bukatyne:


The right thing to do is to return the money without a prompt or refund any money overpaid.

However, I understand that this is Nigeria and people throw integrity and morals out of the window when it comes to money.

What shocks me is her blatant denial even when the hubby to be initially called her.

so i should return some few thousands to a company that is worth billions of naira... Imagine pouring a bucket of water into river Niger

kalufelix:
..don't know why i find this your response amusing...the point here is that you don't take what does not belong to you right? I'll give you another scenario this one actually happened for real... Some time ago i used to wash cars for a living so on this particular day this bus (big ones) just came back from work and then straight to car wash...i was supposed to sweep the floor before using water in the course of that i discovered something on the floor wrapped in a black nylon..behold it was currency... I counted.. it was 12K... Obviously it doesn't belong to the driver... My question now is what will mrBrownjay do?

you are trying so hard to validate your fraudulent nature. I agree with his first statement. I'll return the 12k if I know from whose pocket it fell from.

Aparche:


It's one thing being tempted by such an amount of money and then trying to play a fast one by keeping it to yourself; that is greed. But when a human being like her calls & begs her to return the money because he made a mistake, and she still refused and instead proceeded to transfer it to another bank account just so that they won't touch it. Then that is wickedness, and goes to show that she is inconsiderate. And then when the person she loves call to ask her about the money, she denies it, until he confronted her with proof. Kai! This one has gone beyond mistake abeg. This is character problem, and in marriage we pray to marry someone with good character.

.....You are among the few people here that truly understand the weight of her offence.

The way you explained it to the person you mentioned was amazing.

WILLuKPquiet:


You are right babe. Its too bad when its even by a lady.
years back I went to withdraw money at the bank I didn't use my ATM. I asked for ten thousand naira and the lady at counter counted the money and gave it to me. I did not count it. I just put it in my pocket and left.
I had already boarded a taxi when a call came in. "Hello Mr. Oluwaseun, I am sorry the money I gave you is more than you asked for. I know you did not count it. I gave you double pls sir can you help me by bringing it back" the lady begged.

I dipped my hand in my pocket counted the money and it was twenty thousand. So, I called her that on my way back from where I was going I would bring it and later I did.

If I had denied it there was nothing she could have done with it. She would only need to balance her account by refunding it from her pocket, but Integrity is too important to be ignored by me.

The guy has done well. But he could still tamper justice with mercy.

@gloryon, look at this response why didn't the teller just reverse the money from this persons account? why did she need to call and beg? that guy was trying to educate you but una ignorance too much

OChimex:


Integrity is everything for you and many more hypocritic Nigerians when it has to do with another person and about money, yet almost every of you Nigerians lacks integrity in all spheres of life, marriage, relationship, etc.

He who goes to equity must come with clean hands.

I have never seen a country bereft of integrity like Nigeria which is why they celebrate criminals and have a messed up country.

my conclusion. If he had never sin in that way before (integrity wise) let him cast the first stone, but if he has, let him think deeply again about his decision because every human being has a flaw in one way or the other.

And how do we clean up our messed up country if nobody faces the consequences of their actions,because according to you everyone is doing it

OChimex:


Integrity is everything for you and many more hypocritic Nigerians when it has to do with another person and about money, yet almost every of you Nigerians lacks integrity in all spheres of life, marriage, relationship, etc.

He who goes to equity must come with clean hands.

I have never seen a country bereft of integrity like Nigeria which is why they celebrate criminals and have a messed up country. They dont even understand the word integrity.

my conclusion. If he had never sin in that way before (integrity wise) let him cast the first stone, but if he has, let him think deeply again about his decision because every human being has a flaw in one way or the other.

....Stop trying to manipulate people with this your emotional blackmail.

Can you marry a thief because you re not perfect?

I guess he should just forgive her if that's her only flaws... Perhaps she acted based on the current situation of things without considering the consequences that she can't even get away with it...

kalufelix:
How much are we talking about here.... Pay excess money enter my account and be waiting for integrity...integrity bawo... Because she is a woman... She even used the mofo as her next of kin... I need to marry that babe. Hypocrites everywhere!

Careful what you wish for...

SIR0:
The lady keeps begging & crying. Money can be tempting

No one should come and prove HOLY HOLY here on top money matter.

He could pause the wedding plan but cancelling it is proving overrighteousness.

