Davindal:
Madam you are very stupid and evil to have cheated on your husband. What the Bleep are you telling us? Listen and listen good, you adulterous woman; of you don't confess to your husband, God will punish you Idiot to death.

Madam...See, I reject your type as my future wife...God forbid! God knows, that I have vowed to be 100% faithful to any woman that I finally Settle down with in marriage.

Paradventure my future wife cheats on me, God forbid oo, I will have no option than to spray and riddle her body with hot bullets. Yes, I will kill her, for she has sinned against me and God.

Let me state it again, I hate evil, and wouldn't want evil to be meted out to me. Once I become married, I promised God that I would never look at any other woman other than my wife. When I go on business trip, I shall go on maximum trust that my wife would never cheat on me in my absence, and I shall give her my very sincere assurance and confidence that am not gonna cheat on her, no matter the circumstance. I shall, let her know in all honesty that whenever I emback on any trip, be it biz tour, Church Programm, military oriented tour, etc, that it is 100% concentration on what I am traveling for.
Even now that I am single, though, I keep female friends biz each time I try meeting other girls aside my Main girl, I find it difficult being in their company. I Do feel deep sense of guilt, that I often regret ever stepping out with any other girl, because when I love it is 100%. If my love, a 19yr old, decides to cheat on me, good. I won't touch her, because I have yet to marry her. But once, I get married to her, and start getting information that she cheats on me; I wouldn't react. I would just have to hold my Chills till I confirm and catch her red-Händed in the act..., and once my type do...y'all know what? She will have to pay wiff her life...simple.

Guys Don't get me wrong. I am calm, and reserved but not foolish. I am very hot-tempered(ill-tempered). I love instant Justice, hence dont hasitate to serving it instanta to err-pins.

I am a 25 yr old man, and my girl is already aware of my attributes. I told her that once we are married, it gonna be strictly on both of us, and no one else, that then should she do anyhow(cheat), am no gonna hasitate in taking her out, including the idiat that gonna be with her on that, God forbid, ill-fated day, because in my own path, I shall be a faithful and loving husband that surd gonna be the envy of other ladies. I made her understand that she is free to go her separate now, If she knows that she no gonna play by marital rules when the time comes, but she obliged and promised that such will never happen. Now we are good to go in highest 2yrs time from now.

As for you Madam...go and die, you slut. #NONSENSE!!!

You are insane! Olorikori! You will kill someone's daughter because you are too weak, fickle and stupid to control your self and your Yaba left emotions?

I will join hand in stoning you to death (a deserved jungle justice). Haba, re-read the shitt you wrote up there. Don't ever get into a relationship as you are mad and dangerous. Are you sure you are not a mental patient?

istoctober:


l did it once and since then, l have not been myself. l have a feeling of "your sins will surely find you out" and is hunting me now. ls been two years now but l don't have peace.

women and cheating are like 4 and 5..Believe me if its in my village,u must be mad by Now.
When ever a woman cheats from my Village and cooks for the Husband mits either the man fall sick and die,that is if he knows or the woman will die too.
99% of woman that cheat are from a village that has no Law or Nso.
Only the grace of God saves a woman from Cheating!!!!!! Even the married ones cheat most.

istoctober:


I don't want to go into details but l have no right to cheat on my spouse no matter what... l guess l was confused and l have learnt my lesson.

nothing can stop u from cheating,believe me..:the issue of Being Promiscious is in your Blood.
Ur daughters will all do the same.

istoctober:


I don't want to go into details but l have no right to cheat on my spouse no matter what... l guess l was confused and l have learnt my lesson.

nothing can stop u from cheating,believe me..:the issue of Being Promiscious is in your Blood.
Ur daughters will all do the same.

