife knew about half the crap i did when i was sowing my wild oats she would probably have a heart attack. I don't want to know what she did in the past and she is smart enough not to ask me of mine. We've been married almost two decades. cool Whatever mistakes your fiance made in the past stays in the past. What matters is who she is today.

8 Likes

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by notoriousbabe: 10:54pm On Mar 28, 2017
TonyeBarcanista:
i get, come and take it
na cucumber I dey talk no be no be three month old baby prick wet day under you

1 Like

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by Omoluabi16(m): 10:55pm On Mar 28, 2017
whizqueen is viewing.
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by Coolgent(m): 10:56pm On Mar 28, 2017
Chai this is first time of hearing marrying ur cousin is incest!
Anyway different religion+culture.
Op go ahead and marry her
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by babzo(m): 10:56pm On Mar 28, 2017
Shes guility of some things- but not incest. Incest according to the Bible is brothers and sisters. Parents. Parents of spouse.
Sex and marriage with cousins is permitted in many cultures and frowned upon by many others. In no culture or country is it incest. Bad in many places- but not incest.
There are some advice you dont seek from the marketplace.
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by olawonder(m): 10:56pm On Mar 28, 2017
With cousin is not so bad my friend. Most ppl hv experienced this, u know like during sleep overs and so on. No biggie just ignore and continue to nurture d love u hv for each other.
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by Amajerry83(m): 10:56pm On Mar 28, 2017
Although it's bad it happened buy what has happened has happened. Since you can't change it just learn to love her more and forget she never said that.
But women can be funny. How could she even think of telling you that. If you were to be some guys na the end of the relationship be that o.

1 Like

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by Nobody: 10:56pm On Mar 28, 2017
Evaberry:
op marry her jhur

I dated my cousin back then but I'm still living well

what of countries like China that cousins get married to each other.

nothing wrong in dating cousins
Knowingly or unknowingly?
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by blaqroy: 10:57pm On Mar 28, 2017
Nothing will happen, she was so naive then and has realized her mistakes and asked God for forgiveness and what if you got to know after marrying her? Plz continue ur wedding plans
MIB1:


Long before we met .. About 6 yrs ago

Maybe pained is not.the right word

I'm just scared of the spiritual aspect like curses or something besides I know I will never have any good relationship with that cousin of hers

2 Likes

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by bfire(m): 10:57pm On Mar 28, 2017
MIB1:
My fiancee confided in me two days ago that she had an incest relationship with her cousin yrs back. She said she told me cos she loves me and wouldn't want to hide anything from me. I love her too and still want to marry her but I am devastated by the news

She said she has fasted and asked God for forgiveness.

I have prayed on her behalf too severally,

I am supposed to come to Nigeria for our wedding next month . pls help nairalanders. I feel so pained . I need wise counsel .

Let me be frank with you.

The moment you become taken by sentiment, events or pity
you already lose the most important aspect of a relationship
as it relates to marriage.

Whatever you read here won't help; no matter how you're swayed
by the respondent.

The only thing and one way only that will secure your 'home'
is to be sure what God is telling you about your marriage.

Never be taken by human feelings; it will fail you.
Many are the devices of the devil. You don't know which one you
are presently been tempted with.

I say again, only you can pray and solve this important decision
you are about to take.

Becareful. Shalom

3 Likes

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by kayo80(m): 10:58pm On Mar 28, 2017
Evaberry:
op marry her jhur

I dated my cousin back then but I'm still living well

what of countries like China that cousins get married to each other.

nothing wrong in dating cousins

Were you first cousins or second cousins?
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by Okwyjesus(m): 10:58pm On Mar 28, 2017
Majikals:
You are a lucky man finding such an honest spouse... She has confessed her errors before her maker and even you. Go ahead with your marriage with her cos she's a good woman. We have all made terrible errors at some point in life. Only a scarce few are bold enough to confess his /her deepest errors the way ur fiancee just did.
About the spiritual implications u are kinda worried about, if truly you are a Christian as u rightly said, I believe the Bible says he /she that confesses and believe is redeemed..You have nothing to fear

I stopped reading comments when met this one above. Well said no plus no minus
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by Alariwo2: 10:58pm On Mar 28, 2017
chuksjuve:



and a public forum like nairaland is where you get the needed advise ?

what happened yo the elders and deacons of your church?
what happens to the Godly servants of God of your church?


remember the internet never forgets...

and to the Lady in question , how will she feel when she finds out that what she opened up to you in private has become a public gossip talk ...

now I see why the Bible said my people perish for lack of knowledge.

keep swimming in the ignorance of your twisted and perverted knowledge of the scriptures..