Can you say this if you were in front of God

Good point. But I think you have left the question. Except you are saying whenever God leads you to a spouse, the spouse will definitely have integrity. Although Rebecca was a product of Divine hand, yet she joined her son to play her husband.

Righteousness89:
Integrity is a Priceless Character!
Very Important in Marriage..
Lack of it could lead to endless woes and pains!

Having said that, Marriage is a life time commitment.. pls if you are not Divinely led to a spouse, pls do not enter..

Pls Be patient for divine guidance in Marriage, it it saves you from lots of struggles and stress..

I say this from Experience..


Marriage is like a Journey, you don't know what it holds..
But if you are guided and led by the Alpha and Omega, the one who knows all, then what he gives to you will definitely be a joy..

Good move

JONNYSPUTE:
....So what are you implying?

He should go ahead and marry her,she ain't a bad girl,a swallow does not make a summer.Do any mortal man have integrity,you may be good in one area and bad in another.you can never be the jesus of this world.

the guy should pray that God should order his steps, but for me I won't marry someone like that ooh

Oga marry that girl, 3 yrs is not a joke, no girl is perfect. The next one might be a cheat.

Trayceey:
He should forgive her and marry her. She loves and trusts him so much for her to make him her next of kin

be like you never Jam , this kind of lady if she comes across N50m she can abscond , abandoning her marriage and her husband will be arrested to provide her .

The transfer act no be the issue , it’s not telling her partner that such thing happened so he can speak from an informed position.

JONNYSPUTE:
....Stop trying to manipulate people with this your emotional blackmail.

Can you marry a thief because you re not perfect?

When you who is calling out another is an armed robber?

My point is, if a skeleton can be found in your cupboard, do not be too quick to condemn others who might have cobwebs in their cupboards.

He should ask himself two questions.

1. Has this girl exhibited such a character before?

2. Does she have a dire financial need that pushed her to do that?

He should listen to her explanations, sometimes wrong friends give people wrong advice they regret in the future.

Klass99:
The act of moving the money into a different bank account alone speaks volumes.

I will hesitate and have reservations about moving forward with a wedding/marriage to this person BUT on the other hand I believe in second chances.

Sensible people don't take 2nd chances for granted and they often do better when given a shot at a chance to redeem themselves and prove themselves.

If I were the man, I will put marriage plans on hold, extend the dating/courting period and give this person a chance at rebuilding my trust in her. If I messed up too I wouldn't want to be instantly and completely written off.

You couldn’t have said it better, why transfer it to another bank. It was a conscious act. I believe this young man was so blinded by love that he hasn’t noticed some of her nuance inclinations.

....but at the bolded, Sadly It is not the case with most people and I’ve come to the realization that “people are who they are”. Even meeting a person that has a habit of not keeping his/her word it is a serious red flag to me, such a small habit takes great effort to overcome in a person that is already used to such. Yes people can make small adjustments here and there but their core doesn’t change. In a case like this fundamentally dishonest person would always be dishonest whenever the perfect opportunity arises.

Plus the lady could pretend for the extended period, but believe me she would come to resent his action of putting her on probation. When people reveal who they are, believe them. It’s best he let’s her go.

OChimex:


Integrity is everything for you and many more hypocritic Nigerians when it has to do with another person and about money, yet almost every of you Nigerians lacks integrity in all spheres of life, marriage, relationship, etc.

He who goes to equity must come with clean hands.

I have never seen a country bereft of integrity like Nigeria which is why they celebrate criminals and have a messed up country. They dont even understand the word integrity.

my conclusion. If he had never sin in that way before (integrity wise) let him cast the first stone, but if he has, let him think deeply again about his decision because every human being has a flaw in one way or the other.

NB: Think deeply... I mean, he should ask himself, has this girl shown in the past that she is such a person and irredeemable?
Does she have a pressing need for money that would have pushed her to do that?
This last question is very important because, if you had ever been a financial mess for so long and seem to have no solution coming your way, you will understand what it means to be in dire financial problem. you could even steal Money kept in a shrine.

Ok. Marry the lady.

Have fun

coputa:
He should go ahead and marry her,she ain't a bad girl,a swallow does not make a summer.Do any mortal man have integrity,you may be good in one area and bad in another.you can never be the jesus of this world.

....Ok. Good.

Can you knowingly marry a man or a woman who has been exposed to have criminal tendency just because you are not perfect?

After 3 year If this is the issue u have against her forgive and forget because nobody is perfect.

khalids:


Can you say this if you were in front of God

If god was even real n I was in is present, he has alot of questions to answer.