I can feel ur pains. Pls forgive yourself. Ask God to direct you in your next step. Unfortunately for you, your husband is not a good Christian (he can not easily forgive). If you want to continue being his wife don't make mistake of confessing to him cos he will definitely send you packing if you do.

istoctober:
l had to open this account to tell this story and l know that l will be bashed for this but l really need to get it off my chest.
it was in 2014, that l cheated on him and since then, l have not been myself. l have confessed to Pastors but l can't forget it and my mind keep telling me that God has forgotten about me cos whenever l pray, l find it difficult to concentrate and that's why l want to confess to him.
l know he will send me packing because he said something like that to me and the fear is what is keeping me from confessing to him. l don't want to be disgraced out of my home cos my husband will definitely do it.
l can't blame him for my shortcomings but myself for allowing devil into my home.
l really need your advice for help.... You can curse me but l deserve it for being a loose woman but l seriously need help cos depression wants to take over my life that l think of suicide to escape shame and mockery from people in case he finds out.

Read my lips! Never, do not tell your husband. Don't ever try it. If you try that will be the end of your marriage, even your own family will ridicule you. Everyone has sinned including your husband, but you don't see them confessing to anyone. Some things are better left untold. Nigeria men and their ego will never accept a cheating wife but will expect their wives to accept their cheating asses.

You have confessed to God, now it's time to move on with your life. Don't even look back, don't even think of the incident again. Some people have done worse but are still living happily.

For the sake of your sanity, do not I repeat keep this to yourself. If you must confess to him, do so on your 80th birthday.

MisterGrace:


It is better the husband know. That marriage is not scared anymore. Not until the man knows and deal with this in his soul.

Then maybe they can renew their covenant again. Only then can the sanctity and sacredness return.

This is the absolute truth. The man has the RIGHT to know, and the wife has the OBLIGATION to tell him.

She has already broken the marriage and the covenant between them.

istoctober:


l lost my three months preggy cos of my depreesion in Jan, 2016. Ever since, l have not been myself. l keep seeing myself as not worth living.
Each time l look at him, l have this guilty conscience that l have disappointed God and my parents. I cry in my lonely hours and it has made me to stay calm even in my right at home, l felt that l deserve everything that is happening to me.

i think u ve done penance urself and God has seen u re truely sorry, u ve confessed to ur pastor, go and sin no more.

Onegai:
Istoctober,

Please listen to me. You did it once right? Good.

CONFESS IN 4 MORE YEARS!

If you were a serial cheat or this affair had lasted 1 month long, I would make you confess tonight. Instead, you made a mistake. A stupid, selfish, thoughtless mistake. And you are paying for it. Good!

And let me be honest: ALL CHEATS DIE FROM GUILT. WHEN YOU FEEL GUILTY ABOUT SOMETHING, EVEN RAIN WILL LOOK LIKE PUNISHMENT. THAT GUILT IS PUNISHMENT FROM GOD.

Hallelujah. God never said you would commit a sin and He would forgive you and all would be groovy (which is what churches teach yoi), God said He would restore you, after you paid the price of your sin. You must pay the price but God has bought some of the debt. Like you owe the bank N250, 000 but your parents pay off N100, 000. If you don't pay the price, then there is no Justice in Heaven. Even men pay the price and the longer they sin, the more their debt is (it then spills into their kids).

You have taken Responsibility for your sin so in my book, you owe just like N80, 000. That's great news!

So, go to a women's group. That is whom you need, no more members of the male sexx to give you the emotional comfort you crave and you then cheat emotionally and physically, you did that the first time and have the scarlet letter branded on your head to show as a badge. Unburden yourself to your women's group (preferably this group is not related to your church, human beings can't keep their mouths shut). They will help you. They will help you and give you support while you pay off your debt. They will be there when you need the intimacy your husband is not giving. For now.

Next, identify every problem in your marriage. Starting with you. You must have felt no emotional satisfaction in your marriage (men are not taught how to marry, they are taught that paying schoolfees and rent and holiday and buying car = Great Husband). So, you need to work on identifying what you need. Then go get it from your husband. Say "I need you to spend time with me and not with UCL Juventus vs Barca" (boys, you can watch that football match later, don't neglect your wife for it). Tell him
"I feel secure when you come home early".
"I feel loved when you use soft words to correct me"
"I feel intelligent when you give me a chance to advise you"
"I feel sexy when you come into the kitchen and slap my arse when I'm cooking and leave again",
"I feel safe when you send me 5 messages during the day when you are at work because it feels like you think of me a lot",
"I feel Happy when you come home and unwind then join me on the couch because I feel like that means you love how you feel at home",
"I feel passionate when you see me looking unkempt and you push me into the bathroom, shower with me and insist on rubbing lotion on my body".