God have mercy on us..

the best of advice can come from the strangest of places and not the deacons or what have you

omode gbon agba gbon lafi da otu Ife.. Don't underrate Nairaland or the internet at large.

Nobody sabi pass
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by blaqroy: 10:58pm On Mar 28, 2017
Hope you are not stupid
jakandeola:
sex her den dump her

2 Likes

Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by TonyeBarcanista(m): 10:59pm On Mar 28, 2017
notoriousbabe:
na cucumber I dey talk no be no be three month old baby prick wet day under you
Na cucumber I want give you na
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by BrainnewsNg(f): 10:59pm On Mar 28, 2017
LeView1:
I guess this is cultural differences. I don't believe a cousin is incest so I can't advice you on it other than to say, forgiveness is the only solution.

Please respect my understanding and don't argue my truth with me.

Please, where are you from?
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by Ekiseme(m): 11:00pm On Mar 28, 2017
Nso Ala!


Tufiakwa!
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by notoriousbabe: 11:00pm On Mar 28, 2017
TonyeBarcanista:
Na cucumber I want give you na
give lala
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by BrainnewsNg(f): 11:01pm On Mar 28, 2017
Joavid:
This thread is a lesson. never do things you will regret or that will jeopardise your future.

I'm wondering though, why someone would sleep with their cousin.

Ladies and surprises are like abc
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by Gfish: 11:01pm On Mar 28, 2017
Grow up. you have a good woman. What if she didnt tell you. people make mistakes expecially when they young. The good thing is she knows she has sinned against God and asked for his forgiveness and she has her peace. with the way you think i dont think you are the righy guy to handle a Godly matured woman like your fiancee
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by odogwu2007(m): 11:03pm On Mar 28, 2017
MIB1:
My fiancee confided in me two days ago that she had an incest relationship with her cousin yrs back. She said she told me cos she loves me and wouldn't want to hide anything from me. I love her too and still want to marry her but I am devastated by the news

She said she has fasted and asked God for forgiveness.

I have prayed on her behalf too severally,

I am supposed to come to Nigeria for our wedding next month . pls help nairalanders. I feel so pained . I need wise counsel .
bros u well at all? U are pained about what she did in the past? What of your own past? She was so kind to even tell you now u treat her like this? U need help. That's why some people just keep there past to there self.
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by blaqroy: 11:04pm On Mar 28, 2017
MIB1:
My fiancee confided in me two days ago that she had an incest relationship with her cousin yrs back. She said she told me cos she loves me and wouldn't want to hide anything from me. I love her too and still want to marry her but I am devastated by the news

She said she has fasted and asked God for forgiveness.

I have prayed on her behalf too severally,
Take this to mamalet on Facebook, they will hide ur ID and load you with nice advice,peoples comments here are something else....but to me, plz move on,she never continued in the act

I am supposed to come to Nigeria for our wedding next month . pls help nairalanders. I feel so pained . I need wise counsel .
Re: My Fiancée Had An Incest Relationship With Her Cousin Years Back, I'm Devastated by ChiefSweetus: 11:04pm On Mar 28, 2017
Ugh! One of the worst things ever, I know;

But, her telling you is the ULTIMATE SIGN OF LOVE AND RESPECT.

I'd find it hard to betray such trust and intimacy. Let her speak to the cousin, and let him know that you have been made aware. If he is sensible, he will keep away FOREVER. If he is stupid however, the onus is on your wife to inform him that his everlasting distance would be appreciated, nay, REQUIRED.

Wife her bro. Many other girls will take such a secret to the grave with them, and a woman who can keep secrets from her lover will commit more secrets. You have a real one - take it from a cynic who has seen it all.

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