OChimex:


When you who is calling out another is an armed robber?

My point is, if a skeleton can be found in your cupboard, do not be too quick to condemn others who might have cobwebs in their cupboards.

He should ask himself two questions.

1. Has this girl exhibited such a character before?

2. Does she have a dire financial need that pushed her to do that?

He should listen to her explanations, sometimes wrong friends give people wrong advice they regret in the future.

...My question was straight.You just beating around the bush.

Can you marry a thief because you re not perfect?

Yes or no.

Goalnaldo:
you are trying so hard to validate your fraudulent nature. I agree with his first statement. I'll return the 12k if I know from whose pocket it fell from.

commercial drivers may drive all the way from abuja to enugu once they discharge their passengers at the final bus stop..they drive straight to car wash. No IFs and BUTs.. I made everything clear ... Its just you and the empty bus.. The driver is coming back in 1 hour to carry his car and pay you for your service.

lanreHeda:
And how do we clean up our messed up country if nobody faces the consequences of their actions,because according to you everyone is doing it

That is not the point. I spoke in parables.

My points are, he should ask himself two questions before condemning the girl.

1. Has she exhibited such character before which might prove her to be a hardened criminal?

2. Does she have a dire financial needs that pushed her to do that?

being seriously broke can push one do what he or she is not.
bad friends can as well advise one to take stupid actions they might regret.

That someone did something once doesn't make that person a bad person.

Why will she lie at first?
Well, the guy should pardon her....

SSpeter:
A friend is calling off his wedding plans because he thinks his girlfriend lacks integrity. They have known for about 3years and he has not complained about her to me or any one.

Problem started when he got a call from the bank pleading with him to tell his girlfriend to reverse/return the excess amount credited to her account when she visited the bank to make a deposit into her account. He called his account officer to investigate the issue. The account officer confirmed that she got excess of what she wanted to deposit and she has moved all the funds to another bank.

She used the guy as her next of kin that was how they could contact him. He called his babe who denied initially but reluctantly agreed when he divulged that the bank contacted him. Dude became angry and paused all wedding plans.

The lady s begging and has cried her eyes out...what do you think? can you compromise integrity...?

I got permission to write about this here incase you think xyz and my friend is a Nairalander!

She begged him because she's only interested in marriage, otherwise she wouldn't have done so.

For me, the guy shoud forgive her but probably test her before he eventually ties the knot.

Let him do what he will. The truth is women rarely changes with exception of a very few who do self assessment from time to time. Anything she brings along as a character will be intensified in the coming years. I am a living witness. The only reason why I have not divorced mine is simply because of my two beautiful girls. The more you want to be a good homely man the more they try to bend you with complains and the final goal is to reduce me to a house maid, Oh I saw it all coming. So my advice is Let him do what he wilt

SSpeter:
A friend is calling off his wedding plans because he thinks his girlfriend lacks integrity. They have known for about 3years and he has not complained about her to me or any one.

Problem started when he got a call from the bank pleading with him to tell his girlfriend to reverse/return the excess amount credited to her account when she visited the bank to make a deposit into her account. He called his account officer to investigate the issue. The account officer confirmed that she got excess of what she wanted to deposit and she has moved all the funds to another bank.

She used the guy as her next of kin that was how they could contact him. He called his babe who denied initially but reluctantly agreed when he divulged that the bank contacted him. Dude became angry and paused all wedding plans.

The lady s begging and has cried her eyes out...what do you think? can you compromise integrity...?

I got permission to write about this here incase you think xyz and my friend is a Nairalander!

JONNYSPUTE:
....Ok. Good.

Can you knowingly marry a man or a woman who has been exposed to have criminal tendency just because you are not perfect?

nobody is perfect, she made a bad decision or was ill advice.

Yankee101:
'I trust you is more loving than I love you'
Abeg you get bobo or you still single?

Single

JONNYSPUTE:
...My question was straight.You just beating around the bush.

Can you marry a thief because you re not perfect?

Yes or no.

That is childish.



Swear that you haven't stolen/taken what was not yours all your life. does that make you an armed robber or thief now?

doing something bad once doesn't make one a horrible person.

That is why he needed yo ask those deep questions.

Stealing is not the only thing bad. Betrayal, back stabbing, lying against someone, name them.

double77:

nobody is perfect, she made a bad decision or was ill advice.

..You did not answer my question.

Agreed nobody is perfect

Can you marry a thief?