Don't even think of blaming him for this. You had a choice, you chose wrong. Same as he, had he cheated, he will have chosen wrongly.

From there, work on your relationship (notice I didn't say marriage, I said work on your relationship with your man). Fix you because you are the offending party (screw a wise woman buildeth whatever blah blah, a CEO builds his company, stop giving guys a free pass to fvckup their marriage till they turn 60 and old age and sickness suddenly gives them brain).

The offending party/cheating party starting to fix the marriage first means the marriage gets rebuilt in 5 years. The Betrayed party starting to fix the marriage first means the marriage gets rebuilt in 10 years. That's why most Nigerian wives tend to enjoy their marriage 10 years plus, not earlier.

Once you rebuild your marriage, THEN you can then confess and apologize. Because to apologize right now, you're only doing it to Unburden your guilt to him. Because it's too heavy, you're not confessing because you are wrong and want to make amends. You will feel a weight lifted off you but finalize the destruction you brought in his life. You will confess eventually, to clear yourself and be ready to keep apologizing for even 2 years.

So this sound like a plan? You got work to do girlie

Truly Awesome. Thanks for this beautiful post.
Op here is what you need. Read well and follow this advice

bitcoinvin:



nothing can stop u from cheating,believe me..:the issue of Being Promiscious is in your Blood.
Ur daughters will all do the same.

That's very harsh. Mr man, you sound as if you are without a single sin. You are not God, you can't define her or her kids

Better shut the f*uck up and make peace with your offense or move out and do your confession via phone before he beats you to pulp due to shattered ego.

istoctober:


it was with a pastor in one of the pentecostal churches and he is still living in the sin of adultery. l still hate myself and curse that day for the act l committed.
Thx for your words, it means alot to me now.

Hi October 1st, I having being following your topic keenly because I needed to know why you cheated. Women don't cheat for the same reasons as men. Women cheat.
1. With an Ex boyfriend they still have feelings for
2. For emotional need if they are in an abusive relationship
3. They fall victim to manipulative individuals (usually a boss or cleric).

When i saw you cheated with a Pastor, I just smiled. My dear you have not cheated, you were taken advantage of. You are a victim. A pawn in the hand of a manipulative man.

A few years ago my wife was a victim in the hand of a Priest. When I found out I took time to discuss at length with her to know why? If one doesn't tackle the why, then it sure to happen again. When I knew the why then it became easy for me to forgive. I had to run the Priest out of town (he was a foreigner) to break the spell he had on my wife. Cleric are highly manipulative people and the tragedy here is they make you think you are doing the right thing or they are bringing you closer to GOD.

Dear poster, you have conscience. That alone is a very good thing. And I can sense true repentance. My advice to you is don't tell your husband, recognize that you were a victim and not a cheat. I don't know your husband but what I know is 90% of men can't handle a cheating spouse. The knowledge will break him.

Don't confess to him.Do DAT to God alone and make sure ure genuinely repentant.if u do confess to him he will never forgive u and d outcome will be too bad.God forgives and forget but man can never forget though can pretend forgiveness. Be happy DT God had forgiven u never go back to sin for it kills.

Everyone has a secret they never and will never tell anyone till eternity
Not supporting you but if you must confess be ready to face the consequence from your husband, his family, your family, colleagues, friends, children and the entire world.

Why don't you pray to God, forgive yourself move ahead. Time heals every wound.

A friend of mine did it confessed to her well known cheating husband the man sent her packing instantly
.please be careful. This is s very delicate issue.

InvertedHammer:

/
Death is a finished project.
Love is an ongoing project.
If partners know all the secrets of their significant others, divorce rate will be greater than 95%.

She is not doing the husband any good by telling him.
Do you know why women confess to husbands/bfs after break up or in the heat of an argument? They intend to psychologically destroy their men.

It is her choice. She can tell her husband if she doesn't value her marriage. I feel that she is not remorseful. She is afraid because the husband mentioned "native doctor". Apparently she is immature. I will tell the native doctor to kiss my asz.
/

So she should hide the truth from her husband to reduce or manipulate divorce rate. The dishonesty must continue? This is new to me, meeeen!

She has broken the covenant with that man. The marriage is no more even if the status quo remains. The marriage is now a fraud since the other party (husband) is unaware that it has been invalidated by the wife's actions. The husband's ignorance is completely irrelevant.

The only way forward is full disclosure. With the best of luck they can perhaps rebuild and remake their bows and start afresh. The original marriage is DEAD!

famosh:

Restitution is not Christianity? Nawa for some I-too-know sha!

First and foremost, adultery and fornication is not permissible in Christianity. Therefore, I encourage married ones to be contented with the partners (one's husband or wife) and the singles to be patient. It saves a lot regrets.

The Restitution/Confession you are asking the woman to do is not Christianity. How many of your dirty crimes have you restituted?
One of your Holier- than -my- neighbour- brother quoted 'confess sin one to another' out of context to mean restitution on another thread. I was short of asking your gang members how often you have gone to your parents to confess all the evil you did away from home. Similar, to the foolish restitution of sending a second wife packing with her kids. Pentecostal overlords like the Pharisees are in the habit of digging out things out of context, yoking the gullible followers to laws and long lists of burdens.
I dislike hypocrisy most especially from holier- than -thou- gangs. You said the woman will not make Heaven, will go to the hell you created if she doesn't confess to the husband. I make bold to tell you that if there is any such hell that you make the rules for admission, then you are the number one on the admission lists for such hell.
Confessing sin to one another has nothing to do with Heaven or Hell, it is an advice that is intended to help people forestall a repeat of the sin and being an advice, when wrongly applied like confessing to the wrong person will give a disastrous outcome that the devil will wish for. And that is the case with this woman.

Sincerely sis, you need to prayerfully consider your action. Seek God's face in prayers and fasting to know what to do. If you're led by the Holy Spirit to tell him then do so, if not forgive yourself and move on with your life.

There have been lots of advice ahead of me for you. But my simple contribution is that if you want to make eternity, you will have to face your fear by telling him.
Pray and fast at least 3 days to hand over his spirit to God. You will be amazed at the outcome.
God bless you.

darlenese:
Dnt confess to him , try and forgive urself ,because God has forgive you . most men would cheat and won't evn confess or feel any remorse yet they still enjoy their marriage . ur life will become miserable if u confess.

hmmmm....what a heart

Confession is the best but 1st. You have to meet a good and trusted pastor on restitutes to him, fast and pray with you and after hearing from God will either invite or meet ur husband we you to discuss with him base on how God instruct him. He must hear from God 1st. Expect any reaction and remember that after the rain come sun shine.
"I feel secure when you come home early".
"I feel loved when you use soft words to correct me"
"I feel intelligent when you give me a chance to advise you"

Just like someone rightly say;[color=#990000][/color]

"I feel sexy when you come into the kitchen and slap my arse when I'm cooking and leave again",
"I feel safe when you send me 5 messages during the day when you are at work because it feels like you think of me a lot",
"I feel Happy when you come home and unwind then join me on the couch because I feel like that means you love how you feel at home",
"I feel passionate when you see me looking unkempt and you push me into the bathroom, shower with me and insist on rubbing lotion on my body".
May God help you.

Ijobaorun:
There have been lots of advice ahead of me for you. But my simple contribution is that if you want to make eternity, you will have to face your fear by telling him.
Pray and fast at least 3 days to hand over his spirit to God. You will be amazed at the outcome.
God bless you.

She will make eternity by God's GRACE, the precious Blood has washed away all her past mistakes.

You are Absolutely RIGHT.

negotiations2:
Don't confess to him.Do DAT to God alone and make sure ure genuinely repentant.if u do confess to him he will never forgive u and d outcome will be too bad.God forgives and forget but man can never forget though can pretend forgiveness. Be happy DT God had forgiven u never go back to sin for it kills.

victorDanladi:
You mean mallam won kiss like pastors

lol

GMbuharii:


luciferdevil,come see the begining of mental o

Mallam wan kiss! kwa

Lol, d guy wan finish himself with konji. Let him continue, Im waiting for him.

May God Bless you. I pray that she read and follow your Gospel advise. I was about a quart to cheat on my wife long time ago but the Word of God that bind us together hindered my foolish desire. I thank God that I didn't, if I did it I would have find myself where this lady is today but I would not disclose it to my wife. This lady has to MOVE on and be closer to God more than anything.

Pharaoh7:


Hi October 1st, I having being following your topic keenly because I needed to know why you cheated. Women don't cheat for the same reasons as men. Women cheat.
1. With an Ex boyfriend they still have feelings for
2. For emotional need if they are in an abusive relationship
3. They fall victim to manipulative individuals (usually a boss or cleric).

When i saw you cheated with a Pastor, I just smiled. My dear you have not cheated, you were taken advantage of. You are a victim. A pawn in the hand of a manipulative man.

A few years ago my wife was a victim in the hand of a Priest. When I found out I took time to discuss at length with her to know why? If one doesn't tackle the why, then it sure to happen again. When I knew the why then it became easy for me to forgive. I had to run the Priest out of town (he was a foreigner) to break the spell he had on my wife. Cleric are highly manipulative people and the tragedy here is they make you think you are doing the right thing or they are bringing you closer to GOD.

Dear poster, you have conscience. That alone is a very good thing. And I can sense true repentance. My advice to you is don't tell your husband, recognize that you were a victim and not a cheat. I don't know your husband but what I know is 90% of men can't handle a cheating spouse. The knowledge will break him.

Fourwinds:
hmmmm....what a heart

Do u have a problem with my opinion?
There are over 170 million people in Nigeria ,we have diverse views and opinion and u must learn to respect peoples opinion

only 2% of women agree for her to confess....I can imagine a lot out there

istoctober:


l have asked a pastor and he said l shouldn't confess but am worried cos he told me on Sunday that his uncle who is a native doctor will know if l am cheating on him.

How old are you? The man is suspecting u?

wadetaw202:



This is why one should never commit a sin you can't make restitution for. The truth is her sins will still remain until she does restitution; that is, confess to her hubby.

Talking nonsense.
She's asked God for forgiveness, her sins are forgiven.

YelloweWest:
Stop that. U are not better than her. It was clearly a mistake.

Mistake u called it? Welsone sir/ma

1260days:


Talking nonsense.
She's asked God for forgiveness, her sins are forgiven.

I can as well be elected as a politician, steal money meant for the people and keep it for myself, then repent and beg God for forgiveness without returning the money and confessing to d people and start claiming God has forgiven me.

Forgiveness is not complete without restitution.

Your reasoning is stupid.

Topgainer:

First and foremost, adultery and fornication is not permissible in Christianity. Therefore, I encourage married ones to be contented with the partners (one's husband or wife) and the singles to be patient. It saves a lot regrets.

The Restitution/Confession you are asking the woman to do is not Christianity. How many of your dirty crimes have you restituted?
One of your Holier- than -my- neighbour- brother quoted 'confess sin one to another' out of context to mean restitution on another thread. I was short of asking your gang members how often you have gone to your parents to confess all the evil you did away from home. Similar, to the foolish restitution of sending a second wife packing with her kids. Pentecostal overlords like the Pharisees are in the habit of digging out things out of context, yoking the gullible followers to laws and long lists of burdens.
I dislike hypocrisy most especially from holier- than -thou- gangs. You said the woman will not make Heaven, will go to the hell you created if she doesn't confess to the husband. I make bold to tell you that if there is any such hell that you make the rules for admission, then you are the number one on the admission lists for such hell.
Confessing sin to one another has nothing to do with Heaven or Hell, it is an advice that is intended to help people forestall a repeat of the sin and being an advice, when wrongly applied like confessing to the wrong person will give a disastrous outcome that the devil will wish for. And that is the case with this woman.

Baba, carry your mumu crap commot for here mehn! You yarn more crap with each post! You want to set your own convenient rules for Christianity, ba?
No wahala! She doesn't even need to confess to God too! She can as well be pregnant for the pastor she cheated with, have the child & deceive the husband that he's the father, & she wouldn't need to ever confess to him (since it's an advice according to you) because of the great repercussion on her marriage, so far she has confessed & sought forgiveness from God. Continue!